A tale of two appliances.

Some years back, I posted a picture of my popcorn popper. This one:

popcornpopper

It’s a Sears Kenmore. My late Aunt Charlene — who was really my mother’s cousin — worked there all her life, and gave it as a gift to my Irish-twin elder siblings when they were “real little kids,” in my mother’s recollection. They’re both Medicare-eligible, so I’d put its age at, conservatively, 60 years.

It still works perfectly. I use it about once a month.

I don’t have a picture of the other appliance in this tale, because it’s sitting in the trash and I’m not going out in 20-degree weather to get a mugshot. It’s my Cuisinart coffee maker, dead at the age of 2. It replaced the Krups, which lasted about five years, maybe more. I don’t know what the hell happened to it; one day I turned it on, the light lit, but nothing happened. The plate didn’t get warm, the gurgle didn’t start, it just laid there like a sick old whore.

Once upon a time, I’d have taken it to a small appliance repair shop and gotten by for a week with Starbucks and the Kuerig, but nowadays? You just pitch it and buy a new one. It so happened I got another Krups, pretty much the identical model we had before. And I realized I’d forgotten something about that one — a design flaw that makes the pot dribble all over the counter unless it’s poured at precisely the right speed and angle.

“If you pour it at precisely the right speed and angle, it doesn’t drip,” I told a swearing Alan as he mopped up a spill yesterday.

“I SHOULD BE ABLE TO POUR IT HOWEVER I WANT,” he snapped back, and you know what? He’s right. I realize a coffeemaker is a more complicated appliance than a mid-century popcorn popper, but for cryin’ out loud, we ain’t putting up a shuttle here, either.

I haz a mad. So in that frame of mind I’m presenting a news roundup I’m calling the YOU FUCKERS digest.

She said she was a victim of the Knockout Game, that two black men had punched her in the face when she left a St. Louis bar, but guess what? Her boyfriend did it, and she was covering for him. YOU FUCKER. Do click through and check out that super-shiner she got, and scoff with me at the explanation:

The two claim Simms inadvertently hit DePew in the eye after she placed her hand on his and he “flung it back violently.”

Brandon Rios didn’t look that bad after going 12 rounds with Manny Pacquaio. But hey — blame the black guys.

I think I’ve mentioned before that the streetlights on I-94 between downtown and my exit were out, contributing to the general haunted-forest atmosphere of the east side. So in the last year,
the state department of transportation spent millions replacing all the lights with shiny new ones — I suspect LEDs because during the brief time they were on, lo they bathed the freeway in the pure light of heaven, or an UFO tractor beam.

Well, they’re all out again — copper thieves. YOU FUCKERS. This is a crime all authorities seem powerless to stop.

I need a job like this, where they fire you and then pay you $8 million just to keep your mouth shut. Because you and everybody you work for is a FUCKER. I would retire and move someplace where fuckers like me are welcome.

Non-fucker bloggage?

Here’s something amusing and fun — evidently students at Taylor University, a Christian school in Upland, Ind., observe a tradition called “silent night” at basketball games. (I don’t know if it’s every game or just one.) They sit in absolute silence in the stands until the 10th point is scored, at which point they — well, watch the video.

There isn’t much to do in Upland. I’m sure they like it that way.

Off to Lansing this morning.

Posted at 12:30 am in Detroit life, News, Same ol' same ol' |
 

72 responses to “A tale of two appliances.”

  1. Dexter said on December 10, 2013 at 1:23 am

    YOU FUCKER! Ronald Reagan vetoed a bill to impose sanctions on apartheid- ruled South Africa, only to be overruled by Congress. Reagan called Madiba a terrorist also. YOU FUCKER RONALD REAGAN!
    http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/the-fix/wp/2013/12/07/why-nelson-mandela-was-on-a-terrorism-watch-list-in-2008/

  2. Dexter said on December 10, 2013 at 1:41 am

    I buy a lot of coffee makers, have had many Mr. Coffees, lots of other brands, Sylvania, West Bend, no-name discount drippers, a camping stove top pot like you see in cowboy movies.
    In the 1970s I used an electric percolator. My fave is my French press, but it takes a wee bit more time and cools too fast for everyday use, at least for my schedule. Drivel, I know, but I am a believer in the spiritual aspect of coffee. I do not go to the desert and ingest peyote, I do not fire up any smokables, my wine days are over, and today I probably won’t pour any distilled spirits or crack a can of beer, since that is now well back in my past. But the magic of tea and coffee, I am awed by. So anyway, I have been looking for about 20 years for this style coffee pot. http://news.brown.edu/files/imagecache/ursa_feature_image/article_images/07-074a.jpg
    It is the pot from which was served what my friends and me call the first AA coffee, in Akron, Ohio, 78 years ago. It has to be the exact style. Over the years I have found many that are almost right, but always, a little detail is wrong. Maybe I don’t really want to find one. I don’t know. At least as recently as 2000, the famous coffee pot was house at Brown University. http://www.brownalumnimagazine.com/content/view/1603/40/

  3. MaryRC said on December 10, 2013 at 2:09 am

    Irish twins, hah … haven’t heard that expression for a long while.

  4. Deborah said on December 10, 2013 at 4:43 am

    I make coffee either with a drip cone, a French press or a chemex. I haven’t had an electric coffee maker in ages. I’m one of those weirdos who buys whole bean coffee and grinds it fresh every morning. In Chicago I have a great grinder made by Braun that I’ve had for ages. In Santa Fe I have a really crappy one that I got at Starbucks, I should throw it away and get a better one but I never do. Every morning when I’m here I just cuss and swear when I use it. It’s amazing what we put up with. The reason why I don’t use electric coffee makers anymore is because I think they make coffee have a sour taste after you use them awhile.

  5. ROGirl said on December 10, 2013 at 6:20 am

    I have started reading David Folkenflik’s book “Murdoch’s World: The Last of the Old Media Empires,” and my response is: YOU F___ERS!

  6. David C. said on December 10, 2013 at 7:01 am

    Wait until you have to replace the electronic touchpad on any appliance. I had to replace one on our 4 year old gas range. I was able to do it myself, so it was “only” $350. If I had to pay someone to do it probably would have been well North of $500. The range that came from our first house was probably 20 years old when we bought the house and was still going strong 11 years later when we sold it. It’s maddening.

  7. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 7:39 am

    Deborah, I love the smell of fresh-ground coffee, and my mom and dad were great coffee drinkers (my dad added milk, but my mom drank it black and hot).

    I’d sooner drink Tide detergent than coffee – but it smells good!

    Over the last 6 weeks, the touchpads on our stove and on the microwave oven have both become somewhat balky

  8. coozledad said on December 10, 2013 at 8:11 am

    We’ve got one of those coffee pots that waters the countertops. My theory is if the pot is wet on the outside, capillary attraction draws the water over the spout and down the side of the carafe onto the counter and the floor.

    I haven’t proven this, though.

    We have established through several trials that when our coffee maker heats up, the housing for the filter springs free and the water that didn’t leak over the side of the carafe boils out of the sprinkler array at the top of the unit onto the lid of the carafe, over the side, onto and underneath the heating unit, the countertop, and floor.

    One thing you might want to try is preemptively dumping some of the water from the carafe onto the floor to let it get its ya yas out.

  9. Jolene said on December 10, 2013 at 8:36 am

    I love this popcorn popper. Used to have one very much like it, though mine was of more recent vintage and only lasted about 25 years. After it died, I had some difficulty finding another satisfactory solution, but now I have one that makes real popcorn in the microwave. Can’t beat that.

  10. alex said on December 10, 2013 at 8:40 am

    My mom had one of those Krups machines with the decanter that poured coffee everywhere but the cup. My folks looked like circus clowns trying to get themselves caffeinated in the morning. I can’t imagine the company hasn’t recognized by now the flawed design of its product and done something about it.

    Don’t even get me started about Fuckers. Our state seems to elect nothing but Fuckers. From here they go on to be even bigger Fuckers. And when they’re done Fucking around on K Street, they come back to Fuck over the citizens of our state all over again.

  11. alex said on December 10, 2013 at 8:42 am

    Whoopsie. Forgot to link they come back to Fuck over the citizens of our state all over again.

  12. beb said on December 10, 2013 at 8:43 am

    As they say, ‘birds gotta fly, grifters gotta grift’. The reason you see more grifters in the Republican party than the Democrats is because the Republicans have more money. Lewis’ situation is that he was fired out of pique and afterwards did Ailes remember that Lewis knows where all the bodies are buried (perhaps literally) and so the scramble to hush him up. Even so lewis needs to take the Snowden defense – let everyone know that there’s a cache somewhere with all the juiciest details to be release in the event of his unexpected death.

    Personally the life I’d prefer is Jamie Dimons. He’s cost his company billions in fines and penalties because he won’t discipline his investors for cheating, stealing and general larceny and continues to take home tens of millions of dollas each year. When it comes to the worst of the YOU FUCKERS for 2013, Dimon will be at the top of the class.

    In defense of your coffee maker. That Marvelous 60 year old popcorn popper is used only once a month while the coffee maker was used daily. Your coffee maker died after about 720 usages (2years x 365 uses per year). Your popcorn popper has had 12 x 60 uses or about 720 usages. So don’t look down on your coffee maker too much.

  13. Dorothy said on December 10, 2013 at 9:07 am

    LOVED the basketball game video! Watched it once and gasped in astonishment, then laughed. After Mike got out of the shower I played it again for him. Mega enjoyment at this house – thanks.

    I’m trying to come up with ideas for Christmas gifts/surprises for our adult kids. One is going to be a g/c to a restaurant in Snowshoe WV for an impending ski trip (daughter and boyfriend). After that I’m coming up empty. Any ideas? Son won’t be home until February, at which point he and his wife will have their Christmas. But I’d like to have something to give to our d-i-l on Christmas day – she’s invited for dinner. They hope to buy a house a few months after they honeymoon in July. Maybe we could just get a pre-paid VISA card and they can use it for new house purchases. That sounds boring as hell to me, though. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

  14. Connie said on December 10, 2013 at 9:13 am

    For us it’s the cheap Mr. Coffee, we have gone through several in recent years which we think is due to our mineral laden well water. So a year or so ago we got out the old Farberware stainless steel percolator, which sees to be going as well. Sounds like it perks, water gets plenty hot, but it makes awfully pale coffee. So cheap Mr. Coffee is on my Christmas list.

    My retired neighbor just repaired the toaster he and his later wife got for a wedding present, and not for the first time. Has to be close to 50.

    This is our fourth winter in this house and we suddenly have a mouse infestation. Score so far is 12 mice and one foot. I am tired of cleaning out the silverware drawer.

  15. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 9:18 am

    Well, today as we ponder the F-bomb, spare a thought for the T.

    According to the ‘this day in history’ calendar upon my desk, on December 10, 1915 – the one millionth Ford rolled off the River Rouge assembly line…and nobody noted it at the time!

    But they DID celebrate and publicize the ten millionth Ford, in 1924; and the 15 millionth Ford in 1927 – the year they stopped making the Model T.

    Makes ya just wanna drop the F-bomb all over again, eh?

  16. Connie said on December 10, 2013 at 9:21 am

    President Barack Obama on Tuesday shook hands with Cuban President Raul Castro before taking the podium at a memorial service for former South African President Nelson Mandela.

    Uh Oh, now he’s really in trouble with the right wingers.

  17. Jolene said on December 10, 2013 at 9:28 am

    Dorothy, how about using your seamstress skills to make something for your DIL? Or an IOU to make something (curtains, pillows, whatever) for the house. I agree that something to unwrap would be nice.

  18. LAMary said on December 10, 2013 at 9:28 am

    What Deborah said. Chemex or French Press. I always used those, then I won a Cuisinart coffee maker at an office Christmas party. It died in two years. I replaced it and that died in two years. I’m back to Chemex. For a while the filters were hard to find but Chemex has be rediscovered, again, and they have the filters at Target. It makes good coffee and it looks beautiful.

  19. Pam (the sister) said on December 10, 2013 at 9:41 am

    I didn’t know that Aunt Char bought the popcorn popper, I thought it was just ALWAYS THERE. It’s amazing that it still works, although we never washed the bottom, just the top part where the oil and popcorn goes. It looks never washed, aina?

    Dexter – people need to remember the real Ronald Regan, a real F’er. He’s been the subject (IMHO) of much revisionist lore of late. He’s getting the ole whitewash, erasing a multitude of his sins which include the beginnings of outsourcing all of America to cheap overseas labor, among many others. I’ll keep my eyes open for one of those coffee pots you want.

  20. Prospero said on December 10, 2013 at 10:03 am

    I love the Bodum French press. 28 oz. of excellent coffee in the time it takes to boil the water. 30 second cleanup. And NO filters.

    Dorothy@13: Does DIL like to cook? This is a Kickstarter I got in on last year, and it is far and away the most gorgeous cookbook I’ve ever seen. I bought a copy last Christmas for one of my sisters in law, and she loves it. Susan’s a cookbook collector and she says this book, with spectacular hand painted illustrations is great for just browsing. One of the best gifts I’ve ever given based on the reaction of the gift. This book is a work of fine art. The gift I really want to give somebody this year is the Marc Ghagall first edition Jerusalem Windows advertised in the NYT book review, signed and dated 1965 by Chagall on two original color lithographs. It’s at Bauman’s Rare Books. But, damn, I misplaced my spare $9800. There is a new Stax Records history out called Respect Yourself I would like somebody to get for me–Otis Redding, Wilson Pickett, Sam & Dave, Pop Staples. Reasonably priced at $30. Anybody that needs a gift idea for a smart, bookish middle grader should look into The Houdini Box, by Brian Selznick, author of The Invention of Hugo Cabret, upon which the wonderful movie Hugo was based. The Hugo Cabret book would make a great gift for anyone that loves books, It’s the way to publishing’s future. No way on the blue earth could a Kindle or Nook do those illustrations justice. I bought myself a DVD version of Lori Petty’s brilliant Tank Girl. Looked for it a long time.

    That jerk that claimed “black guys did it” to protect her abusive boyfriend should start a suicide pact with George Zimmerman’s GF, who wants to drop charges. Of course, the debunking of the knockout game story has produced a toadstool-like profusion of defensive bullshit about Tawana Bradley and Al Sharpton and it’s not racist because “both sides do it”. Remember that anti-Obama campaign worker that carved a B into her own face (karma should direct she healed with keloids on her cheek). Well it was backwards because she had to use a mirror. Susan Smith? Chuck Stewart, who shot himself in the gut to solidify his claim he’d been heroically trying to protect his wife from “black guys” after he put a bullet in her brain? Tawana Bradley was a scared tween. These others were psychotic adult racist criminals.

    Connie@16: HuffPost will report that the President was sealing a secret deal to hand over Gitmo. And how much does it cost to run that Godforsaken facility? When there are SuperMax prisons built, paid for and sitting empty in the USA.

  21. Bitter Scribe said on December 10, 2013 at 10:05 am

    The statement by the St. Louis police chief about that liar and her boyfriend has to be one of the blandest ever: “I hope these two individuals get help in their relationship.”

    That Fucks News payoff looks like it dwarfs the one to Bill “Falafel” O’Reilly’s lust object, Andrea Mackris. Between that and the “News of the World” collapse, I wonder if News Corp. will have to take a charge on its 2013 financial statement for “general shitheadedness.”

  22. Julie Robinson said on December 10, 2013 at 10:55 am

    Dorothy, I vote for a sewing IOU along with a semi naughty nighty for when he gets home. Anticipation!

  23. Danny said on December 10, 2013 at 11:00 am

    I love the smell of selective outrage in the morning. It smells like… naiveté. Someday, this war is going to end.

  24. LAMary said on December 10, 2013 at 11:14 am

    What kind of coffeemaker do you use, Danny?

  25. Danny said on December 10, 2013 at 11:19 am

    Cuisanart

    http://www.bestbuy.com/site/cuisinart-brew-central-brewer/4765748.p?id=1063393351137&skuId=4765748&ref=06&loc=01&ci_src=14110944&ci_sku=4765748&extensionType={adtype}:{network}&s_kwcid=PTC!pla!{keyword}!{matchtype}!{adwords_producttargetid}!{network}!{ifmobile:M}!{creative}&kpid=4765748&k_clickid=0484ab8d-b504-3669-83b6-00001fcb91b7

  26. coozledad said on December 10, 2013 at 11:23 am

    Someday, this war is going to end.
    And the right wing douchenozzles will lose this one, too.

    Tia Tequila, Megan McCain gal pal and third tier famewhore shares interesting thinks about Hitler and why y’all so mean:
    http://wonkette.com/536181/tila-tequila-doesnt-hate-jews-she-just-loves-hitler-and-would-like-some-attention-is-that-so-wrong

  27. Heather said on December 10, 2013 at 11:24 am

    I use a Bialetti stovetop espresso maker that I picked up in Italy about 12 years ago. The rubber ring thingie needs to be replaced every five years or so, but it works great. I have a Mr. Coffee coffeemaker for when company comes over.

    I don’t know why I stress out at my job so much when those FUCKERS can screw up big and get paid for it.

  28. coozledad said on December 10, 2013 at 11:24 am

    That’s TILA Tequila. Who would name their child “Tia”, anyways.

  29. Charlotte said on December 10, 2013 at 11:36 am

    We go through coffee makers here — with 2 vacation rentals, Chuck always has a spare coffee maker in the closet. They suck, all of them.

    My KitchenAid mixer on the other hand — well, since I’m turning 50 today, that makes it 42 years old. Mom ordered it from Marshall Fields with all the attachments the day after Dad moved out. They’d been bickering about it being too expensive, so she bought it before the credit cards were changed. I got it about 20 years ago — and it never lets me down.

    And I’m torn between Ronald Reagan and Bill Clinton for the Fuck you awards — Reagan for the destruction of the social fabric that he instigated, and Clinton for NAFTA and Glass Steagall. Fuckers both of them.

    Blizzard here this morning. Warmed up to 20, but 60mph gusts blowing old and new snow sideways. We were going to White Sulphur for my birthday, but postponing. Sitting outside in a blizzard in a hot spring that has been drained of heat by an excessive cold spell doesn’t sound fun. To say nothing of the 50 miles of drifted road between here and there. I think I’m just going to roast a chicken.

  30. Bitter Scribe said on December 10, 2013 at 11:45 am

    That’s TILA Tequila. Who would name their child “Tia”, anyways.

    Probably more than would name their child “Tila.” Anyway, I have a sneaking suspicion that that isn’t her birth name.

  31. Sherri said on December 10, 2013 at 12:13 pm

    While computers themselves keep getting more powerful and cheaper, I’ve noticed that parts for appliances and the like that contain computers get more expensive. When my washer died a year or so ago, even if I replaced the part myself, it cost more than the 10 year old washer was worth. Remember the days when labor used to cost more than parts when you got your car repaired? No more; I had a major repair recently, and the ratio was 2 to 1 parts to labor.

  32. Dexter said on December 10, 2013 at 12:13 pm

    “God Bless The Day I found You”…VINEGAR as a lime-shale deposit-destroyer inside coffee pots. White vinegar, you are a friend of mine. :)

    Awed right now…I recorded NBC from 4:AM–8:AM , live from South Africa. What a collection of heroes, despots, criminals and thieves in attendance. Also the best of the best of humanity. This might be a true signature event of this century.

  33. Jolene said on December 10, 2013 at 12:21 pm

    I had the same thought, Dexter. I mean, could there be a worse leader than Robert Mugabe?

  34. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 12:21 pm

    Charlotte – Happy Birthday, and welcome to the club!

  35. Deborah said on December 10, 2013 at 12:39 pm

    Happy Birthday Charlotte, 50 is definitely a big one. I was in Paris when I turned 50, I commemorated it with making one of those machines that fake gold coins which stamp the date. It just happened to be at Château de Vaux-le-Vicomte where we were that day. I have no idea where that coin is today, I’m sure I saved it somewhere.

    And LA Mary, I love the way my Chemex looks especially when I place it on one of those circular cork hot pads.

  36. Deborah said on December 10, 2013 at 12:43 pm

    That sentence makes no sense it should read: I commemorated it with making one of those fake gold coins that have the date stamped, in one of those machines.

    I’m not sure how much better that sounds, but I hope you know what I mean.

  37. Prospero said on December 10, 2013 at 1:01 pm

    Clinton’s hands were tied on NAFTA. HW left him a briar patch that could not be escaped when he bailed out. Clinton did his best to ameliorate the damaging aspects of NAFTA with the labor and environmental side agreements, which would have gone far to ameliorate the deleterious effects of NAFTA, but, lo and behold, W shitcanned them in his first couple of weeks of his legacy residency in the White House. Clinton was not blameless, as a staunch supporter of NAFTA, but he had the brains and common sense to see its inherent flaws. There is no telling whether his fixes would have worked with a real president in charge and dedicated to making them work, but W was listening to neocons, multinationals and Kommissar Karl when he was supposed to be running the country, so nobody will ever know. That horse is way out of the barn.

    Jolene@33: Raygun’s old School of the Americas pals in Central and South America, like Pinochet, Somoza, Stroessner and their evil ilk. Nicolae Ceausescu and his good buddy Mobuto Sese Seko, a few, but not many. Of course, given the support those SA and CA thugs got from Raygun, you could toss the Gipper in with them:

    http://www.globalresearch.ca/operation-condor-campaign-by-us-backed-latin-american-dictators-to-hunt-down-torture-and-murder-tens-of-thousands-of-opponents/5325695#

  38. MarkH said on December 10, 2013 at 1:02 pm

    Charlotte, Happy Birthday! Didn’t realize we were so close; mine is tomorrow, but I’m considerably older than you. Maybe the oldest one here, although I sense Dexter and Michael G may give me a run for the money. White Sulpher Springs is a hidden gem in Montana; too bad if you can’t make it.

    Temps rising here as well (up to +20 from sub-zero), bringing winds and some snow, but not much. Winds are always more prounounced in Charlotte’s side of Yellowstone.

  39. Prospero said on December 10, 2013 at 1:03 pm

    Happy 50th Charlotte. Mine has disappeared from the rearview mirror a while ago.

  40. Julie Robinson said on December 10, 2013 at 1:37 pm

    Charlotte , I hope you have a fantastic birthday!

  41. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 2:16 pm

    Prospero, and while we’re at it, and speaking of ‘F’ers, don’t foreget that it was the out-going Poppy Bush – who had already lost his re-election bid! – who put US troops into Mogadishu (21 years ago yesterday (when Charlotte was 29!), thus handing President-elect Clinton a shit sandwich.

    All these latter-day pants-on-fire “Benghazi-gate” maroons might oughta read some US history, if only to gain even the barest scintilla of perspective

  42. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 2:18 pm

    (and by the way, I think Oxy-Rush needs a hit of happy-gas, or something, given the way he’s characterizing the President of the United States in South Africa, today. A new low, even for swamp-muck like him)

  43. Dave said on December 10, 2013 at 2:33 pm

    Our Cuisinart died the same way as our hostess’s about a month ago. That was our second Cuisinart but our first is still working, getting occasional use in Florida. We discovered that we had, in fact, registered it with Cuisinart and because it was a month short of being two years, we were able to replace it. It did, however, cost us a $10 fee to Cuisinart and another $21 to ship the old one to Cuisinart in a Phoenix suburb.

    We’ve had several Mr. Coffee’s, a Bunn, and a Sunbeam percolator coffee pot that we got when we were first married. When the last Cuisinart quit working, I was going to use the percolator, but I couldn’t find the power cord.

    We also had this Cuisinart but only for about two weeks. One morning, it decided to drip and we couldn’t stop it.
    http://tinyurl.com/nsx3rzh

    We like the way it makes coffee so we’ve stuck with them. We nearly switched to Krups this last time and we had no idea about the spout problems.

    Ah, Tila Tequila, another name I see occasionally but have little idea of who she is. However, just yesterday, I saw that she was blogging that the actor, Paul Walker, was killed by conspiracy. I should note that I had no idea who Paul Walker was until he met his unfortunate demise recently.

    Happy birthday, Charlotte, from another who saw 50 pass by some time back.

  44. LAMary said on December 10, 2013 at 2:47 pm

    Just got back from a long visit to the orthopedist with my younger son, the bicyclist. He fell yesterday and broke two bones in his wrist, specifically the ends of the radius and the ulna. He’s got to get a CT scan now and then likely outpatient surgery to put plate or something in his wrist. Poor kid.

  45. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 2:49 pm

    Ouch! I suspect the kid’ll be fine – but how’s mom doing?

  46. Charlotte said on December 10, 2013 at 2:49 pm

    Thanks everyone for making me feel like the youngster in the group again — and Mark, we’re off to White Sulphur, just not tonight. Probably at the weekend. And with my family history, I’m just thrilled to see another big round number show up and I’m not a drunk, not crazy, almost own my own home, have a job and have a nice, stable, lovely life. It’s a big accomplishment among my people.

  47. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 3:08 pm

    Charlotte – word!

    I am now a month or two past the age that my dad died – and I have to say, I’m doing better than he was doing, in general.

  48. jwfromnj said on December 10, 2013 at 3:14 pm

    I miss my mom’s old percolater . Mandela was a terrorist if stick to definitions. Winnie is a thug and would fit right in with Yoko. Can anyone imagine making small talk with gwb on a 12 hour flight. Yeah you’d look at Laura and be pained for that woman but after three hours of W endorsing his new Hyscuvarna brush saw and asking them for a few more bags of AF1 m&m’s you’d be asking what single malts were stocked and wishing you ordered a new Air Force One with more than one bedroom. The real rock star – Bill who chartered his own jet and didn’t’ travel with Hillary, Barrack, and Bush and no doubt enjoyed a fine cigar in transit.

  49. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 3:20 pm

    Mandela was a terrorist if stick to definitions

    No more so than Thomas Jefferson was; and possibly less so

  50. LAMary said on December 10, 2013 at 3:27 pm

    Brian, I’m looking at the deductible and cringing.

  51. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 3:37 pm

    Oy!

    Not to beat on a dead horse, but all the faux gnashing of teeth and cases of the vapors over ACA just kill me. My lovely wife and I have watched, over the past two decades, as our (really pretty good) health insurance coverage steadily and inexorably covers less and less, and becomes more and more expensive (not by portions, but by factors)

  52. Bitter Scribe said on December 10, 2013 at 3:41 pm

    Ah, Tila Tequila, another name I see occasionally but have little idea of who she is.

    No one knows who she is. Judging by her latest ramblings, I doubt that Tia Tequila knows who Tia Tequila is.

  53. LAMary said on December 10, 2013 at 4:01 pm

    I have an HSA to which my employer contributes about 2/3 of the deductible, but it’s December and that HSA has been spent on dental work and glasses for the most part.

  54. brian stouder said on December 10, 2013 at 4:07 pm

    We do the HSA thing, too, and it mostly goes to the dentist.

    Generally speaking of health insurance companies, it boils down to “heads they win”, and “tails you lose”

  55. Dexter said on December 10, 2013 at 4:34 pm

    nance, what’s the buzz amongst your friends and acquaintances over the new Belle Isle deal? Now a state park, big money to flow in, upgraded rest rooms for a start, lots more maintenance, a commitment to make it a jewel once again.
    http://www.freep.com/article/20131210/NEWS01/312100128/Belle-Isle-Mayor-Dave-Bing-volunteers

  56. nancy said on December 10, 2013 at 4:41 pm

    I don’t know anyone who thinks it’s a bad idea. Of course, I don’t know anyone on the Detroit city council. I have a recreation passport — 11 whole dollars a year — and am looking forward to visiting as it transitions to state management.

  57. LAMary said on December 10, 2013 at 5:52 pm

    We don’t have an inexpensive HMO option anymore, but when we did my kid (same one) racked up over 11k in bills with a bike accident and all but 75 dollars was paid by the HMO.

  58. Deborah said on December 10, 2013 at 6:11 pm

    I’m embarrassed to admit that we neglected to get my daughter signed up for Obamacare over Thanksgiving. We just got caught up with other things and knew we could do it when my husband gets here on the 18th for the holidays. I can’t wait to see what it will entail, because of her pre-existing neurological condition she has never had healthcare insurance (even when she was a kid her father’s insurance and mine wouldn’t cover her), she has only been covered for a couple of years when she worked at a grocery store as a wine specialist and was a union member. Yay unions. I have paid out of pocket for her healthcare all of my life. It hasn’t been horrible except when she has required surgery, which hasn’t been that often, but still. The stress of knowing that eventually she might have something major turn up hasn’t been exactly peaceful to think about. I only hope the Republicans don’t pull the rug out from us. I keep asking my rightwing sister how she feels about her niece losing coverage when she starts complaining about the ACA and mostly she just doesn’t respond. Once she told me that my daughter seems perfectly healthy that she walks everywhere and quickly, so what do I have to complain about. Then she said Little Bird could get care at any emergency room as if that was the answer.

  59. Prospero said on December 10, 2013 at 6:21 pm

    Tila Tequila is one of those Asian girls that Nicholas Kristoff so heroically rescued, single-handedly, from sexuall bondage in Bangkok, but he doesn’t like to talk about it, right?

    Actually she is a particularly nasty piece of reality TeeVee trailer trash from the first wave of MTV’s abandonment of music altogether. She had a show similar to Flav’s where contestant vied for her favor. The twist was that the contestants were both male and female, anatomically, or at least played those parts on TeeVee. If you know how creepy and repulsive Flava Flav is, multiply x2 and you get Ms. Tequila. Those two make Russell Brand look clean-cut.

    I’d be worried that Goober-nor Snidely might sell Belle Isle to the Kochs for some campaign funding, and Randolph and Mortimer would move their slag heap there.

    Just made it through another grocery store run with no ba-rum-pa-pum-pa. Sometimes life is charmed. Sometimes you get dogs barking Jingle Bells when they should be playing cards and drinking toddies and juleps. Or Tila Tequilas. And I surely hate these 5:20 sunsets. Ride down, 70 ambient, hot like the surface of Mercury inside my rain jacket. Ride back in the gloaming, feels like a walk-in overloading.

    Latest issue of RS says the Ron Burgundy sequel is the most eagerly anticipated comedy sequel ever. I weep for my species. Will Farrell vs. Ghostbusters? Please. Exquisite wit vs. unarmed flaccid putz. And RS year-end music rankings? I’d rather have anything on the best reissues list (I have two, Dylan and Fogerty) than anything on the best new (have none, Might by Haim’s album after seeing their SNL performance and all the Gaga and Miley fans compaining on the net that they aren’t pretty and, like, girls aren’t supposed to play guitars, y’know).

    Gifts: I wish every child in the world would have a personal CD or MP3 recording of Peter and the Wolf with David Bowie narrating. Or the Boris Karloff version. Or the Leonard Bernstein. Or the Dylan Thomas. Or Shane McGowan. Actually there are some fine recordings of A Child’s Christmas in Wales that beat one more maudlin, set chewing rendition of The Story of Zuzu’s Petals. God I loathe that movie. I’ve given some thought to making randoomly cut and spliced versions of the Jean Shephard Christmas story. I mean, that’s how everybody watches it anyway. Some scenes would go in there several times apiece: Ralphie beating snot out of Scut Farkus, the Bumpus’s dogs, fa-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra, the pink bunny jammies.

    For a minute, I thought Nancy has a recreational passport to Detroit City Council. I once worked for a Boston TeeVee guy covering the Mass Statehouse. It was entertaining alright.

  60. Connie said on December 10, 2013 at 6:26 pm

    Yoko is a terrorist?

  61. Henry "Hank" Chapin said on December 10, 2013 at 6:46 pm

    You get so many comments it’s unbelievable. What’s your secret? Taylor’s “Silent Night” is a hoot, although they should stay off the floor. My main point is to warn one and all that my dentist gets much of his broken-tooth business from unpopped popcorn kernels. Weed them ut before serving!

  62. Sherri said on December 10, 2013 at 6:52 pm

    “Care at an emergency room” does not mean what they think it means. ER’s, contrary to what ACA opponents seem to believe, are not required to treat you; they’re required to make sure you’re stable enough not to die. They are not required, for example, to do the surgery required to fix LAMary’s son’s wrist, were he to be uninsured. Which could be the difference between crippling pain and full function…

    (says someone with a plate and ten screws in her wrist)

  63. Prospero said on December 10, 2013 at 7:01 pm

    Mandela as terrorist? Is there documentation of his having participated in a violent act with the intention of frightening people into accepting his politics. That’s a workable definition of terr His wife Winnie? Sure as shit. After he was imprisoned, she sort of invented the gasoline and used tire necklace that came to be named for her. That woman needed some Stelazine. Mr. Mandela seemed to follow Mahatma rather than Indira as a Gandhi referrent. For a modern head of state that was an unabashed terriss, look no farther than Moshe Dayan and Itzhak Rabin, who founded the Irgun. In Mosaic terms, irony can be funny or immensely sad, depending upon whose ox is gored. And though he’s gone, I’m sticking with those official Shrub spellings of terr and terriss. Fewer keystrokes, fewer typos.

    That Fogerty album I mentioned is called Wrote a Song for Everyone, and it’s not really a reissue. Fogerty re-recorde performances of some of his greatest songs with hand-picked collaborators. He redoes one of his greatest songs, Almost Saturday Night with Keith Urban, and it is revelatory. A few years ago I saw the two of them on the CMT cable show Crossroads and it was electric. This collaboration is ecstatic. The album has a version of Lodi done with Fogerty’s sons, Who’ll Stop the Rain with Seger, and the best Proud Mary ever, with Jennifer Hudson as Tina and Alan Toussaint with an all-star N’awlins brass band. Any Creedence fan or John Fogerty fan, and I think any music fan will find this album energizing, like dancing around the place. It’ll make you smile until youface hurts.

    The Dylan Self Portrait reissue is perfect for those that love Dylan (like me obviously, I know all the words to Desolation Row and Gates of Eden), but it is also something that would be perfect for people that were always put off by his abrasive style (not me obviously, we jam abrasive). n

    Adn what I said before about Prokofiev’s Peter and the Wolf? The collaboration betwee Saint -Saens and Ogden Nash is another wonderful piece of music that kids will like. Also, the recording of the Socerer’s Apprentice with Night on Bald Mountain are a little scary but great for kids. If that’s too scary, th Fantasia soundtrack is great too.

  64. Prospero said on December 10, 2013 at 7:11 pm

    Sherri@62: And if they decide to in the ER, they will have specialists appraise your case, and if you are some dipshit young invincible and and you have the Earl Scheib leeches and bandaids coverage, you will have diagnostic procedures that will cost enough you will need to be hospitalized when you see the bill that isn’t covered. Dumb FUCKERS. And somebody pays for everything that goes on in that ER and thereafter. Personally, Having been through this experience fairly recently, ambulance service should be a cosely controlled government service. Yeah airlifts to burn centers and trauma centers are costly. But are we about the sanctity of human life or are we runing death panels? When I was knocked off my bike and left bleeding and unconscious a year ago last 4th of July, I ended up being charged $450 for transportation to a hospital ER less than half a mile away. Had I been conscious, I would have refused and ridden in the Sheriff
    ‘s car for free.

  65. LAMary said on December 10, 2013 at 7:31 pm

    You’re right Sherri. I consider myself lucky I’m insured. Even if I work here I don’t get any breaks on treatment. I suspect the nurses and techs in the ER were a little nicer to my son because he’s my son, but they were giving him anything special. Just a little more attention maybe.

  66. Dexter said on December 10, 2013 at 8:27 pm

    prospero, I bought “Self Portrait” upon its release 43 years ago…still have it. Never mentioned by ANYONE for all these years, perhaps it does not have any redeeming wisdom in any of the lyrics, but dammitt, it’s a good listen, and I still play it once in a while. And, since I brought up Belle Isle…

    “One evening for pleasure I rambled to view
    The fair fields all alone
    Down by the banks of Loch Eiron
    Where beauty and pleasure were known
    I spied a fair maid at her labour
    Which caused me to stay for a while
    And I thought of a goddess to beauty
    Bloomin’ bright star of Bright Isle
    I humbled myself to her beauty
    “Fair maiden, where do you belong?
    Are you from heaven descended
    AnnotateAbiding in Cupid’s fair throne?”

    “Young man, I will tell you a secret
    It’s true I’m a maid that is poor
    And to part from my vows and my promise
    Is more than my heart can endure
    Therefore I remain at my service
    And go through all my hardship and toil
    And wait for the lad that has left me
    All alone on the banks of Belle Isle.”
    “Young maiden I wish not to banter
    It’s true I come here in disguise
    I came here to fulfill our last promise
    And hope to give you a surprise

    I’ve known you’re a maid I love dearly
    And you’ve been in my heart all the while
    For me there is no other damsel
    Than my blooming bright star of Belle Isle.”

  67. Dexter said on December 10, 2013 at 8:41 pm

    I just checked my lottery ticket. For the first time in 2013, I won…$41.50. A whole year of losers to win forty-one bucks. Boxed a three digit number. An hour ago I dropped exactly $51 of gasoline into my van. Still in the hole! :)

  68. Basset said on December 10, 2013 at 8:51 pm

    Hmmm, I know that one as “Ireland’s Green Shore.”

    No popcorn poppers here but we do have a black iron frying pan on top of the stove right now which a black iron frying pan expert told me dates back at least to the mid 30s and possibly to the 19-teens. My only relic of my South Carolina grandmother, widowed millworker with nine kids.

  69. Connie said on December 10, 2013 at 9:56 pm

    I too have lost the Little Drummer Boy challenge, and this version was voices plus beat box.

  70. Deborah said on December 10, 2013 at 10:11 pm

    Now that we’ve lost the Drummer Boy Challenge my daughter and I are vigilant as to when we will hear it again, we are convinced that we won’t, that we were just unlucky but I’m sure we are being completely naive, it’s way too early in the season and there are way too many shops around us that will play it repeatedly. We’ll see.

  71. Sherri said on December 10, 2013 at 10:49 pm

    I lost the Drummer Boy Challenge tonight; my husband and I were out at dinner celebrating his birthday, and it was playing at the restaurant.

    (BTW, Happy Birthday, Charlotte!)

  72. Brandon said on December 12, 2013 at 1:39 pm

    Who would name their child “Tia”, anyways.–coozledad

    In the 1989 John Candy movie Uncle Buck, there was a sullen teenage girl named Tia. And her parents were upper-middle class WASPs. (Directed by John Hughes, naturally.)

    …from the first wave of MTV’s abandonment of music altogether.–prospero

    MTV started out showing videos almost exclusively. In the late eighties it began airing programs like Remote Control and Just Say Julie (very underrated, check it out). The Real World premiered a few years later and its first few seasons were the best.

    But now, almost all the shows on MTV are dreck.

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