We’re having a stretch of glorious weather, at least if you’re not a farmer. Those people are never happy with any weather, and ours, lately, has been dry. I don’t think it’s rained since before Labor Day, and the next chance of it — and only a chance — is a week from Tuesday. The skies have been clear and sunny, temperatures topping out around 80 in late afternoon.

Essentially, I’m living in Los Angeles without the traffic. At least for a while.

The weather helps moderate the natural impulse to bang one’s head on the wall. I suppose many of us saw Pete Buttigieg’s comments on the chat shows Sunday, making the very sharp observation that all this talk about dogs and cats and so forth is just dust thrown up to get us to stop talking about Project 2025, et al. I think he’s right. So I’m going to enjoy the weather, ignore the dust in the air, and keep sending a few bucks, here and there, to Democrats.

As for the “assassination attempt” yesterday, well. More will be revealed. But until then, we obviously need to build a wall around golf courses, allow access only through solid-steel gates, and arm caddies.

I keep thinking about November 7, 2020. I’ve written in detail about it before, but the day remains in my brain as the goal for 2024. Vote, win the election, then go play miniature golf on a warm day.

Let’s see if it holds out.

It was a good weekend, in the sense that I got a bunch of stuff crossed off my to-do list for this week, which means I can fritter a little time away here and there as it unwinds. I’ve resolved to try my hand at darning a couple of tiny moth holes in a good cashmere sweater I don’t want to retire just yet. No, never darned before, but that’s why God gave us YouTube. We’ll see how that goes.

Bloggage? Oh, let’s see:

Roy is very smart on the subtext of GOP messaging of late:

What you have to understand is that, while both misogyny and racism are important parts of MAGA, the policy itself is never as important as the hatred and disgust they can engender with them.

That’s why, on abortion, Trump can fudge and lie to his heart’s content. As I’ve explained, he’s worked it so that his fans understand he’s lying and wink at it — they know they’ve already gotten the result they wanted from the Trump Supreme Court, and that their desired further disempowerment and servitude of women relies more on getting the normies to help elect him than on politically dangerous shows of support for the fait accompli.

But his misogynist yap about E. Jean Carroll, Kamala Harris, et alia — and creepy fantasies about women aborting babies after birth — those are non-negotiable. MAGA must have those. Because they demonstrate something more important than policy, or even short-term electoral gain.

An entertaining read on the funeral home used by the rich and famous, in the NYT (gift link). I sent it to a friend here, also a funeral director. Of course he knew it well. A direct cremation there costs around $15K. I guess that’s to be expected. They embalmed Jackie Onassis in her own apartment, which just proves you can get anything delivered in New York.

And now, to work.

I have a friend — a wonderful person in so many ways — who gets upset by the news, so she ignores it. News always gets in over the transom one way or another, so she’s aware of who’s running for major offices in the state and country, etc., but she has some amazing gaps in her knowledge. Not long ago she expressed bafflement that there’s another bridge across the Detroit River under construction. Never mind that the debate over building it lasted years, the construction is visible from nearby freeways, from the riverwalk, and the bridge itself is nearing completion. This was in June:

How do you miss something like that, even if you don’t drive downriver all that often? I’m envious.

And yet, we all have our blind spots. Ask me who played in the last Super Bowl. I couldn’t tell y– Wait, yes I can. Taylor Swift’s boyfriend’s team vs. San Francisco, and Taylor’s BF’s team won. But the year before? It was…same teams. Everybody in Detroit was carping that NO ONE WANTS A REMATCH OF THOSE TEAMS, right? (See above: Some news comes in over the transom.) But the year before that? Forget about it.

All of which is to say, I feel like I’ve been marinating in far-right content for a while now. I’m not on Rumble and Telegram, but I do have a Truth Social account (BOR-ing), or did. So much of it is in the mainstream now, though. The Overton window has moved so far in that direction it’s around the corner of the house. So I read this story in the WashPost today, about how Trump is suggesting his assassination attempt maybe isn’t what it seems — i.e. stereotypical Troubled Young Loner seeks spotlight through violence — and nodded in recognition. Absolutely nothing surprising here:

On the first night after Donald Trump was injured in an assassination attempt in Butler, Pa., some supporters and allies, including campaign staff, immediately began blaming President Joe Biden and Democrats before any information was available about the shooter or his possible motive. Trump himself didn’t go there. In his first public statements after the July 13 shooting, Trump thanked law enforcement, offered condolences to the rallygoers killed and wounded, and called for unity.

But his tone changed in recent weeks, as the Republican presidential nominee began promoting conspiracy theories such as those that label the assassination attempt an “inside job” by government agencies or make up Democratic ties to lawyers representing the shooter’s parents. Trump and his running mate, Sen. JD Vance (R-Ohio), frequently portray the attempt as part of efforts by political opponents to prevent the former president from returning to power.

Melania’s recent contract negotiation must have called for something similar, because the ho’ wife* is carrying his water, too:

https://t.co/ZCTwZSqZND pic.twitter.com/KKA6anTEYC

— MELANIA TRUMP (@MELANIATRUMP) September 10, 2024

* obligatory disclaimer: Sex work is work. Also, hel-LO filters.

Any assassination is going to stir up conspiracies, and I’ll admit this one is weird in many ways, but one of the weirdest is how no medical team answered questions about the extent of Trump’s injuries. There was some blood, the panty-liner bandage at the convention, and now his ear shows zero sign of having been grazed by a bullet. And Trump continues to say he was “took a bullet the head” for freedom, or whatever.

I’d never say it didn’t happen, as some on the left do. But if we’re talking about people who we haven’t heard anything about in the days since? I’d include the guy who really did take a bullet to the head, for the crime of being a Front-Row Joe, or whatever you call the people who sit up front at Trump rallies. You know, ol’ what’s-his-name. :::Googling::: Corey Comperatore. Hilarious guy who posted videos about his desire to run over cyclists.

The week, it is ending. And next week will be better, unless it’s worse.

P.S. The new bridge will have a pedestrian/cycling lane, and won’t that be fun.

How does anybody keep up with the news these days? Just yesterday I was thinking I’m an empty cup, and then I opened my laptop and WHAM MAGA idiots say Haitians are eating cats and WHAM tropical storm Francine is bearing down on the WHAM debate stage set for WHAM that “Sound of Freedom” guy, who is being sued by a bunch of women for — quelle surprise — being a sexually aggressive creep.

Closed my laptop. Let the room grow quiet again. Took Wendy to the vet (enflamed gums). Picked up a novel (“Demon Copperhead”). Sometimes you have to unplug. Just for a little while.

It’s a shame that the so-called mainstream media have fired or bought out all their columnists (or hired terrible ones), because damn, there are people writing more or less for free who have a lot of smart things to say. This piece on the “sanewashing” of Trump is really good.

If it feels like half the electorate has gone mad, that’s in part because the press continues to fail to present Trump as he truly is. The average voter probably doesn’t spend much time watching clips of Trump’s rants or reading his unhinged screeds on social media. But they might consume reporting that consistently “sanewashes” his derangement.

The sketch comedy series Key and Peele had a bit where the calm, no-drama Barack Obama (Jordan Peele) would have his true thoughts conveyed through a boisterous, profane Anger Translator (Keegan-Michael Key). The press has functioned as Trump’s Sanity Translator, to far less amusing effect: They filter through his nonsensical, offensive gibberish and offer readers a sanitized version that’s more PR spin than actual journalism.

MAGA cultists might consider Trump the second coming, but many swing voters hold a more reasonable, if still inaccurate view: Yes, Trump’s a jerk, but he knows how to fix the economy. The reality is that Trump’s both a bigoted creep and a total buffoon who can barely string a coherent sentence together on policy.

The centerpiece is the word salad served at the New York Economic Club last week, after someone asked him what plans he had, if any, to make child care more affordable. The answer:

Well, I would do that, and we’re sitting down — you know, I was, uh, somebody, we had Sen. Marco Rubio and my daughter, Ivanka, was so, uh, impactful on that issue. It’s a very important issue.

But I think when you talk about the kind of numbers that I’m talking about, that — because child care is child care. It’s, couldn’t — you know, it’s something, you have to have it. In this country, you have to have it.

But when you talk about those numbers compared to the kind of numbers that I’m talking about by taxing foreign nations at levels that they’re not used to but they’ll get used to it very quickly. And it’s not going to stop them from doing business with us, but they’ll have a very substantial tax when they send product into our country.

Those numbers are so much bigger than any numbers that we’re talking about, including child care, that it’s gonna take care. We’re gonna have — I, I look forward to having no deficits within a fairly short period of time. Coupled with, uh, the reductions that I told you about on waste and fraud and all of the other things that are going on in our country — because I have to say with child care, I want to stay with childcare, but those numbers are small relative to the kind of economic numbers that I’m talking about, including growth.

But growth also headed up by what the plan is that I just, uh, that I just told you about. We’re gonna be taking in trillions of dollars, and as much as childcare is talked about as being expensive, it’s, relatively speaking, not very expensive compared to the kind of numbers we’ll be taking in.

We’re going to make this into an incredible country that can afford to take care of its people and then we’ll worry about the rest of the world. Let’s help other people. But we’re gonna take care of our country first. This is about America first. It’s about: Make America great again. We have to do it, because right now we’re a failing nation. So we’ll take care of it. Thank you. Very good question.

How do people — sane people, members of the fucking NYEC, sit and listen to this and not erupt in jeering afterward. Or just say, “I don’t understand. Please explain again.” The question-asker went on CNN later to complain. She should have complained to his orange face. But as the piece linked above points out, MSM reporters didn’t do much, or any, better. They reported this answer, maybe with an adjective like “jumbled,” as though it played by the rules. And as much as I admire those few soldiers left trying to fight this war, we need new rules of engagement. Because the old ones don’t make sense anymore.

I reckon we’ll have a lively pre-, during- and post-debate commentary here, so let it begin.

And just like that, the four-day downtown festival I worked is over. I slept in my own bed last night, not the RenCen Marriott, although there’s something to be said for awakening to a view of the Detroit River in dawn’s early light, the sign from Caesars Windsor reflected in the water, looking like spilled…blood, I guess. Appropriate for a gambling house, wagers being responsible for gallons, tankers of blood-spill through the ages.

In the Canadian fashion, that casino is non-smoking. Progress.

And for now, I plan to rest for two days, then turn my attention to another project. I hope that by Christmas, my workload will finally ease.

I’d forgotten what it’s like to be so busy you can’t pay attention to the news. Thursday night is about when I checked out, although being in a hotel room with cable, I was able to watch much of CNN’s interview when they replayed it through the weekend. It was amazingly dumb. The questions were all about prompting reactions to stupid shit various GOP blockheads have said. Why should Kamala Harris have to dignify Trump’s racist comments? Why should Tim Walz have to answer expressed ignorance about his own child? Fuck every last one of them.

As they say on the internet: WhY wOn’T ShE TaLK aBouT PoLiCy?

Fortunately, my room also had Netflix. So I could put on early “Sex and the City” and just let ’em roll as I dozed off.

Today, I have to clean-clean-clean the house before Alan’s sister arrives for a visit. So short shrift again, but I’m hoping things will settle down, soon.

The view from my window for four days:

Back in about 48 hours.

I’ve been seeing it here and there — maybe even in these comments — that there are fewer Trump yard signs in evidence, and this is maybe a hopeful sign. I, too, have noticed this. There’s the guy across the street and a few others here and there, but definitely not as many as ’16 and even ’20. However, I don’t think this is good news. I think it’s a sign of trench warfare. I think we’re just exhausted. Why bother with a yard sign? Is it going to change any minds? I don’t think so.

That said, I impulsively stopped at the Grosse Pointe Dems storefront and picked up two Harris/Walz signs, one of which is in my yard. Gave the other to a friend. We’re hopeful.

But I’m mainly here to tell you that the social-media work I’m doing is eating my leg off, and it all comes to a climax this coming weekend, which is my way of saying this may be the last you hear from me until after Labor Day. The next few days will be action-packed. But I’ll have my laptop, and I’ll try.

Today I mainly want to draw your attention to Neil Steinberg’s excellent blog on Robert Kennedy Jr., on the occasion of the utter rejection of all he claims to hold dear, and his willing embrace of Trump flunkydom.

None of it is news at this point, but this was a sharp observation, I thought:

RFK Jr.’s story is not at its end, unfortunately, but now continues, to a fresh hell, the humiliation of being a Trump acolyte. Take a glance at a piece I wrote in 2016, “Chris Christie in rags” about the “stunned, miserable stare” on Christie’s face when he found himself standing in Trump’s rogue’s gallery of supporters, just another supernumerary to the Great Cheetoh God, hoping to huff a contact high of ego and power. The former governor of New Jersey later tried to reinvent himself as a person with a functional conscience, and speak out against Trump. Too little, too late. Or as I sometimes will write a reader: a person who thinks that Donald Trump is a good idea for this country can’t really expect anyone to care what he thinks about anything else. It’s the same reason you don’t ask homeless people for stock tips. I wonder as RFK slides deeper into the Trumpian netherworld whether it will ever occur to him that he had done this to himself.

It’s sorta breathtaking, in a way: An environmental lawyer has now allied with a man for whom the environment is a golf course. A vaccine opponent who’s now in the pocket of the man who, in his one decent act as president (although a no-brainer), fast-tracked the Covid jab. And I keep thinking about RFK’s voice, his spasmodic dysphonia, which he is said to believe was the result of a flu shot, and refuses to treat. I hadn’t heard him speak in a while, and on Friday, I was struck by how difficult he is to understand. The condition is treatable, with Botox shots to the larynx, but he refuses to get them. And now he’s hoping for a high-level position in the second Trump administration — Trump, a man who picks his inner circle on the basis of how they look, and was said to be repulsed by Nikki Haley’s slight skin discoloration. You just know he’s imitating his new supporter the minute Sad Bobby leaves earshot.

But you know what? It couldn’t happen to a nicer guy. So the hell with him.

Now it’s back to the video-editing mangle with me, and I wish you a pleasant unofficial last week of summer. We’ll see if my yard sign gets stolen.

God bless you, girl:

LIVE from the DNC – @JackPosobiec: "How many abortions have you had?"

DNC Attendee: "I'm being paid by George Soros to have an abortion on stage." pic.twitter.com/AyQvgivtSI

— Human Events Daily (@humaneventslive) August 19, 2024

That’s the way to deal with these weird freaks.

I didn’t watch any of the RNC, so it’s hard to compare however they did their roll call of the states with the raucous, DJ-spinning roll call I’m watching now at the DNC. They just hit Idaho, and the DJ cued up “Private Idaho,” which is probably the only danceable song ever written about that place. What will it be for Michigan? Either Motown or Eminem, but I’m figuring it’s gotta be Motown. Whatever it is, this is pretty cool, although I loved the virtual roll call in 2020 and the calamari ninja from Rhode Island.

They should play this song for Rhode Island. Wouldn’t mix with the high-energy groove, but it’s definitely one of those only-song-written-about-it kind of places.

And now Michigan! And it’s Eminem after all.

Kamala is in Milwaukee tonight, running a similarly high-energy rally. Meanwhile, the orange menace was in Howell, Michigan this afternoon, where he took over a police station for a “press conference” of 150 journalists and 70 or so supporters. It was…not high-energy:

it's the second straight day where a sedated-sounding Trump has been ranting incoherently at an event (this time in Howell, Michigan) while people are forced to stand behind him for way too long. Note the complete lack of reaction to everything he says & the fact that he appears… pic.twitter.com/9iY7biRO7Z

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) August 20, 2024

We might pull this thing out after all. But keep the pedal to the floor all the way.

Not much more today, except to direct you to this very excellent essay by A.R. Moxon, taking apart J.D. Vance’s agreement with a podcaster that went like this:

In recent days we were reminded that back in 2020 the bestselling author, pretend hillbilly, future prospective vice president candidate, and full-time awkwardness enthusiast Jorts Decider “JD” Vance went on Eric Weinstein’s podcast, and nodded along with an out-of-pocket statement that the host made.

The statement was that raising grandchildren was “the whole purpose of the post-menopausal female.”

It’s a great piece, but here’s where it rang all the bells for me:

It might be a bit hard for Vance to dodge the rap, though, since he’s spent so much of his time in recent years agreeing with creeps who say creepy shit about women, and being a creep who says creepy shit about women in order to impress creeps who say creepy shit about women, and generally just acting like the kind of creepy little suck-up who calls women “females”–which is to say one of a whole passel of moist pallid online dudes who freebased Jordan Peterson throughout the 2010s and antisocialized themselves into treating relationships with women as a sort of transactional warfare between sexes, in which men are bold adventurers looking for sex and family, which are natural human connections they seem to view as video game achievements to be bestowed upon them if they enter the proper cheat code, in which women are hidden clay jars containing sex and family, to be discovered and then once found added to the inventories of adventuring men as acquisitions. A number of these creepy perverts got rich on tech or crypto or whatever, and they think their wealth makes them geniuses instead of just wealthy, and the ones who didn’t get rich through tech or crypto or whatever seem to think the wealth of the others conveys genius upon themselves, so now they go around talking about themselves as Alpha Chad masters of the universe, and speak of other human beings like they’re fodder for their whims, and generally sound do their very best to sound like eugenicist mad scientists in Victorian novels.

Egg-zackly. These people aren’t just weird, they’re dangerously weird.

And they’re only to Pennsylvania! But it’s very entertaining. So I’ll leave you here.

The news has been moving at such a blistering pace of late. I know this story has already been passed around, but honestly, it was so interesting I have reread it a few times, and you should, too.

It’s about how Tim Walz, as a high-school teacher in Alliance, Nebraska, a little town in the western part of the state, decided to teach his geography class about genocide. This was in 1993, although the story linked above is from 2008, when Walz had recently been elected to Congress. And so:

Mr. Walz had already taught for a year in China, and he brought the world into his classroom in the form of African thumb pianos and Tibetan singing bowls. For the global geography class, he devised something far more ambitious than what the curriculum easily could have been — the identification and memorization of capitals, mountain ranges and major rivers. It was more ambitious, too, than a unit solely on the Holocaust of the sort many states have required.

“The Holocaust is taught too often purely as a historical event, an anomaly, a moment in time,” Mr. Walz said in a recent interview, recalling his approach. “Students understood what had happened and that it was terrible and that the people who did this were monsters.

“The problem is,” he continued, “that relieves us of responsibility. Obviously, the mastermind was sociopathic, but on the scale for it to happen, there had to be a lot of people in the country who chose to go down that path. You have to make the intellectual leap to figure out the reasons why.”

How did he do this?

For nine weeks through the winter and early spring that school year, through the howling blizzards and the planting of the first alfalfa on the plains, the class pored over data about economics, natural resources and ethnic composition. They read about civil war, colonialism and totalitarian ideology. They worked with reference books and scholarly reports, long before conducting research took place instantly online.

I’m already loving his approach as a teacher. I wonder how many kids were in the school. How lucky they were to have a teacher like this. At the end of the unit, he asked them to give their best guess where the next genocide would happen, offering them about a dozen choices. And what did they come up with?

Their answer was: Rwanda. The evidence was the ethnic divide between Hutus and Tutsis, the favoritism toward Tutsis shown by the Belgian colonial regime, and the previous outbreaks of tribal violence. Mr. Walz awarded high marks.

Well. We all know what happened the very next year.

This guy isn’t perfect, because no one is. But I’d vote for a teacher who came up with a lesson like this over a guy who peddled a memoir selling out his community.

Well, how was your weekend? Mine was busy, at least until I tried to bring a heavy box in from the front porch, struggled to get the screen door open, and fell on my ass right off the whole thing. I’m fine, but I took a bang on the ribcage and my hip. The good news is, I didn’t break anything, but I do have a garish bruise the size of my hand there. And it still hurts to move. It’ll be better in a few days, but it sucks to glimpse your mortality, doesn’t it?

Another killer week ahead, with one after that, and then Labor Day weekend, and after that — relief.

This might be the last day for this for a while:

Fortunately it was a great day for it.

I guess it was back at Barrington Elementary School, and it must have been early in the year, because we were talking about the just-concluded Olympic Games — this had to have been 1968, I guess — and one of my classmates asked, “Who won the Olympics?” The teacher explained that no one country “wins” the Olympics, that athletes compete under their own flags and win individual events, but the whole spectacle was about international fellowship and friendship.

Yeah, tell that to Dick Ebersol, amirite? As I recall, he was the one who instituted medal counts, first on NBC, which jingoistic editors later adopted for newspapers, and so on and so on.

Since we have to live with medal counts, here’s an unpopular opinion: I like it when American athletes, especially those who are favorites, are upset in their events. My all-time favorite might be when the American men’s basketball team had to settle for bronze in the 2004 games. And I realize it’s not the athletes losing that gives me this grim joy, but the insane, over-emphasis on American athletes, especially in the handful of prime-time sports that NBC shamelessly milks for pathos — gymnastics, swimming, track and a few others. Because I’ve spent my career in media, I can’t watch a closeup of Simone Biles sitting on the sideline without reverse-angling through the fourth wall. I know she’s surrounded by photographers and lenses capturing her every nose-scratch, and while I don’t want her to crash and burn — excuse me, for her Olympic dreams to vanish, I do want NBC to think, just for a few minutes, whether maybe another sport might be worthy of a little bit of attention.

Alan told me about kayak cross, a new sport this cycle, described by a writer for New York magazine as “a kind of mix between a ski slalom and white-water rafting and something you would see on one of the silly game shows that air on ABC in the summer where people risk bodily injury for small cash prizes. It is easily the most ‘should be narrated by a B-list comedian’ event at the Olympics. People in the crowd at Vaires-sur-Marne Nautical Stadium should have airhorns. These are the highest compliments I know how to give.” That is an excellent description; the videos are hilarious. Can we get a little comic relief between closeups of Simone Biles looking fierce and determined? Just a little?

I mean, I look at the clips that turn up in social-media feeds, and it’s often the weirdo sports like artistic swimming. There’s definitely an audience for this. You know what the most shared track-and-field clip was in recent days? The French pole vaulter who brought down the bar with his sizable penis, but did we see that on NBC? No. (OK, maybe we did. I didn’t watch every second in recent days. But I doubt it.)

Fortunately, other media outlets are still practicing journalism:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by The Washington Post (@washingtonpost)

You should watch that. It’s good.

Now I’m watching diving. One of the things I like about the Olympics is the way different sports reward different body types, and no group excels at flinging their bodies through the air like compact Asian people. These Chinese women are amazing; they barely make splashes.

In other news at this hour, Tim Walz! That was a good introductory speech. Still not taking anything for granted, because man, these Republicans get scarier every day.

Like many of you, I’ve been watching the Olympics this week. Only the primetime stuff, and I’m not squeamish about spoilers. I know, for instance SPOILER ALERT that Simone Biles killed it today, and the women’s gymnastics team won the gold. I mean, if I wanted to be surprised I wouldn’t be on the internet all day. I’ll watch anyway.

In the course of it, I may see this commercial, called “Dear Sydney.” In it, a father asks Google’s AI function to help his daughter write a fan letter to a track star. “She wants to show Sydney some love, and I’m pretty good with words, but this has to be just right,” he says.

I hate this fucking thing. As the New York story points out:

What? Why would a dad who is “pretty good with words” need an AI model to help his daughter write a heartfelt message to her favorite athlete? Aren’t these moments what parenthood is all about? What sort of lesson is this? Not only does it imply to your kid that it’s okay to offload writing assignments to AI, it also suggests it’s a good idea to let the computer express feelings for you, which may be a troubling precedent.

Troubling? When your kid gets caught using AI to write a term paper in high school, don’t cry about unequal treatment, dad. You started her down this path. Weird, too, that I had almost this exact thought, too:

Brand strategist Michael Miraflor wrote that the ad was quite similar to the Apple iPad commercial from May that was widely reviled. “They both give the same feeling that something is very off, a sort of tone-deafness to the valid concerns and fears of the majority,” he wrote, adding that both were developed in-house.

Yeah. What tf is going on in Silicon Valley? I want AI to do the boring shit so I can concentrate on stuff I want to do, not the other way around. Sydney should return Google’s money and tell that little pixie to leave time in her life for English class.

In other news at this hour, Kamala Harris has texted me 9,000 times to inform me she’s running for president. (You’re kidding, I hadn’t heard.) Then she asks for money. I sent her some. But I have yet to see a significant attack ad on Trump, and I’m ready for it. You have money, Democrats! You’re raising millions and millions! The “weird” thing is fine, but it’ll be played in about 5 minutes, and I expect to see a LOT of advertising talking about what a threat Trump is. Yes, a threat to democracy, and I don’t care if these weird right-wing pundits blame that line for the shooting in Pennsylvania. It doesn’t make it any less true, so lean in! Get going!

And that is all for a muggy Tuesday.

Remember back in June, we were talking here about “medbeds,” which, in the words of the NYT story I had posted, one subject of which…

…came to believe, along with millions of others, that Covid was a creation of the federal government used to manipulate the public and steal elections; that two doses of the vaccine would make men infertile; that Trump had been anointed to lead a “government cleansing”; that fighting had already begun in underground military tunnels; that Trump’s election in 2024 was preordained by God; that he would return to power with loads of gold collected from other countries that had capitulated to his power; that, during his next term, Americans would have free electricity, zero income tax and “medbeds” powered by a secret technology that could harness natural energy to heal diseases and extend human life; and that the only thing standing in the way of this future was a deep state so malicious and vast that its roots extended all the way into tiny Esmeralda County.

Well, the same reporter, Eli Saslow, who already has one Pulitzer and will no doubt gather a few more in the coming years, actually found someone seeking medbed therapy, such as it is. And the story — gift link here — is astonishing.

The subject is a 60-ish former paratrooper and current rancher, whose body is a banged-up, painful mess, and thanks to the “Patriot Party News,” whose various feeds are his near-constant companion, is after this miracle cure his online friends are talking about. He seems like he at least leans in the direction of skepticism, but piping this garbage into his brain nearly every waking moment of his life has taken a toll:

Michael walked outside to check on the horses while he listened to people on the audio feed talk about how Trump was anointed president by God, and how George Soros was building mansions in Hollywood to house undocumented immigrants. He turned up the volume and spoke back to the group over the wind as the unrealities in his ears continued to become the reality of his life.

“Thanks for helping me get up and going this morning,” he said. “I never thought I would be on a platform with people I’d never met and hear this many I love yous.”

“I’m so glad we’re in this war together,” said an aircraft mechanic who went by the name Oath Keeper Bill. “We need you healthy and strong. Have you been following the latest news on medbeds?”

“Oh yeah. They’re here, and they can heal anything,” someone else responded. “Cancer. Dementia. Broken bones. Arthritis. Forty-five minutes in one of those beds, and you’ll never be in pain again.”

“Come on,” Michael said. “Really?”

Yes, Michael, really! Of course, “the military” has a big share of them, and the ones in private hands are being hogged by “liberal billionaires” and why no one thought to pop Joe Biden in one is not a question that’s answered here. I don’t want to spoil the story for you, but eventually Michael gets his medbed appointment — and this section of the story is amazing. Just a glimpse:

He picked up the menu of options and looked at the alphabetized first page, which had more than 50 choices beginning with the letter A: “Acid Reflux,” “Acne,” “Alzheimer’s,” “Alcoholism,” “Aneurysm,” “Anthrax,” “Anxiety Relief,” “Arthritis,” “Asperger’s,” “Autism.”

“Wow, it can really correct all this?” Michael asked.

“Over time, it’s possible,” Andrea said. “As long as you believe, and your mind and body are in alignment with the right frequencies.”

It’s just a new version of faith healing, yes, but…wow. I said back in June I’m no longer interested in making nice with these people, that they deserve whatever is coming for them, but it’s hard to stay hard-hearted about legit chumps.

No, maybe it isn’t.

What else did I do this weekend? Well, it was hot. And I worked. But the coming week won’t be as busy as last week. But it will be as hot. Hotter. Stay cool out there.