Some people you just can’t reach.

Mercy me, it’s Thursday already? That it is, and I completely missed on the midweek blog. Sorry about that.

However, others have been gathering string on my behalf. On someone’s behalf, anyway. While I strive to find the top of my desk under a shifting stack of work, please enjoy:

Eric Zorn, a Chicagoan, justly praises Illinois Gov. J.B. Pritzker’s stirring call to action, delivered in New Hampshire on Sunday. You probably saw piece of it here and there, and if you didn’t, rest assured: It was a good’un:

Never before in my life have I called for mass protests, for mobilization, for disruption, but I am now. These Republicans cannot know a moment of peace. They have to understand that we will fight their cruelty with every megaphone and microphone that we have. We must castigate them on the soapbox and then punish them at the ballot box.

They must feel in their bones that when we survive this shameful episode of American history with our democracy intact — because we have no alternative but to do just that — that we will relegate their portraits to the museum halls reserved for tyrants and traitors. … I’m telling you what I’m willing to do, and that’s fight for our democracy, for our liberty, for the opportunity for all of our people to live lives that are meaningful and free.

Being in Chicago, he was able to report the Tribune’s, and the Illinois GOP’s, ridiculous reaction:

The Illinois Republican Party rushed to the fainting couch in a news release Monday headlined, “Pritzker Calls For Violence Toward Republicans.”

JB Pritzker’s attempt to woo New Hampshire Democrats as he barrels towards the 2028 Democrat primary was full of divisive and inflammatory rhetoric. Pritzker’s obsession, to insult and to chastise President Trump, showed forcefully as he stoked the crowd in calling for political violence against Republicans.

The Tribune reported:

Donald Trump Jr., the president’s son, reposted a clip of Pritzker’s speech on social media and asked, “Are you trying to inspire a 3rd assassination attempt on my dad?” And deputy White House chief of staff Stephen Miller in Washington also criticized the remarks, saying they “could be construed as inciting violence.”

“The destruction of property sits directly adjacent to the — to attacks on humans, physical attacks,” said Miller, who also cited the past assassination attempts on Trump.

Easy there, Grand Old Paranoids. Fighting with “every microphone and megaphone that we have” is call for protests and rhetoric, not a call to take up bear spray, baseball bats and flagpoles, as those who answered the call from Dear Leader did on Jan. 6, 2021.

When you’ve pissed off both Don Jr. and Stephen Miller, you know you’ve hit a nerve. Keep it up, governor.

Eric’s Substack is pretty good, btw. He publishes twice a week, with the Chicago-heavy content going in the Tuesday edition, the paid one. Thursday’s is friendlier to non-Chicagoans.

Bonus Zorn: Exploring the origins of the word “tilt” as a synonym for malfunction, and its roots in pinball, he quotes from “Wired,” Bob Woodward’s book:

In his 1984 book “Wired: The Short Life and Fast Times of John Belushi,” author Bob Woodward described the coked-up actor at one point as “like a pinball machine on tilt, out of control.”

The quote made me wince, because it’s such a perfect illustration of what a leaden writer Woodward is. I remember reading “Wired” and thinking, how can a book about a comedian be so unfunny? FWIW, a pinball machine on tilt is not “out of control,” it’s dead. Activating the tilt sensors makes the machine freeze and lets the ball roll out of play. But the book was full of passages like that. Probably the worst was Woodward on the chizborger-chizborger sketch, an SNL classic, which he lays out in such excruciating detail that it isn’t even mildly amusing.

In other news, I recently became aware of a publication called Michigan Enjoyer. Hmm, what’s this, I thought, and clicked on their About page, where I read:

Michigan Enjoyer is Michigan media for those who relish the beauty of life here and are tired of apologizing for it.

Wha-? Huh? As one who enjoys the beauty of life here and has never once apologized for it, or even thought I should, I read on:

An antidote to the boring, biased, and out-of-touch local media, we’re here to breathe vitality back into a state that used to overflow with it. You “problematic” Michiganders too busy building to be depressed and offended—you’re our driving force.

Oh. OK. If you scratch someone upset about the boring, biased and out-of-touch local media, nine times out of 10 you’ll find a right-winger, and whaddaya know, I’m right. Here’s a recent headline:

DTW Is the Democrat Dream

Subhed: It’s an ultra-safe surveillance state full of high-end luxuries, so why do we all hate being there?

What follows is a glimpse into the mind of an editorial team who thinks some people go around apologizing for enjoying the beauty of life in Michigan. While I despise the early-2000s habit of dissecting blogs line-by-line, once known as “fisking,” I must say this column was just one jaw-dropper after another:

Detroit Metropolitan Airport is a leftist utopia. Everything is pre-packaged, arbitrary rules are strictly enforced, and Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson’s voice even blares over the loudspeakers.

That’s the lead. First of all, it’s a what? And how does pre-packaged everything make it so? At a time when having the wrong tattoo and a Chicago Bulls cap can get you sent to a concentration camp, is this the time to whine about arbitrary rules from a conservative corner? As for Benson’s voice, he’s objecting to a recording played every so often in recent weeks, reminding travelers that the Real ID deadline is absolutely coming for real this time, and they should be mindful. We heard it when we went to New Orleans. I don’t recall it being all that frequent, or in any way blaring.

I should stop here to confess my prejudice: I like our airport. I don’t like that it’s on the other side of the county, but I can live with that. The entrances and exits make sense, there are plenty of restrooms, moving sidewalks, a tram, lots of food choices and it’s never less than reasonably clean. But most important, it’s a hub. You can fly nonstop from Detroit to Tokyo, for crying out loud. Spend 20 years of your life in someplace like Fort Wayne, and then come back to me with your complaints. In that city, the choice was always to either pay significantly more to book a vacation flight out of there, or save the extra dough by driving to Indianapolis or Chicago, which isn’t so bad when you’re departing, full of we’re-on-vacation high spirits. When you return, tired and road-weary, you now face a 110- or 150-mile drive to your house, and that part sucks.

But it’s the nature of this guy’s complaints that blow my mind:

(Airports) are always regulated by county- or city-port authorities and almost always located within or adjacent deep blue urban hubs. They even have special police forces and federal TSA security apparatchiks enforcing terminal access.

…When faced with overt government regulation, travelers are forced through a slightly humiliating screening process, as frequent flyers pay for quicker security sweeps.

…The McNamara and Evans terminals look less like airports and more like suburban malls. The PGA Tour Shop, Johnston & Murphy, Estee Lauder, Brookstone, and iStore Express. These are global brands for a super-striver consumer. But it’s a command economy with a neoliberal flavor. Travelers are captured and repeatedly price gouged due to a lack of competition.

Welcome to every single airport in the country, except for the smaller ones like Fort Wayne, which probably doesn’t have a Johnston & Murphy, Estée Lauder, etc. The big thing everyone mentions about FWA is this: A crew of greeters offers warm cookies to arrivals. This is nice! I’d love a cookie. It would sustain me on my 150-mile final drive to my destination.

But so many questions have I! The terminals “look less like airports and more like suburban malls?” What should airports look like, because in between those mall stores and restaurants are gates with windowed walls where you can see planes. Would you prefer a three-sided shed, a wind sock and a crew that starts the planes by pulling on the propeller, the pilot in a leather helmet giving a thumbs-up from the cockpit? I prefer the modern version, even if it comes with a neoliberal flavor. And price-gouging? People don’t shop at the airport for bargains — it’s on the other side of security. You shop there because you forgot to pack something, or you’re bored, or you have money to burn. Expect to pay a premium for this.

Then he bitches again about Real ID, claiming “what it really appears to be is a state (and federal) cash grab to force adults over the age of 18 to get brand new state ID cards that are somehow harder to falsify.” Why do we have this law? Because the 9/11 Commission recommended it. It was passed by Congress and signed into law by, anyone? George W. Bush. Full implementation has been delayed now for 20 years. If it were a cash grab, it’s a pretty shitty one. But I’d point out to this writer that it’s no more onerous than the requirements they want to enshrine in the SAVE Act, the one that will require new voters to prove their citizenship to register. 9/11 actually happened. But non-citizens voting is vanishingly rare.

Oh, well. Some people will never be happy. I’ll offer this miserable traveler one pro tip: TSA Pre is the single best $80 I ever spent, even factoring in the hassle of having to be fingerprinted. It’s good for five years, and every time I fly, which isn’t often, I’m glad I did it. But then, I’m a Democrat. And I like having a cocktail before I board, even if it is overpriced.

The last thing I’ll say about Michigan Enjoyer: It’s the latest stop on the downward spiral of Charlie LeDuff’s career. And he’s doing the same thing to them that he did to Deadline Detroit: Cut/paste his column into his own social media, thereby depriving his publisher of the click. What a guy.

OK, it’ll be Friday in 24 hours and I still have work to do. Enjoy the weekend, and let’s hope there’s fewer chores next week.

Posted at 3:56 pm in Current events, Detroit life |
 

25 responses to “Some people you just can’t reach.”

  1. Brandon said on May 1, 2025 at 4:30 pm

    The Enjoyer: The title reminds me of this song.

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  2. LindaG said on May 1, 2025 at 4:31 pm

    I’ve flown in and out of FWA a few times in the last couple years. The cookie greeters are pretty rare now. (Lack of volunteers, I think.) Sometimes cookies are available to help yourself. I like our airport because once you’re through security, you are clear through Chicago, Charlotte, or wherever your next stop is. Also, it’s a pretty short walk to almost anywhere you need to go. There’s lots of renovation going on now.

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  3. Julie Robinson said on May 1, 2025 at 4:44 pm

    The cookies haven’t been hot for a good 10 years or so, either. But if you head just to the left at the greeters’ desk or info desk, whatever it’s called, there should be a basket there.

    Every single complaint Mr. Enjoyer has is because of Republican laws. What a JA. And yes, everything’s packaged –did he think he would find a bulk candy section or a salad bar? The shops are because people often have long waits if the security lines moved faster than anticipated. He’s a tool.

    Pre Check is wonderful although frustrating because every agent has their own ideas about taking out tablets. Sometimes phones, too. Last time I was behind a guy arguing about the papers in his pants pockets. He had to keep going through the Xray, and the agent reminded him he been told to take everything out, even Kleenex. No one thinks the rules apply to them anymore.

    Our new sliding glass doors passed inspection and they are wondrous. House is already quieter, and no worries about hurricanes taking them out.

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  4. Julie Robinson said on May 1, 2025 at 4:56 pm

    Speaking of airports, our daughter just went to the wrong one and almost missed her flight out of DC. The ADD is strong in this one.

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  5. alex said on May 1, 2025 at 5:17 pm

    I miss reading Eric Zorn. Glad to know he’s alive and kicking and I’ll have to add him to my already daunting reading list that’s keeping me glued to my computer way the hell too much.

    The Enjoyer certainly enjoys bitching and moaning, and it all sounds like the same sort of specious crap being fed to resentful whitefolk by Laura Ingraham and her ilk. You’d think even those dreary souls would tire from too much of this stuff. Everything is a leftist, elitist conspiracy to make them feel butt-hurt. They’d be better off if they would only get a clue that they’re being had and rightfully blame the messengers.

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  6. Jeff Borden said on May 1, 2025 at 5:30 pm

    I’ll post a controversial statement: I like O’Hare. Ingress abd egress are sumple and logical and very aggressive cops keep traffic moving. Inside
    It’s relatively easy to negotiate. There are plenty of eateries including local places. Several book stores. Yeah, it’s expensive but show me an airport that isn’t. And, oh, the direct flights. The only foreign capital we could ot fly direct was Lisbon.

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  7. Deborah said on May 1, 2025 at 6:39 pm

    We went to the protest today and ended up with a picture in the Chicago Tribune, #29 of 38 photos in the series online, I’d include a link but I don’t have a subscription, I was able to click on it once and see it but I guess that’s the only one I’m allowed. A woman reporter took the photo and then asked our names, my husband was reluctant but agreed to give our first names, I guess he’s afraid Musk could sue us or something. Anyway it rained in the morning and light rain off and on, it rained hard for about 5 minutes while we were marching. It was a long walk from Union Park to Grant Park and slow, that kind of walking tires me out way more than fast walking. It didn’t go down Randolph as I thought but of course they didn’t want a protest to go right through the loop area and disrupt traffic. It went down Washington then cut over south somewhere I forget where, then back east on Jackson to Grant Park. It was hard to calculate how many people in all, my husband guessed 8,000 at the most. The weather had an effect on attendance unfortunately. If any of you with a Tribune subscription can put a link to the Tribune photo in comments herewith I’d appreciate it, I didn’t get a copy of it. All in all We walked 7.5 miles today.

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  8. Dexter Friend said on May 1, 2025 at 11:05 pm

    Many years ago there was a network series called “Journey Man.” The lead would go into a trance and awake in different eras. Once he woke in an airliner from the 1970’s. The cabin, thick with cigarette smoke, had drunken suits yelling at the “stewardesses” for more booze as they walked the aisles. It was a good reminder of the way it was when I traveled by air at times then.
    The cookie comments remind me of the Toledo VA. In the atrium was a little space where volunteer ladies served warm choco-chip and raisin cookies, and coffee, all gratis. Covid19 killed that. There is a Starbucks there, always closed when I go in the afternoon. Not free by a damn sight.

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  9. Colleen said on May 2, 2025 at 12:06 am

    I used to like flying out of FWA….once when we went through security, the TSA guy had to put down his newspaper to check us through.
    European airports are waaaay better than US airports. My experience this fall was that they were just…nicer. And the bathrooms in Brussels were positively civilized. No stalls,actual little rooms with doors and ceilings.

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  10. Jeff Gill said on May 2, 2025 at 7:39 am

    Just scroll down to “Husband and wife Steve and Deborah hold signs while gathering at Union Park for the May Day march, May 1, 2025, honoring working people for International Workers’ Day, before marching to Grant Park.” — and it’s a great photo! I think it’s been, what, ten years since we met in New Mexico? You both look good. Nice work on the signs, too.

    https://www.chicagotribune.com/2025/05/01/photos-thousands-march-through-downtown-chicago-for-may-day/

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  11. Deborah said on May 2, 2025 at 7:50 am

    The only time we have to go through OHare is for international flights, we do all of our flying through Midway. I associate OHare with anxiety. And the return to OHare is always pure hell, jet lagged and frumpled to the max, waiting in the long, long customs line. Misery.

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  12. Suzanne said on May 2, 2025 at 9:00 am

    Once we flew an early-ish flight out of Fort Wayne and security hadn’t even opened yet. We had to wait until somebody found a TSA person. Easiest security check ever since we were the only ones there! We used to drive to Indy for direct flights, but our last few flights were from Fort Wayne since at this point in life, we’d rather pay more than fight the insane Indy traffic.

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  13. alex said on May 2, 2025 at 9:56 am

    Great photo, Deborah!

    Our local event got rather poor coverage on WANE-TV, where they always let local GOP chairman Steve Shine have the last word, and it’s always a lengthy statement full of cheap shots at Democrats:

    “… Their agenda was resoundingly rejected by voters on November 5th, when they threw everything against the wall, but it wouldn’t stick.”

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  14. Heather said on May 2, 2025 at 10:52 am

    Nice picture, Deborah! You two look super chic as always.

    I like O’Hare too. Yes it gets crowded but there’s lots of space. I can take a quick bus ride and the el to the airport, so it’s pretty easy and cheap. I flew out of CDG in Paris a few years and it reminded me to be grateful for what we have. I flew to LGA in New York last year and ended up in the new terminal—also very nice.

    There’s a lot to be dismayed by these days, but I am particularly disheartened that a woman in Minnesota who was caught on video calling a 5-year-old the N word has racked up like $150k in donations on one of those funding sites. Sigh. Maybe this country does need to burn to the ground.

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  15. alex said on May 2, 2025 at 11:30 am

    Speaking of the Fort Wayne Airport, I’d link an article here but it’s paywalled.

    Anyway, FWA just announced it’s opening a VIP lounge for which you have to shell out $150 per year for a membership or $30 for a day pass. I don’t know what kind of fool would part with money for that. If they’re staffing it with extra personnel I doubt it will break even.

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  16. Deborah said on May 2, 2025 at 12:01 pm

    Thanks for the link Jeff G. I thought it was pretty cool that the photographer got sears tower off in the distance in the shot.

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  17. Deborah said on May 2, 2025 at 12:33 pm

    I any of you haven’t watched From Russia with Lev, it’s still available and shows some unbelievable corruption https://www.docplus.com/details/from-russia-with-lev/5nOalXGL/

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  18. Mark P said on May 2, 2025 at 2:39 pm

    I have been to Midway, but not in a plane. I was living in Huntsville, Al, and had a BMW motorcycle engine to sell. A guy living on the West Coast wanted it. He worked for a company that flew cancelled checks around the country, and sometimes they flew into Midway. A friend and I put the engine in the back of my truck and drove up to Chicago. The plane, a Lear, was to be there very early in the morning. We met the guy, put the engine into the jet, and watched them leave. Then we turned to each other and said, “Now what?” So, we turned around and drove back to Huntsville.

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  19. Dexter Friend said on May 2, 2025 at 3:15 pm

    “Stay away from Newark at all costs.”
    This is what an air traffic controller told an NBC reporter today.
    Flights into Newark are being held 2 to 4 hours, if you are fortunate.
    It’s an 80% meltdown there…short-staffing everywhere at the airport. Many flights are landing at Stewart International Airport and making passengers wait for hours-on-end for a connection.
    My wife had a situation at Toledo Express 7 years ago…she was flying from there to connect for an Orlando destination. Her plane was a connector jet, an RJ. She was just 45 minutes early but nobody was around. Finally someone showed up and then maybe 6 other passengers arrived . So much for the days of getting there 3 hours before your flight.

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  20. Dexter Friend said on May 3, 2025 at 1:38 am

    Three things I excel at: cooking vegetable + stir-frys. 2) driving any vehicle anywhere safely. and 3) tilting a pinball machine.
    Three things I suck at: fixing anything mechanical. 2) sleeping at night. 3) winning anything more than $300 on any lottery bet.

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  21. Cheez Whiz said on May 3, 2025 at 12:24 pm

    One of the later Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy books starts off with “There is a reason no language has the phrase ‘as pretty as an airport'”.

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  22. Deborah said on May 3, 2025 at 5:44 pm

    Don’t get me started on airport design. Why do so many airports use the vernacular of airplane design, swooping steel and then add lots of glass, when it could be a gateway to the city they’re in or at least the city or region they’re close to. The Albuquerque airport, they call it a sunport, looks more like the architecture of the indigenous people of the area that has been adopted in the region, stucco made to look adobe-ish and brick, which was added later, but still somewhat historical. When you land there you feel like you’re entering a different place, which you are. I don’t think ABQ is the best designed airport but at least it isn’t generic. There’s a newish airport in Singapore that is an amazing tropical garden. The airport in Jackson Hole, Wyoming is another one where you get a taste of where you are instead of any old airport that could be anywhere. I get that many US cities are mostly generic nowadays but at least the airports could feel welcoming instead of vast, cold, confusing labyrinths of concourses and gates full of aggrieved, anxious people. Some airports have improved in the last few years but for a while airports were like urinals, something you needed but they certainly didn’t want to spend any money or effort on.

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  23. Jeff Gill said on May 3, 2025 at 8:35 pm

    I haven’t been there since 1999, but Bozeman had a small airport like ABQ’s, one that felt like it was introducing me to the town I was arriving at. Wichita’s was quite pleasant, but I was last there in 2008 . . . I do enjoy going in and out of ABQ’s Sunport, though.

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  24. alex said on May 4, 2025 at 9:00 am

    Sovereignty defeats Journalism. Would have sucked losing to Publisher, though.

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  25. David C said on May 4, 2025 at 10:01 am

    This Derby confirmed what I’ve been saying for years. All the good horse names are taken.

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