Because I’m an overbooked physical wreck today, it’s All-Bloggage Thursday:
For all my well-documented dislike of Mitch Albom’s “one-man sap factory,” (clever turn of phrase: Amy Alkon) there is one part of his multimedia, the-man-the-myth empire that fails to get on my last nerve: His radio show. I’m not a religious listener, but I’ll tune in every so often, and I hereby give him his props: In a radio world populated by shrieking right-wing lunatics, Albom brings a certain regular-guy decency to the airwaves.
Which is not to say I like him, only that he sounds good in comparison. (Talk radio: Where the Likability Bar is So Low, It’s Underground.) He does, however, do one thing that will get my fingers on the dial in a trice. He name-drops. As I was saying to Tony Bennett the other day.. I was talking to Jeff Daniels, and.. My good friend Warren Zevon… Etc. So I wasn’t surprised to read this in the NYT yesterday, about the Kenny Rogers was-it-pine-tar-or-wasn’t-it question:
In his radio broadcast Monday on the Detroit station WJR, the Detroit Free Press sports columnist Mitch Albom made light of suggestions that Tigers pitcher Kenny Rogers had a strange, dark substance on his hand early in Game 2 of the World Series.
Albom told his listeners that the controversy was the result of reporters with “too much time on their hands.�? He chuckled when he told of how he shook Rogers’s hand after the game and found no foreign substance on it after the left-handed Rogers pitched eight shutout innings in a 3-1 victory.
He did not mention that the standard practice is to shake with the right hand.
Many other sportswriters talked to Kenny Rogers after the game, but Mitch? Mitch shook his hand, and found it unsullied. Then he raced back to his laptop to file a column, the first act for his next play, two more chapters in a novel about an angel who helps a blind girl run a marathon and notes for the cover letter for his Pulitzer entry. Mitch’s hand never has too much time on it. Mitch’s hand offers the Shake of Truth.
OK, I’ll stop. Although I bet if you asked him, he’d stand by his story and say he knows Rogers’ hand was clean because of course the pitcher took the writer’s hard-working paw in both of his hands, and the left one wasn’t sticky, no sir.
As long as we’ve hopped right to the bloggage today, another delayed entry from yesterday, this one on the ex-White House chef and his new book He’s the ex-chef because he couldn’t get along with the Bush team’s social secretary, who sniffed at his “country-club food” and wanted the food to look “just like the pictures” she sent him, clipped from Martha Stewart Living. Most unsurprising news of the week: President and Mrs. Bush are “not adventurous eaters.” You don’t say.
And if you’re a fan of Roz Chast, and who isn’t, you’ll like this NYT feature on Halloween at Chez Roz, where her husband, Bill Franzen, turns the place into a tourist attraction:
He has a calendar inked with important dates: when to sort the extension cords, when to lay out the electricals, move the skeletons, dummies, headstones, mummies, etc. (there are a lot of props) from a storage area in town to a tent set up in the backyard, when to make repairs, tweak past ideas.
When he’s finished, there might be 15 or 20 tableaux — they have titles, like Alien Crash or Death in the Desert or Lunatic Asylum — each marked by an impish, deadpan humor. It’s the Mad Magazine version of Halloween, said Mr. Franzen, who writes fiction the rest of the year and who was spending the day in his tent behind the house, sorting through his props with quiet urgency.
All the fun people are a little crazy. Around here, the peak of Halloween decoration is a few of those giant inflatables, some orange twinkie lights and a fake pumpkin.
I’m not going to say anything about Rush Limbaugh and Michael J. Fox, except to note that judging from the physical evidence, the fat man is back — he was a thinner man for a while, but no more. Which means, I suppose, that he’s giving free rein to at least one of his impulses. Lock up your oxycontin, because it won’t be long now.
I know what I’m doing this weekend: Making Kate Lawson’s Chocolate-Pumpkin Brownies with Apricot Surprise. Why? Because any dish with “surprise” in the name, I’m all for. (Fave National Lampoon cartoon: A waiter pulling the dome off a smoking dish in front of a solitary diner, saying, “It’s a fried telephone book! We gave it a fancy French name, and you ordered it!”)
That’s it. Y’all play in the comments, but I’m off to work. Er, “work.”
Dorothy said on October 26, 2006 at 9:36 am
Didn’t I read somewhere that Kenny Rogers said he washed off the dark stuff after the 2nd inning? And then he continued to pitch terrific baseball for the rest of the game.
A lady in my neighborhood has these cool witches hanging from trees, etc. She has a big cauldron where she puts dry ice and it smokes beautifully. However, she has these lighted baby heads that glow red, sitting in mulch near one of the witches. I think there are around 20 of them. Freaks me out big time.
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John said on October 26, 2006 at 10:17 am
Dorothy,
That sounds lovely, but you know…a picture is worth a thousand words. How about you snapping one and slapping it up on your Flickr page?
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Dorothy said on October 26, 2006 at 10:31 am
Well okay then!
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Danny said on October 26, 2006 at 11:11 am
The thing that cracks me up about baseball is that there is a certain code of cheating that is a time-honored code. As long as one knows and follows the code, everything is cool. It is just part of the game. Funny stuff.
The conjecture is that Tony Larussa could have pushed this harder, during the 1st inning, but he did not because he did not want to embarrass his good friend, Jim Leyland.
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Mindy said on October 26, 2006 at 11:53 am
LADIES, THE MINUTES WILL SOON BE READ TODAY.
THE GARDEN CLUB AND WEAVING CLASS
I`M SURE HAVE MUCH TO SAY.
BUT NEXT WEEK IS OUR CULTURE NIGHT,
OUR BIGGEST, BEST EVENT,
AND I`VE JUST MADE A DISH FOR IT
YOU`LL ALL FIND HEAVEN SENT
IT`S MY LIME JELLO MARSHMALLOW COTTAGE CHEESE SURPRISE
WITH SLICES OF PIMENTO,
(YOU WON`T BELIEVE YOUR EYES,)
ALL TOPPED WITH A PINEAPPLE RING
AND A DASH OF MAYONAISE,
MY VANILLA WAFERS `ROUND THE EDGE
WILL WIN YOUR HIGHEST PRAISE.
AND MISSUS JONES IS MAKING SCONES
THAT ARE FILLED WITH PEANUT MOUSSE;
TO BE FOLLOWED BY A CHICKEN MOLD
THAT`S MADE IN THE SHAPE OF A GOOSE.
FOR LADIES WHO MUST WATCH THOSE POUNDS
WE`VE FOUND A SPECIAL DISH:
STRAWBERRY ICE ENSHRINED IN RICE
WITH BITS OF TUNA FISH.
AND MY LIME JELLO MARSHMALLOW COTTAGE CHEESE SURPRISE
(TRULY A CREATION THAT DESCRIPTION DEFIES)
WILL GO SO WELL
WITH MISSUS BELL`S
CREATION OF THE WEEK:
SHRIMP SALAD TOPPED WITH CHOC`LATE SAUCE
AND GARNISHED WITH A LEEK.
AND MISSUS PERKINS` WALNUT LOAF
THAT`S CROWNED WITH MELTED CHEESE
WAS SUCH A HIT LAST CULTURE NIGHT,
WE ASK: NO SECONDS PLEASE!
NOW YOU MUST TRY HER HOT DOG PIE
WITH CANDIED MUSHROOM SLICES.
THOSE LADIES WHO RESIGNED LAST YEAR,
THEY JUST DON`T KNOW WHAT NICE IS!
BUT MY LIME JELLO MARSHMALLOW COTTAGE CHEESE SURPRISE,
I DID NOT STEAL THAT RECIPE,
IT`S LIES,
I TELL YOU, LIES!
OUR GRAND AWARD:
A PICTURE HAT AND
A SALMON SEQUINED GOWN
FOR ANY GIRL WHO TRIES EACH DISH
AND KEEPS HER WHOLE LUNCH DOWN.
I`M SURE YOU ALL ARE WAITING FOR
THE BIGGEST NEWS: DESERT!
WE`VE THOUGHT OF THINGS
IN MOLDS AND RINGS
YOUR DIET TO SUBVERT.
YOU MUST TRY OUR CHOC`LATE LAYER CAKE ON A PEANUT BRITTLE BASE
WITH SLICES OF BANANAS THAT MAKE A FUNNY FACE.
AROUND THE EDGES PEPPERMINTS
JUST SWIMMING IN PEACH CUSTARD,
WITH LOVELY LITTLE CURLICUES
OF LOVELY YELLOW MUSTARD!
IF ALL THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR YOU,
PERMIT ME TO ADVISE
MORE LIME JELLO MARSHMALLOW COTTAGE CHEESE SURPRISE!
(I`VE MADE HEAPS!)
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Danny said on October 26, 2006 at 12:43 pm
How is it that Mary gets trapped in comment-spam purgatory and Mindy does not? Nothing personal, Mindy, I am just thinking that one of the software flags for spam would be all-caps.
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nancy said on October 26, 2006 at 12:57 pm
Multiple links is more problematic, Danny. Although I don’t know why Mary got caught. (Note that she’s not anymore, at least not today.) She probably gives off some sort of California I’m-Viggo-Mortensen’s-favorite-neighbor vibe that trips the trigger.
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mary said on October 26, 2006 at 1:44 pm
Hey, I can’t help it if I rub elbows with the rich and famous. I rode in an elevator with Ed Begley Jr. last week. Did I flaunt it? Noooo.
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brian stouder said on October 26, 2006 at 2:02 pm
Very commendable, Mary!
If I could bump into a mid-level celebrity in an elevator (there’s a pun in there, somewhere), it would be neat to meet Phil of Amazing Race (Keegan?); or Chris Matthews; or Reba McIntyre (spelling?)
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mary said on October 26, 2006 at 2:19 pm
The most famous people I have spoken to directly are Andy Warhol, John Lennon and Paul McCartney.
Let’s see if this makes it through the spam filter. Hah.
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brian stouder said on October 26, 2006 at 2:49 pm
It would have been interesting to meet John Lennon. If we can believe his ex, you’re lucky Paul didn’t try to clock you!
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mary said on October 26, 2006 at 3:32 pm
I met Paul when Linda was still alive. It was when she was performing with Wings and the sound guy would keep her microphone on low. I met John in NYC in an antique store on Columbus Avenue, and I met Andy Warhol using my former employer’s invitation to a reception when she couldn’t make it.
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Connie said on October 26, 2006 at 4:31 pm
I have ridden an elevator with both Maya Angelou and Helen Thomas. (not at the same time.) In Maya’s case she was the after dinner speaker at the dinner to which I was headed. And Mary, I got to meet Queen Beatrice of the Netherlands using someone else’s invitation.
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Danny said on October 26, 2006 at 4:47 pm
Though I like John Lennon’s music, I tend to side with Julian (you should read the foreword he wrote to his mother’s book). John was not a good father and that is putting it mildly. By most accounts, he also had a pretty nasty heroin habit.
I’d rather meet anyone on this blog than him.
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Dorothy said on October 26, 2006 at 5:05 pm
I’ve met David Letterman and Robert Picardo. Not at the same time, and definitely not in an elevator.
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mary said on October 26, 2006 at 5:49 pm
Connie
I have a calendar that’s sold in NL to raise money for the royal family’s pet charities, and every month has a photo of the royals. Bicycling, playing golf, ice skating…
It’s from about 25 years ago. A real gem.
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Jen said on October 26, 2006 at 6:14 pm
Dorothy, tell all. Where DID you meet DAvid Letterman?
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Dorothy said on October 26, 2006 at 9:05 pm
Wel-l-l, I “met” him at his show in 1987. When he was still at NBC. I had brought a quilt I had made to give him, and before the show started he came out for a quick audience Q&A. I raised my hand and he pointed at me. Simple as that.
We exchanged pleasantries in front of the audience, and when I gave him the quilt he said “Thank you – this is so nice, I don’t even feel like being surly and antagonistic anymore!” Does that still count as meeting him?
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nancy said on October 26, 2006 at 9:08 pm
That’s so sweet. Most girls would have just given him a pair of their panties.
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ashley said on October 27, 2006 at 12:08 am
When I lived in LA, I got dumped by my hostess-at-Spagos girlfriend so she could go back with her old boyfriend, Judd Nelson.
Does that count?
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mary said on October 30, 2006 at 11:39 am
I think it shows a complete lack of taste on her part, Ashley.
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