Thanks, Ted.

Dear Mr. Nugent:

Please come back to Michigan and help clean up the mess you are partially responsible for making.

Then go home to Texas.



Posted at 11:33 am in Uncategorized |

27 responses to “Thanks, Ted.”

  1. Gasman said on September 15, 2008 at 12:08 pm

    As a vegetarian, I am obviously not a hunter. That said, I do understand the need for hunters as we have essentially eliminated the natural predators from most ecosystems. Ted Nugent, however, is one crazed nut job. He is living in a blood soaked orgy of killing and death. He seems to wax absolutely orgasmic over the thought of killing for the sake of killing. He delights in the suffering of his prey and in sharing his sadistic murderous fantasies with paying customers. This has nothing to do with managing wildlife populations or putting meat on the table. This is deviant behavior that should cause outrage. It should be noted that torture of animals is a common behavior that has preceded most mass murderers’ attacks on people. Ted Nugent represents the kind of base cruelty that humans are capable of. Makes me want to run out and join the NRA.

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  2. nancy said on September 15, 2008 at 12:12 pm

    I have no particular problem with hunting, and I suspect 99 percent of Nugent’s gas emissions are just hot air that sells well to the feebs who buy it. But canned hunting is chickenshit to the bone, and the idea that this somehow couldn’t have been foreseen is laughable. I mean, they’re pigs. Pigs are the best diggers in the world. Did it never occur to one of these moron gamekeepers that one might root out under a fence?

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  3. coozledad said on September 15, 2008 at 12:28 pm

    We have had as many as four spayed and neutered pot-bellied pig rescues, because of the trash that farms them for pet sales. They are enormously destructive and viciously intelligent. They are the animal that reminds me most of humans- incredibly adept at making use of the path of least resistance and incompatible with the natural environment.
    Ted and his canned hunt buddies could conceivably be levied damages by the state, or you might want to look into a class action lawsuit. I always thought he deserved one for his reptilian guitar drool alone.
    A lot of the the jug-eared sisterbonkers (or is it the dyslexic sploogebubbles?) down here have a habit of repeating the fallacy that coyotes were introduced by “unimal rights activisss”. The North Carolina Wildlife Commission has a different take: They were imported so a few lazy-eyed idiots could hunt something that looked like a dog. Fortunately, they drag a few of them out of the woods every year on their back, after they’ve mistaken one another for a deer or a beercan.

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  4. Danny said on September 15, 2008 at 12:43 pm

    Pink Floyd’s Richard Wright is dead at 65.

    RIP, Richard. You were very special to me.

    How sad. First Syd last summer, now Richard.

    First linkage:,2933,422764,00.html

    Makes me sad to hear that Pink Floyd was initially name Sigma 6. Too close to that vapid management quality cult.

    EDIT: God, I’m sad about this. I was just watching the DVD of the 30th Anniversary Making of Dark Side of the Moon a few weeks back. One of my favorite parts is where Richard is explaining the jazz chord progression he remembered and used when writing “Great Gig in the Sky.”

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  5. alex said on September 15, 2008 at 1:30 pm

    Speaking of you-know-what, a piece in the Sun-Times this date is counseling a more subtle shade of lipstick and less gloss.

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  6. Kirk said on September 15, 2008 at 1:32 pm

    That is bad news, Danny. Wright’s work had a huge role in making the band what it was. I’m a long-time fan. Makes me sad.

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  7. caliban said on September 15, 2008 at 1:45 pm

    Paul Theroux’ take on Thoreau’s disgust with moose hunters:,0,1809784.story?track=ntothtml

    In the actuality, people don’t hunt Bullwinkle, they just gun him down.

    (Man, that possessive looks strange, but I swear it’s correct.)

    Regarding Mr. Nugent’s claims to have never ingested drugs—Ha, Ha, Ha. I saw him.

    The great moose-skinner seems to have made a serious error in blithely quoting the McCarthyite psychopath Westwood Pegler. You can lead the governor to the teleprompter, but you can’t make her think:,0,1809784.story?track=ntothtml

    Some commenter on this Huffpost actually asks if this is really more outrageous than Reverend Wright Gutdomming America. Well, yeah.

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  8. brian stouder said on September 15, 2008 at 1:49 pm

    Speaking of you-know-what, a piece in the Sun-Times this date is counseling a more subtle shade of lipstick

    Hahahahahaha!!! Now THAT was an artful way to stay on-topic and still talk about….you-know-what!

    I read this article at lunchtime, and laughed out loud,9171,1834674,00.html

    an excerpt:

    In the book world, a surprise hit this year has been Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure. The book, which features entries culled from more than 25,000 submissions on begins with children’s advocate Robin Templeton’s “After Harvard, had baby with crackhead” and includes superchef Mario Batali’s “Brought it to a boil often.”

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  9. caliban said on September 15, 2008 at 2:01 pm

    I don’t suppose anybody’s got time for all 1070-something pages of “Infinite Jest” today, but here’s a David Foster Wallace Atlantic artricle that comes in under 10 pp. (He left out the footnotes in favor of an inspired, color-coded interactive alternative, so the digressions are less lengthy.)

    It’s an interestingly skewed commentary on what passes for American political discourse in dark times.

    “Infinite Jest” is worth the effort, for readers that have read “Gravity’s Rainbow” at least twice.

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  10. brian stouder said on September 15, 2008 at 5:00 pm

    Say, you know the saying “If you talk the talk, you gotta walk the walk”?

    Well, this story kind of turns that one sideways (or horizontal)

    The opening two sentences:

    The way a woman walks might be giving away a lot more about her than she knows, a new study says. “Gait may be associated with orgasmic ability,” is the title of a study appearing in the September issue of the Journal of Sexual Medicine.”

    But the passage that made me scratch my head (so to speak):

    In order to test a theory linking blocked muscles to sexual function, researchers from the Catholic University of Louvain in Belgium and the University of West Scotland in Paisley asked students to complete questionnaires on their sexual behavior.

    Hahahahahahahaha!!! As we all learned long ago, Billy Joel was WRONG about Cathloic girls

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  11. coozledad said on September 15, 2008 at 5:10 pm

    The only muscles I know of that are critical to female orgasm are the ones in her middle finger. They are also, strangely, directly linked (by super string, as some speculate) to the ego of her partner.
    On a slightly related note:

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  12. moe99 said on September 15, 2008 at 5:24 pm

    More humor for the day: Hockey moms against Sarah Palin:

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  13. Danny said on September 15, 2008 at 5:43 pm

    Anyone catch SNL this weekend? I recorded it. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler were great. Sarah Palin remarked that she thought the skit was funny too and that it was especially so because one year she had dressed up for Halloween as Tina Fey.

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  14. moe99 said on September 15, 2008 at 6:23 pm

    Danny, that’s not the official McCain campaign position:

    they need to get their stories straight.

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  15. Hattie said on September 15, 2008 at 7:22 pm

    Get the pig hunters and pig dogs out there. Even if you don’t like hunting, and I don’t, there is no more destructive (and fecund)creature on the face of the earth, except, of course, for man.

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  16. Dexter said on September 15, 2008 at 8:54 pm

    Three years Ian Frazier wrote a masterful article in The New Yorker about today’s topic, Sus Scrofa…the link is an archived abstract:

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  17. Dexter said on September 15, 2008 at 8:58 pm

    I was reared in rural Indiana, and the most frightened I ever became was when I quite accidentally flushed a covey of quail.
    DAMN!! My heart almost stopped from the commotion.

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  18. beb said on September 15, 2008 at 9:53 pm

    Sarah Palin remarked that she thought the skit was funny

    Of course she had to say that. She was flying in a plane full of reporters, who were watching the skit. They were laughing. Reports are that the upper cabin (where Palin ride) wasn’t so laugh-filled. But obviously to complain about SNL demeaning her, why that would be whining. Can”t have a VP candidate who whines.

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  19. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on September 15, 2008 at 10:01 pm

    Interestingly, Harpers ran a piece after 2004 showing a tight correlation between counties that saw high participation rates in pig hunting, and Bush support. You could be geekily didactic and say it shows the relationship between population density and voting patterns, or you could go all snarky and say . . .

    Being a geek at heart, i would say that the tendency is for folks who like to live in unincorporated areas and out away from close neighbors to prefer less and smaller government, while vertically stacked and closer-in residents see a stronger value in vigorous governmental regulation and management, not to mention safety nets. But if i remember the Harpers piece correctly, it is a bit amusingly ironic that of all the possible crosstab correlations, pig hunting gave you the best index of counties that voted Dubya.

    My most heart-stopping moment was a Great Blue Heron going from stock-still stick three feet from my canoe all unnoticed, to seven foot wingspan snapped out and boomed into an initial downstroke in the blink of an eye, throwing a gust of decaying swamp and rotting fish guts past my upthrown arms, thrashing twice more to rise above the trees around us.

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  20. basset said on September 15, 2008 at 11:02 pm

    I thought Pink Floyd was first called “The Architectural Abdabs”… could be wrong, maybe it was a band one of them was in before Floyd.

    Nugent… first published work I ever did for money was an interview with him that I sold to CREEM back in college, looooong time ago.

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  21. MaryC said on September 16, 2008 at 12:23 am

    CREEM! I think I first heard of Ted Nugent from a CREEM article — maybe it was yours, basset. Funny, he didn’t seem like such an asshole back then. Was I wrong?

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  22. basset said on September 16, 2008 at 8:31 am

    might have been mine, was there a picture of a road cut in Martin County with “Amboy Dukes” painted on it?

    I couldn’t tell, really, even the best interviewers can’t always get to the real person and I was just a kid, haven’t talked to him since then.

    my take, based on comments from people I’ve worked with who have also worked with him, is that he’s a smart guy who really believes all that stuff and all that over the top act is just part of the brand.

    that said… I was at a hunting lodge a couple years ago not long after he’d done a hunt there and the guides said that when everyone met to socialize in the evenings he just would not shut up and one of them finally told him off in front of everyone.

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  23. Hattie said on September 16, 2008 at 4:08 pm

    Well, the Hawaii pighunters don’t vote.

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  24. MaryC said on September 16, 2008 at 4:20 pm

    Too long ago to remember the illustration, sorry. But I did have the impression at the time that Ted’s tongue was in his cheek. I see a glimpse of him from time to time when I surf past the Glenn Beck show and I like to think that he knows he’s bullshitting ol’ Glenn.

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  25. basset said on September 16, 2008 at 10:59 pm

    could be… can’t stand to watch Glenn Beck long enough to have a good opinion.

    meanwhile, I got a junk mail letter from Sarah Palin today promoting Alaska tourism… we went up there a few years ago, had a huge time and have wanted to go back ever since, keeping up with the various attractions up there has gotten us on some mailing lists.

    think I will send in the form to get the free day planner and see if it comes with her name on it… or write “Obama voter” across it and see if I get it at all…

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  26. brian stouder said on September 16, 2008 at 11:38 pm

    or write “Obama voter” across it and see if I get it at all…

    Sorry, bassett. From what I have read, you can only be either 100% FOR Palin, or else you’re a “hater”.

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  27. basset said on September 17, 2008 at 12:06 am

    guess I don’t get to go salmon fishing on the Kenai any more, then… nothing quite like landing one, whipping out your knife and improvising a little sashimi while you’re still standing in the water. that and some roe from the same fish, mmmm-good.

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