Sorry for the nothing-so-far. The morning started busy, got busier, and as we’ve now passed the magic threshold of noon, it looks like we’ve officially put today in the Fail column.

Do I have anything to report? Not much. Do I have any tasty linkage to follow? I have a little:

Via J.C. Burns’ Twitter, the fabulous Oatmeal guides to grammar and usage. The one on “literally” made me laugh out loud. Literally.

So did this: The 10 most insulting things Anthony Bourdain has said about the Food Network. Bonus: Frank Bruni weighs in. Because this stuff is really important.

Oh, get OUT: Moammar Gadhafi had the hots for Condi Rice? That now makes two men who’ve admitted to that particular…can we call it a kink? Noooo. (I won’t tell you who the other one is. He might be reading this.)

And let that be the end of today, eh? We’ll try for better tomorrow.

Posted at 1:15 pm in Same ol' same ol' |

41 responses to “Oops.”

  1. Judybusy said on August 25, 2011 at 1:38 pm

    Ugh! Word usage.I am reading an otherwise fine book about Cesare Borgia, Machiavelli and Da Vinci in which the author constantly misuses “liable”to mean “likely.” I don’t see how the editor missed it. He’s also overused the word and it’s been distracting. Ah, where would I be without my cranky quibbles?

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  2. MarkH said on August 25, 2011 at 1:39 pm

    That photo of Condi and the Colonel says a lot. He’s obviously looking forward to something, while she’s…not.

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  3. Dorothy said on August 25, 2011 at 1:44 pm

    Goodness am I loving the floors in Aisha Gadhafi’s house! But she can have the ugly mermaid couch. And another link at the Oatmeal site explains the top ten words we should stop misspelling right now. That should be required reading for everyone on Facebook. And I literally mean EVERYONE.

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  4. Julie Robinson said on August 25, 2011 at 2:21 pm

    I am literally in love with the Gayroller Tshirt, although it would be improved by some sparkles.

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  5. coozledad said on August 25, 2011 at 2:22 pm

    Maybe it was the Ferragamos, maybe it was the piano. Perhaps it was the discrete crescent-shaped punctures she gave me when she shook my hand, or the tiny droplet of blood that spilled onto my Ralph Lauren caftan when she leaned in and bit my face. Together, we could have ethnically cleansed Sudan. Alone, I’m just a bum with a bunch of second rate cold war hardware.

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  6. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 2:22 pm

    Bourdain comes across like Mr. Blackwell talking about Cher, i.e. prissy little weenie. I commute and shop by bike, and exercise regularly with resistance bands, take long ocean kayak treks, and play hoops twice a week. I could eat a Paula Deen dinner every day and not become obese. Would Bourdain feel better if Ms. Jolly Roly-Poly switched out butter for margarine, when he specializes in such thigh augmentation superfoods as duck confit and pate? What a horse’s ass. If someone wants a valid reason to attack Paula, it would be her Smithfield promotional connection. Union busting, OSHA-flouting, Big Farm, animal torturing, pollution meister agribusiness sucking on the government teat like nobody but the oil companies.

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  7. alex said on August 25, 2011 at 2:39 pm

    Good thing I didn’t literally pee myself, but the linkage today has me laughing so hard I just might.

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  8. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 2:45 pm

    Twenty things worth knowing about beer.

    Capybara with monkey.

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  9. Deborah said on August 25, 2011 at 3:08 pm

    Coozledad, I’d love to hear you say the things you write. I wish there was a way you could link to a recording of you speaking; I bet it’d be even better than reading it.

    I used a semi-colon, did I do it properly?

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  10. Sue said on August 25, 2011 at 3:27 pm

    You know, I’m willing to think that the Republican special prosecutor did her job when she came to this conclusion. I have no reason to believe that she’s a partisan and she was probably carefully chosen. What bugs me about this is that she came to this conclusion after reviewing the evidence which I assume includes interviews with all the other judges who witnessed this. All those people in the room, educated and trained to be clear-headed and observant, and there is not enough consensus on what everyone saw or chose to see to charge either justice.
    As far as Prosser’s behavior goes, we’ll probably see more of it and I would find it very amusing next time if Ann and Shirley just went Thelma and Louise on his ass. Why the hell not? If they’re goading and bullying the poor boy, just finish the job already.
    edit: Sarcasm, people! Don’t panic, I’m not advocating anything naughty.

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  11. coozledad said on August 25, 2011 at 3:32 pm

    Deborah: Just imagine Andy Griffith after he’s taken a couple of quaaludes for a bad head cold.
    Wikileaks has discovered Ghadafi and Phil Gramm were in negotiations to produce a couple of films back during the all too brief summer of love. Phil would have gotten Libyan oil backing for Big Eyed Beagle Bangeroo (targeted at the fur cabin Republicans), and Ghadafi was about to settle for Ru Paul for Condoleeza Hardcore Ecstasy.

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  12. Kirk said on August 25, 2011 at 3:44 pm

    Good semicolon, Deborah.

    And thanks for The Oatmeal, Nance. Sorry I had missed it until now.

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  13. John G. Wallace said on August 25, 2011 at 3:49 pm

    Fort Wayne Newspapers is reporting that Mike Dooley has died:


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  14. Dorothy said on August 25, 2011 at 3:54 pm

    Anyone have any loved ones in the path of Irene? I’m worried a little about my daughter in Norfolk. Not a whole lot I can do about it from here except fret out loud.

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  15. Julie Robinson said on August 25, 2011 at 4:12 pm

    I just read the Dooley news and audibly gasped. Only 65.

    Dorothy, we’ve also been following Irene, since my sister is in Lake Worth, Florida and lives only two blocks from the intracoastal. Mom has been fretting out loud, too, so I’ve been sending her good links when I find them. The Palm Beach Post has a good one–how about your daughter’s paper?

    John, you’re in Vero Beach, right? How are things there?

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  16. Dorothy said on August 25, 2011 at 4:20 pm

    Oh yes the Pilot has ever-changing information on their web page. The city of Norfolk is opening up a parking garage and allowing people who live downtown (and they do) to park their cars higher up for the weekend free of charge, if they desire. So Laura and her boyfriend are putting his new Honda on an upper level as a precaution. She is off Saturday but works Sunday so she could be getting to work after the worst of it hits. They have lots of canned food and bottled water in case they lose power. Like previous scares, if nothing much materializes they will donate what they don’t use to a food bank.

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  17. MarkH said on August 25, 2011 at 4:22 pm

    My older sister and her son both live on Maryland’s eastern shore and work in the DC area. If it’s not shaking earth, it’s high winds and rain.

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  18. Little Bird said on August 25, 2011 at 5:05 pm

    I want to send the gayroller shirt to a friend. And one for myself; to wear to family functions.
    (I never know if I use those properly, but I tend to speak with lots of pauses so maybe I should be using more of them)

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  19. Sue said on August 25, 2011 at 5:25 pm

    (comic #1 perfectly describes a typical FIB reaction to a common Wisconsinite driving habit)

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  20. Jolene said on August 25, 2011 at 5:35 pm

    Here, the big thing is the dedication of the new MLK monument. The main event, complete w/ presidential speech, is at 11 AM ET on Sunday (to be televised if you interested). Right now, they’re saying they’ll proceed according to schedule, as the rain is expected to have ended by then, but they have the option of holding it a couple of hours later. They were expecting a couple of hundred thousand people, so there’d be lots of disappointed folks if things get tangled up.

    They’ve already had to move two of the related events due to earthquake damage–a dinner that was to have been held at the National Building Museum and an interfaith service that was to have been held at the National Cathedral, which, I gather, sustained more than $1 million in damages.

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  21. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 5:42 pm

    I never understood what was so difficult about semi-colons. I know when they are required, and if I use one it is entirely justifiable. Separating compound lists including commas is the most obvious no-brainer. I also think semi-colons are the exact correct way to punctuate bullet points, wwith an Oxford comma for the last in the list. My eternal punctuation question, and believe me, I’m more or less at sea, his how to deal with parenthetical phrases that end a sentence. I believe most times the punctuation belongs outside of the paren. viz.:

    Odin will rain down Valhalla (i.e.,Ragnarokk). It makes no sense whatever for the full stop to arrive within the parentheses. So seriously, experts, tell me how I’m incorrect. I knnow this is abstruse, but way back in school, I got dinged by a Stehndal prof, with a B+ for this exact sort of error, or alleged error. . In latter days, I have made cash tutoring UGA athletes at study hall. An easily distracted by a drug or a girl or both student, I can’t discuss committment to education. I have been committed more recently.

    As far as punctuation and usage for id est. that is not an abbreviation, it’s a Latin term anybody educated should know, and My stand is that it should never be abbreviated. Possibly, were this true, it would never be misused; it is not rocket science. And that’s a good semicolon. The implication is “no freaking duh. No Duh reallly bugged my late mom for some reason. I contend that No duh means something so specific and non-injurious it should be part of the language. No judgement is implied by No Duh. It means Both you and I know that is obvious

    The Gayroller shirt? I dunno. I get the idea, but that seems like broad as Rosie’s beam satire. There are people that believe in that sort of shit all over the net. Guys that are campus heroes of the situation, like that weenie seersucker asshole that was Nixons favorite? Yeah right. He rushed the hooch and took away the .50 cal. Republicans on war heroes are so fucking hilarious it is beyond belief. W flying Snoopy’s biplane protecting the O Club. No? What other picture.

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  22. Jolene said on August 25, 2011 at 6:06 pm

    Your parenthetical phrase is correct, april. You only use final punctuation inside parentheses if the parenthetical material is itself a sentence. So, in principle, you could have a sentence that ends w/ “.).”.

    Example: The MLK ceremony will be held as scheduled, unless the weather makes it necessary to reschedule (It’s currently scheduled for 11 AM.).

    Not the greatest example, but you get the idea.

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  23. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 6:09 pm

    How does anybody claim W served? I thought it was immoral, what was W’s excuse? W never even showed for mandatory flight exams. When he did he was too coked up. And with the magic of the swiftboat assholes, Kerry was trying to get hurt to be a war hero. He knew none of those shots were potentially fatal when he rescued his crewmate. How did these assholes get away with this slur? How stupid are people?

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  24. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 6:21 pm

    Thanks Jolene, this is something that has always bugged me about internet communication. I thought that was correct, but it’s good to have somebody that writes well back me up. And the double full stop in your example is right on. In my opinion. So tonight is a big night on TV. Westen finds out who framed him. Acting is mighty good on Burn Notice. Writing is even better. I kinda like how the blend takes place between cable and the drivel (also known as dribble) on the networks. One ends and another picks up. Fox had a great show with Human Target and destroyed it. Fx had Terriers, best ever since Jim Rockford, and they fucked it up bigtime. And they tromped on Damages. Clueless shitheels. I’ll give SAMCRO a pass because it has been very good in the past, but they start screwing with Jax, I’m outa there.

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  25. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 6:31 pm

    No joke at all. W and acrually serving? Godawmight what a joke.
    And Kerry didn’t? How stupid can people be? Seriously. No shit? One piece of shit compared to an absolute hero? No joke? Where do things get to do with seriously bogus whatever? No shit? Seriosly bullshit

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  26. Jolene said on August 25, 2011 at 6:33 pm

    More on the cathedral. Apparently, they are going to have to raise several million dollars.

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  27. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 6:44 pm

    Compwring kerry’s experience is more moronic. Kerr vs. W , you have to be a moron. No shit? You have got to be an idiot. What I might say? Who knows what anbody might say. But seriously. No shit? Whatever we think. Whatever what anybody thought. Whatever I thought for sure, whatever you thought might mean something.

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  28. Connie said on August 25, 2011 at 6:54 pm

    National Cathedral is built using classic European stone methods. Which means those spires are just stacked pieces of carved stone. One spire is gone, others are damaged. Pictures: http://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2011/08/at-national-cathedral-concerns-about-damage-from-hurricane-irene/244039/

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  29. alex said on August 25, 2011 at 7:07 pm

    Crying shame about Mike Dooley. I had only met him a few times, but he told some great stories from the trenches.

    My fave was this. He was flying around in the press section of Dan Quayle’s plane in the run-up to the ’88 elections and ended up at a rally of Young Republicans in Arizona, where they were going to trot out Barry Goldwater, who’d become quite a cantankerous old man.

    When Goldwater got up to speak, no one expected the things that were to come out of his mouth. He lashed out at the conservative movement and said it had become unrecognizable to him and had nothing to do with his values or ideas and that he didn’t want to be associated with it. The crowd was aghast.

    I saw a 60 Minutes segment some time after that in which he appeared with a gay nephew or grandson and talked about how his views had evolved on a lot of things.

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  30. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 8:18 pm

    All that Founding Fathers horesshit, I am absolutely sure none of those fucking ninnies ever gave a thought to the smartest offspringHenry Adams. I quoted him to y’all yesterday. His description of his education may well be the best book anybody ever wrote,. Which may have a way of informing us about our kids. Nancy, I’d not offer advice.
    but I would say that Kate has a gift and music schools might not be a terrible idea. She seems to be a bass prodigy. And she’s beautiful. Being a great bass player seems like something worthhwhile to aspire to, If you embrace possibilities and don’t just bury your intelligence under a basket. I don’t know a lot about this sort of thing. My kid was driven to her very successful grad program. And she is absolutely spectacular at rescuing people from psychich caverns when they’ve suffered closed brain injuries. I mean, think about how you’d feel. So that is what E does. It’s a fairly amazing thing to do. Some of the funding for this sort of program comes from the Feds. I guess that’s welfare we are supposed to revile. Unless it’s first responders. Whatever, no shit, who makes up being a real Murrican>? That would be dickless Cheney, that thinks the $trillion on Halliburtons war made mor sense than the almost no-cost disposal of
    w’s BFF Gadaffi. Are the PNAC assholes still trying to act like sentient human beings?

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  31. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 8:27 pm

    What I mean is m kid brings people back from buried in their little minds. She’s a genious. She knows how to bring people back from the brink. She is smarter and more committed than anbody could claim. Are we kidding?

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  32. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 8:32 pm

    Not in a million years. On the other hand. http://www.youtube.com/swf/l.swf?video_id=5kMi9tvuuZY&rel=1&color1=FF3366&color2=950C02&border=1. If there is a better movie, let’s hear about it.

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  33. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 8:36 pm

    Look up Glenn Beck you fricking morons. That piece of shit has gone away.

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  34. april glaspie said on August 25, 2011 at 9:51 pm

    What I think, what I said. whatever we thought, How we said. Whatever. It’s kinda foolish to think we have the whole deal covered. It’s all covered, and we can;t consider what whoever thinks.

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  35. James said on August 25, 2011 at 10:22 pm


    Are you Prospero in drag? Just wondering…

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  36. nancy said on August 25, 2011 at 10:28 pm

    James: Yes.

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  37. brian stouder said on August 25, 2011 at 10:33 pm

    Parallel with the Fabulous Oatmeal guide to grammar and usage, Rachel Maddow last night did a piece on how many ways Khadafy’s name is spelled, by various media outlets and so on; turns out that the Libyan dictator’s name is almost unGoogleable, as his name is literally spelled more than ten dozen different ways

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  38. Jolene said on August 25, 2011 at 11:21 pm

    Sunday’s MLK dedication is now cancelled–a shame, as it was scheduled to coincide w/ the anniversary of the “Dream” speech.

    It’s very weird to have all this forecasting and preparation going on so far in advance of the storm. I sort of feel like I should just sit still and wait for it, but, in this heavily populated area, I guess you can’t wait until it’s upon you. In NY, they’re evacuating hospitals and nursing homes in low-lying areas. That’s got to be a difficult process.

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  39. april glaspie said on August 26, 2011 at 12:12 am

    Jolene, I have never gotten into the parking lot that the ecodus always turns into. There is a single bridge leaving our island, and it is a joke. People run out of gas and the hurricanes always head tor NC. We are not going anywhere. What’s the point. If our place gets trashed, what do we have to come back to? I’d rather get killed in defense. Sort of like Vergil Caine. I don’t see anything good coming from bailing and neither does S. We’ll hold out. Plenty of batteries and LCD flashlights. Lots of brewskis and some Grey Goose, and a barely cracked half gallon of jack and each other. I just don’t see how it’s all that threatening. It’s supposed to do the normal shit and head for NC. I think there are more Pray away the ga folks there that God is pissed off at. But if the hurricane could take out Joe
    Wilson, I’d be more inclined to believe in God. We will wave as it passes us by.

    And as for grammar, where did these morons on the net come up with Me thinks? Methinks is lame in the first place, but making it two words is so lame, it is almost beyond comprehension,
    and there is the foolish internet trope about “over at”. Over at? Seriously?

    what drivel, or, since I’m on the tubes, dribble. And things don’t jive, they either jibe or they don’t. And you can hone in on something if you mean to sharpen it, but you probably mean home.

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  40. Jen said on August 26, 2011 at 2:03 am

    So glad my sister, who lives in New Hampshire, drove back to Indiana this weekend on a planned vacation. She’s not going back until Monday so she should miss all the hurricane drama. That’s good with me! She also didn’t feel the earthquake. My thoughts are with everyone over that way, though; I know a lot of people who live out that way.

    I love The Oatmeal, especially the grammar comics. Many of those grammar problems make me twitchy when I see them. I’m also a fan of the Hyperbole and a Half comic about a lot vs. alot: http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html

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  41. coozledad said on August 26, 2011 at 8:40 am

    You just knew they’d have to get Ken whacked out on Paxil to get him to his beard commitment ceremony. He looks lost there: even his hands betray the vast emptiness of the abyss opening in his soul as he cups Barbie’s ass, searching wanly for firm glutes.

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