No 125-pound pumpkin today. I didn’t get out to take its picture until the light had faded, something it’s been doing alarmingly early these days. Instead, another entry in Nance’s Annals of Parenting Angst.
Although this is a subject that interests me and me alone, I do spend a certain amount of time wondering just how to guide my child’s developing taste in, er, the arts. Last week, for instance, I proposed a Family Movie Night at home, with the idea of renting one kid movie and one grown-up movie, the first for the three of us and the second for after bedtime. (Don’t get any filthy ideas; I’m talking something rated PG-13 or above, and it turned out to be “Mean Girls.”) I asked Kate to choose something for the first, and she came up with “Bratz — Starrin’ and Stylin’,” a 61-minute cartoon about her favorite dolls (which I privately refer to as the Skankz).
I vetoed the Bratz. Chose “Holes” instead. Alan and I loved it; Kate said it was “good.” And that’s all she said.
This week, I offered her the same option, only this time I swore I’d let her pick anything at all. Again, she chose the Skankz. Oh my God.
Crappy animation? Check. Strange, adult-free universe? Check (although there was one teacher, whose purpose in life was to ruin the Skankz’ day by making them do schoolwork with the prom right around the corner). Nearly non-existent story line? Check. Offensive values conveyed? Oh, check check check check check. The Skankz’ existential dilemma seems to be whether one of them has “lost her fashion sense.” It ends when they decide they can all be friends and put on a super prom, and that Jade still has her fashion sense.
I asked Kate what she thought. “Good,” she replied, swiftly adding, “I really, really liked it.”
Someday we’ll watch “The Godfather” together. I just don’t know when.
I can’t say the 61 minutes was a total waste, as it seems she has picked up a valuable tool of plot discernment: She already recognizes Borden’s Rule.
Borden’s Rule, named for my old friend and neighbor Jeff Borden, was first discerned when he — Borden — worked as our newspaper’s TV critic. It is: Any car in a movie five years old or older, especially if it’s a four-door American sedan, is toast. So when the Bratz pull up in a crummy car, and later drive it into a tree, Kate said, “I knew that would happen, because the car was all beat up.”
Anyway, here’s a review of “Bratz — Starrin’ and Stylin'” from Amazon:
It all starts of when there at school,until the teacher says they have to do an assigemt,on self expresion,the bratz do a video on it,until somebody write secrets that are really secrets(secrets that are abou the bratz)each doll gets her secrets told,her deep secrets,jade’s secret is that she’s losing her fashion sense,then they see it in the daily doings section!Who could of done it,it has to be one of the dolls,YASMIN!Yasmin was writting down there secrets,the bratz get mad with her!Will they ever be friends again???Buy the movie to find out!
Sigh. Think I’ll buy the “GoodFellas” DVD and put it away for a later date.