The puzzling dinner.

Here’s one for you Hoosiers, via reader Ann Fisher, who spotted it on a Chicago-area food board:

I have in-laws who live in Fort Wayne. Every time we go there, we are treated to “beef” and noodles. I thought it was just a family recipe, but when I was in line at the Meijer’s, an 80 yr old woman informed me they were also having beef and noodles for dinner. I asked if it was a regional specialty, and she wasn’t sure, but told me it was a good way to feed a family of nine (!)

The thing is, it’s pretty vile stuff. I have a feeling, after some research, that it’s a drastic perversion of “Amish beef and noodles” from the Amish in that area. Only because both dishes are intended to be served over mashed potatoes. Nothing like a double dose of carbs. But get this. My in-laws serve it with a side of (drumroll) white bread rolls! 3 starches in one sitting!

I believe the iteration of this recipe that I was served consisted of *cans* of a beef product, possibly Hormel. I didn’t want to go into the kitchen to find out, after the dog-food like aroma wafted out. The noodles are actually kind of nice, thick, german spaetzely things. Thus my question- anyone know of this dish, and what brand the noodles are that are generally used? They are maybe 2 in long and 1/4 in diameter, kind of chewy.

There’s so much to love in that post. The assumption that Hoosier beef and noodles must be a perversion of the more authentic Amish dish, assumptions of Amish authenticity being rampant in Chicagoland. (Trust me, honey: The Amish invented canned beef. These people don’t have refrigeration, remember. You wouldn’t believe some of the crap they eat.) The “dog-food like aroma.” The utter bafflement at its presentation, ladled over mashed potatoes. But hey, nice noodles. Where do you buy them?

I can answer her question right off the bat: You don’t. Those kind of noodles you make, but it’s pretty easy. You don’t need a pasta machine, just a rolling pin, a flat surface and a knife. My Jay County-raised neighbor used to make killer chicken and noodles, and she thought making noodles from scratch was about as difficult as opening a carton of milk. As for the triple-starch presentation, all I can say is, if you spent the morning baling hay and were about to spend the afternoon stacking it in the barn, all those carbs would burn off by 2 p.m. and your stomach would start on the protein. The first and only time I ate noodles over potatoes I was doing the rigorous duty of writing a newspaper column, and the effect was soporific. Within 90 minutes I slipped under my desk for a 20-minute nap, and the residue of that meal I carry on my hips to this day. The problem with country cooking is the problem with evolution — it takes a long time for the diet to catch up to the fact you left the farm two generations ago, hence the ample bottoms you see in Indiana, and all over the midwest, for that matter.

As for canned beef, I cannot say. Beef and noodles, in my experience, is usually made with braised chuck or round or another inexpensive cut suitable for the rural proletariat. But it could very well be canned, too. Your in-laws may consider fresh beef something to be reserved for special guests, not Chicago foodies.

The post concludes with a link to the Allen County Public Library’s photo archive, where we see this peculiar local dish being served in a firehouse. This makes me nervous. What if the alarm went off 90 minutes after lunchtime? You’d never be able to rouse the firefighters from their carb coma. Your house would burn down while the safety forces slept off the potatoes.

I know I’ve said this before, but when I was doing talk radio? The most calls I ever got on a single topic? Was on noodles and potatoes, served together.

OK, then.

I have to admit, I feel sorry for Hilary, and it has nothing to do with the tears. Via LGM, I found this, where Kerry Howley draws the obvious conclusion:

Add to this useful list of the worst jobs in the world: consultant to any candidate with breasts. Show emotion and you’re weak; show strength and you’re a collection of servos. Respond to attacks with emotion and you’re “angry.” Respond with equanimity and you’re cold and distant. Shy from war and you’re too feminine to lead; embrace it and you’re the establishment’s whore. And the worst thing you can do? Acknowledge, in any way, shape, or form, the existence of sexism in these United States.

Word.

Since LSU pned the Buckeyes last night, this seems appropriate: Retired , 73-year-old cop kicks butt of armed, road-raging driver. The driver had a .357. The geezer, a cane. And it happened in? Slidell, Loozieanna.

Day two of the January heat wave threatens to drown us under torrents of rain, but what the hell. It’s still above 50 degrees. Have a great day, all.

Posted at 9:42 am in Current events, Same ol' same ol' |
 

43 responses to “The puzzling dinner.”

  1. Jeff said on January 8, 2008 at 9:52 am

    Ditto the classic “Farmer’s Breakfast,” only to be eaten right before heaving 500 bales of straw up into the barn loft. Beef ‘n noodles for lunch, then shovel the bovine end product out of the barn for three hours, milk ’em again, and enjoy your meatloaf and baked potato.

    I still hanker for all that stuff, but haven’t thrown a straw bale into a haymow for decades. That heavy pan in the picture of the firehouse kitchen: that’s the kind of stuff that gave mess halls their name. You could make up a mess of anything, stuff it in the giant West Bend oven, cook it to mush, serve it on the hot line, and throw it into the Hobart dishwasher and have it come out ready to cook for the next meal.

    Good times, good times . . .

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  2. 4dbirds said on January 8, 2008 at 9:58 am

    I was raised on beef and noodles. I was an army brat but my folks were originally farm kids from Northern Missouri. Mom made hers with ground beef and egg noodles. Both were staples in any military commissary and cheap eats for a sergeant’s family of eight.

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  3. Mindy said on January 8, 2008 at 10:09 am

    The noodles my grandmother made were fabulous. She made them from ten eggs and very little flour, rolled the dough so thin that small type could be easily read through it, allowed it to dry, and then sliced them hairline thin with a very sharp knife. Then they went into a broth that was made from both chicken and beef. To die for. Years ago we drove home for Thanksgiving all the way from Florida after hearing that Grandma spent a week making her beloved noodles to feed forty people.

    She told me once that serving chicken or beef and noodles in a rich broth over mashed potatoes was a way of satisfying everyone’s hunger for lots of meat. It had the taste of a meaty mouthful and was very filling because of the potatoes. One chicken or a cheap cut of beef could serve everyone that way. Then they went out to do real work and burned off all those calories.

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  4. brian stouder said on January 8, 2008 at 10:15 am

    I have to admit, I feel sorry for Hilary, and it has nothing to do with the tears.

    Hillary isn’t stuck for any of those reasons, in my opinion – unless you believe America is incapable of voting for a woman (something which has been proven untrue at every level, up to [but not yet including] the presidency)

    HRC has been running a good campaign; especially noteworthy since she carries the Clinton surname, and is therefore a sort of quasi-incumbent in this “gimme someone new” national political environment. She certainly could defeat any of the GOP guys that might emerge.

    If I felt sorry for her, it would be because 2008 seems to be an excellent chance for her – maybe the best she’ll ever see (free of incumbents, not including her!), and she finds herself between Barack and a hard place.

    After tonight, if Barack remains on a roll (so to speak), she has to face the prospect of hoping for a better-than-good Super Tuesday, and then the further task of both overcoming Barack in a protracted struggle, while not turning off all those waves of good will and energy that Obama has catalyzed.

    Looks like Mission:Impossible, to me…

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  5. Dorothy said on January 8, 2008 at 10:15 am

    I make homemade noodles but put them in chicken soup. I use my pizza cutter to slice the dough into strips, and leave them drying all over the kitchen.

    I ordered chicken & noodles a couple months ago at a diner here, and was astonished to see them (for my first time) piled on top of mashed potatoes drowning in gravy. It was tasty, but I’ll never do that again. I burned off the calories taking Augie on long walks the next few days.

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  6. jcburns said on January 8, 2008 at 10:20 am

    ‘Pwned’ (or ‘Pwn’) was one of 16 words to appear on the 2007 “List of Words and Phrases Banished from the Queen’s English for Mis-use, Over-use and General Uselessness,” released annually by Lake Superior State University.

    Word! (And how can you argue with an institution that heralds the name of the great lake which looks like a wolf’s head?)

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  7. alex said on January 8, 2008 at 10:21 am

    Tried the vaunted Amish version at Das Essen Platz or whatever that place is in Middlebury. Was there for a conference last spring. The level of sodium in that shit was so high that I almost needed hospitalization for rehydration.

    And speaking of the Allen County Public Libary’s photo archive, I was surprised to find my mom and dad’s house in it: http://contentdm.acpl.lib.in.us/cdm4/item_viewer.php?CISOROOT=/coll10&CISOPTR=143&REC=2

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  8. colleen said on January 8, 2008 at 10:45 am

    Agh. I have wasted many hours looking at those photos at the ACPL site.

    I liked HRC’s showing of emotion. Made her seem more human to me. Like a real person who cares, not just a political animal.

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  9. Sue said on January 8, 2008 at 11:11 am

    Chicago Tribune’s political blog noted the “Iron My Shirt” guys who showed up at Hil’s latest. Many of the commenters insisted that HRC had planted them herself. (Apparently they were sent in by some shock radio program, details still being sorted out.)

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  10. nancy said on January 8, 2008 at 11:39 am

    Dorothy, please send me a current e-mail. Mindy’s trying to reach you, and says no one’s answering at your hotmail account.

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  11. Julie Robinson said on January 8, 2008 at 12:19 pm

    Alex, your parents are privileged to live surrounded by such beauty. This is one of the reasons I will never be a city girl–gotta have the flora and fauna or I’m claustrophobic.

    My farmer grandparents in Illinois and Iowa never served any dishes like beef and noodles over mashed potatoes over white bread. I had to move to Indiana.

    It’s the kind of food my husband grew up with, and he was one of 10 kids. I think Mindy is right by saying it was used to stretch meat. He would love it if I made this today, along with another of his childhood staples, Spanish Rice. Blech to both.

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  12. nancy said on January 8, 2008 at 12:24 pm

    Alan’s mom made Spanish rice, although there was nothing Spanish about it: Ground beef, a little onion, tomato sauce and bake it all with some raw rice until rice is done. I think her recipe calls for “couple shakes chili powder.” That’s country livin’.

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  13. Peter said on January 8, 2008 at 12:35 pm

    Being an urbanite, we had the upscale version of beef and noodles – Hamburger Helper. I don’t know if they changed the formula or if my taste buds and nose have changed that much, but I remember salivating and anticipating that stuff as a kid and when we try it now it smells and looks like Spam that’s sat out in the sun for a few days. And no, my Mom didn’t put any secret ingredients in the HH to make it taste better, so I have to rule that out.

    You know, I liked what I saw of Hillary yesterday. She has been crapped on, and how much of it is really due to her – I mean, Obama’s from the state next door, and isn’t that what Mitt’s counting on in NH to rack up points? And I know she married Bill out of free will, but really, how much grief does she deserve for that? Sure, Ed Muskie did that in ’72 and cried himself out of politics, but that was back in the day.

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  14. beb said on January 8, 2008 at 1:02 pm

    beef and noodles. Oh, God, but I love that stuff. Anyone who thinks that smells like doof food is either feeding their dogs too well, or hasn’t tasted beef in years. Of course it’s horribly fattening but if we judged all foods by that criteria there would be no cheesecake, pecan pie or lasagna.

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  15. brian stouder said on January 8, 2008 at 1:26 pm

    And another political note – anybody who didn’t know why Keith Olbermann rubs some people the wrong way should have seen that guy’s show last night.

    It was noted hereabouts how harsh Chris Matthews was toward HRC after Iowa – but he was just the warm-up act for Fair-Weather Friend Olbermann! Good God!! KO was comparing HRC to Cheney last night! And he was impugning her intelligence and her honesty (with regard to Senator Clinton’s response to Obama’s reference to Martin Luther King and the advancement of Civil Rights in the ’60’s)

    And as a post script, Olbermann also cheered a bit of street mob action, while gleefully playing tape of a bunch hooligans with Ron Paul signs chasing after Sean Hannity. One can only imagine how vexed Olbermann’s cave-man brows and faux moralism would have been, if a similar street mob chased after HIM, or some Paul Krugman-type.

    Leaving that aside, I was genuinely taken aback by Olbermann’s “shoot the wounded” approach to Hillary Clinton…granted, that guy isn’t a favorite of mine – but I thought he was a better man than that.

    But, wrong again!

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  16. Dorothy said on January 8, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    My bad, Nancy. I rarely check that hotmail account these days. Maybe once a week. I’ll go there now!

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  17. harry near indy said on January 8, 2008 at 2:17 pm

    nance, iirc, the smoking gun posted an arrest report by the slidell louisiana p.d., citing a couple for screwing on the town’s water tower.

    the police chief said that happened a lot. “it’s our version of the mile high club,” he said.

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  18. basset said on January 8, 2008 at 2:24 pm

    there’s a giant statue of Superman in front of the courthouse in Metropolis, Illinois… and I’ve heard it’s not unusual for couples to disappear into the bushes behind it.

    last time I was up there I was just disappointed I couldn’t find a tenderloin sandwich, here in Tenn. nobody knows what they are.

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  19. joodyb said on January 8, 2008 at 3:22 pm

    i grew up amidst amish settlements – wonderful restaurants (mennonite) adapted the most beloved of those foods. pies. oh the pies. there were multi-starch courses, nor in my welsh/scots-irish family’s farm cooking (and those women could stretch a chuck roast). bread at every meal, sure, and all manner of dairy accompaniment. i wonder if this multi-carb tradition might have roots in a pioneer solution to feeding everyone and getting passels of kids to sleep at night. it seems more prevalent in the breadbasket states.

    mmm, tenderloin. the best of junk food on the road. we don’t find those in MN either. have to get all the way to IN to find them on menus. i get all misty thinking of Elby’s and Frisch’s.

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  20. MaryC said on January 8, 2008 at 3:33 pm

    “Vile stuff”, “dog-food aroma”, the whole snarky tone … anyone else besides me hope that the in-laws somehow come across this message board and recognise their snippy DIL? And serve her with real dog food at the next family dinner?

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  21. alex said on January 8, 2008 at 3:39 pm

    I used to love tenderloins too, especially slathered in pickles and mayo. Then I learned what hyperlipidemic B.O. is — besides a dead ringer for tenderloin’s familiar fragrance — and now just can’t stomach the stuff.

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  22. michaelj said on January 8, 2008 at 7:22 pm

    There’s no place but one where pasta should meet potatoes, minestrone.

    Regarding my opinions about Roger Clemens and the obvious racial divide: he taped a private phone conversation without telling his corespondent he was taping it. Unless there’s some signing statement of which I’m not aware, this is a direct violation of federal eavesdropping laws. And if this didn’t amount to suborning

    a potential witness, by threat of force and other extortion, I’m Greta Van Susteren, before or after the fair and balanced makeover. But he get’s the benefit of the doubt? Because he’s not a jerk? Barry never dreamed of being such a monsstrous jerk.

    Actually, when Roger says he didn’t play his career for the Hall of Fame? Well, I believe he’s done idt for the cash, so I guess he doesn’t lie all the time. Piazza is a surefire Haller. No catcher ever hit like that. His caught-stealing is qestionable, but anybody knows anything about baseball would know Nomo’s delivery would make things impossible. So Clemens’ assaults by intentional beanball and throwing the bat shards is almost inexplicable. Well, there’s roid rage.

    I apologize for bringing this up again, but this jerk questioned my commitments to my beliefs, my knowledge and racial equlity in the face of a bunch of decent people whose opinion I think is kinda valuable. You know, the utterly estimable Randy Newman, who I think is a son of the Middlewrs had a comment on this sort of garbage in the song Mr. Sheep. That would be Jesus, what a jerk. I may not be black, but I just might strike a match for freedom myself.

    On the subject of steroids, he’s incredibly ignorant, and he was exceptionally insulting on the subject of race.

    So anyway, cooking. Potatoes are the ultimate, actually perfect, thickening agent that doesn’t involve just cooking for hours and hours. You can’t make chowder without redskins, in my opinion. Maybe this is my unadulterated Irishness. The potato is the perfect food. But it does better on it’s own with condiments and bacon bits, odr sliced up pepperoni.

    Let me ask you this;’ You all think ifyou jack steroids you get dytong, zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzznoy om s nbillion yrstd

    And I graduated from the Henry Grady School of Journalism. What I loved more than anything was the newspaper room, where we had the Louisville and Sacramento papers when they were awe-inspiring. Nancy might be able to enlighten y’all about Henry Grady. Ralph McGill risked his life, and so did Reg Murphy. And there were Crawford Long and Henry W. Grady. I think these were all white guys lacking white guilt. Jesus, what a jerk.

    Sorry for these preoccupations. I graduated from a Southern school, but I was around Boston for Louise Daye Hicks. It’s kind of amazing that Manifest Destiny in all of its manifest ugliness isn’t the mortal stain, but it’s slavery. Of course now it’s the willingness to commit torture, and run secret prisons. Not my values. Not my country.

    If you think the voter suppression and fraud in Volusia County, and Diebold’s CEO vowing W would win ’04 in Sanduskuy County no matter what it takes If you’re so teisted you think Kerry was a traitor rather than a hero. Buy that, W. Horseshit. It’s not a willing suspension of disbelief, it’s a willing suspension of reality. Dodging the draft in ’68 wasn’t cowardice, it was intelligence. Unless you were just a chickenshit.

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  23. michaelj said on January 8, 2008 at 7:26 pm

    If you think you use steroids, you get strong? Man, I’ve beentaken to the cleaners,Jammed once and for all.

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  24. michaelj said on January 8, 2008 at 7:43 pm

    Buy what? What Terroir Blues? The rest of what anybody says. This is so good its ridiculous

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  25. Danny said on January 8, 2008 at 10:22 pm

    michaelj, I guess you are calling me the jerk, but it is hard to decipher your meaning because in typical fashion, when you believe yourself to be on a roll, you tend to write in stream-of-unconsciousness.

    Anyway, I’m going to take one last try at breaking this down for you to understand my point(s). Do with this what you will. Your kinda being an asshole (though no big deal, we all have our moments, including moi).

    1. Barry Bonds undoubtedly took steroids. No reasonable person could question this. The Game of Shadows lays it all out very nicely with what almost everyone (but you and his momma) considers to be substantive evidence.

    2. I’m pretty sure that we will also find out that Clemens cheated too by taking steroids. But it is WAY Way way too early for anyone to be talking about a racial divide here. We just found out about Clemens from the Mitchell report a few weeks ago whereas we’ve had years to stew on Bond’s trangressions. Time will tell if the powers that be treat Clemens in like manner. Only then can any argument be made about a racial divide with respect to Clemens v. Barry. Is there a racial divide? Undoubtedly. Just not here yet.

    3. Barry Bonds is undoubtedly one of the top tree baseball players of all time. Period. Cheating tarnished that. He didn’t need to cheat to be a Haller. He did it because he was jealous of other cheaters like MacGuire and Sosa. Too bad. A pox on all of them.

    4. All of the arguments you make about steroids increasing length of career or ability to recover faster from fatigue and injuries applies to all of these players. So when you to cherry-pick to exclude Bonds, it makes no sense. In fact, the only reason that we are disucssing Bonds and not all of the other cheaters like MacGuire is that you singled him out for sainthood. So all of this is your fault.

    5. And lastly, I have never made the argument that steroids “makes you a hitter.” You keep repeating this like it is my argument. It is not. I said all of this months ago when we first had this topic, but I guess you ignored it then too. Here goes one last time. Bonds is a pure hitter and the juice didn’t help that. What the juice did for him was enhance his bat speed. Thus he could take a longer look at a ball, enhancing his ability to judge a good pitch, and once he hit it, through the wonderous mechanics of elastic collisions, it went further. Balls that may have not been home runs for pre-steriod-Bonds were now sailing out of the freakin’ stadium.

    Whew. Ok. /rant.

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  26. Laura said on January 8, 2008 at 11:17 pm

    Fighting? Boys! There’s no fighting in nn.com.

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  27. brian stouder said on January 8, 2008 at 11:35 pm

    I’m pretty sure that we will also find out that Clemens cheated too by taking steroids. But it is WAY Way way too early for anyone to be talking about a racial divide here. We just found out about Clemens from the Mitchell report a few weeks ago whereas we’ve had years to stew on Bond’s trangressions.

    And years of passes for Mark Maguire and Jose Canseco.

    If baseball takes away Maguire’s 70 home run season – puts asterisks next to all of them – then I’d agree that Bonds isn’t being singled out.

    Or – if Clemens really does man-up, and go under oath and testify (under threat of perjury) about what he did (or did not) ingest/inject/infuse – THEN I’ll accept that Bonds isn’t being singled out for black marks on his record, owing to his being conveniently black

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  28. brian stouder said on January 8, 2008 at 11:36 pm

    Fighting? Boys! There’s no fighting in nn.com.

    one of the best lines in Dr Strangelove – “Gentleman! No fighting in the War Room!”

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  29. brian stouder said on January 8, 2008 at 11:46 pm

    One last note – I think I LOVE those cantankerous voters in New Hampshire!

    They defied the pollsters magnificently!!

    Seriously, the United States Presidential Election of 2008 looks like it is destined to be one for the history books – the most interesting and truly ‘open’ national decision (or direction change) of our lifetimes; no “course correction” or “staying the course” or legacy building, or foregone conclusion….but a real, deep-down, soul searching, wide ranging choice.

    I heard that the last presidential election that had NO incumbent president and or vice president was in….1928.

    This opportunity really won’t come again, for us. I’m finding it to be exquisitely interesting, and altogether compelling.

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  30. michaelj said on January 9, 2008 at 12:08 am

    There’s no fighting in nn.com.. Why not? Bandwidth? None of this had to do with records. That’s just stupid. Only time I ever thought I was on a roll was somewhere around 1500 yards in a 1750 season. People that dislike this woman want to talk about her nearly perfect plan for providing health care to almost every American. Why are there Americans that don’t think Americans should have health care, and if if a woman proposed it it’s particularly odious? Give me a Godamm break, you troglodytes, aholes. Jesus what a jerk.

    What I think is if you flat-out lie, they ought to kick your ass out. Anybody claiming Roger is telling the truth, they’re making Barry look like a big-time truth-teller. Anybody that instinctively believes Roger is telling truth does so because he’s white. Fact, jack. And he’s a major league liar.

    I seriously doubt it’s ever been convenient for Barry to be black. If you’ve the unmitigated gall and the racist intent to actually claim this, you’re a racist pig that obviously hates Bonds because of his skin color. Why not just admit it? You might feel better?

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  31. Danny said on January 9, 2008 at 8:27 am

    …You might feel better?..hiccup….

    ????

    (blank stare, crickets chirping)

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  32. Jim said on January 9, 2008 at 9:03 am

    In our house, beef-and-noodles was a great way to use up the leftover roast beef from Sunday’s dinner. Having lived around the country, I am always fascinated by the differences in regional food. For example, in the North, “barbecue” is a verb — something you do to food (barbecued chicken, etc.) In the South, it’s a noun — “Let’s go get some barbecue.”

    As to Senator Clinton, I liked what Maureen Dowd said about her in today’s NYT:

    “There was a poignancy about the moment, seeing Hillary crack with exhaustion from decades of yearning to be the principal rather than the plus-one. But there was a whiff of Nixonian self-pity about her choking up. What was moving her so deeply was her recognition that the country was failing to grasp how much it needs her. In a weirdly narcissistic way, she was crying for us. But it was grimly typical of her that what finally made her break down was the prospect of losing.”

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  33. michael heaton said on January 9, 2008 at 9:14 am

    you make me laugh so hard
    so early in the morning
    i’ve written reams of “important” journalism
    people remember the two or three recipes most
    pesto pizza
    roasted potatos
    pulled pork

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  34. john c said on January 9, 2008 at 9:43 am

    Sammy Sosa has gotten a pass on steroids. And Pete Rose didn’t get a pass on gambling … went to prison for it, as I recall. Or at least for tax evasion. And unlike Bonds (and Clemens), there is no evidence, nor has there ever been, that Rose cheated at baseball. (there is ample evidence that he is a tool, but that’s not prosecutable.) Only that he bet on it.
    Last time I checked, Sosa’s black and Rose is white.
    Also, it seems to me that the Rocket is very much on his way to NOT getting a pass. Every time he opens his mouth he convinces more people he’s guilty. And as I matched up his career stats with the Mitchell Report, it became clear that he might not have gotten 300 wins without juice.
    And the argument that roids don’t make you a better hitter is pure, unadulterated malarkey. They can’t make you hit. But they can make you hit better. Anything that speeds your bat makes you a better hitter. Former fly balls are now homers. Former grounders to short are now hit hard enough to get through the hole. Former fast balls blown by you are now tagged, or at least fouled off.
    Race plays a role in everything and I’m sure it has affected Barry’s situation. But he is still a pathetic cheater as, I’m pretty sure, is Clemens.

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  35. brian stouder said on January 9, 2008 at 10:32 am

    And unlike Bonds (and Clemens), there is no evidence, nor has there ever been, that Rose cheated at baseball.

    Depends what specifically constitutes cheating. I was a huge, huge Pete Rose fan. In the ’70’s, if Cincy was your team, then you loved Pete Rose; and Cincy was always my team.

    But when I learned that he bet on baseball while he was a manager, that was it, goodnight, good luck, come back when you can’t stay so long.

    He said he never bet against his own team (and therefore didn’t overtly “throw” games) – but he did bet ON his own team – but not ALWAYS! So – as a fan – one wonders. If he has $15,000 bet on his team for tomorrow’s game, but not today’s – how deeply will he go into the bullpen, today? Or reverse the example….sounds like an unforgiveable breach of faith, and an assault on the integrity of the game.

    I WILL give Pete credit for a great point, though. When he was minimizing his gambling problem, he asked why the NEWSPAPERS publish gambling over-under lines every day? Why don’t they also print the phone numbers of all the best prostitutes in town, too? he asked

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  36. Peter said on January 9, 2008 at 10:43 am

    Oy, I can’t believe we went from Beef and Noodles to Noodleheads like Clemens and Pete Rose.

    My two cents – It is well known that MLB had ironclad evidence against Mr. Rose, and they made a deal that Pete would go quietly away and forget the HOF and MLB wouldn’t trash him. This is no different than what happens at any company when someone is caught and it would make everyone look bad.

    Of course, Pete never did anything quietly, so it’s no surprise that he’s bitched ever since.

    Someone on Chicago radio said it best yesterday – what is it with West Texas men? Roger Clemens, George Bush, Lovie Smith (local reference), they just think they can strut up, shovel out the BS, and think we’ll believe them. Is it the water? The cactus? What?

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  37. michaelj said on January 9, 2008 at 10:52 am

    Pete broke the law, and there was no position on the field at which his ineptitude could be hidden. Maybe he belongs in the HOF of baseball, but only as the inspiration for the designated hitter position. Bad infielder, woeful outfielder, ludicrous first baseman. Meanwhile, Goose goes in, Jim Ed doesn’t, Hillary rules, and nobody even considers Freddy Lynn, who was a better ballplayer than all of them put together.

    Weren’t Hillary’s speech and Barrack’s concession enough to put Republicanism to bed permanently. Not Bobby, but it’s encouraging to see there’s some there there. I’d love to see how the two comments are rendered in PowerPoint in today’s Presidential Brief. And the look on W’s face as he tries to figure out where it all went wrong.

    Far as I know, Sammy didn’t break any laws. Of course, far as juries of his peers are concerned, neither did OJ Simpson. Neither did Detective Fuhrman. Selective prosecution and conviction in the Court of Public Opinion seem to be an unfortunately enduring aspect of the great American experiment in democracy, which, of course is barely a Republic, and more like monarchy, what with signing statements and illegal pocket vetoes and all.

    Does the USA have a Runnymede? Right in our backyard, here in Hilton Head. Drag his sorry ass down here and he’ll get a fair trial before admitting to trashing the Constitution.

    These things are all connected. Bonds will be exonerated and everybody will still believe him guilty. If Clemens is so mind-numbed by injections he lies under oath to Congress, he’ll probably get away with that, too. And Mark Fainaru-Wada, the astoundingly slovenly alleged journalist, won’t ever be prosecuted for quite obviously breaking the law to make a slew of cash. If only Mark Twain and HL Mencken were here to comment on the grand nature of American Democracy in action. That would be some kinda web log.

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  38. JGW said on January 9, 2008 at 10:54 am

    I’d never had beef and noodles until I moved back here two years ago from N.J. I still don’t get the concept of serving it over mashed potatoes but that is the local preference. I opt out on the spuds.
    That being said it’s an awesome and easy family meal on a cold rainy or snowy night and I do keep a can or two of beef around for those type of occaisons. I guess I can kiss my reputation as a foodie away and forget I ever wrote a food column or owned a gourmet Italian deli.
    I don’t make my own noodles, I but the Das Essenhaus Amish “style” noodles that are sold everywhere here. This meal has Rachael Ray beat as it can be ready in 15-20 minutes. I add a salad for some variety and fresh vegetables.
    I learned something interesting about the canned beef. It’s got a huge following from people who own sailboats or long range cruiser yachts. I guess if you’re 600 miles from the nearest landfall and have limited resources the meat brightens up a lot of meals.
    Another popular yacht food is canned cheese from the creamery at Washington State University, their Cougar Gold rates high on a lot of food boards.
    http://www.wsu.edu/creamery/index.html

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  39. michaelj said on January 9, 2008 at 10:59 am

    What exactly is potted meat as opposed to canned? Or spam? How is this subfood group related to scrapple, and to head cheese? It would take more than sixteen slugs from a thirty aught six to get me to taste test any of this stuff. Who eats this offal anyway?

    Now, Slim Jims are a whole ‘nother story. Upton Sinclair, in his dreams.

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  40. brian stouder said on January 9, 2008 at 11:11 am

    I confess it suprised me the first time I learned that beef and noodles over cream cheese mashed potatoes was an Indiana thing, and not a universal thing!

    Of course, this means that all those tv commercials urging Hoosiers to eat fewer doughnuts at the office, and take the stairs, and jog or exercise – and starring Governor Mitch in every other scene – are NOT simply free campaign ads (as I had thought) for our athletic incumbent, but instead timely and well-justified public service announcements from our genuinely concerned (and physically fit) Man on a Mission, Mitch Daniels!

    Once again, I was wrong

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  41. Laura said on January 9, 2008 at 2:12 pm

    Brian:

    I forgot about Dr. Strangelove. I was (awkwardly) referencing A League of Their Own: “There’s no crying in baseball.” Please read my mind from now on.

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  42. Danny said on January 9, 2008 at 2:33 pm

    Wow, I thought you were referencing Dr. Stragelove too. Great flick and also my favorite quote.

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  43. Diana said on January 11, 2008 at 6:47 pm

    OMG, Indiana-style beef and noodles. I thought I was the only one who was subjected to that glop growing up. It did serve its intended purpose, though: feeding a whole mess o’ Hoosiers and getting them off to sleep. And yeah, I had to fight hard not to develop that jelly-bean body shape like the rest of my family.
    Now that I’m all growed up and living on the eastside of Detroit like you, I almost want my mom to make me some – just to see if it’s gotten any better over the years.

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