Remember what I said last week about stories you don’t need to read past the headline? For this one, I stopped reading after the first paragraph. I didn’t want anything to ruin the picture in my head:
SEATTLE, Wash. – A mountain goat that fatally gored a hiker, then stood over the man and stared at people trying to help, had shown aggressive behavior in the past, Olympic National Park officials said Monday.
You know? I just don’t want to know any more.
Hello, Tuesday. The goat story isn’t even the highlight of the news roundup, which I’m hoping bodes well for the rest of the week. Although you never know. I need to get to the gymnasium at some point today; my architecture of my knees feels like a collection of loose scrap, and if I don’t tighten up everything around them, I’m one slip on the ice away from a torn ACL, or worse. Still might be. I wish I knew what I ever did to my knees to offend them so; it’s not like I played football or acted in porn movies* or anything. Even my high-heel days were fairly short, as these things go. I have always been clumsy, however — I was still getting skinned knees as recently as, oh, a month ago.
* A former editor of mine once interviewed John Holmes. He said he couldn’t stay in porno forever: “It’s like pro football — the knees are the first things to go.”
If I sound a bit scattered, I am. Big news this week on the hyperlocal front — besides the missing banker whose body was found yesterday, it’s high election season. Oddly enough, I have yet to see a single TV ad for our governor’s race, much less anything else. I know this constitutes a blessing, but it is sort of strange. It must be because the big races around here are mostly pretty lopsided, and the local ones are still competitive but unlikely to spend on campaign commercials. Tonight I’m going to a candidate forum, for the school-board seat up for grabs. Should be a packed house; people care about schools around here, and at least one of the candidates has been so understated I still know practically nothing about her, so it’s one of those civic-duty things. I don’t expect scrapping — this being Preppyville — but I’m hoping for some spirited disagreement falling short of your average Detroit school-board meeting, where they frequently yell and sometimes throw things.
So let’s skip to the bloggage, eh? There’s so much good stuff here, all in cryptic, short teasers to encourage curious clickers:
Lawyers! Watch this. Everybody else, too.
When you ask Coozledad to give his bull a skritch on your behalf, he delivers.
If this guy were running for anything around here, I’d totally vote for him. Meet Jimmy McMillan of the Rent is Too Damn High party.
People think they have this town figured out. No one has this town figured out.
Just what America needs: A new way to lose your house to Wall Street.
Ready to take up my pickax and get to work.