Election roundup.

Kwame pulled it out. I didn’t think he had it in him, as Hendrix had something like a 19-point lead at one point. Four more years of top-shelf liquor on city expense reports? Depends if he can learn from his mistakes.

More shocking was the race for Detroit city clerk, and in this case the upset really counts as “stunning.” The incumbent referred to herself as “clerk for life,” but nuh-uh, not when the FBI marches into your office and impounds all your absentee ballots. Not even in Detroit. The News has done some very fine work on this story, with blood-chilling anecdotes of the clerk’s “elections ambassadors,” paid workers who descended on nursing homes to “help” Alzheimer’s sufferers fill out their ballots. In private. Oh, the humanity:

Investigations were launched following The Detroit News report that illustrated how legally incapacitated nursing home residents were being coaxed to vote, that people were voting from abandoned nursing homes and vacant lots, that the city’s voting rolls were inflated with more than 300,000 names of people who had died or moved out of the city; and the ambassadors had a practice of hand-delivering ballots from senior citizens and disabled voters that were filled out in private meetings with Currie’s paid election workers. Taylor testified last week that one ambassador, former state Rep. Nelis Saunders, said she could “virtually guarantee” an election win for $1,100. Then on Friday, a bureau of election worker testified that she saw an ambassador coax a confused nursing home resident to complete an absentee ballot. Ambassador Gracie Allen asked twice “Do you want to vote for Jackie?” and when the resident failed to respond, the election worker marked the ballot, according to the testimony.

And in the Woods? Our hotly contested, non-partisan — but terribly polite! — mayoral race? Not even close. The incumbent won in a walk, as did all the council incumbents, who will be joined by a newbie, who won the endorsement of the G.P. News by reminding them strongly of all the other long-time incumbents. Platforms across the board: Why rock the boat? (Because the entire metro area is facing economic Holocaust? Because houses are sitting on the market like last season’s orange sweaters? Just a thought.)

Take heart, though, Michiganders — at least you don’t own a house in Kansas. On a fast track to replace that lovely wheat stalk on the license plate with Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel, its Board of Education is, once again, on a roll: The Kansas Board of Education voted Tuesday that students will be expected to study doubts about modern Darwinian theory, a move that defied the nation’s scientific establishment even as it gave voice to religious conservatives and others who question the theory of evolution.

There’s hope in the Keystone State, though.

In Hillsdale, the new mayor still lives with his parents. He’s 18.

And what’s-a-poppin’ up your way?

ADDED: My friend John down in the Park draws our attention to the quote of the day, from the story about results in Oak Park, an Oakland County suburb. The city voted down a proposal to allow by-the-glass liquor sales, an issue that came up when some strange annexation took in a couple of bars last year. One of them was a karaoke club, whose owner says he will now relocate. Why?

“Karaoke without alcohol — it doesn’t go hand-in-hand,” he said.

Tell it, my brutha.

Oh, and Ferndale approved medicinal marijuana.

Posted at 9:51 am in Uncategorized |

15 responses to “Election roundup.”

  1. brian stouder said on November 9, 2005 at 10:30 am

    Thought of you when I read this one


    an excerpt –

    “SACRAMENTO, Calif. – When the Detroit Pistons were introduced before Tuesday night�s game, the Arco Arena scoreboard flashed images of abandoned buildings, burned-out cars � nearly every outdated, offensive stereotype of their hometown.”

    The Pistons went on to whip the other guys

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  2. vince said on November 9, 2005 at 11:07 am

    Smokers aren’t welcome in Washington state. Voters here passed the strictest anti-smoking law in the nation. No more lighting up in bars, restaurants, bowling alleys (that’d die fast in Michigan) and in non-tribal casinos. Big margin too. 63% Yes.

    And in Newport, Oregon the mayor got ousted in a recall. He’d been pushing hard to build a new events center… smack dab on the lowest land possible in the heart of the city’s tsunami inundation zone. (Yes, we’re overdue for a giant earthquake and likely tsunami here.)

    Ever wonder if one vote counts?

    A fire district in Tillamook County, Oregon wanted a bond issue. And they got it. The whopping turnout: YES: 6 NO: 5.

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  3. Nance said on November 9, 2005 at 11:34 am

    Smoking is fast becoming a class issue. Living up here in la-la suburbia, I’d come to take for granted the smoke-free nature of public places. (I’m not even sure what the law is; it’s just rare to even smell cigarette smoke in more affluent areas anymore.) That’s why it was so strange to go to Defiance for the Halloween parade — a small Ohio town that’s still strongly blue-collar — and be seated between two parties of smokers. My favorite image of the evening: Two women standing on the sidewalk, a fussy toddler held by the older woman, who seems to be his grandmother. The child is holding out its arms to mom, and mom takes him from grandma — but not before grabbing three more quick puffs off her cigarette, including one last powerful one that lengthened the glowing tip by half an inch, before throwing it down. She gathered up Junior and turned her head slightly to exhale a giant cloud of smoke just past his baby ear. Yeesh.

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  4. John said on November 9, 2005 at 11:41 am

    Some folk’ll never eat a skunk

    and then again some folk’ll,

    like Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel!

    Most folk’ll never lose a toe

    but then again some folk’ll,

    like Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel!

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  5. Connie said on November 9, 2005 at 12:10 pm

    Certainly the best news of the day was the defeat of the school board incumbents in Dover, PA. Second best news: in Salinas, CA, hometown of John Steinbeck, where the public libraries have been closed since last year, a millage for library support was passed.

    And as to the smoking thing: Should classic movies be edited to remove all signs of smoking? Should any new movie with smoking be rated R? Should Harper Collins, in the just released new edition of “Good Night Moon” have altered illustrator Clement Hurd’s photograph, in which the cigarette that once resided in Clement Hurd’s hand has been digitally removed by the publisher? Do you care? Do you want to vote? See the photos and vote at http://www.goodnightreality.com/ .

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  6. mary said on November 9, 2005 at 12:16 pm

    Ahnuld’s ballot propositions all got shot down here in Ca. Heh heh. The candidate I favored, Jose Huizar, won Antonio Villaraigosa’s old city council seat, and the other vacant seat on the city council was won by someone Villaraigosa endorsed. Looks like our mayor has a friendly bunch to work with. Measure Y, a school district bond, won. Maybe some of the trailers used for temporary classrooms will be replaced. Some are from the seventies.

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  7. adrianne said on November 9, 2005 at 12:41 pm

    From the People’s Republic of Ulster County, NY:

    Republicans got kicked to the curb in general and in specifics, including the good ol’ boy Republican town supervisor who was having a grudge rematch with a Democratic transplant from NYC. She not only beat him handily, she brought two more Democrats with her to the town board. The good ol’ boy actually appeared at my son’s Cub Scout meeting a week before elections to talk about “citizenship” and was having trouble fielding inquiries from 9 year olds. I ask you.

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  8. mary said on November 9, 2005 at 12:59 pm

    I’m trying to focus on work here, but I have the image of cold sober karaoke stuck in my head.

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  9. Dorothy said on November 9, 2005 at 1:30 pm

    Sounds like the audition episodes of American Idol, Mary.

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  10. mary said on November 9, 2005 at 2:19 pm

    I think it would be more like very earnest renditions of I Will Survive, over and over.

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  11. brian stouder said on November 9, 2005 at 2:29 pm

    “I think it would be more like very earnest renditions of I Will Survive, over and over.”

    sung by an over-weight plumber with a Barbara Streisand teeshirt on, and who looks vaguely like Porky Pig

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  12. Dorothy said on November 9, 2005 at 3:13 pm

    Don’t forget the mirrored disco ball undulating overhead.

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  13. brian stouder said on November 9, 2005 at 4:07 pm

    Yes! And glistening “flop-seat” upon his pudgy brow

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  14. brian stouder said on November 9, 2005 at 4:09 pm

    make that “flop SWEAT”!!

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  15. joodyb said on November 10, 2005 at 10:42 am

    Thanks for the goodnightreality link, Connie. That is something.

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