Sorry for yet another unexplained absence. Short version: The downside to having relatives your kid can sell Girl Scout cookies to is, you have to go deliver the things, and sometimes this means hundreds of miles of driving.
But Aunt Pam and Uncle Charlie got their Peanut Butter Patties. Uncle Charlie did, anyway; Aunt Pam ordered nought but Shortbreads.
And Kate and I had a chance to travel through Ohio on two bright winter days. I made notes — mental notes, because I was driving — for a creative-writing assignment that’s due, like, Tuesday. Theme: Travelogue. Task: Craft a rough short-short plot around a trip. I tried to think of fiction set in northwestern Ohio. Came up with one, “A Simple Plan.” I read that book once, loved it, and could never bring myself to read it again, and put off seeing the movie until it had left the Current Releases shelf at Blockbuster. The book was so evocative of the feeling a person might have, being stuck in a dead-end town very much like the one my husband is from, that I couldn’t bear to go through it twice. It actually made my chest feel tight.
I don’t think my short story will be that good.
Tomorrow, we deliver cookies to Fort Wayne. On Sunday, back to Ohio. God help me, these are some expensive cookies.
I passed time in Ohio reading reviews of “The Passion of the Christ.” David Edelstein wins the Best Blurbs award, for “the film the Jews don’t want you to see,” “a two hour and six minute snuff film” and “the Jesus Chainsaw Massacre.” “What does this protracted exercise in sadomasochism have to do with Christian faith?” isn’t really a blurb (nor is my first example, really — it’s his distillation of Mel Gibson’s marketing strategy — but I think it makes a good blurb, just the same), but it’s a good question.
Then I got home. Guess what? Someone — lots of someones, actually — have spotted an actual live wolverine in the Thumb, making this the first actual sighting of a wolverine in the Wolverine State, ever. So what does the Freep do with it? Makes a cute story out of it, complete with proposed fun names for the poor beast. Sigh. I give up.
Back in a day or two.