A little ragged around the edges.

The temperature kissed 90 degrees today. Took a yoga class that revealed my lack of natural balance but my amazing capacity for perspiration. Arose from savasana to find two texts and a voicemail alerting me of a problem. But because of my inner peace, I opened the sunroof, drove home and discovered the problem had been solved already. In one 45-minute Power Lunch class! That’s something.

Does your yoga teacher ever do visualization? It depends on the amount of woo-woo you’ve signed up for, but I had one a while back who simply wouldn’t. Shut up. About the golden corral we are supposed to visualize around our heart center, and all the glowingness within. Visualize your pure golden heart pushing out all the negativity, etc.

I thought, seriously, about what my heart would look like, and decided it simply has to be spotted with black mold here and there, because otherwise, what sort of life would I have led up to this point? You just have to tarnish the glow a little; otherwise you’re Siddhartha, or maybe Beyoncé.

So, bloggage:

I keep an eye on the Apple movie-trailers site, but so far haven’t seen anything from the Jessica Chastain menu for the coming fall, but I was fascinated by the photo in this story. If you want to know why film acting is difficult and they get the big bucks, imagine emoting with that thing in your face. It’s sort of like working up tears while you’re getting the air-puff test for glaucoma.

Wait, I already do that. Because of the air-puff.

Interesting: Cornel West and the insular, Obama-hating left.

Because every 9-year-old should know how to use an Uzi, don’t you agree?

Wednesday awaits.

Posted at 12:30 am in Same ol' same ol' |

38 responses to “A little ragged around the edges.”

  1. Dexter said on August 27, 2014 at 1:36 am

    Siddhartha found peace and ultimately wisdom, but you betcha he had a lot of moldy spots on his heart from the young man bullshit he pulled. Beyonce…kissed by fate, money, worshiping fans, undeniably talent…yeah, she’s the one who has no mold, only that glow.

    I was listening to Boston radio just now as I walked the Labbie dog, and host Bradley Jay was telling how it’s 70 there now, in the middle of the night, and it’s going to roast them out at 84 degrees later on today. Pity the bean eaters.
    Also, wire service news said FEMA was in Detroit inspecting and assessing damage from the recent biblical flooding when severe storms again knocked out power to many areas, and 60 mph winds tore up some trees and rooftops. It’s odd to me that Detroit and its ‘burbs keep getting blasted when I live in NW Ohio, not far south of Detroit, and we have had a totally calm summer, with no damaging rain, hail, or wind.
    And back to the Judgment Maps from yesterday: Detroit’s was the funniest one I found. Chicago’s I found to be mean and racist.

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  2. Dexter said on August 27, 2014 at 2:13 am

    Celebrity divorce ya say? Meh…who cares? But this one shocked me simply for the “it can’t be” factor. I guess we have to call this “Al and Tipper syndrome”.

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  3. Jeff Borden said on August 27, 2014 at 8:33 am

    I won’t celebrate the shooting death of the firearms instructor, but Balloon Juice posted some stuff from his Facebook page that suggests he was a true believer, a worshipper in the Church of the Second Amendment. Several of the posts suggests those who don’t love guns are a little light in the loafers, if you know what I mean. He can’t have been very bright. My dad, who had been issued a Thompson machine-gun in World War II before trading it for a standard carbine, said the kick was ridiculous and it was absolutely impossible to control. He used to laugh at war movies where the machine-gun bullets went across a wall in a straight line. Asking a little girl to keep it under control is beyond absurd.

    Many, many years ago, I was in Orlando reporting on how they were poaching convention business from Chicago. Several gun ranges advertised along the interstate that visitors could fire automatic weapons for just 50-cents per bullet. Some boasted of the weaponry you could shoot, ie., AK-37s, Uzis, Tech Nines, etc. I guess these places are indeed catering to tourists from places where automatic weapons are rare.

    I’m done with worrying about guns. I’m 63. Nothing is going to change before I kick and probably not after, either. If all the mass shootings including Sandy Hook can’t budge us, nothing will. We’ll just be a modern, industrialized nation with a heinous firearms death rate. . .a fine an example of American exceptionalism.

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  4. alex said on August 27, 2014 at 9:01 am

    About the golden corral we are supposed to visualize around our heart center …

    Sounds like a mnemonic to help us avoid low-rent buffet-style joints that serve heart attacks on dirty plates.

    Dex, the Chicago Judgmental Map was mellow compared to the real names for certain neighborhoods. As a fer instance, the stretch of Lake Shore Drive where I used to live near Wrigley Field was known as the Gaza Strip — because it had been largely overtaken by Jews, of course. There was another name for the area that rather pushed the envelope in terms of tastelessness but the old brain cells aren’t firing this morning.

    If the media weren’t so lazy, Cornel West would be held up as what a real leftist ideologue looks like when Fox et al. mythologize Obama as a communist tyrant and not the squishy moderate that he really is. Much as I agree with West on a litany of issues, I think he comes across as a churlish gasbag.

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  5. brian stouder said on August 27, 2014 at 9:50 am

    1. Alex – agreed 100%.

    Interestingly, the link posted by the proprietress almost immediately takes a look at Lincoln, who was as squishy as he could be – to his contemporaries – at all events.

    It would have been so much EASIER to be “ideologically pure”; it wouldn’t take a towering genius (such as Lincoln) to just always do what the radicals wanted. By way of saying that a president who is always thinking anew will always be accused of being squishy (when she’s not being accused of being an ideologue); and indeed, any politician has to always do some political “trimming”.

    Any goals she may be have would most usually be approached and addressed from different angles (if not tangentially), and often they’d be modified or dropped altogether, the better to keep most of the people behind her at any given time.

    That’s the art of it, really

    I was always struck by the icy-coldness/political brilliance of Lincoln’s absolute and steely insistence, when he was a political up-and-comer in Illinois, that slavery NOT be allowed to spread. Let it exist where it does – and in fact defend ALL of the “property” rights of the slavers where they already are – but absolutely and forever oppose its spread (right up ‘til Dredd Scott upset the apple cart, by we digress). That position still sounds like a very reasonable starting point….but think about what he’s really saying to the Illinois electorate (remembering that “the Illinois electorate” was 100% male white folks). It would address and allay white people’s racial prejudices and fears – fears of black people coming into Illinois – while at the same time opposing the southern Slave Power’s agenda. It was really a NIMBY appeal – and won him no love from the abolitionists.

    And while we digress, let me just mention to our Fort Wayne/Allen County people that the 2014 Lincoln Colloquium will be in Fort Wayne this year, at the ACPL, Saturday September 27.

    http://lincolncollection.org/media/2665 … ration.pdf

    Note that the event costs $35, and includes a very good meal amidst all the interesting speakers…and the day before – Friday September 26, Eric Foner will be here to deliver the annual Gerald McMurtry lecture – and that event is FREE and open to the public.

    I think I shall be in for both, the good Lord willin’ and the river don’t rise!

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  6. Dave said on August 27, 2014 at 11:32 am

    I read Neil Young’s autobiography, “Waging Heavy Peace”, this summer and he professes his love for his wife over and over, throughout the book. It’s a book that does a lot of jumping around, very much stream of consciousness. She’s his third wife and by far, the longest marriage.

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  7. beb said on August 27, 2014 at 12:53 pm

    I was shocked by the news that Neil Young was divorcing. You would think that after 36 years a man in his 60s would just settle for a separate lives and not go through all the bother of dividing property and such. Makes one wonder if there isn’t a little bimbette somewhere but even then it seems like a lot of trouble.

    Cornell West. He’s not part of the Left, he’s more of an ultra-extreme leftist. The Rick Santorum of Black people. Who cares what he thinks. Except the punditocracy who want to kneecap the president without appearing like the racist conservatives they are.

    I got caught in yesterday’s heavy rainfall. Blinding waves of water and then pools on the street 6-8 inches deep and hundred yards long. Not something you should drive a small car through. Eventually the wires in my engine got soaked and I had to sputter along at 5 mph to get home. Here’s hoping the car will run today.

    The monsoons Detroit have been hit with are amazing because in years past when heavy weather in the region was predicted it always tracked northeast over Toledo and never came north to Detroit. This year we’re getting the heavy weather and you’re not. Count your blessings!

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  8. Hattie said on August 27, 2014 at 1:08 pm

    I’m laughing about your yoga experiences,so like mine. I hate the woo woo stuff and luckily now have a very down to earth instructor.

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  9. Charlotte said on August 27, 2014 at 1:08 pm

    Maybe she’s leaving him? Or not. Peter Fonda is sort of persona-non-grata around here after divorcing Becky, who is the Nicest Person on the Planet, a couple of years ago. But we lucked out, she stuck around and he went off and married some young floozy. I’m only 5’1″ and I think even before the osteoporosis got bad, Becky Fonda was only about 4’11” — it’s always so weird for me to have a conversation with someone shorter than I am.

    And that poor little girl in Arizona. She’s going to have to live with that horror for the rest of her life because the adults were so irresponsible. Breaks my heart for her.

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  10. Connie said on August 27, 2014 at 1:16 pm

    My husband and daughter were floating down the Huron River on air mattresses and could see the storm coming yesterday. When the rain hit they had about 45 minutes to go on their two hour trip. As he said, at least we were already wet. I left work just as the heavy rain started gave some serious thought to pulling over until it lightened up.

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  11. Dave said on August 27, 2014 at 1:32 pm

    Yes, Beb, a lot of trouble. I agree completely, being a man in my sixties. Our daughter-in-law’s mother left her father nearly two years ago now, after a marriage of some 35 years. It’s completely wrecked him and it was her wanting her freedom. We (my wife and I) thought, why not just stay together and do what you want. I should say, to our knowledge, there was no abuse, no nasty stuff, she says as much, she just decided she didn’t want to be married anymore. Our daughter-in-law was devastated, I believe she is still. However, as is always said, only two people really know what goes on in a marriage.

    I saw enough destroyed marriages with co-workers to know I didn’t want one of those. One told me, after the infatuation wore off, he realized he’d traded one set of problems for another.

    My apologies to Deborah and Dexter and whoever else, I’ve been reading all of your remarks for quite some time and you’ve certainly exposed enough of your personal lives to give us some grasp of why things went as they did. As have my siblings, all of them married twice.

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  12. Dorothy said on August 27, 2014 at 1:42 pm

    When my husband and I were at the closing for our current home last November, there was a glitch and we had to sit about 20 minutes while waiting for paperwork to be faxed over. The guy running the show let out a sigh and told us about a closing he’d had earlier that day. An elderly couple married for close to 50 years – they were selling their house and she was divorcing him. She loudly said “He found out not long ago he has Alzheimers. I’m not sticking around for that. It’s his problem, not mine.” Mike and I were thunderstruck! Just when you think you’ve heard everything…that just killed me. I wanted to cry for the old guy and he wasn’t even in the room.

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  13. Basset said on August 27, 2014 at 2:11 pm

    Reminds me of a couple we ran into while doing dog rescue – they were giving up, throwing away actually, their aged basset hound. Had him since he was a pup but “he’s too old to play with the kids any more.”

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  14. Jolene said on August 27, 2014 at 2:16 pm

    Re the Cornel West piece, I was struck by the similarity of his complaints and some of the complaints of his right-leaning critics. The topics differ, but they are all mad because the president doesn’t “just lead” with regard to whatever issue they’re concerned about. They seem to forget little things like the separation of powers, until, of course, he does something unilaterally. Then it’s all about abuse of power.

    West and Tavis Smiley have done nothing but complain about what Obama hasn’t done for black people and/or poor people since he took office. I guess the ACA, changes in sentencing for drug crimes, and guaranteeing the right to sue for equal pay were all done for the 1%.

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  15. Jolene said on August 27, 2014 at 2:23 pm

    Boo hoo! My iPad is dying. The control button at the bottom of the screen has stopped working. Haven’t checked yet to see whether it’s fixable and, if so, how much fixing it would cost. Had heard that they were going to launch a new model soon and thought I might be able to wait until then and buy the second newest model after the price drops, but am not sure I can wait until then.

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  16. brian stouder said on August 27, 2014 at 2:30 pm

    Basset – sounds like shades of Steinbeck’s Of Mice and Men.

    Jolene – I’d do a $10 tracphone until after the new roll-out, and pocket the $$$$ you save.

    ‘Course, a $10 tracphone is all I ever do, so ymmv

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  17. Deborah said on August 27, 2014 at 2:37 pm

    My ex’s wife left her husband who had MS for my ex, and if Karma ain’t a bitch now she’s got it. Little Bird says her father complains about how his wife is too proud to use a wheelchair and makes him walk slowly with her. Karma.

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  18. LAMary said on August 27, 2014 at 3:12 pm

    Charlotte, wasn’t Becky previously married to Tom McGuane who sort of dumped her when they filming a movie of one of his books? I recall one of his books had the dedication, “for Beck.”

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  19. Jolene said on August 27, 2014 at 3:23 pm

    By the way, I happened to catch the Ken Burns documentary on the Central Park Five last night. Very much worth seeing if you have a chance. Will probably be shown again later in the week.

    Absolutely breathtaking that there could be a miscarriage of justice on such a scale. So many people had to deceive themselves and each other to make that case go forward.

    I wish I could remember the statement the prosecutor made in the statement exonerating the five men who were convicted, but the short version would be something like, “Nothing about the evidence presented in this case adds up.” Just amazing.

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  20. Sherri said on August 27, 2014 at 3:50 pm

    Stupid or sociopath? My vote is both.


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  21. MichaelG said on August 27, 2014 at 4:29 pm

    It appears that fire arms “instructor” had the little girl fire once on semi-automatic before setting the weapon on full automatic. Everybody knows automatic weapons have a tendency to climb up and to the left and the guy was standing in exactly the wrong place. What the film shows is a man acting in an unprofessional and stupid fashion. I’m sure a real firearms instructor would come up with a very lengthy list of things that were done incorrectly during that incident. The guy was an accident waiting to happen.

    My wife and I split up when I was in my sixties and after thirty some years. These things do happen. There was no hate and there were no arguments. We did not divorce because neither of us had any intention of getting married again and because, with a legal separation I could keep her insured for medical, teeth and eyes and because being married would save us money at tax time.

    These days we are getting along better than we have for years. We talk several times a week on the phone and get together at least once a week. She’s still a very beautiful woman. Me, not so much.

    I was appalled but not surprised by the incident recounted by Dorothy @#12. It’s funny. My wife always said she was going to get rid of me when I got old because she didn’t want to take care of some old sick guy. Turns out that when I got sick, she was the first one there.

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  22. alex said on August 27, 2014 at 5:00 pm

    …and because being married would save us money at tax time.

    Ssshhhhh. One of the last resorts of right-wingers railing against gay marriage, when none of their other arguments are taken seriously, is that allowing it would create an incentive for tax cheats.

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  23. brian stouder said on August 27, 2014 at 5:03 pm

    MichaelG – I’d say that’s an existential thread-win!

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  24. David C. said on August 27, 2014 at 6:01 pm

    I’ve heard light in the loafers like comments from the gun nuts at work. Oddly enough, I’m supposed to be the pussy (not that I’ve ever said word one about not owning guns and never wanting to (it’s amazing what they’ll say when they think you are one of them)) yet they say they don’t feel safe without being strapped and I don’t feel unsafe anywhere. Doesn’t quite add up in my eyes.

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  25. Charlotte said on August 27, 2014 at 6:13 pm

    LAMary — yes, Becky was married to Tom McGuane, and they have a son together. She and Tom split up during Rancho Mirage when Tom brought Margie Kidder home, pregnant. Funniest part is that Margie and Becky are great friends now …

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  26. Andrea said on August 27, 2014 at 6:47 pm

    Re: woman divorcing husband with Alzheimer’s…

    It’s easy to condemn that woman on the basis of what you heard, but who really knows what their marriage was like? Perhaps he was abusive, or cheated on her, or was an addict? It could have been a lifetime of suffering or catering to him and the idea that she’d spend her final years nursing someone who’d not been there for her in some essential way or who had caused her significant pain? I don’t know. It doesn’t sound nice, that’s for certain, but I imagine that there was a great deal more to the story than what you heard….. but you probably knew that already.

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  27. LAMary said on August 27, 2014 at 6:59 pm

    Someone I know is married to a man with Alzheimers. He gets very angry and violent. He wanders off. He accuses his wife of being unfaithful with everyone from the mailman to the young neighbor and smacks her around. He needs to be in a place where he can’t hurt her or himself, and if she divorced him I wouldn’t hold it against her.
    She knows he’s not doing it on purpose, but it’s still very frightening.

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  28. Sherri said on August 27, 2014 at 7:12 pm

    As the saying goes, nobody knows what goes on in a marriage but the two people in it. You’d think that someone with the money that Neil Young has could just live separate lives without the bother of a divorce (that seems to be former Google CEO Eric Schmidt’s solution), but who knows what prompted him to file for divorce.

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  29. Suzanne said on August 27, 2014 at 7:44 pm

    Who gives a 9 year old an UZI?? I can’t fathom it.

    I just hope and pray my husband doesn’t have old age problems because I know that I will be a horrible nurse and he’s always been a horrible patient. It simply won’t go well, I know.

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  30. alex said on August 27, 2014 at 7:45 pm

    Diane Arbus moment this evening without a camera: Six fat people on three scooters on the shoulder of the road riding into the sunset.

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  31. coozledad said on August 27, 2014 at 9:30 pm

    I have to agree with John Cole’s take on the instructor. It’s not so much a horror as a sick joke.

    When I was of model building age, I built models of planes and tanks that carried cannon and anti personnel weapons. It was an abstraction, and I could find these things beautiful in their raw simplicity.

    In an utterly fucking evil way.

    Once again, we get a classic demonstration of the links between sexual insecurity, stupidity, and evil. This poor fucker is just the latest parable for the Iraq debacle.

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  32. brian stouder said on August 27, 2014 at 11:12 pm

    I agree about the ‘only two people’ axiom, with regard to what goes on in a marriage. Nonetheless, my bet is that Niel has traded in for a newer soul mate, who wishes to be married to him.

    Aside from that, I sort of just assume I’ll die before Pam does. Stouder men don’t tend to be particularly long-lived (I’m already older than my dad lived to be, and I’m within a few years of his dad’s and his brother’s lifespan) – and in any case, Pam is 9 years younger than me.

    If one could pick (and indeed, one cannot), I’d like to see the milestones of the young folk’s lives, and then if I must checkout – it would be good if Pam was still young enough to want to marry someone else

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  33. Jerry said on August 28, 2014 at 12:12 am

    47 years and counting here. Can’t imagine life apart now.

    I’ve already lived 12 years longer than my father so I hope I take after my mother who lasted until she was 94 – although the last few years were a trial for her and her children. I’ve told our son in the medical profession that I expect to be helped if I seem to be outstaying my welcome!

    Brian’s comment about seeing the young folks milestones resonates as my brother died a month ago while desperately hoping to see his latest grandchild born in October – not to be I’m afraid.

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  34. Dexter said on August 28, 2014 at 12:55 am

    My ex’s mom was married eight times, but she did find happiness with her last man.
    The happiest, hippest, coolest, smartest, funniest married couple I know are two gents who married last summer. One man is 57 and the other 51, and they define “two peas in a pod”.

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  35. Dorothy said on August 28, 2014 at 9:08 am

    Yes certainly, Andrea, that is exactly what I thought. But it’s the shock of hearing someone saying that, the immediate perception being that she’s a cold-hearted bitch and yadda yadda yadda. Just because my marriage is not like that doesn’t mean I can’t imagine or visualize someone else having a simply awful one. You hear ‘married for almost 50 years’ and this picture in your head creates a white-haired lady wearing pearls and elastic waist pants, spewing anger and hatred towards her poor disease-ridden husband. But there are infinite possibilities of what kind of life/marriage they have. It’s sad no matter how you look at it.

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  36. Laurie said on August 28, 2014 at 4:33 pm

    Dave, I took Neil’s book out from the library (glad I didn’t shell out for it) and gave up after a few chapters. One of the laziest, most disorganized “books” [sic] I’ve ever encountered plus endless shilling for his upcoming digital music download service/music player. May also reflect the state of editing in this country. I do recall that at the time of publication Neil was trying to get sober after being continuously stoned his entire adult life. Who knows, but sometimes relationships don’t survive one of them getting sober.

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  37. Basset said on August 28, 2014 at 5:32 pm

    Agree with that, Laurie – got it used and couldn’t finish it, rambling tales of getting agoraphobic in Costco are not particularly enlightening or interesting. Maybe he was trying for childlike innocence, I dunno.

    Always figured that despite his enormous talent he couldn’t be wrapped all that tightly and this seems to prove it. Cool hat on the cover, though.

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  38. Andrea said on August 28, 2014 at 10:09 pm

    Dorothy, thanks for the note. My husband and I have been married 21 years so far and for reasons I won’t get into here, there have been several years in which my marriage has caused me considerable pain. I once thought that I made a vow for forever but now I know that’s not necessarily so. Things are better, now, but I have often thought about what the future holds and whether I would be up for nursing a person who had treated me so poorly and caused me to suffer so much. I don’t know what the answer is but neither can I say “I would never do that.”

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