The Big Lebowski branded merch. But of course.
Sally’s hillbilly cheeseburger.
beb said on August 13, 2012 at 12:39 pm
Dorothy said on August 13, 2012 at 1:32 pm
Have to agree with The Dude. I can’t stand The Eagles either.
Prospero said on August 13, 2012 at 1:51 pm
I’m no fan of the Eagles, but once the real Joe Walsh joined the band, they made some good rock ‘n’ roll songs, like Heartache Tonight, The Greeks Don’t Want No Freaks and Life in the Fast Lane. Speaking of which, the deadbeat dad Joe Walsh is at it again:
Here’s some funny stuff about Ryan and Ayn Rand. I don’t know about y’all, but I couldn’t get past a few pages of The Fountainhead. She was not a good writer. But she was an “intellectual”. Just ask Eddie Munster Ryan.
I prefer Sally Rand to Ayn. Sally famously said, “I haven’t been out of work since the first time I took my clothes off.”
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 13, 2012 at 1:58 pm
But an Eagles album cover really pulls the room together.
MichaelG said on August 13, 2012 at 2:08 pm
Sally’s hillbilly cheeseburger: Where’s the beef?
Deborah said on August 13, 2012 at 2:43 pm
I like Desperado by the Eagles.
brian stouder said on August 13, 2012 at 2:44 pm
Sally’s hillbilly cheeseburger: Where’s the beef?
Michael, I think you’ve hit on it! I think this is a clever political statement, an homage to the old (and losing!) question posed by Mondale to RWR. And this year, the answer is – FORGET THE BEEF! WE WANT RAW MEAT!! WHERE’S THE BLOODY RAW MEAT??!
Sue said on August 13, 2012 at 2:50 pm
But give me Linda’s version, anytime.
Crazycatlady said on August 13, 2012 at 2:56 pm
The Dude Abides.
Deborah said on August 13, 2012 at 2:59 pm
Sue, yes I love Linda’s version too. Even better. But the Eagles wrote it, Glenn Frey and Don Henley, so she started with a good song.
basset said on August 13, 2012 at 3:09 pm
Meanwhile, “The Dude Classic Slip-On Shoes” at Bass Pro Shops… note the tread pattern:
Am I the only one around here who wears ugly shoes?
brian stouder said on August 13, 2012 at 4:07 pm
I had a post with a link to the Rockports I wear, but it vanished into the ether.
Suffice it to say,Basset – you are not alone!
(and – I liked Connie’s summery photo of her husband and tomatoes, from the last thread, too)
MichaelG said on August 13, 2012 at 4:09 pm
Basset, I don’t think anyone under 65 is allowed to wear those shoes.
Count me as a vote for Linda.
Prospero said on August 13, 2012 at 4:18 pm
Desperado is a key reason I don’t really like the Eagles. I’ve known too many people that act like the song was written about them, and that “let somebody love you” business is about as mawkish and annoying as cheap sentiment gets.
Linda Rondstadt is a great interpreter of other people’s songs, but she should have left Poor, Poor, Pitiful Me alone. Gender doesn’t translate in that song. It’s like Joan Baez singing The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down, but worse.
I don’t wear shoes at all. Teyva sandals nearly year round. Converse All-Stars when it’s too chilly for sandals. Misshapen feet. Those shoes of Basset’s might work. They look like the shoes advertised with Sansabelt slacks in Parade Magazine. But shouldn’t those be White Russians on the soles?
I just found out that Lupe Ontiveros died at the end of July. Not only did she play the maid, Rosalita, in The Goonies, she was also in the great El Norte, and played the mother of GoGo Gomez on The White Shadow.
No pen, no write, no sign:
She was also in the delightful movie, Real Women Have Curves, with America Ferrera.
MarkH said on August 13, 2012 at 4:23 pm
“Sally’s Hillbilly Cheesburger”.
Methinks Nancy has paid a visit to one of her old haunts (and mine, and maybe Kirk’s), The Red Door Tavern in Columbus.
Jolene said on August 13, 2012 at 4:52 pm
Based on his Facebook postings, it appears that Jeff (tmmo) has a new job. Are you going to fill us in, Jeff? What will this new position mean for your work at the court and with the housing group?
Kirk said on August 13, 2012 at 4:53 pm
Haven’t been to the Red Door in quite a while, but they make some mighty fine pies there. Excellent bean soup, too.
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 13, 2012 at 5:26 pm
It’s complicated! 😉
Prospero said on August 13, 2012 at 6:25 pm
Actual hillbillies of my acquaintance would call that a ‘mater sammich.
Deborah said on August 13, 2012 at 6:27 pm
Prospero, that’s one way to look at Desperado, but I found this on songfacts.com “On the surface, this is about a cowboy who refuses to fall in love, but it could also be about a young man who discovers guitars, joins a band, pays his dues and suffers for his art. The stress of being a Rock Star is a recurring theme in Eagles music (e.g. “Life In The Fast Lane”). The overall theme is how you must suffer for your art.”
Kim said on August 13, 2012 at 7:54 pm
Almost completely off-topic here except it concerns Mr. Sweet Juniper!, who made the lede of a NYT Sunday reader on the new normal: highly educated, stay-at-home dads. Read it here, and apologies if this has made the comment thread already. Between the job and indulging one child’s desire to road trip there’s been zero time to comment, though ya’ll often get me laughing and thinking.
Little Bird said on August 13, 2012 at 8:41 pm
Anybody else see this and have their jaw hit the keyboard?
Isn’t this the same group that keeps saying there is no way the whole of humankind could effect the weather?
Connie said on August 13, 2012 at 9:00 pm
Thanks for the comments on my husband’s odd tomato container garden (picture link late in yesterday’s comments). It is in the driveway rather than the yard because then he doesn’t to mow around it. As for the gate, well it came home with him from his walk one day. What he is keeping out I have no clue.
brian stouder said on August 13, 2012 at 9:01 pm
Little Bird – that is just rich, isn’t it?
Here’s an honest question I would have for Representative Ryan or Governor Romney.
Now that they have incorporated the out-of-context nugget “you didn’t build that” into their respective stump speeches, my question would be:
If we agree that “you DID build that” – that every successful business woman and business man “built that” and gets all the credit –
then when times are bad, how do we then BLAME the government? If “you built that” only when it succeeds, but it is the government’s fault whenever things don’t work out – aren’t we essentially being asked to treat business people like attention-starved 6 year olds? Aren’t we telling them sweet little lies about how special they are, when things work out; and/or shielding them from reality if we blame that mean ol’ president when things don’t go well?
In short, doesn’t the “you didn’t build that” thing that the R’s keep hitting the president with obliterate the very thing they want to convict the president of?
Dave said on August 13, 2012 at 9:21 pm
Yes, Desperado is the rock band as outlaws. One of my favorite albums back whenever it was released. Aha, I see it was 1973. Oh my, that makes it only 39 years old.
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 13, 2012 at 10:10 pm
Okay, mildly deranged first official day over. I’m the newly confirmed pastor for Central Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) in Newark, Ohio — feel free to drop by any Sunday morning! We worship at 8:30 & 10:30 am with a Wednesday Bible study at 6:00 pm that is delightfully well attended. My work as a mediator will continue with the approval of the call committee and the elders of the congregation, since it’s only one day a week (plus a meeting or two here or there). I’d step out of the way of a new mediator, but the court administrator confirmed that if I quit wholesale, the position probably wouldn’t be filled, so I’m going to stay on call and we’ll see how the schedule works out.
My work with the housing coalition continues behind the scenes; I’d been board chair for six-plus years, and this a second round in that seat, so I really wanted last year to step back from my public role to encourage the development of new leadership and new ideas for LCCH. I’m part of the start-up board this year establishing a Child Advocacy Center here in our county for abused & molested children in co-operation with the main area hospital and law enforcement (a single central site for exams, forensic interviews, and general care & follow-up when molestation is reported of a child, rather than their having to be examined in an ER and interviewed about the incident by four different entities across multiple days or weeks; there’s an accreditation process for CACs that we’re pursuing), and that with some community mental health education issues are displacing my housing work for now.
It’s not like the challenge of adequate low-cost housing for low-income working families will go away, let alone the need for supportive housing options for mental health or AOD recovery individuals. Anyhow, the congregation hired me knowing full well of my tendencies to create community furors from time to time over anything from fair housing to preservation of Native American antiquities. In fact, we may have a unique claim as a congregation: we’ve had parishoners appear in national ads for both Obama & Romney! If you saw the Obama ad for women’s reproductive health where a woman says “I don’t think Romney understands women’s concerns” you’ve met not only a parishoner of Newark Central, she works “next to” Dorothy of this blog community. We’re a rich brew of conservative, liberal, and libertarian Christians who all potluck together with great joy and joie-de-vivre!
DellaDash said on August 13, 2012 at 11:16 pm
Huh! Love the Eagles!
Catherine said on August 13, 2012 at 11:59 pm
Jeff tmmo, congratulations. It sounds like an amazing congregation, for which you are the perfect fit.
I read recently (here?) that Habitat for Humanity is the sixth-largest homebuilder in the U.S. so, as you say, the need for low cost housing is clear.
Minnie said on August 14, 2012 at 12:28 am
Jeff tmmo, so pleased to hear of your recent confirmation. Your community activities will only add value to your pastorship.
Sherri said on August 14, 2012 at 1:12 am
Best wishes, Jeff tmmo.
Dexter said on August 14, 2012 at 2:15 am
Damn…after 208 years with this I still never won more than a C-Note.
jcburns said on August 14, 2012 at 3:04 am
Congratulations, Jeff. Don’t let the sound of your own wheels, make you crazy.
Still trying to wrap my head around the Red Door Tavern still being in existence. Some things never change in my home town. Wait, I think that’s Paul Simon.
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 14, 2012 at 7:16 am
JC, I’m already gone.
basset said on August 14, 2012 at 7:58 am
Love the first two Eagles albums. The rest… not so much.
That’s a ‘mater sammich? I thought it was fried baloney.
The old cast-iron wood stove at our deer camp in Michigan was made in Newark, Ohio… a Wehrle “Wonder.”
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 14, 2012 at 8:12 am
Wehrle built Newark. And (fun history fact) Ohio Dominican and the Josephinum in Columbus.
Just tore down the factory two years ago, and boy is there a story there . . . that whole area actually was a vast, intensely utilized Indian burial ground 2,000 years ago. The Wray Figurine was dug out of a sub-basement there, and a huge mound with a few centuries’ worth of episodic burials is still encased in the rail embankment alongside of the Wehrle plant, some 14 feet high & 40 feet across at base, something we only just figured out. We paused there in our hike on Saturday for the ancientohiotrail.org project, and a Dakota man offered a Sun Dance song and closed it with a salute on an eagle bone whistle before we finished the 8.5 mile walk from river to river through the Newark Earthworks.
Dorothy said on August 14, 2012 at 8:19 am
Hey Kirk – have you tried the pizza at the new coal-fired pizza place yet? It’s called Natalie’s and it’s on North High Street in Worthington. Mike and I haven’t found a pizza place that we love in Ohio yet, and I have high hopes for this place.
brian stouder said on August 14, 2012 at 9:32 am
Congratulations, Jeff, and Godspeed! (and/or, may the Force be with you)
Mary, I clicked your links at the end of the last thread, and the funniest part was the person’s title, as in:
Aesthetic Realism Consultant Nancy Huntting
alex said on August 14, 2012 at 9:52 am
Congrats, Jeff! I know you’ve been wanting a change for a while. Hope this one satisfies.
In other news, man bites dog (i.e., politico reports that Republicans smell the shit on their own shoes).
basset said on August 14, 2012 at 10:17 am
Jeff, we have smaller burial grounds all over Middle Tennessee… lots of individual stone-box graves… and the remains of an ancient city about ten miles from my house:
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 14, 2012 at 10:23 am
Thanks, Alex. It’s time to have one full time job plus a part time job and some freelance writing, versus five part time jobs!
For anyone curious about Child Advocacy Centers, we just got this up, and it needs some work, but it’s a start: http://www.cacoflc.org/
Jolene said on August 14, 2012 at 10:32 am
Congrats from me, too, Jeff. Tell us a little about your congregation.
MichaelG said on August 14, 2012 at 10:52 am
A coal fired pizza oven?
Deborah said on August 14, 2012 at 10:56 am
Congratulations Pastor Jeff! I won’t be calling you Jeff tmmo anymore.
Dorothy, Coal fired pizza doesn’t sound so good to me, like the kind of place you’d walk out of with black gunk lining the inside of your nose.
Great Politico link Alex.
Prospero said on August 14, 2012 at 11:10 am
The Ryan bump in the polls seems to be more like a speed bump.
Happiness in the new job, Jeff:
Prospero said on August 14, 2012 at 11:11 am
I hope that coal-fired pizza oven has a high efficiency electrostatic precipitator attached to it.
Joe K said on August 14, 2012 at 11:13 am
Congrats Jeff, I know a bit about working at a church, Mrs Pilot Joe is the financial sec and office mgr at first united here in Auburn.
LAMary said on August 14, 2012 at 11:13 am
This might sound like a stupid question, but is Newark, Ohio pronounce New Ark or Newurk, as in Delaware or New Jersey, respectively?
brian stouder said on August 14, 2012 at 11:14 am
Re coal-fired pizza: Here in Fort Wayne a new place opened called 800-degree wood-fired pizza
The place here is brand new – opened but not finished (or at least, it didn’t look like they were finished) and the fellows and I went there for lunch.
It was a little pricey (I think I spent $10 for lunch, including tip, which would have seemed like a bargain if it were a dollar or two less, but that’s just my small-mindedness), but it was very good, and I’d go back
Kaye said on August 14, 2012 at 11:32 am
Newark, Ohio = Nerk, Ahia
MarkH said on August 14, 2012 at 11:33 am
LAMary — Nerk.
LAMary said on August 14, 2012 at 12:07 pm
Thanks. I might do a national Newark crawl one of these years and I need to sound informed at each stop.
Prospero said on August 14, 2012 at 12:29 pm
How does anybody think this is acceptable, and hate speech is not free speech, nor are obvious veiled threats of extreme violence. It’s also kinda fracking stupid, along the lines of keeping government hands off your Medicare. Triumphal American exceptionalist bullshit would have been rampant had Shrub ever managed to nab OBL. President Obama had nothing to do with tracking the bastard down, according to these ignorant rubes.
Future of American health care for profit the RMoney/Ryan way. Turning vouchers into welfare for very rich people.
jcburns said on August 14, 2012 at 12:31 pm
My college roommate at Athens (Nancy remembers her I suspect) was from Newark, Delaware, and she made sure to “correct” anyone proudly and loudly about the pronunciation of that town, even if it was the Ohio version. I’d tell her “no, really, it’s Nerk.”
LAMary said on August 14, 2012 at 12:33 pm
In NJ it’s actually more like Nuwuk.
Julie Robinson said on August 14, 2012 at 12:54 pm
Jeff, I’ll pray for your ministry and your sanity. I know my pastor daughter already works more than full-time at just one job, but I also understand servant hearts.
Joe, I’m financial secretary at our church. Does your wife use Power Church?
Best pizza here in the Fort is at Chez Robinson. We like Chicago deep dish and no one here does it justice, so I’ve developed my own. I make the crust with whole wheat flour, and right now can add fresh tomatoes and basil from my garden. I gotta say, I’m getting hungry just thinking about it.
Dorothy said on August 14, 2012 at 12:54 pm
Mary – the locals pronounce it “Nerk”. I can never tell if that is a joke or not – my co-workers say it emphatically and with a smile. Like they’re letting you in on the joke. Not being a local I pronounce it Newurk, as in NJ.
And I can understand the perplexed feelings about trying coal-fired pizza. I just want to try it once to see if it improves upon the drab pizza we usually find at the Mom and Pop locations. I know I won’t be replacing Mineo’s of Pittsburgh around here, but the concept of coal-fired sounds intriguing. I’ve had wood-fired pizza and it’s really good. Found out the name of the place in Richmond VA where I had delish pizza on May 4th: Blowtoad!
LAMary said on August 14, 2012 at 12:58 pm
Speaking of Ohio. What’s Cleveland like? There’s a job there I’m considering for. I have no ingrained anti-rustbelt prejudices.
MichaelG said on August 14, 2012 at 1:01 pm
I’ve got one for all you architects and engineers and designers out there. One of the guys here has a project to do a seismic retrofit on a building in a Southern California prison and is on vacation in New York at the moment. The job is out to bid. Something (I don’t know what, it’s not my project) provoked some changes and the design consultant (some firm from Irvine) produced an addendum with thirty two drawing sheets. The boss asked me to get the addendum dwgs signed off by the State Fire Marshal. So before taking the dwgs to the Fire Marshal I thought I’d take a look at them to make sure they were done right.
Boy. They had no current issue date, there were no deltas, the dwgs were not marked as addendum number whatever,, there was no statement telling the viewer to exchange it with the original, there were no clouds for the changes, the signature was black and looked like a copy … Except for the changes, whatever they may have been, the drawing sheets were identical to the original ones. There was nothing to identify them as different.
All I could think of was WTF? I showed the stuff to the boss and let him call the design firm. They wouldn’t have wanted to take a call from me. Have any of you ever gotten any crap like that? Why wouldn’t a big time firm conform to basic standards?
Prospero said on August 14, 2012 at 1:03 pm
This behavior by Ayn Ryan was pretty fracking Randian. This is classic It’s All Right If You’re a Republican. If Martha Stewart did this, she’d be back in jail.
Power Church sounds like that whited sepulchre, moneychanging creep Rick Warren.
Dorothy said on August 14, 2012 at 1:03 pm
Cleveland gets one helluva lot of lake-effect snow, Mary. And they have a pretty crappy football team. If you can live with those two things, you’ve got it made.
jcburns said on August 14, 2012 at 1:24 pm
Cleveland is sprawly enough that I think your quality of life depends on what part you settle in (plenty of folks who commute from as far away as Sandusky, Canton, Ashtabula.)
Dexter said on August 14, 2012 at 1:24 pm
Saving Detroit’s Dogs;
bassett…you win the thread, because, of course it is indeed a fried baloney sammitch. 😉
alex said on August 14, 2012 at 1:26 pm
Nerk, eh? How’s about Bal-da-mer. That’s in Mairlind.
basset said on August 14, 2012 at 1:28 pm
If you’re in Colorado, Oklahoma, or Arkansas, you call the Arkansas River the “Arkansaw”… in Kansas, though, it’s the “Ar-Kansas.” And, for some reason, the Kansas River is the “Kaw.”
Bonus points for any of y’all from north of Indy who can properly pronounce “Loogootee.”
del said on August 14, 2012 at 1:28 pm
Cleveland’s downtown area has been developing nicely in recent years based on my visits and the reports from my brother who lived there for a time. Detroit’s trying for something of a Cleveland/Pittsburgh revitalization.
Dorothy said on August 14, 2012 at 1:34 pm
Speaking of pronunciations, this one is for Laura Lippman: I’m currently reading I’d Know You Anywhere. And when I read that the main character’s mother was a counselor/psychiatrist at a place that had the name “Patuxent” in it, I had to smile. When my daughter and I were at the Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival in early May we used her iPhone as a GPS. The way the iPhone voice pronounced Patuxent just cracked us UP! The heaviest accent was on the middle syllable, like “pah-TOOOO-xzent”. We went around the block twice just to make it say it a couple more times. I’m sure she was saying it correctly – her accent was just kind of wildly fun.
Prospero said on August 14, 2012 at 1:36 pm
@62 When that photo first showed up on my screen yesterday, and for several hours afterward, that slice was tomato red. Now it looks like purple baloney wrapper.
Dexter said on August 14, 2012 at 1:48 pm
alex, my army buddy from Baltimore said “Bal-tuh-murr”. Philly people say “Ball-more”. There are two other ways, also.
New Jersey has many different voice inflections, too. A few miles makes all the difference.
As I have said before here at nn.c, I grew up just about 40 miles west of where I am now (Bryan, Ohio), and everyone over there near Kendallville, Indiana said “Uh-high-uh”. Over here only a few folks say it that way, most say O-high-O.
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 14, 2012 at 1:53 pm
Cleveland has more snow the more easterly you go, but as someone said, the surrounding area has something for everyone, even without a brutal commute. Nerk, Ahia is said unironically by the long-term local oldsters, but the younger lifers or newer folks do say it with an arch of the eyebrows . . . but no one, and I mean no one, makes jokes about the county name, which is fascinating.
Licking County, Ohio.
Anyhow, Central Christian is a Disciples of Christ congregation; our denominational affiliation – http://www.disciples.org – is currently headed by a “general minister & president” who is a friend and colleague of many years, Sharon Watkins, who is part of Pres. Obama’s ministerial support. You can find couples in a Disciples congregation who still give their new pastor books by Jimmy Swaggart (he said, looking askance at the middle of his desk as he types), and those who gift him with a Kindle pre-order of the new Marcus Borg critical study of Scripture. We look and act much like Joe’s UMC congregation weekdays, but our main service might lean a bit more liturgical like Julie’s ELCA, except the prayer at the table is from a congregational elder, with me offering the words of institution as the church communes together in their seats, the deacons having taken communion out to the pews. And when we baptize, we look kind of Baptist, because we dunk ya. Good. As in all the way, including water up your nose. We try to avoid the water up the nose, but it won’t kill you. Unless it will, in which case we sprinkle in the hospital bed or at home and feel faintly guilty about it.
Anybody want a Swaggart commentary on Acts? Wait, no, they inscribed it for me. (Sigh.) He also is worried that my reading the Sunday texts from my Kindle Fire in the pulpit will encourage young people to bring “those electronic devices to church.” When I answered brightly “yes, that’s exactly my hope” he honestly didn’t know what to say. After a pause, he said “Welllll, would you like it if they started using them to send texts and look at the internet during the sermon?” His silence was even longer when I replied “I sure would, and if I’m doing my job, those texts will be about the message, and they’ll look on the internet to check out what I’m saying.” “It’s a new world, isn’t it, preacher?” I just smiled back at him.
Joe K said on August 14, 2012 at 2:08 pm
LAMary said on August 14, 2012 at 2:16 pm
Cleveland Clinic has a vacancy for a recruiter and I might be out of a job in a few months. All of us in recruiting have to apply for and interview for our jobs and only 80 percent of the current recruiters will have jobs when all is said and done. Combine this situation with my ex trying to force me to sell the house we own together and I might very well be looking for a new job and a home at the same time. The great catch 22 of the house situation is I can’t afford to buy much of a house in LA with the cash I’d get from selling the one I’m in after I pay the attorney and split the procedes with the ex. I have three dogs and three cats and two sons, so I can’t really move into an apartment, so I’m looking at places where 600 sq foot houses don’t go for 250k in sketchy neighborhoods. Forget nice neighborhoods. They’re way out of reach for me.
Or everything could be fine and I keep my job and my ex backs down in which case I don’t have to start over completely at age 59.
My ex lives in Malibu, rent free, with his girlfriend. He says he wants his cash out of the house because he’s sick of me “living it up on his money.” He has cut off child support because legally he is not obligated to contribute to the kids once they hit 18. This has been going on for the last six months and I’ve held him at bay so far, but we have a negotiation meeting next week with our attorneys. Let’s all keep a good thought for the employee assistance attorney my employer has provided.
Scout said on August 14, 2012 at 2:19 pm
Another town pronunciation that differs depending on the state is Lancaster. In PA, it’s LANKaster, all three syllables spoken rapidly. Most of the rest are Lann-caster, with the first syllable drawn out a bit.
Bob (not Greene) said on August 14, 2012 at 2:36 pm
Preacher. I just love that. From now on it’s Preacher all the way, Jeff. I don’t get to call many people that ’round these parts.
Deborah said on August 14, 2012 at 2:36 pm
I agree that wood fired pizza is delicious as is just about any food that is wood fired.
I think Cleveland is a great city. I haven’t spent much time there, but my husband designed the addition to the Federal Reserve bank there. Which is a very nice building if I do say so. I designed some eagle motifs for it that are modernized versions of the eagles on the original bank which is, by the way a spectacular building of pinkish Georgia marble, which my husband used on the addition as well. The eagles I designed were supposed to be carved in the same marble but the cost was prohibitive so they were made of glazed terra cotta by a company in Sacramento, Gladding McBean. The medallions are 4′ in diameter which at the time were the largest they had ever made without exploding in the kilns.
Michael G, I’m not surprised to hear your story of the condition of the drawings you received, especially from a large firm. Things fall through the cracks sometimes.
mark said on August 14, 2012 at 2:37 pm
“After a pause, he said ‘Welllll, would you like it if they started using them to send texts and look at the internet during the sermon?’ His silence was even longer when I replied ‘I sure would, and if I’m doing my job, those texts will be about the message, and they’ll look on the internet to check out what I’m saying.’”
Wellll, pastor, congratulations on the position and best wishes with the impossible definition of success you have articulated for yourself to a doubtful parishoner.
Why not encourage the kids to text throughout the family dinner, too? If you and the missus are doing your job, they will just be sharing heart-warming family moments and sage advice with distant relatives. There will always be time for family, but a lost texting opportunity can never be recovered.
As one of those in the pews already distracted by the buzzing, humming and occasional beeping and ringing, and the constant clicking, tapping and fidgeting, of the brazenly internet-connected among my fellow worshippers, I’m not real enthusiastic about your plans.
Catherine said on August 14, 2012 at 2:39 pm
ClevelandMary does not have a bad ring to it.
Also, greedy exes suck.
Kirk said on August 14, 2012 at 2:45 pm
Dorothy, we have not been to the coal-fired pizza place, nor have I heard any reports. I assume that’s the one we had a story about in the Business section last week.
I don’t eat nearly as much pizza as I used to (not that I love it any less), but my pie of choice comes from Panzera’s, at 3rd and Grandview in Grandview Heights.
According to that story about the coal-fired pizza place, it’s all the rage in New York City, for whatever that’s worth. It does sound kind of odd.
Kirk said on August 14, 2012 at 2:51 pm
On the coal-fired pizza, it supposedly is all the rage in New York City, for whatever that’s worth. Would have added to previous post, but it won’t let me edit.
Opps. Guess I have to take that back — about the editing, that is.
Dorothy said on August 14, 2012 at 3:02 pm
I can’t (and shouldn’t) speak for Jeff (tmmo), mark, but I think you’re being a little hard on him for the way he dealt with the older preacher. Shouldn’t we give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he would find a way to weave a lesson into why people need to be paying attention in church instead of fiddling with their phones or iPads? Jeff is exceptional in his commenting here when it comes to being fair and balanced with his opinions. I like his odds for finding a way to get his message across to all generations in his church.
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 14, 2012 at 3:02 pm
mark, what he wanted was for me to stop using my Kindle to read from in Bible study & on Sunday, and “set a better example” by going back to reading from a book-version Bible. I don’t fear people having Kindles in worship, not because I don’t think people can be tempted in the face of my awesome preaching (hahahahahaha), but because the temptation has to be balanced with the opportunity. And the opportunity factor in trying to bludgeon younger worshipers into using dead-tree when that’s not what they read on at work, in school, or for leisure, is pretty low. If they get used to reading their Bibles on the same tech they carry around anyhow, I call that win/win. And put that tablet down at the dinner table, young man. (Distinctions can be made!)
Update: thank you kindly, Dorothy; hadn’t seen yr comment yet when I posted. I’m aware that cell phones and pocket devices are a distraction, as are TVs on end caps at the store and having fourteen different translations out in the pews when I ask someone to read from their Bible. But if I wax too nostalgic for the days when everyone had the same translation, with the choice of two colors for the binding or large print for grandma, a crank phone on the wall, and women staying in the kitchen cleaning up when the congregational meeting started, I’ll . . . you know. As an elderly clergy colleague used to keep joking (I think), “once we let the women start wearing shoes . . .”
Moe would chastise me regularly for my levity when it came to my religious statements, which I always answered by reminding her that I took my religion far too seriously to take it seriously. I didn’t convince her, and that’s probably what got me my three or four no votes at the church, too.
Danny said on August 14, 2012 at 3:10 pm
I took my kindle to church a few times when I first got it, but I stopped mainly because of the several versions of the Bible I had, none of them were as easily navigable as the real book version.
Now get off of my lawn. Jeff!
Scout said on August 14, 2012 at 3:10 pm
Preach it, Pastor Jeff!
mark said on August 14, 2012 at 3:12 pm
Jeff/Dorothy- It wasn’t my intention to be hard on Jeff at all. I think he sets an impossible standard for himself if he thinks a “good” preacher will have the young folks using their iPhones during the service to bring up maps of the Holy Land or facebook about the sermon rather than check what Snooki and Kanye West are tweeting. Really, would you say that a school teacher that is “doing her job” should encourage unrestricted smart phone usage during class because the students will be moved to text and tweet only or largely about the class subject matter? And maybe the smart phone use isn’t noticeable from behind the pulpit, but it is, I think, getting pretty bad from the perspective from the cheap seats.
brian stouder said on August 14, 2012 at 3:20 pm
I was once reliably told that a native of Lancaster PA would pronounce it “Lanxter”; and let’s not forget our peers who live in Pierre, South Dakota (I have been corrected by a customer or two, when I said ‘Pee-air’).
Mary – I don’t know about Cleveland, but you could buy a very, very, very nice home in Fort Wayne for less than $200K. Honestly, I don’t think it would cost more than 90K to buy the nicest house in our neighborhood (the nicest ones have two stories and a basement, and a reasonably-sized yard and 2-car garage. The least you could do would be a single story on a slab with 3 bedrooms, 2 baths, a garage, and a reasonably-sized yard, which describes our house!).
I bet the Cleveland area offers something similar…or, there’s always Fort Wayne! Hell, they just built a palatial new hospital hereabouts, and I bet they could use an HR person such as yourself. (Just sayin’…)
MarkH said on August 14, 2012 at 3:22 pm
Scout, it’s LANKaster in Ohio as well. I always thought PA was LANNcaster, but learned different awhile back. I think California is definitely LANNcaster.
Mary, there are some beautiful settings to the east and northeast of Cleveland. My sister and brother-in-law had a nice home out in Concord Township, south of Chardon. And I agree with others here that there is much to like about the revitalization of cities like Cleveland and Pittsburgh.
Julie Robinson said on August 14, 2012 at 3:29 pm
mark, those distractions are no different than a baby crying or feedback from the sound system, just part of life. If you want a real distraction, try dealing with a homeless guy who walks in, sits down, and proceeds to have a ten minute long grand mal seizure, during which he flails around the pew and fights off everyone trying to help him, all the while cursing at them, and ultimately refusing the assistance even of the EMS guys, who were quite familiar with him. Now that’s what I call a distraction. Bring on the crying babies and texting teens; I’m glad to see them on Sunday morning.
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 14, 2012 at 3:31 pm
mark – interesting note from your perspective, and I didn’t think you were being hard on me a’tall. I don’t end up in large auditorium contemporary Christian service venues much, and I’ve wondered if that’s different than in a small to medium-large venue with pews and hymnals (make that, “assumed,” not wondered).
I found it initially intimidating and then exhilarating in teaching a seminary class last semester (it had been three years): the entire class was online the whole time, and when I’d idly mention something, and note I wasn’t sure about a date or a name, someone ten seconds later would raise a hand and have it. And occasionally, a hand would go up: “Uh, Jeff, there’s a source from the SBL that says these inscriptions . . .” You can fight it as some profs do, or you can figure out how to use the momentum and energy to flip it in your preferred direction. But you can’t make it go away. You can pretend it’s not there, but . . .
Edit: Julie, is that Archie? Just talked to him . . . wait, you aren’t in Ohio . . .
On the other hand, I’ve been up to college lecture presentations where from the far back, I can see at least three video poker players among 150 in the hall. A multi-edged weapon, to be sure.
Jolene said on August 14, 2012 at 3:59 pm
But those video poker players have been the guys screwing around in the back row forever–whatever the technology available to them or the professor. I’ve been away from classrooms for a dozen years. Wish I knew more about what’s going on in university pedagogy given all the technological change in that time. Anybody have interesting examples?
Sue said on August 14, 2012 at 4:05 pm
MMJeff, we can start using electronic devices in church now?
You mean I don’t have to do my grocery list in my head during the sermon anymore?
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 14, 2012 at 4:14 pm
Danny said on August 14, 2012 at 4:26 pm
What Jeff meant to say: No, Sue, but you’ll have plenty of time to do your grocery list when you are in H-E-Double-Hockey-Sticks!
Sue said on August 14, 2012 at 4:35 pm
MMJeff and Danny:
Well, obviously, being a child of God, if I’m doing my grocery list in my head during the sermon it’s because I’m not being CHALLENGED enough.
Prospero said on August 14, 2012 at 4:39 pm
Padre Jeff@87: Puts me in mind of the greatest TV preacher ever, Pator Melissa Scott. I’d like to check her apparenlty miraculous command of ancient biblical languages on the net while she’s covering that whiteboard. Just amazing. I’ve always wondered how much her congregants get out of her lightning presentation. My Greek is way to rusty to keep up except for pronunciation. She’s the widow of Dr. Gene Scott, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he died during conjugal relations. Pastoor Melissa also sings blues for Jesus with her crack studio band in an incredibly sultry, lower register voice. Where did Pastor Scott learn ancient Hebrew and Greek, and Aramaic? Anyway, Melissa Scott is a TV preacher for the electronic age, right down to her porn star history.
I find this woman fascinating, which bugs the crap out of my partner.
Kaye said on August 14, 2012 at 5:06 pm
LAMary, I think you would find much to like about life in Cleveland. An equally vibrant life in a lovely home is possible at a dramatically reduced cost of living. I think you would win even if you took a cut in salary. No ex involved in your life – that’s a positive too. The museums at University Circle and the ethnic groceries call to me even in Columbus. The lake-effect dumps snow on the east side of town. My buddies in the far west burbs receive little more snow than Central Ohio. Few earthquakes, no wildfires, no monsoons, no mudslides. Are you packed yet?
LAMary said on August 14, 2012 at 5:06 pm
Brian, I will definitely check out the job situation in Fort Wayne.
Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on August 14, 2012 at 5:19 pm
And LAMary, my friend & esteemed colleague Allen Harris pastors one of our most vital & progressive congregations (in our denomination or in the US, either way) on the near westside of Cleveland, Franklin Circle. I’ve worshiped rarely in a church that could bring together traditional style services with a contemporary feel, with a range of demographics of age, income, & ethnicity that is sadly unique for mainline Protestant congregations.
Peter said on August 14, 2012 at 5:36 pm
Michael G at 58: Although I would be so happy to pile on, there may be a mitigating circumstance. In Illinois, and especially in Chicago, you can’t have addendum bubbles, annotations or alternates on a permit drawing. The legal concept behind it is that the submitted permit drawings are the actual representation of what will be built on site. Anything prior to permit submittal doesn’t count – that’s not the permit authority’s problem. Any changes after permit submittal usually requires a revised permit, where those changes have to be highlighted.
And you’re welcome to e-mail me with any other questions: firstname.lastname@example.org
And you and your firm don’t have to worry about me poaching work – I’m not licensed in California, and I passed my structures exams over 30 years ago, so there’s no way I’m going to study and pass a long span/seismic test now.
Joe K said on August 14, 2012 at 5:40 pm
She says church windows
nancy said on August 14, 2012 at 5:54 pm
Just weighing in (oof!) to say I can’t believe how many of you people don’t recognize a fried bologna sandwich when you see one. Although that might be my last. It just didn’t do it for me, and I felt bad afterward. A chapter has ended. That used to be my No. 1 guilty pleasure.
MichaelG said on August 14, 2012 at 5:58 pm
I’m sorry to hear about the discord with the Ex, Mary. Break ups are tough enough without that unhappiness. I hope something can be worked out next week.
Thanks, Peter. I don’t work for a firm, I work for the State of CA. We don’t have permit drawings, we have working drawings that are signed off for construction. An addendum changes the original drawing so it has to be certified as if it were the original and it has to be identified as an addendum and the changes have to be identified. We have contractors maintain an annotated set of drawings as the job progresses and at the end provide us with a set of “as builts”. There can be lots of changes between the issuance of construction drawings and the finish of a job.
MichaelG said on August 14, 2012 at 6:00 pm
A fried bologna sandwich. Hmm. Did they heat it in a coal fired oven?
Jolene said on August 14, 2012 at 6:55 pm
So here’s something going on in the world that I bet you didn’t know about: a contest to reinvent the toilet. Pretty cool, actually. The idea is to develop solutions to sanitation problems in the developing world, but, as population grows and water shortages become more common, it may be that our water-intensive systems will also need to change.
Scout said on August 14, 2012 at 7:41 pm
LAMary, I think they made a TV series about you. It’s called Hot in Cleveland. So which one are you? The Valerie Bertinelli, Wendie Mallick or Jane Leeves character? I know you’re not Betty White!
Prospero said on August 14, 2012 at 7:48 pm
Composting toilets have been around a long time. First I ever heard of was the Clivus Multrum in the very early 70s. I think they are still making them. I have stayed in hunting camps in the maine woods that had these fixtures and they seemed to work well.
I write construction specifications and contract documents, and I’m a stickler for a meticulously detailed paper trail of changes from original documents on which contracts or bids were based. This has always turned out to be a valuable practice when large projects reach the inevitable final phase: litigation or arbitration. The architects that are my clients are as likely as anybody else to try to blame me for SNAFUs, even though they use whiteout and correction tape to change my documents. I keep everything in password-protected electronic versions. If a client gives me addendum ed drawings or details altered by sketches, I won’t write addenda until they are bubbled and marked with deltas. In both litigation and arbitration, the issues are judged by people that can’t read drawings, so I’m very careful to keep the English version clear as a bell, including descriptions of changes to drawings. As a result, I love that last part of the process, and usually make money from it. Discretion is the better part of getting your ass sued.
LAMary said on August 14, 2012 at 8:12 pm
Right now it’s Hot in LA. Over 100 for the past week. I’ve had the kiddie pool out for the dogs so they can wallow like hippos. I’ve been working late because my office is very air conditioned and my house is not. If I could bring the dogs to the office everything would be great.
I’ve never seen Hot in Cleveland, but I’ve always liked Wendy Malick so I’ll go with her.
Dexter said on August 14, 2012 at 8:37 pm
nance ain’t the only journo who at least used to love fried baloney sandwiches. Current TV’s Craig Crawford’s Trail Mix blog, a daily stop for me at Craigcrawford dot com, took a lot of ribbing on his blog for his undying love of a good fried baloney sammitch.
Dexter said on August 14, 2012 at 8:39 pm
On the side topic of blogs, ever check out the Mudcat? Mudcat Saunders is relentlessly on Eric Cantor’s lying, cheating, criminal ass.
Dorothy said on August 14, 2012 at 8:57 pm
My son had a fabulous time in Cleveland visiting two college buddies last weekend, and we’ve been there a few times to see plays (August: Osage County!!). It’s a very nice city, and I for one would be thrilled if you moved there, Mary. I’d have to grab Pastor Jeff and we’d do a road trip – and we’d stop at Natalie’s and bring you a coal-fired pizza as a Welcome To Ohio greeting!
Michael G thanks for that snorty laugh I got at the comment @ 101.
Prospero said on August 14, 2012 at 9:28 pm
First saw Wendy Malick in the hilarious Dream On, a 70s HBO (I think) comedy with Brian Benben. If you took a year’s worth of current sitcoms and added up all the actually funny jokes, it wouldn’t balance a single episode of Dream On.
Deborah said on August 14, 2012 at 9:54 pm
We have considered composting toilets for our place in NM. We have a friend in Taos who designs “earthships” (houses) off the grid with solar and wind power as well as collecting rainwater. He went to the Himalyas awhile back to demonstrate his solar toilets that fry shit.
Edit: hmmm… shit fired pizza
deb said on August 14, 2012 at 9:59 pm
Nance, I recognized the sammich, but only because you took me there for one once. It was sublime, as I recall. But I prolly couldn’t eat it now either.
And Jeff, late to the party, but heartiest congrats. Buckle up; having seen a little glimpse of what pastors go through, there is no doubt in my mind that it really is a calling. All the best to you.
Judybusy said on August 14, 2012 at 10:34 pm
Also really late here, Jeff, to offer my congratulations! Your kindness and sense of humor will serve the congregation well. Even those whose noses you tweak a bit.
MichaelG said on August 15, 2012 at 12:09 am
Starting over’s a bitch when you’re not so young, Mary. I split from my wife when I was 62 and had to move move to a new place. That was pretty bad (very bad, actually) but I still had my job. I remember when you got your job at the hospital in Burbank (?) some years ago. I hope things work out so that you don’t have to start over. But whatever happens, it sounds like you have a couple of great young men for support. You’ve always had my admiration. All my best.
Prospero, you exactly have it about changes to plans and specs. I don’t know how people do things back East. Do you use CSI standards and templates?
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