I stuck to my guns (sorta) and broke away at noon today for a short bike ride. Not much of one — just a couple errands to the post office, the bank, but enough to feel like my ass isn’t entirely made of blubber. Apparently, autumn is well under way — I rode through a yellow blizzard of ash leaves, nearly wiped out on ping-pong-ball size acorns, and still got a little sweaty.
The post office errand was to forward a mailer to the Lansing office for possible Truth Squadding. If you’re in Michigan, you can find many of the state’s political ads and related communication vetted there. Please to click, keep us going.
It’s going to be a long month. Which I think I said yesterday, but it bears repeating.
Change of subject.
Alan said the other day that he hoped the Pussy Riot story went on and on, because he so enjoyed hearing Diane Rehm say “Pussy Riot” in her quavery voice on NPR. I feel the same way about the University of Tennessee butt-chugging story. If you aren’t up to date: Apparently a frat boy was hospitalized with a sky-high blood-alcohol level, and evidence at the scene suggested he’d ingested box wine via enema.
Please don’t ask me why. Do I look like a frat boy? I don’t see how squirting wine up your ass would hit the bloodstream faster than sending it down the traditional pipe, but then, it is far more entertaining, and it requires reporters to say “butt chugging” over and over again. Again, this is a story where all you need to do follow the Gawker tags, and you can keep up just fine.
And what is the tag? Why, butt chugging, of course. Butt chugging, butt chugging, butt chugging.
The University of Tennessee has been officially crossed off Kate’s college list. Just kidding — it was never on it.
Let’s skip to bloggage:
“Aw, shucky ducky,” Cain’s speech began. “Now let me see if I’m in the right place — uh, Go Blue?”
Ah, yes, Go Blue indeed. And what the hell, go red, too — after all, this was a cross-party fiesta. Just ask the uncomfortably pluralized Job Creators Solutions group, the organization that brought Cain and the College Truth Tour to Ann Arbor. According to their website, the College Truth Tour is a bipartisan initiative devoted to setting students straight on matters of the economy. And if you have any doubts about the bipartisan-ness of a lecture from a Republican presented by the College Republicans, never fear — the bleeding hearts got their word in. Specifically, from the back row of the auditorium, usually offering a poignant rebuttal to whatever poignant point Cain made. Just listen:
“The United States does not have a sugar daddy,” Cain yelled. “Who we gonna borrow from?”
“Australia!” someone shouted from the crowd. “Germany! China!”
And the geography lesson continued for another thirty seconds.
Remember when presidential candidates didn’t immediately descend into sideshow after they withdrew from their race? I blame Bob Dole and his damn Viagra ads.
First, let’s kill all the foodies. Or at least make them shut up for a while. The worst of them, anyway.
Southeast Michigan, meet your soon-to-be newest congressman. If you can find him.
I’m going to watch a history lecture. Good night.