Answer: Who cares?

I know some of you who visit don’t check back for the comments, so here’s something you missed yesterday:

That’s Beartooth Pass, Montana Wyoming, four days ago. I’ve gone through snow in the mountains in June before, but not that much of it. I’m sure it’s lovely, and I’m sure the views are grand, but photos like this remind me how much I’m a flatlander. Once the ground gets high enough that you can fall from it and die, I have to fight the urge to lay face-down and hang on for dear life. Although then you miss all the pretty scenery.

I think that picture was MarkH’s. I hope it was. If not, I’m breaking someone’s copyright.

So. I made time for “Game of Thrones” and “The Killing” finales, finally, and I really don’t have much to add to the chorus. By way of comparison, I think these few paragraphs from Gawker sum it up pretty well. Essentially, one show played by the rules and one didn’t, and if you read any further, know here be spoilers, but let’s get to it:

I’m always interested in shows like “The Killing,” which arise out of a different TV culture. The original was Danish, called “Forbrydelsen,” and if I cared to, I could probably dig up the statistics, but let me retrieve them from memory instead: It was so popular the entire country ground to a halt for an hour every week, for an estimated economic impact of nine trillion kroner. For the finale, you could have walked naked down the main street in Copenhagen, and no one would have noticed. Even the mermaid statue was watching. And so on. All of which should bode well for the American remake, and for a while, it did. The series started out great, and for a few weeks, I totally got it. I loved it, in fact. It was “Prime Suspect,” another crime-story import, with more rain. Lots more rain, in fact. We’ve discussed the rain before, haven’t we? Too much rain.

Here’s something I — we — should have considered, however: There’s nothing on TV in Denmark. Oh, sure, Danes have satellite and cable and all the rest of it, but I bet most of their programming is imported. You just don’t think of Denmark when you think of groundbreaking entertainment, and while it’s western Europe and presumably their culture would be recognizable to us, it’s also one of those places where I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that “Dallas” is still popular. Or “Baywatch.” Or that their “(Insert name of country)’s Got Talent” franchise just crowned an operatic soprano, or a viola player, or a contortionist. Like us, but not. Skewed.

I’ve never been to Denmark, so I can’t say with any authority what their national character is like, but reaching into my big bag of national-character stereotypes, I come up with Gloom, and Individual Industry, and Self-Effacement. Probably they’re so pathetically grateful to get their very own competently produced murder-mystery series, produced in their native language, that they didn’t care that it strung them along for the entire series and then didn’t reveal the killer in the final episode. They don’t mind tuning in next season. It’s a national duty.

Because that’s what happened, if you didn’t hear. After however-many episodes of teasing and misleading and enough red herrings to make lunch for all of Scandinavia, the series ended with…more uncertainty! Another switcheroo! It might have been Billy Campbell, but it probably wasn’t!

You’ll have to wait another year to find out who the real killer was, in other words. Well, you will. And maybe you. But I’m so far out of this show, I might as well have moved to Denmark.

Here’s something Veena Sud (Danish for “fucks with your head”), the creator of the original series and executive producer of the American remake, didn’t consider: We eat murder for breakfast here. Every day in the United States of America, people die on TV, a whole army of them. We peek through their windows and watch them enjoying life, not knowing there’s a killer outside waiting to end it all. We watch them bound and tortured, begging for their lives. Once they’re dead, we tunnel into their wounds to watch their spleens explode. If we’re going to invest a whole series in just one murder, it better pay off. Because we don’t have time for this shit, otherwise.

Fun fact to know and tell: Copenhagen’s murder rate is roughly four per 100,000 population. It’s a city of 2 million, give or take, which means 80 homicides a year. Eighty! There were 361 murders in Detroit, year before last, a city of 800,000. As American as apple pie.

Which is not to say we’re callous about it (although we are). Just that you promised something you didn’t deliver. The show’s tag line, after all, was: Who killed Rosie Larsen? And you didn’t answer the question.

So the hell with Rosie. Bad things happen to prostitutes. Which “CSI” teaches us, three times a week.

“Game of Thrones,” now, that was a series with a payoff. OMG DRAGONS, and not just any dragons, but wee baby dragons! This show changed my mind about fantasy fiction, the whole damn genre. I’ve never been able to get into it, for a number of reasons, but the main one is magic. What’s the point of following a story if the writer’s hole card is magic? Write yourself into a corner? Have your character cast a spell and enchant his way out of it. I’m also not fond of dwarves, or swords, or krakens, or British accents as the all-purpose go-to tongue of the realm. But “Game of Thrones” gave me all of that, and wisely kept the magic at bay until the final moments, and then: Whoa.

(I will say, they kind of wimped out. In the book, Daenerys emerges from the ashes of her husband’s funeral pyre with the baby dragons actually nursing at her breasts. I suspect it would have been too hard/expensive to render with CGI, though.)

The “Game of Thrones” finale settled all the extant story lines and set up the second season with several strong new ones. I’m totally hooked. Now I need to decide whether I want to read the books, or let the show reveal the story to me. My sister’s on the final one, and I asked her, “So, has winter arrived yet?” And no, it hasn’t. The dragons aren’t even full-grown yet. I don’t know if I have the patience for all those pages of exposition. We’ll see.

The hour is drawing late, so let’s go blogging:

I’ve been reading about David Mamet’s conversion to the right wing, but I obviously haven’t read enough details, or at least not the ones revealed in Christopher Hitchens’ review of his new book. The man hasn’t had a political conversion, he’s gone mad:

Part of the left’s savage animus against Sarah Palin is attributable to her status not as a woman, neither as a Conservative, but as a Worker.

What? Life’s too short to waste on this one. I’d rather watch “The Killing” spin out the Larsen case for another 25 episodes or so.

OID: Boy, 7, steals stepfather’s car to go see his bio-dad, leads police on chase.

And as we’re running long today, I think that’s it. We just had a thunderstorm, followed by sunshine. Which means, boys and girls? Yes, humidity! Nothing like having a bad hair day to look forward to.

Posted at 10:22 am in Detroit life, Television |

52 responses to “Answer: Who cares?”

  1. velvet goldmine said on June 21, 2011 at 10:55 am

    I’m late to the fantasy fic party too, for many of the same reasons. It turns out that what the party goers knew all along is that current fantasy can be very angsty, in a good way. In Pratchett’s Discworld, magic leaves trails of residue like nuclear waste that have to be buried or the land suffers ill effects. Neil Gaiman’s characters are so freighted with curses and circumstances hat any powers they have are usually either immediately countered by someone with a cooler trick or land them into even worse danger. But now I sound like a book jacket. I will have to check out Game of Thrones.

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  2. coozledad said on June 21, 2011 at 11:02 am

    Part of the left’s savage animus against Sarah Palin is attributable to her status not as a woman, neither as a Conservative, but as a Worker.
    Talk about a kickass parlor game.
    Part of the left’s savage animus against Rick Perry is attributable to his status not as a secessionist, neither as a gay-bashing closet man climber, but as a factory second leather office chair.

    Part of the left’s mincing captiousness against John Huntsman is attributable to his status not as a G.E.D. wielding Rod Stewart impersonator, neither as a hyperpedicured geriatric salon poodle, aber ein Men’s Wearhouse spokesmodel.

    Whose ass did he pull that sentence structure from? If it’s his own, he needs a colonoscopy.

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  3. moe99 said on June 21, 2011 at 11:06 am

    One more quibble with the end of GoT–Dany’s hair was burnt off “to a crisp” by the fire, but I’m sure that would have played havoc with the aesthetics of the final scene. Overall, it was immensely satisfying and I’ve read the books. I really love this guy’s immediate reaction to the penultimate episode:

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  4. del said on June 21, 2011 at 11:13 am

    When I was 22 I stayed at a Copenhagen youth hostel for a few days. Loved Denmark. Of course it didn’t hurt that the first young lovely I met at a the tavern had accused me of contriving my American citizenship as a pick up line.

    I did what any kid would do touring Denmark, I saw the mermaid and toured the Carlsberg and Tuborg breweries.

    Once after midnight my friend and I were alone near a train station and first heard then saw an intoxicated teenager staggering nearby. He slammed his hand against a metal sign while walking. We kept out of sight and heard a heavy metal thud as something hit the sidewalk. I think it was a gun, but I stayed out of sight as he tucked it in his pocket. After he had safely passed I saw that there were fresh drops of blood on the sidewalk.

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  5. del said on June 21, 2011 at 11:23 am

    At some point you hear Christopher Hitchens say something wildly contrarian. Brilliant, you think. Then, you keep listening and realize that he’s bent on being outrageous to advance his own brand. Somewhere, someone loves his Palin comment.

    It ensures that attention will be paid — unless he overplays his hand as the house wild-card.

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  6. Mark P. said on June 21, 2011 at 11:25 am

    I sort of drifted away from The Killing as the season progressed (if that’s the right word) until I wondered what I ever saw in it in the first place. I’m not sure I agree completely with your analysis of why it was so bad here. I think it was simply bad writing. Good at first is great; it pulls you in. But the hardest part of most stories is the ending. And when the viewer simply doesn’t give enough of a crap about the ending to slog through the middle, that’s what I call bad writing. And then there’s no ending? I want my money back.

    GOT, on the other hand, I kind of got into when I was able to see episodes while staying in a hotel. We don’t get HBO at home. So I missed a lot, including the ending. Oh well. Maybe I’ll get it on Blu-Ray one of these days.

    Del, I gave up on Hitchens a while back. Once you decide someone is full of crap (lot of that going around in this comment) on one subject, it’s not intellectually honest to accept him as an authority on other subjects, even if you happen to agree with his position on those other subjects. And that’s what happened with me; he is or would like to be a profligate spender of other people’s blood. I no longer read him.

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  7. Julie Robinson said on June 21, 2011 at 11:38 am

    A comment on The Killing noted that the Danish version of the show was much better than the American one. It’s not available here yet, but it might be worth waiting for.

    Our daughter spent a week in Copenhagen last fall, and at the time, her friend was still on paid maternity leave although her baby was more than a year old. Leave from where? From her music therapy studies. When she goes back to school she will have free child care. No wonder so many Danes are placid. Yes, they pay high taxes. Yes, they think it’s worth it.

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  8. alex said on June 21, 2011 at 11:45 am

    The sentence about the left’s savage animus toward Palin was Mamet’s, not Hitchens’.

    The quality of the writing and the apparent absence of editing in Mamet’s book suggests what we know already, that Mamet thinks his shit just doesn’t stink.

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  9. coozledad said on June 21, 2011 at 11:57 am

    I never saw any of the films or plays Mamet wrote, but slogged partway through some excerpts of his stuff in Granta.I never got him. Never got Richard Ford, either. Maybe it was the humorlessness or the underlying assumption that I would give a fuck what he would say regardless of the absence of restraint or empathy.
    Plus, Alan Arkin can read a dog food label and make it work most days.

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  10. LAMary said on June 21, 2011 at 12:13 pm

    Cooz, same here with Mamet and Richard Ford. I’ve tried to like them but it never worked for me.
    Cormac McCarthy on the other hand is my kind of guy.

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  11. crinoidgirl said on June 21, 2011 at 12:15 pm

    Amy Poehler at Harvard College Day:

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  12. MarkH said on June 21, 2011 at 12:28 pm

    The photo is not mine, Nancy, it was taken by by some WYDOT workers, one of whom is in the photo. It appeared on their website and fbook page and has been making the rounds of the local papers and blogs. I don’t think there’s a copyright issue(?). Technically this was on Wyoming side, so not Montana and not all the way at the top.

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  13. MichaelW said on June 21, 2011 at 12:41 pm

    Veena Sud had nothing to do with Forbrydelsen. She adapted it for American TV, and by “adapted it,” I mean “gutted it and wore it around as a hat.” That was some of the worst pacing and writing I’ve ever seen. Sud’s previous gig was Cold Case.

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  14. Scout said on June 21, 2011 at 12:43 pm

    Since $P is a topic, how about that “memoir” by her mini-me spawn? What with accusing the father of her child of date rape and cattily trashing Cindy and Meghan McCain, well, huh, the nut doesn’t fall far from the tree, does it? Stay classy, Palin family!

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  15. nancy said on June 21, 2011 at 12:53 pm

    Thanks for the correction, MW. And you, MH.

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  16. ROGirl said on June 21, 2011 at 1:07 pm

    If Bristol Palin were the daughter of some white trash fundamentalist redneck from East Butthole and happened to get pregnant the first time she had sex while drunk on wine coolers in a tent with a guy she barely knew…

    Oh wait, you mean her story deserves a memoir?

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  17. MaryRC said on June 21, 2011 at 1:26 pm

    Scout, apparently the other contestants on Dancing With the Stars were “cold” to her too. Judging from the excerpts from this whinefest that have been quoted so far, everyone she met was a big meanyhead.

    It sounds like she took her mother’s grudge-settling book about the McCain campaign and just changed Katie Couric and McCain strategist Steve Schmidt to Megan McCain and Jennifer Grey.

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  18. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 1:26 pm

    Game of Thrones, the Killing? Sorry but Terriers and Hank were decidedly better. And Fox fucked it over. Like they screwed the Dodgers.

    The NFL? Owners want players that risk their lives to agree to a %age, but they refuse to open their books. Assholes. This is classic union shit, but in the case of pro sports, the players are the game. The owners are wannabes. The Pats insisted Robert Edwards play in the moronic beach flag football event. Pats fucked Robert Edwards over. He nearly lost his leg. Owners suck, players do not. Players could put on games. Owners couldn’t.
    a woman tragically injured and no longer good enough for this asshole.
    The McCain girls. Who was their mom, not the current Mrs. McCain. Another sordid Republican story. These assholes talk a good family values game. Palins, are we joking? I think they were wearing jorts and sporting mullets and setting wildfires in FLA recently. These are Hillbillys. These people are morons.

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  19. MaryRC said on June 21, 2011 at 1:28 pm

    Roger Ebert is being criticised for his tweet about “Jackass” star Ryan Dunn who crashed his car, killing himself and his passenger:,0,4314381.story

    Count me in on Ebert’s side.

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  20. nancy said on June 21, 2011 at 1:33 pm

    I just saw that. I am so totally on Team Ebert I can’t even see the other side of the field from here.

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  21. MaryRC said on June 21, 2011 at 1:40 pm

    prospero, Cindy McCain is Megan McCain’s mother. McCain had a daughter, Sidney, by his first marriage (as well as two step-sons whom he adopted). Sidney is in her early 40s and lives in Toronto. According to the article she prefers to live a private life, which she seems to do successfully. She mentions that she loves her father … but doesn’t say anything about Cindy.

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  22. Bitter Scribe said on June 21, 2011 at 1:41 pm

    Here’s a truly tragic and heartbreaking twist on the youngster-steals-the-family-car-but-for-a-good-reason story.

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  23. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 1:42 pm

    Why would Jennifer Gray ever alter her face? And Dancing? Look you had Hines. The most excellent football player and actually excellent guy ever. I would never spend a moment on this show. But seriously, Who are these people? Kirstie Alley outweighs Hines Ward. It is frigging stupid. On the other hand, Isner vs. Mahut? Whose idea of something funny is this shit? I’m a fellow alum of Isner’s so I’m a fan. Plus, the guy is very good. You all have dealt with this Terelle Pryor shit previously. Lying pieces of sweater vest shit. And AJ Green sat out four games because he sold some asshole his own shirt. And these shitheels played in a bowl game? Screw Big Farm.

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  24. Jeff Borden said on June 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm

    I’m already looking forward to the second autobiography of the revirginized Bristol Palin, which I’m told will cover her 21st through 23rd years. A memoir at age 20? WTF?

    The Palin clan is becoming America’s most disgusting family, worthy fodder for a send-up by John Waters with a couple of drag queens playing Bristol and SheWho. These people remind me of George Costanza at the appetizer table, cramming as many crab-filled mushroom caps as humanly possibly into his maw. They’re always grabbing, always conning, always whining and complaining. I rarely use the word hate to describe my feelings about someone, but damn, I’m right at the edge with these classless, low-life snowbillies.

    I’m sure we’ll have an amusing war of words between the bone-headed Bristol, who writes she lost her virginity after getting blackout drunk on wine coolers (nice parenting there, $P and Todd), and Meghan McCain, the equally stupid daughter of the man who catapulted this caricature of a family into national prominence. Neither of these two spoiled idiots can stand to be criticized by anyone.

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  25. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 2:22 pm

    Damn, people are weird.

    How is this different from the invasion of Ira1q? Assholes got rich and the American economy tanked while rich assholes got richer. I’d venture to say, I could have tanked that corporation and been a bigger ahole than Carly Fiorino for all that cash. So she tries politics and nobody thinks there’s anything wrong with that? She fucked up bigtime and got a golden parachute. She was a spectacular failure. Please. I could run any of these companies into the dumpster. Just pay me the money. It’s amazing how bidnesses run so perfectly, and they aren’t bureaucracies, you anti-government idiots. Every business is a bureaucracy, you numbnutz, and they cost you a fortune. For one thing, they keep huge numbers of lawyers on the payroll, to defend them when they screw people over. You dumbshit. Assholes should look up bureaucracy. Fucking morons.

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  26. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 2:29 pm

    Ms Palin is mournfully stupid, but if I say this, I’m an elitist. Dumb as grunt. These are the aholes setting wildfires in Florida and ruining my days with their jort-wearing, mullet-headed moron asses, setting the swamp on fire. What a buncha maroons. You cannot get dumber than a Florida redneck, unless you come from Maine, or maybe Alaska, where you rage against the governmet teat and suck on it bigtime. And keep me in your heart. This was a great poet. A brilliant guitar player. And an amazing piano man.

    I am just not clear on how stupid people in America are. They don’t understand that bidness is bureaucracy? and costs them spectacularly? Government is relatively efficient bureaucracy, you fucking morons. This is kinda beyond comprehension. Can people be this fucking stupid? Where does that cash go? Executive salaries for fucking the companies up big time. How does any of this make sense?

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  27. Judybusy said on June 21, 2011 at 2:50 pm

    Jeff Borden, please don’t insult drag queens by suggesting they play the Palins. Most DQs I’ve known have CLASS. 😉

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  28. Jeff Borden said on June 21, 2011 at 3:05 pm


    No offense intended. I was just musing about what someone like John Waters might do with the snowbillies if he ever turned his attention in their direction. I’d have loved to see Divine playing SheWho. . .

    And you are quite right about class. Wasilla is where class goes to die.

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  29. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 3:05 pm

    Roland the Thompson Gunner. So good it almost makes sense. In Ireland, in Lebanon, in Palestine and Berkeley. Very great artist. How are we supposed to say anything? If I say these folks are full of shit when they are clearly moronic, I’m automatically ruled out because they can’t be morons, even though they are. It is very difficult to be as stupid as these people are. Somebody that buys this palin shit is so fucking dumb it is almost impossible to believe. I mean, you have to be a whackjob to believe in that sort of hard-core stupidity.

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  30. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 3:18 pm

    Judybusy, that’s a zinger. But how does anybody comment on this revolting shitheel without being called an elitist. She is the most revolting piece of shit in history. What is wrong with people? This person is a remotely what you might call a human being. She is as revolting as a human being is capable of getting. A shithead. Jeannie Needs a Shooter.

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  31. mark said on June 21, 2011 at 3:41 pm

    I’m not on team Ebert. This line from his “apology” struck me: “It was not intended as cruel. It was intended as true.”

    Well, Roger, you’re bright enough to know that true and cruel aren’t mutually exclusive, like many comments that could be made about your physical appearance. The world didn’t need your little bit of bumper sticker wisdom; you went for a cheap laugh at the expense of those who may be grieving the loss of a friend or loved one.

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  32. nancy said on June 21, 2011 at 3:47 pm

    Wow, I didn’t take it as a funny comment at all. He was speculating, based on strongly circumstantial evidence, that the guy was driving drunk.

    If it were any old actor who’d died, I might feel differently. But these Jackass folks have gotten rich producing a TV show and movies showing them doing insanely stupid and outrageous physical stunts, designed to drop jaws and turn stomachs. So one dies in a car crash after photographs are taken of him drinking beers and shots at a bar, and the cops estimate he was traveling in excess of 100 miles per hour at the time of the wreck? Making a pointed observation about risk-taking seems like nothing more or less than what anyone would do. (I know I did.)

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  33. mark said on June 21, 2011 at 3:56 pm

    Not every observation needs to be voiced. Want my observations on A Weiner’s wife’s likely suffering? To what end, other than gratuitous cruelty?

    Some things aren’t any of my business. The internet allows us to share any thought with, potentially, millions of people. Doesn’t mean we should.

    And I don’t buy that some people (like Dunn) just deserve it.

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  34. Judybusy said on June 21, 2011 at 4:20 pm

    Jeff, B., the limits of typed communications sometimes mean teasing doesn’t come across as such! I knew you didn’t mean to offend. And alas, I believe Divine has died.

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  35. MaryRC said on June 21, 2011 at 4:21 pm

    We didn’t request your observation on Ebert’s physical appearance either, but you provided it. As for whether Dunn deserved it … what Nancy said. I don’t believe Ebert was trying to be funny.

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  36. Bitter Scribe said on June 21, 2011 at 4:38 pm

    If the Jackass guy had killed someone in another car–which could easily have happened–would we even be having this conversation?

    People are making Ebert out to be Fred Phelps or something. That’s ridiculous. When you proclaim yourself a Jackass, and die as a Jackass would, people have the right to call you one.

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  37. Mark P. said on June 21, 2011 at 4:52 pm

    And more to the point, if you do it in public and make money from it, you can count on being subject to public comment.

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  38. ROGirl said on June 21, 2011 at 5:31 pm

    The Jackass Guy DID kill someone else in his car.

    From his New York Times obit:

    “Perhaps his most notorious prank was the coda to “Jackass the Movie” (2002). Mr. Dunn inserted a toy car into his posterior, then hobbled to a doctor’s office for an X-ray. He convinced the doctor that the insertion had occurred after he had passed out at a fraternity party.

    “Even though it hurt like hell, I said that if I committed myself to this insanity I may as well see it through,” Mr. Dunn wrote on his Web site. T-shirts were later sold bearing the X-ray image.”

    The New York Times, for Christ’s sake.

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  39. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 5:52 pm

    What happens to jackasses is what they deserve. I will go splat riding my bike one of these days when some nitwit driving an Escalade turns right in front of me. I sure as shit will not wear a helmet. It happens frequently and I can just pray that the driver of the Caddy is prosecuted. Meantime, I can leave some bucks and my condo to people I care about. If you live your life as a jackass, you get what you deserve. I know, having done it. And I wouldn’t want anything to be different. I quit owning a drivers license 15 years ago, when I was arrested for DUI. It was the only responsible thing I could think to do. I was excruciatingly embarrassed. And I could only imagine what might have happened. I didn’t hurt anybody, and I was purely lucky not to. The damage people like the Jackass assholes and the Farrelly Bros. and this Zach Galifianakis asshole have done to movies, that’s another story altogether. How did movies go from Fast Times to American Pie? And didn’t we all lose something inherently human? Like Jackie Collins and books. What is wrong with people? Live like a jackass, die like a jackass. There is no doubt the dumbass was loaded. If I’m wrong, I’ll apologize. These people thought it would be a funny idea to have Johnny Knoxville do a movie about pretending to be a special needs Olympian. Laff riot, right? Maybe God just struck this shitheel down for being a sorry excuse for a human being. Seriously. Another asshole gone. Which I expect on my tombstone. Cast a cold eye.

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  40. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 6:06 pm

    It could be noted that Roger Ebert wrote the screenplay for the greatest Jackass movie ever made. Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. Funnier by 100 miles than any of that dumbass Jackass shit. I’ve got a wading pool full of mayonnaise. And you were a woman all along, and a goddamned ugly one. The Jackass aholes are mightily lame. Not a clever bone in their bodies, at least, left intact. And screw you you ahole. These shitheels thought it was funny to make fun of Special Olympics. Fuck you. These guys made Jim Carrey look clever. And that is nearly impossible.

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  41. Jolene said on June 21, 2011 at 6:12 pm

    I caught some of the Jackass/Ebert discussion on Twitter last night, including a link to this list of search results.

    Looks like pointing out the potential results of jackassery needs to be done more often, rather than less.

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  42. del said on June 21, 2011 at 6:17 pm

    Ebert rightfully apologized for his tweet’s timing (probably a bit too soon fo public comment). Still, I can imagine the Jackass movies must’ve infuriated him for their dissemination of bad ideas to undeveloped, impressionable minds. Their Do-Not-Try-This-At-Home warnings are, to a teenager, what the Tell-Your-Doctor-If-Your-Erection-Lasts-For-More-Than-4-Hours warnings are to grown men, an enticement.

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  43. alex said on June 21, 2011 at 6:29 pm

    Speaking of gratuitousness, Mark, seldom does a day go by when you aren’t spewing righteous indignation of the sort that should be reserved for people who kick kittens and rent out children as prostitutes.

    I’d tell you to lighten up, but then there’s nothing quite as laughable as the antics of an over-the-top scold. Oh, my heart just bleeds for those Jackass fans whose great day of bereavement has been ruined—simply ruined!—by that horrible Roger Ebert.

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  44. Dave said on June 21, 2011 at 6:40 pm

    Some guy I never heard of until yesterday is dead now by his own hand, more or less, by driving stupid. He may or may not have been intoxicated. I’ve gathered over the years that Roger Ebert knows a little about alcohol and his comments are made from a personal viewpoint based on experience, which may be the reason he felt the need to comment. Having driven while intoxicated on more than one occasion while in my twenties, without mishap and only being stopped once when the cop let me go when I promised to drive straight home (it WAS 1977), I would in no way recommend trying it, but it was a stupid, jackass thing to be doing. Did the man not want to be known as a jackass? Where’s the offense? It appears that it is ok to be insulting until it happens to them.

    I would love to comment on the girl who took the ailing dog and the family van with bad results but I fear those would be insensitive, too. I think I’m having a hard, insensitive day, sorry.

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  45. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 6:42 pm

    What is wrong with people? Roger Ebert is a villain for mocking some jackass that made money for having slugs shot into his balls by slingshot? What a buncha maroons, ignoranimi. The only way this guy would die is by DUI. What an asshole. This was also probably the end of life he wrote for himself. These morons demeaned movies. Worthless bunch of shit. As are the Farrellys. There is nothing funny about that shit. Assholes. Look at these ridiculous hipster Krauts. But what a babe and what a great song.

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  46. DellaDash said on June 21, 2011 at 7:03 pm

    Twitter-age ejaculations are nothing if not premature.

    Facebook removal and apology? Really? For tweeting garden variety conventional wisdom?

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  47. brian stouder said on June 21, 2011 at 8:03 pm

    DellaDash – I think your ‘twitter-age’ bon mot wins the thread in a walk! (I’m still chuckling); and Del’s point about “Don’t try this at home/erections that last four hours” hit the nail on the head (so to speak)

    As a non-sequitur, we just got back from a public hearing at South Side High School, conducted by the Indiana State Board of Education, with regard to South Side’s and North Side’s future. Friend-of-Nance and FWCS board president Mark the Shark GiaQuinta gave an absolutely tremendous public statement, as did Superintendent Dr Robinson, as well as union president Al Jacquay.

    Of course, Evert Moll, local know-nothing/gadfly had his inning, too – met by a cold silence from the crowd (and one boo); and I also wandered to the mike (and bombed right out). It was a positive event, and things seemed to Pam and I to go the way they should

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  48. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 9:24 pm

    Are erections that last four hours without blue pills dangerous? Ever been fourteen? Shit happens. And frequently, it’s embarrassing.

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  49. prospero said on June 21, 2011 at 9:30 pm

    Seriously, Cameron Diaz? What is it with jizz in your hair? What is wrong with people? That’s funny? Masturbating with a pie? People consistently live down to a level of stupidity that seems lower than that to which humans can sink to. And other maroons will find that funny. Dumber than grunt. Roger Ebert loves movies. The jackass assholes don’t. It’s pretty clear why he would think these guys should die hideously, hoist by own.

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  50. moe99 said on June 21, 2011 at 11:03 pm

    Ebert did not think that the ‘jackass’ should die hideously. He simply called him by the name Dunn self identified with. That is all. But people are attributing all sorts of bad things to what he said that I could see from reading his twitter, he did not mean. Ebert, with his own experience of alcoholism and physical destruction from cancer has little sympathy for Dunn’s boastful, self destructive tendencies. Perhaps, had Dunn lived to be the age Ebert did, he would have too. Now we will never find out and that is Dunn’s fault, not Ebert’s.

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  51. coozledad said on June 22, 2011 at 6:38 am

    Ebert pisses them off because he’s called out their plaster saint, Limbaugh, several times. Just sit back and enjoy them twisting themselves into knots trying to find some moral equivalence between their lardy childboffer and a film/social critic of a liberal bent mentioning that an asshole in an overpriced car is no match for a couple of dozen trees.

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  52. Rob Daumeyer said on June 22, 2011 at 10:01 am

    Read the Martin books immediately. They won’t hurt your enjoyment of the show. I read all 4 without blinking a few years ago, and I’m not a fantasy guy. The show was spectacular, wasn’t it? Not sure why all the nudity was needed, but at least there were also a few ugly wieners to keep things fair.

    Your blog kicks ass.


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