Man, this may be my last year lifeguarding. Even for an early riser, a 5 a.m. alarm four days a week* is…a lot, as the kids say. My certification is good through next spring, so we’ll see, but I’m tired of being tired.
Spring break is in a few more weeks. We’ll see how I feel then.
* On the fifth weekday, the alarm goes off at 4:20 a.m.
Anyway, there’s more than the usual bloggage, presented with some guilt feelings, because paywalls. Here’s a column I wrote for the Freep this week, but it’s definitely paywalled and few of you are Freep subscribers, or even live in the state of Michigan. It’s about my feelings on the anthropomorphizing of animals, especially pets, and that link goes to the un-paywalled version.
And here’s another Freep column, not by me, that simply enraged me. Why? Getta loada this:
When a colleague and I arrived at the North Lake Processing Center in Baldwin, Michigan, on Feb. 24 to visit a potential client in U.S. Customs and Immigration detention, we were completely unprepared for the indignity that awaited: Being told that we had to take off our bras.
Yes, this is a lawyer writing, and it goes on:
Things got even weirder when I tried to make it through a metal detector. After removing my coat and shoes, the machine beeped for a third time as I tried to pass through. That’s when the screener asked if I was wearing an underwire bra. When I said “yes,” she informed me that my bra was the problem, and that I could not get in without passing the screening.
“I can give you scissors to cut the wire out,” she said coldly. Given the price of bras, that wasn’t happening. I headed to the car and angrily flung my bra off. My colleague, also wearing an underwire bra, did the same. Braless, we were finally allowed in.
I’d have flung it in the screener’s face, personally, or maybe wrapped it around her neck.
The cruelty is the point, as we say.
Finally, a fabulous piece from the London Review of Books, looking at two of them (books, that is), one on Randy Andy and his grifting family, the other Virginia Giuffre’s memoir of being trafficked to him, and many others, by Jeffrey Epstein. The cheek of these people:
Years ago, before it was fashionable, some of the youngsters in the family were calling Andrew ‘the Nonce’, and there was general dismay at the Yorks’ reckless avarice. The British royal fantasy has a few sustaining mythologies, and one of them is dignity, a quality defined, after Andy and Fergie, more by its absence. The late queen can be held responsible for much, but nobody could accuse her of seeming to enjoy her role. For the Yorks, however, enjoyment was everything, and the notion of royal sacrifice, arguably a red herring in the House of Saxe-Coburg and Gotha, was finally obliterated by their actions.
…The Yorks charged Hello! magazine a quarter of a million quid for pics of their ‘homelife’. They took £126,000 from the Daily Express for an interview. She charged £50,000 for her vague involvement in a film, Young Victoria, and signed on to start the second leg of the Whitbread Round the World Yacht Race in Montevideo, demanding £38,000 worth of first-class air tickets to get there. While other poor buggers in the family were opening jumble sales in Inverness, Andy and Fergie were sniffing out freebies in the dodgiest corners of the world, as confirmed in Lownie’s remarkable catalogue of half-hidden truths.
Spoiler: The Andy-sired princesses are no better.
OK, then. Wednesday is my 4:20 alarm, so I’m going to wrap this, pour another glass of wine and go to bed early. Really early. Happy midweek, all.
ROGirl said on March 11, 2026 at 6:02 am
What a brilliant takedown of those shameless, destructive, greedy, over-privileged grifters. The Gatsby quote has been on my mind with respect to the shameless, destructive, greedy, over-privileged grifters and wannabe royal family on this side of the pond.
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Brett Webb said on March 11, 2026 at 8:22 am
“jumble sales in Inverness” is a wonderful, evocative phrase. We had quite the discussion over at Edroso’s place about it. One of my contributions was ” Last night I dreamt I went to the jumble sale at Inverness again”
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Jeff Borden said on March 11, 2026 at 9:41 am
Hmm. The Yorks sound a lot like the tRumps, but the royals are penny ante players compared to the Orange King and his court. The tRumps have added $3 to $4 billion in net worth since the waddling codswallop returned to defile the White House. American exceptionalism!
Yesterday, I zombied through my day on less than 5 hours sleep and felt like I was coming down with the flu. A friendly gummy last night helped me get a solid 8 hours. I feel like I could run a marathon.
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Icarus said on March 11, 2026 at 10:51 am
From the previous post, congrats to Sherri for 24 years sober.
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Dexter Friend said on March 11, 2026 at 3:15 pm
As a fellow trudger, happy birthday Sherri. As I cannot tolerate hard metal folding chairs any longer, I still am in The Program via my websites I visit, the podcasts, the telephone, and especially, The Grapevine monthly, which I have read every month for 33/3 years.
A battle royale: One Battle… or Bugonia. One thing is a lock: Jessie Buckley, Best Actress.
I watched it 2 days ago, having dismissed it so long. I am still stunned, blown away. She is so damn good. Hamnet.
Sean Penn may get BSA, Leo, possible BA.
Teyana Taylor will edge out Amy Madigan for BSactress.
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ROGirl said on March 11, 2026 at 4:28 pm
Dexter, I watched Hamnet on Sunday and Jessie Buckley was amazing, she is a virtual lock for the Oscar. Also watched Song Sung Blue and it was better than I thought it would be. Kate Hudson was surprisingly good, and she can sing.
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Ann said on March 11, 2026 at 4:35 pm
Hmm. Drug sniffing dog sat down by my daughter, age 18, wearing birkenstocks and denim overalls, recently back from Amsterdam. Thirty minutes later they blamed it on her Noxema (which they’d run a pencil through) and sent us on our way. Perhaps a Clever Hans?
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Suzanne said on March 11, 2026 at 4:51 pm
I agree completely about Jesse Buckley’s performance in Hamnet. I had read the book and expected to be let down by the movie but it is incredible. I don’t think I have sobbed over a movie that much since watching Sophie’s Choice while pregnant (which was a really stupid idea, I am aware). It is beautiful, gut wrenching, and emotional and Buckley brings her character to life in a way I have rarely seen an actor do.
As to Randy Andy & Fergie’s daughters, well, all I can say is that they did not inherit even the most modest bits of good looks that the royal family may possess.
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Julie Robinson said on March 11, 2026 at 6:30 pm
Did anyone see the Jessie Buckley and Josh O’Connor version of Romeo and Juliet filmed during Covid times? PBS ran it; modern dress, stripped back, but all you need is those words and two such powerful actors.
This year I haven’t seen a single one of the best picture nominees. Guess I’m an old fart now.
Nancy, almost nothing could induce me to get up that early five days a week. I found retiree hours very easy to slide into. I hope at least you get to swim when the next shift arrives.
I read the Andrew and Fergie story yesterday and thought they both should be locked up, maybe the daughters too. Time for all the royals to go. There’s a play about that, too; King Charles III, in which they all have to go live in Council flats. It started the always fabulous Tim Pigott-Smith, RIP .
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Dexter Friend said on March 11, 2026 at 6:56 pm
I rarely do this, but tonight I am watching Hamnet again. I did watch Train Dreams twice; that is another great film which will only get a whisper or total neglect in LA Sunday night. Why the movie is named that is puzzling. It’s about a hard-working lumberjack whose life is about lost love and hardship.
The Spectrum man just left…he installed another new router, so much faster! Yeah, right. So far, slow as proverbial molasses. Sheeeee-itt. (My tribute to the recently departed Isiah Whitlock.)
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Candlepick said on March 11, 2026 at 6:57 pm
Seconding that Romeo and Juliet. Worth every effort to see it. Juliet’s mother was played by Tasmin Grieg, and an absolutely chilling clip of them is widely available.
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Colleen said on March 11, 2026 at 10:44 pm
I get up at 4 a.m. 4 days a week. I work 4 ten hour shifts, 5a to 3:30p, so I have Fridays off. And yes, I work from home. Couldn’t do this schedule with a commute. I’ve never been a morning person, but I’m getting better at it.
My mom’s funeral was today. The last few days have been strange. Lots of driving between Tampa and Citrus county, which is where my parents spent their retirement. I think I’m still trying to get used to the whole idea of her being gone forever…..
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MarkH said on March 11, 2026 at 11:40 pm
Condolences, Colleen. Just got back from Atlanta and what is likely my last visit with my fading oldest sister, 84, so your loss registered with me. Also, your schedule is remarkably like mine. And I’m supposed to be retired. Agree on Jessie Buckley; she anchored Hamnet. Should win.
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Julie Robinson said on March 12, 2026 at 8:03 am
Colleen, I’m so sorry about your mom. Will your dad be okay on his own, or will that be yet another walk on the journey no one wants to take?
My mom’s latest tests revealed low bone marrow production. She hasn’t decided if she wants to pursue treatment.
Candlepick, Tamsin Greig is reliably wonderful in everything.
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Mark P said on March 12, 2026 at 9:48 am
My sympathies, Colleen. It’s a different world after a parent dies.
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Jeff Gill said on March 12, 2026 at 10:07 am
Colleen, grace & peace to you. Today is six years since my father’s unexpected death (if one can say that about an 85 year old), and it’s still an intermittent jolt. Then going to see my mother tomorrow who doesn’t recall him at all, or me most days, but is content so I’m fine with that. Her knowing who she is and who I am and being furious about things is not something worth wishing for.
As best as my sister & I can tell, it’s 1952, and she’s in Lincoln Hall at Eastern Illinois State University, and she’s content. Mostly non-verbal now, but smiling when she’s not looking baffled.
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Sherri said on March 12, 2026 at 12:29 pm
My condolences, Colleen.
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Dave said on March 12, 2026 at 12:36 pm
I was struck yesterday looking at nn.c history that our hostess some ten years ago was thinking about giving up this blog, as they were commonly called then, because she had run out of things to write about. Glad she recovered from that stray thought. The one occupation group I participated in has gone through some drastic change and most of us are retired now but I miss it, not my old job, the group. One of the main participants recently remarried his wife that they had mutually divorced some thirty years ago and it must be very good because he hasn’t posted since. Neither of them had married others in the meantime. But I stray.
Jeff, my mother was mostly stuck in her senior year of high school or sometimes she was wondering how many children she had and who were we?
Colleen, my sympathies, even when you know it’s coming, it’s hard.
Sherri, that’s great, all I can say.
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Sherri said on March 12, 2026 at 2:17 pm
I’m fascinated by the whole shoe thing with the Trumpies. What I don’t get is, if they think they need to wear his stupid shoes, why don’t they just preemptively get their own pairs in the right size? Why wait for him to complain about their shoes, ask for their shoe size, feel compelled to lie and tell him a bigger shoe size than you actually wear, and then have to clomp around in clown shoes?
I guess what little brain they have is devoted to coming up with sick burns to own the libs that might impress their boss, so there aren’t any neurons left for anything else.
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Sherri said on March 12, 2026 at 3:41 pm
The Washington legislature just passed a 9.9% millionaire tax. Starting on Jan 2028, a marginal 9.9% tax rate will be charged on incomes over $1 million. At present, Washington has no income tax, and this will certainly be challenged in courts.
Of course, this has generated the usual chorus of “I’m leaving the state” declarations. Howard Schultz, the Starbucks billionaire, announced that he’s off to Florida, to which everyone said “Good riddance.” He’s blamed for Seattle losing their NBA team to Oklahoma City.
But if you’re a more ordinary millionaire, a senior Microsoft or Amazon person who makes their annual million in a combination of stock grants and salary, where are you going to move to make that kind of money? It’s possible to work remotely, but you’re not going to get the same compensation, nor are you likely to get promoted as fast. You can get a job in Silicon Valley with similar or higher comp, but housing is even more expensive, and California’s marginal tax rate for millionaires is 13.5%.
When you’re so rich, you don’t need to work, or when your work doesn’t require network effects, then maybe you move for tax purposes. But there’s a reason that Silicon Valley and the Seattle area are so expensive; because people want to work here to be at the center of what’s happening. Likewise for finance and NYC, London, Dubai.
(Currently, we make more than a million a year, but my husband is likely going to retire sometime this year, probably after September. Even if he weren’t, I’d happily pay 9.9% to stop funding the state with sales tax.)
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Brandon said on March 12, 2026 at 6:13 pm
Would you say the sales tax is regressive?
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David C said on March 12, 2026 at 6:51 pm
We have a guy running for Governor who claims he’ll eliminate the state income tax. He doesn’t, of course, say what would replace it. Probably cutting “waste, fraud, and inefficiency”. The same guy says he’ll be a strong leader like President Trump. Good luck with that. Read the room, dude.
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Suzanne said on March 12, 2026 at 7:29 pm
God help us.
“Ultimate Fighting Championship (UFC) athletes will be training agents of the Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) this week, both organisations say.”
https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c743emjmnrro
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Julie Robinson said on March 12, 2026 at 8:14 pm
Not to brag, David C, but our governor is bravely trying to eliminate all those burdensome real estate taxes. Florida already doesn’t have state income taxes. Government will run on…well, his plan was about as thorough as Republican healthcare alternatives. He doesn’t suffer many defeats but that was a bridge too far for the Legislature.
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Sherri said on March 12, 2026 at 8:35 pm
Yes, sales tax is regressive. If we’re all paying 10%* sales tax on our purchases, that represents a larger fraction of income for poorer people than richer people.
Because sales tax is so regressive, states that rely on it often carve out exemptions on things like groceries, though what is and isn’t taxed at a grocery store is complex and changes often. Some states will also have sales tax holidays at back to school times.
*Washington’s state sales tax is 6.5%, but King County and Redmond sales taxes bring the rate I pay to 10.4%.
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Colleen said on March 12, 2026 at 10:08 pm
Thank you for the good wishes. My dad is doing ok…as ok as one can be after almost 62 years of marriage. Luckily, he is in relatively good health, and still very sharp. He has some friends nearby, and he’s already looking to adopt an adult cat.
My sister and I spent the day going thru mom’s things, keeping, donating,and pitching. It’s just been a really weird week, and I’m not sure how I’m processing it all….
Julie beat me to it regarding our gov’s idea to eliminate property taxes. And just how are we supposed to pay for schools, police and fire, road construction, etc. We DO need some property tax relief, to be sure. Fully half of our mortgage payment goes to taxes and insurance. We are in Hillsborough county, and pay more than twice what my parents pay in Citrus county. It is a rude awakening after my 500 bucks a year in Indiana…
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Brandon said on March 12, 2026 at 11:14 pm
@Colleen: My condolences.
@Sherri: Thank you.
Re: UFC fighters training FBI agents. This isn’t quite the same, but … https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/XXX_(2002_film)
NSA Agent Augustus Gibbons suggests sending Xander “XXX” Cage, an extreme sports professional wanted for unlawful protesting, citing his lack of ties to the US government. Under Gibbons’ supervision, Cage passes two tests, one involving stopping a fake armed robbery, and another where he and 2 other potential candidates are dropped into Colombia where they’re thrown into an actual conflict between the Cartel and the Colombian Army. Xander was given the options to take a job or go to prison, in which Xander reluctantly accepts the contract.
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Mark P said on March 12, 2026 at 11:49 pm
I had a pleasant surprise today. As some of you may know, we just had a special election on Tuesday to replace Marjorie Taylor Greene in the Georgia 14th congressional district, one of the reddest districts in Georgia, if not the country. I have a regular Thursday lunch with some of my relatives, who, like almost everyone around here, are Republicans. It was my cousin, her husband, both over 80, and my cousin’s brother, my cousin also of course, who is around 70. My older cousin volunteered that she and her husband had voted for Shawn Harris, the Democrat. My other cousin said he did, too. He also said that he voted for Trump in 2016, but not the next two times. He said Trump lied too much.
It was a real surprise to me. Maybe it means something for the midterms. Unfortunately, although Harris got the highest percentage of the votes, beating Trump’s pick, he did not get more than the total of the rest of the very large Republican field. So, if all those Republican votes end up going to the shitgibbon’s pick, Harris won’t win. It will be disappointing, but not surprising for this district. We have more than our share of morons.
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Deborah said on March 13, 2026 at 10:06 am
Interesting story Mark P about your cousins. I had a similar experience with my rightwing sister’s youngest daughter a couple of days ago, she sent me a rare email asking what people in NM thought about the Epstein situation and his ranch there. She went on to say she was disgusted with the whole Epstein situation, that she didn’t believe he killed himself in his cell, etc. She criticized Trump which surprised me. She voted for Trump at least this last time so it sounds like Epstein and other things have made her sour on trump. It seemed important to her to let me know how she felt now, she very much knows I’m a Democrat, maybe she’s feeling shame or at least regret about how she voted. I thought it was a good sign and my response to her was encouraging her doubts but I’m cautious about expecting too much.
Her sister, the middle liberal niece and I have become quite close over the last couple of years and she was encouraged to hear that her younger sister seemed to be backing out of MAGA. Maybe things are changing, finally. The oldest sister of the three is very MAGA as is their mother, my sister. I’m wondering if i’m going to hear similar stories from them as well. Oh happy days if I do.
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Suzanne said on March 13, 2026 at 10:28 am
Sorry for your loss, Colleen.
I have only my mother left. My dad had a stoke which caused dementia, my father-in-law Parkinson’s, and my mother-in-law was debilitated by back and heart problems. They all were suffering so the end was not unexpected and ended their suffering. What I miss most, though, is being able to ask them about family and friends from the past. There is so much I don’t know or don’t remember and there is increasingly no one to ask. I try to get my mom to talk about her childhood but she’s not very forthcoming. It’s not dementia that we can tell; I think that at 91, she is simply done with life but doesn’t have enough self-awareness to grasp that. She sits in a recliner and watches mindless tv in the nursing home all day and seems perfectly fine with that, fine with as little interaction as possible. It’s very frustrating and sad to witness but it’s her choice.
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alex said on March 13, 2026 at 11:35 am
Colleen you have my deepest sympathy. I lost my mother a few years ago and the world just isn’t the same without her, although I’m glad she was spared having to live through Trump 2.0. Dad’s still hanging on at 98. We give him things to look forward to, like his annual summer trip to Canada with family, and Sunday dinners at my house followed by watching 60 Minutes. He’s so insistent on keeping everything the same that he hasn’t allowed me or my brother to go through Mom’s things.
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basset said on March 13, 2026 at 12:13 pm
I have flown on a US military aircraft similar to the one that just crashed, long ago and far away but memorable.
It’s a tanker, set up to transfer fuel to other planes in flight through a long probe which comes out of the rear bottom and matches with a receiver on the other plane, or even helicopter.
The probe is controlled by a single crew member lying feet first on a narrow bench in the back floor and surrounded by glass panels; I got to occupy that position for awhile and it was quite an experience, pilot has to do some really careful flying to keep everything in place.
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Deborah said on March 13, 2026 at 12:50 pm
Watching aging parents of aging adult children has been an interesting observation and in most cases sad. As I’ve said here many times before my mother died when I was 14, so I don’t have the experience of having her in my life as I aged. My father died when I was 40, he was 80 then. My husband’s mother lived to be 102 so she was in our lives for many years and she was lovely but not my mother. My husband’s father died when he was 64 when my husband was in his late 30s and I didn’t know him then, they didn’t get along well, his father was a philanderer who wasn’t very good to his wife and his family but my husband says he was always cordial to his dad and showed respect even though he didn’t feel respect for him.
So many families have skeletons and act on the outside as if they don’t, my ex’s family had a lot of skeletons that they hid with religiosity which is not uncommon I’ve found. Families can be weird, actually most seem to be when you can look closely.
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ROGirl said on March 13, 2026 at 1:32 pm
When I saw my mother in the assisted living home she was planning to visit her father, who died in the early 1950s. She knew she had a daughter named Rosanne, but when I told her I was Rosanne she gave me a blank look. She remembered my father, but not her 2nd husband. She had been divorced from my father for over 30 years. My mother tried to shed her past, but couldn’t escape it. She told people Charlie was going to visit. Charlie was her older brother. When my brother visited her, everybody thought he was Charlie.
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Sherri said on March 13, 2026 at 2:25 pm
We’ve gone all winter with no snow and not much cold weather, and now here in mid-March, with everything budding and the cherry trees starting to bloom, we wake up to several inches of snow. Still snowing where I am (about 400’ elevation), will probably switch over to rain at some point.
This place has the most interesting weather of any place I’ve lived. I’ve learned about convergence zones, rain shadows, and temperature inversions, for example.
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Mark P said on March 13, 2026 at 3:42 pm
I have an atmospheric science degree so I’m familiar with things like inversions, but it’s still interesting to actually see them. We live on a mountain about 500 feet above the surrounding lowland. One winter morning it was 10 Fahrenheit degrees colder at the bottom of the mountain than at our house. We regularly have warmer nights than the “official” low because of inversions. It’s also interesting to see the outside temperature display in the car go down about two degrees when we climb up the mountain in the day due to the normal decrease in temperature with increase in altitude.
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Sherri said on March 13, 2026 at 4:25 pm
The convergence zone is responsible for most of the interesting weather we get. A strong west flow of air off the Pacific gets split by the Olympics then hits the Cascades and meets again near where we live, resulting in thunderstorms sometimes, hail other times, snow, or just rain. It’s localized to north King County and southern Snohomish County, though the bounds depends on various factors.
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Julie Robinson said on March 13, 2026 at 4:38 pm
My Garmin fitness watch tells me I’m between 158 and 313 feet below sea level, all while being in my house. So I take all its measurements with a grain of salt.
Mom is the last parent on both sides. She has her affairs mostly in order, but we have to track down some stock. It was from a place she worked that subsequently changed hands several times. She doesn’t have certificates or letters or an account number, but they find her bank account for premiums every year. It’s been on my to do list for weeks.
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Jeff Gill said on March 13, 2026 at 7:03 pm
My father-in-law, born 1929, had six bank accounts, three retirement funds, and odd chunks of stock in seven different companies… and I found a bit (just under 10 K!) in an unclaimed funds account because I just started wondering one night, from a stock which closed but he didn’t return some paperwork when the merge and fold happened, just as his cognition was going south. He just didn’t trust the FDIC to keep him safe, but I wonder still if there was another few hundred or couple thousand somewhere we didn’t figure out. Ah well.
My wife only finished sorting it all out a few months back in 2025, and he died in December of 2023. My mother’s estate will be simpler, as my sister & I have been liquidating it to cover her care; I suspect she will live one month past where her money runs out, which is about August as billing stands.
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Deborah said on March 13, 2026 at 7:45 pm
Living by the lake in Chicago has been interesting temperature wise. Sometimes when I’m walking home from somewhere west and get about a block away from home, it suddenly gets a lot cooler, very suddenly and very noticeable, like a wall of cooler air. Cooler by the lake as they say.
In Santa Fe our condo is in a spot at the dead end of a lane, next to a field and it always has different temps and wind conditions than just barely a block away, a micro climate which can be annoying when trying to figure out if you need to wear a jacket. And it’s always nice to take a drive up in the mountains in the summertime, it’s at least 10º different than down below, and in the winter it seems much more than 10º colder up there.
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Julie Robinson said on March 13, 2026 at 8:18 pm
Grandma likewise, having lived through the bank failures of the 20’s and 30’s. So whenever they traveled she’d open up an account in the local bank. I think they found 25 or so, who knows if there were more. I’ve got Mom down to two banks, two brokerage accounts, and this phantom stock, so we’ve come a long way. She lives with us and doesn’t have a car, credit card or even a phone, no bill accounts to close. There is, however, the matter of the gigantic storage unit which she hasn’t visited in over a year. That’ll be fun.
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ROY EDROSO said on March 14, 2026 at 4:54 pm
I wouldn’t get up that early to SWIM, let alone lifeguard. (I cannot swim.)
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Dorothy said on March 15, 2026 at 9:28 am
We don’t usually set an alarm, but most mornings we are up by 5 or 5:30. We help with our granddaughter in the morning, to get her on the school bus. Our son and his wife recently divorced; she moved out in October and is renting a house a couple of miles away. They share custody. Both of them work full time and both drive a good distance to work – hence our helping in the morning. Liv gets dropped off at 6:20 or so on the days she is with her mom. You do what you need to do when it’s family – and not just with grandkids, as many of you have shared in these comments above mine.
Connie I’m sorry about your mom. Mine has been gone almost nine years now. I have conversations in my head with her all the time. Her sage advice and observations have stayed with me and are a great help.
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Deborah said on March 15, 2026 at 11:14 am
Dorothy, I think it’s cool to shorten Olivia to Liv. It’s catchy.
Yesterday they turned the Chicago river green and it was crazy walking around anywhere near there. Although this year I didn’t see a lot of vomit on the sidewalks, maybe people are drinking less these days.
58º today and down to 11º on Tuesday. A highrise building near us had a window blow out the other day and it’s still cordoned off because they expect a piece of granite to fall. The older tall buildings around us will have that happen more as the winds have increased because of climate change and they weren’t built to withstand those. Scary.
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