Scant. Just scant.

The thing is, it’s funny because every word is true:

FORT WAYNE, IN—Promising to steer them away from the usual tourist traps and show them the sights of his hometown through the eyes of a native, local man Martin Greenbaum pledged Monday to treat his visiting friends to the real Fort Wayne experience, sources said.

And yeah, it’s the Onion. But the Onion is genius.

I was actually thinking about Fort Wayne today, as it was Crazy Downtown Day in Detroit. The Tigers played at 4, followed by the Lions home opener/Monday Night Football right after. All through the stadium neighborhood, radio stations had set up remote broadcasts. There was food everywhere, bands — the whole shot. It made me happy, once again, to be here, all the Detroit jokes in the world be damned. I was meant to live in a big city. People like me don’t reach critical mass in tank towns. I stayed in the Fort 20 years and can’t say it wasn’t worth it — it absolutely was — but I’m glad I’m somewhere else now. Chapters, pages, etc.

So. Some of you guys know that I went to college with Peter King, the sportswriter. One of the best PK insults ever was in Deadspin today — “covers the league from the centermost pleat on Roger Goodell’s khakis” — but it sounds like he really stepped in it on this Ray Rice business.

Off to contemplate more Book. Happy Tuesday.

Posted at 12:30 am in Current events, Detroit life |

54 responses to “Scant. Just scant.”

  1. Sherri said on September 9, 2014 at 2:16 am

    Peter King was played, and he wasn’t the only one. The Ravens were evidently telling reporters (off the record) at the NFL combine that they had information that the incident wasn’t as bad as it looked from the original video. Multiple reporters were at the very least led to believe that the NFL had access to all the information prosecutors had. And now, evidently TMZ is saying that their sources from the casino said that people from the NFL came to look at the videos, and saw the elevator video leaked today.

    Not that anyone should have needed the elevator video to figure out what happened. The first video was bad enough. Roger Goodell should resign; he’s not even competent enough to be the owners’ lackey.

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  2. Jolene said on September 9, 2014 at 3:11 am

    Another story of the subversion of justice, similar to the Central Park Five case in that the defendants wee not really competent to cooperate in their defense and the prosecutor was not particularly concerned about certain procedural niceties. These stories are horrifying; it’s hard to imagine anything worse than being imprisoned for years and years for crimes you didn’t commit. And it seems there are never any consequences to anyone in officialdom for these injustices.

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  3. Dexter said on September 9, 2014 at 3:17 am

    I do not know who authored this, but I have used it from time to time since I left Fort Wayne over forty years ago, “Fort Wayne has all the disadvantages of a large city with none of the advantages.” That was in the days of horrible traffic jams on “the bypass”, for one disadvantage. Then there was a rather large area where pretty scary crime was occurring regularly.
    The fact that left me wishing I lived in a major metropolis was the lack of pro sports. In my mind, a town had to have a major sports team or two root for. The Fort Wayne Zollner Pistons of the NBA left for Detroit when I was a boy and the Komets were fun, but that’s all we had. Concert-wise, we had venues; the Coliseum, Scottish-Rite Auditorium, Embassy Theater filled that gap. We had plenty of bars and restaurants; generally, shopping was fine.
    However, I never had one of those moments that etch themselves into your mind, never had a moment in Fort Wayne that made me feel that I was right there, that exact point in time, where I was absolutely sure I would not want to be anywhere else than right where I was, right then.
    I am a baseball religionist, I guess anyway, one of those people whose love for the game transcends fandom, and there’s no getting around it. Few understand it, but it’s real. One day when I was a teenager and when Wrigley Field’s gates opened at 10:00 AM for a 1:15 game, and we kids would be there and run down to the railings to watch batting practice and try to grab a foul ball, I had that moment. I turned to my buddy , there in the warm sunshine, major league baseball right in front of me, and I said as much to him,”I would not want to be anywhere else in the world right now”, and that’s why I should be a city-dweller, and that explains why I spent a lot of money driving to cities and drinking it all in every chance I had. My first trip to the top of The Empire State Building, my first Freedom Trail walk in Boston, seeing Rainbow Row and The Battery in Charleston, exploring San Francisco on foot, in my car, on cable cars, buses…all that was fantastic. Many large cities left me hating them, too: San Antonio, Columbus, Ohio come to mind, but when I get nostalgic for what never was, I know I would have a blast growing up in Brooklyn, New York, or Chicago.

    Now I will opine: From the onslaught of comments today, all from people on the teevee screaming “listen to me cuz I have the truth!” , I simply choose to believe that oh hell yes the NFL brass had likely seen the Ray Rice Tyson-like left that floored the fiancee, and chose to hope the video would never go public. Well, Ray Rice legion-of-fans, remember the Vick…this remains a country of second chances. Ray Rice will probably come back into the NFL. As far as a prosecutor taking this into court, we just shall wait and see.

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  4. Jolene said on September 9, 2014 at 3:26 am

    Dexter, Ray Rice has already been adjudicated. He pleaded not guilty to a third-degree assault charge and, as a first offender, was admitted to a pre-trial intervention program. Of course, many people are now asking whether he should have been treated so leniently, but, presumably, he can’t be prosecuted again.

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  5. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on September 9, 2014 at 7:03 am


    Cupertino, CA – In advance of today’s much anticipated product rollout by Tim Cook, Apple’s CEO, insider sources reveal that the item to be announced with much consumer excitement and no little investor interest is:

    The iSponge.

    Apple contacts tell us that the iSponge will completely transform the kitchen experience for millions. It will be able to both absorb spills and debris on countertops and in the sink, and also vast amounts of data in a newly designed organic and flexible “chip matrix” grown in vats of sea water.

    The iSponge will recharge from sitting in Apple’s proprietary mix of salt and other minerals (sold in small envelopes in Apple Stores or online) mixed with tap water, so no plugs are needed. It wirelessly will connect with your other Apple devices to co-ordinate your kitchen appliances, and also update your iPhone on which surfaces need cleaning in the vicinity. The iSponge will also interface with Siri to explain recipes to you as you work.

    iSponges will come in 5 inch, 5.5 inch, and 7 inch models; pricing information is not yet available.

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  6. coozledad said on September 9, 2014 at 7:20 am

    Jolene: Britt’s behavior is the sort of crap voters around here can’t get enough of. There are still enough vestiges of the old power structure to permit sociopaths access to prosecutorial work. The racism and disregard for civil liberties are a smokescreen for Britt’s real job, which was fellating whoever told him to run for office, gave him the money to do it, and had him report to them on a daily basis. That’s the way shit has been done down here since the planters and the Klan rolled back Reconstruction.

    I’ve talked to candidates down here who told me that in the absence of major financial intervention by the state or national Democratic party, the pathway to candidacy was being selected by one of the two or three old racists who run this town, to run against a Republican who was already munching their ass faithfully. They want to make sure certain conditions are met.

    Small donations and increased party activism are kicking them in the balls though. That, and old age, plus the fact that they can’t squeeze enough money out of buildings and other infrastructure they’ve allowed to rot out of sheer stupid greed and the feudal resistance to change.

    Anytime someone starts mythologizing the South, or human cankers like Lee or Jackson, tell them to look at the old pants shitter who runs their town, or his bigot enforcers. That’s what those people were. Not a damn thing more.

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  7. Jeff Borden said on September 9, 2014 at 7:54 am

    The NFL has tolerated egregious behavior for so long that it’s moral compass spins like a whirligig. I’ve lost count of how many felons play a game that is already notable for its violence. Josh Gordon of the Browns has been suspended for a year for testing positive for smoking pot, apparently a common occurrence in a league where huge men bash into each other at full tilt with all the attendant aches, pains and sprains that entails. But Ray Rice was getting just two games for knocking a woman unconscious? And since this incident occurred in a casino, the league had to know there were video cameras EVERYWHERE.

    The whole thing stinks. I agree with those calling for Roger Goodell’s resignation. He has to go.

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  8. alex said on September 9, 2014 at 8:25 am

    Fort Wayne used to have one of the advantages of a big city when it had an outstanding local columnist whose work was worth reading every day. Now we’re stuck with this shit. Even the Onion couldn’t parody this nutsack on any given day.

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  9. Linda said on September 9, 2014 at 8:33 am

    Deadpan wondered who would have the most idiotic reaction to the beating video, but Fox and Friends wins hands down. They watched a woman get beat unconscious, and cracked jokes. Like stone idiots. They didn’t even have the hope that the public wouldn’t find out, like the NFL had–they just made fools of themselves in front of God and everybody.

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  10. coozledad said on September 9, 2014 at 8:40 am

    That Leninger piece completely ignores the fundies calling for a new Charles Martel, or Phil Robertson’s “convert or kill” advocacy. Or this:

    I happen to believe fundies of every neolithic stripe would make excellent forced labor on goddamn Mars. Just strap their asses to a rocket bus and shoot them up there. God will take care of them.

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  11. Jeff Borden said on September 9, 2014 at 8:40 am


    I read about those comments. It’s hard to imagine the callousness, the heartlessness, the outright stupidity on display by the man who said this. And, according to what I read, a female co-host giggled her little head off when he said it.

    Fox is an open sewer. Survey after survey finds their viewers know less than those who watch no TV news at all. This should surprise exactly no one.

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  12. Julie Robinson said on September 9, 2014 at 9:18 am

    And I am at my relatives in Iowa, where Fox rules and WiFi doesn’t exist. Open sewer describes the vitriol well. I have to keep excusing myself from the room or I might just explode.

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  13. brian stouder said on September 9, 2014 at 10:00 am

    Julie, no fun! Maybe a well-timed guffaw, and then an exit (to take a walk) while still chuckling as you amble away will convey the message in a familial way.

    Aside from that, I attended the school board meeting – for Fort Wayne’s genuinely marvelous school system – last evening, and found it as interesting as ever. It was a light agenda, and before the meeting began I had the opportunity to gab with the superintendent (Dr Robinson) about the new school year and current events*, which is always a very nice bonus for going downtown on a Monday evening.

    I don’t like doing the “public comment” thing, although once or twice a year I’ll do it, which is always terrifying. (Rule Number One is: don’t appear to be a nut!)
    I DID have an article in my pocket, about a Fort Wayne Community Schools bus driver who saved a lost three year old, thanks to being attentive to the traffic on his radio a few days ago (see link below), but I was sure that someone up there would comment about that…and then no one did. (really, I should have mentioned it to Dr Robinson, but then again, she’d have probably told me to comment on it myself!) After the meeting ended, one of the board members came over to speak with a person near where I was, and I caught his eye and mentioned the school bus thing, and he asked if he could have the article, which I immediately gave to him. It was just so very nice to read an article about a public employee who isn’t a firefighter or a cop, who did a wonderful thing; and especially nice that it was an FWCS person, y’know?

    *Our Superintendent of Public Education (who won more votes state-wide and the dysfunctional state school board held a meeting in Fort Wayne last week (the first I heard of it was when I read a report in the newspaper a day afterward), and that is a hairy-dog story that just won’t quit (no matter how much one wishes it WOULD!)

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  14. brian stouder said on September 9, 2014 at 10:45 am

    and btw, much as I agree that Fox News is an open sewer, CNN is increasingly like (at best) an over-full porta-potty

    I’m betting they strike their current header (no violent pun intended), which is:

    Ray Rice’s wife slams his punishment for violence against her

    (granted, she should probably not post on social media for awhile. She seems to be the classic ‘battered woman’, taking blame for her assault)

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  15. Sue said on September 9, 2014 at 11:02 am

    But why would the NFL even have needed to see the tape? After all, they had the girlfriend/wife’s own version of the events, direct from the source. Wasn’t that enough?
    Oh, sure, her version was provided in a meeting where she was sitting next to the man who knocked her cold, surrounded by the people who had a vested interest in keeping that man employed. But I’m sure everyone was very nice and she didn’t feel pressured at all.
    There are so many layers of horribleness in this it’s amazing anyone is willing to show his face.

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  16. Jeff Borden said on September 9, 2014 at 11:07 am

    There was video of him dragging her unconscious body from the elevator. The new tape shows him delivering a left hook to her temple, which knocks her backward, and she strikes her head hard on the hand-railing of the elevator. It’s almost like she absorbed two punches.

    But the first tape should’ve been more than enough to send Ray Rice to jail instead of a pathetic, two-game suspension from a weak-kneed commissioner looking to protect the golden goose.

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  17. Sherri said on September 9, 2014 at 11:38 am

    If you’re very creative, and you’re very determined, I suppose it’s remotely possible to come up with a scenario inside the elevator that doesn’t involve Ray Rice cold-cocking his girlfriend. But it takes an almost conscious choice to disregard the clear evidence of the first video, which shows the callous way Rice treated her, showing no concern for her, even if you’re willing to make up a story in which Rice is not directly responsible for knocking her unconscious. There are currently two players in the league playing while in various stages of having domestic violence arrests adjudicated. One has already been convicted even, but is appealing his conviction.

    This is not a new problem for the NFL, this is just the first time we’ve had visuals of the problem. But hey, in less than a month, the NFL will bedeck itself in pink to show how much it cares about women by tossing a few pennies towards breast cancer.

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  18. Alan Stamm said on September 9, 2014 at 11:59 am

    “I didn’t do my job the right way. I will attempt to earn back your trust and the trust of others and I hope that at some point in the future you will give us another shot. . . . I let you down.”
    — Peter King reply to reader comments this morning

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  19. Sherri said on September 9, 2014 at 12:04 pm

    And on Nancy’s college buddy Peter King: I read King regularly. I read King precisely because he covers the league from the center pleat of Roger Goodell’s khakis; in other words, I read him to know what the NFL is thinking. I don’t expect a critical voice from him, or in general from SI, ESPN, Fox Sports, NBC Sports, or CBS Sports, though there are a few exceptions. They’re all too dependent on NFL access and/or revenue. Peter King is the Cokie Roberts of the NFL: the voice of the establishment.

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  20. brian stouder said on September 9, 2014 at 12:04 pm

    Sherri for thread win!

    The whole thing (NFL*/Big TimeAmerican Sports/anything goes until it doesn’t) is cartoonish, in its exaggerated – indeed elephantine – sense of cultural supremacy and intrinsic infallibility.

    And indeed, even if, one fine day, professional football’s golden goose dies, it will only be replaced by another exaggerated, elephantine circus.

    *Or NASCAR, for that matter

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  21. beb said on September 9, 2014 at 12:55 pm

    I don’t get the outrage. It’s like playing with pitbulls, you know that eventually you;re going to get savaged.

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  22. Dexter said on September 9, 2014 at 1:36 pm

    beb, it’s like my friend in Connecticut who is always going on about his love for snakes…even the Albino Monocled Cobra that terrorized Thousand Oaks last week: “Let him live!” (The capturers did get ‘im alive). I don’t believe it’s racist to compare to the old fable-set-to-song, best done by Al Wilson, because there are some crazy white boys in the NFL as well.

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  23. Sherri said on September 9, 2014 at 2:44 pm

    Beb, my outrage is primarily with Roger Goodell, who made $44 million last year as NFL commissioner. It’s with Steve Bisciotti, the owner of the Ravens, who didn’t have the courage to face the media yesterday, instead letting his coach take the heat. Bisciotti was right out in front unveiling a statue of Ray Lewis over the weekend, though. The same Ray Lewis who was charged with murder in 2000, before taking a plea deal to plead guilty to obstruction of justice and testify against his compatriots, who were acquitted. It’s with Ozzie Newsome, the GM, and John Harbaugh, the coach, who went out of their way to defend Rice and tell everybody what a good guy he was.

    I’m never surprised, though I’m saddened, when someone whose job relies on violence uses violence outside that job. I will get outraged when grown men, particularly rich men who want public money to build their stadiums, don’t show enough decency to face the consequences of profiting off a violent sport.

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  24. brian stouder said on September 9, 2014 at 3:16 pm

    Double Thread Win!!

    Really, the tax-payer bankrolled construction of multi-tens-of-millions of dollars for new palaces for these “privately owned” sports franchises, even when their existing palaces are still plenty good enough, is nothing less than obscene.

    ‘You didn’t build that’, indeed

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  25. Suzanne said on September 9, 2014 at 4:21 pm

    ‘You didn’t build that’, indeed
    Yes, Brian, this. Doesn’t take a rocket scientist or a brain surgeon to dissect that old argument, but it is amazing how many people can’t. I think you should get the win!

    Leininger. One main reason we don’t and never will subscribe to the News-Sentinel. I’ve read a few of his columns online but don’t think I’ve ever made it through one in its entirety.

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  26. Jolene said on September 9, 2014 at 5:00 pm

    Cooz @ #6: You may be entirely right about the characters in your environs, but that doesn’t explain how pretty much the same thing happened to the Central Park Five in Manhattan.

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  27. MichaelG said on September 9, 2014 at 6:16 pm

    Agreed, Jeff B. I too found it impossible to get over the contrast between the guy who got a whole year’s suspension after having tested positive for cannabis and the two game suspension for the guy who beat a woman into unconsciousness.

    Thing about the elevator video is that it doesn’t change or add to the story in any fashion at all. It was known all along that there was an argument and that Rice knocked out Ms. Palmer in the elevator and was taped dragging her insensate body out of the thing. All the newly released elevator tape does is provide a graphic portrayal of a, by now, well known event. And now Roger the Dodger is suddenly appalled, appalled I say, about the KO. That gets me. Why now all of a sudden?

    Also did anybody note the follow up? Watch the way Rice drags her half way out of the elevator car and drops her like a sack of shit. He kicks her in the leg, drags his foot over her rear, makes no attempt to cover her exposed legs and rear. Just look at the second half of the video. Rice sure doesn’t look like a guy in love with his female companion.

    I’m saddened by Ms. Rice’s comments. I wonder how much support she’s gotten from friends and family. By the way, was she pregnant?

    I hate the “Anybody can make a mistake. I said I’m sorry, why are you still bugging me?” act.

    And yes, Goodell probably should go but I don’t think he’s any different than any other NFL execs.

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  28. Deborah said on September 9, 2014 at 7:20 pm

    The Rice video was appalling. Hard to believe how insensitive the guy was about his unconscious girlfriend. And hard to believe the woman still married him after that and is standing up for him to this day. Amazing.

    We took my husband to the airport and he’s on his way back to Chicago but his flight has been delayed because of storming. It’s been nice having him here again. He’ll be back in early October and then I go back with him to Chicago until Thanksgiving.

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  29. Sherri said on September 9, 2014 at 8:21 pm

    A good summary of the Rice domestic violence and the NFL response:

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  30. Sherri said on September 9, 2014 at 8:48 pm

    And Charles Pierce reminds us that football players aren’t the only ones who knock their wives around:

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  31. brian stouder said on September 9, 2014 at 9:39 pm

    Video is becoming too important, all around. Rice was in the clear, but for the video. So as horrible as he is, one must also ponder how many terrible people will skate, simply because there’s no video to watch.

    And, since Nancy mentioned Fort Wayne in the original post, here’s the worst video of the day, from the Fort. Count the gun shots…and ponder how set-up the whole operation was:

    This occurred within about 6 miles of where we live.

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  32. MarkH said on September 10, 2014 at 12:05 am

    Wrong, MichaelG.

    Why are you giving Goodell any credit for even APPEARING to be ‘appalled’. Did you see his comments to a CBS reporter this afternoon? His-non answer to the one question he was asked about the latest video was such a casual, lackadaisical and offensive dodge, it betrayed everything about how he doesn’t care. Offensive in the extreme. CBS also betrayed the fact that they have BILLIONS on the line here with their NFL contract. One wrong move and it’s all in jeopardy if the Rice scandal shows any sign of blowing over. They play hardball with the NFL at their financial peril. I am convinced that the reporter was given orders to ask the obvious question, but ask it only once. And no matter what Goodell says, even if he starts reciting from the Gettysburg Address, let his answer fall flat and don’t follow up. “There. We did our job”. Ed Murrow is so proud right now.

    The only commandment at the NFL: Thou Shalt Not Interrupt Thy Income Stream.

    It’s shameful that everyone is on board this whoretrain, Peter King included. Although he appears to have come to his senses, too bad it took readers’ comments to restore basic skepticism.

    And Deborah, stop being amazed. Janay Rice is clearly on board the train, too. She is beyond victimhood here. I wouldn’t be surprised if Rice pulled in NFL hacks to help him explain the facts if life to her, get out there and say whatever is necessary to reduce the heat so the money keeps flowing.

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  33. MichaelG said on September 10, 2014 at 1:03 am

    Take a deep breath, MarkH. I wasn’t wrong, I was being sarcastic. Sorry you didn’t pick that up. One shouldn’t have to explain one’s jokes or one’s sarcasm. One expects others to get it. Sorry if I missed the boat but the sarcasm seemed obvious to me. And no, I didn’t see this afternoon’s presser.

    What do you think, MarkH of Rice’s behavior on the video after knocking Janay out?

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  34. MarkH said on September 10, 2014 at 5:31 am

    No, I didn’t see the sarcasm, MichaelG, because I’ve seen his taped comments, and I didn’t see any even feigned sense of the appalled in anything Goodell said. I thought at best, you saw something I didn’t, perhaps. Apart from being a little slow on the uptake, my cynicism is at full throttle on all things NFL right now, something I’m not quite used to, if you’ll allow me. Ray Rice himself? Appalling, start to finish, on that tape and beyond. I don’t believe his act of contrition, either, and I really don’t know what to make of the Mrs.’ position on all this, blaming the PRESS?. Lately here, we have made much of the fact that only the participants know what really goes on in a marriage. Except with Mr. and Mrs. Rice we have visual evidence of their relationship. Beyond that, stories are now coming out indicating a good number of cases of adjudicated spousal abuse by players, some swept under the rug by the NFL. Oh, yes, they now have policy to deal with this, but only after it was clear not just what Rice did, but how they blew their disposition of it.

    Whatever. The NFL juggernaut will likely roll on. And, OK, I’ll take that deep breath now, MichaelG, and go back to believing in the Broncos one more season.

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  35. Jolene said on September 10, 2014 at 7:20 am

    It’s hardly surprising that there are other cases of domestic violence in the NFL. After all, there are just over 2000 players in the league. In the past few days, I’ve heard that one out of three or four American women will experience at least one incident of domestic violence. If that rate is correct, we’d expect that several hundred current players had, in some way, hurt their partners.

    Something I didn’t know: Women between the ages of 18 and 24 are more likely to experience violence from an intimate partner than women of any other age group. Makes sense I guess, as that is, for many people, a turbulent period of life with lots of the jealousy and break-ups that seem to give rise to violence. Also when men are the most hot-headed, least in control of their emotions.

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  36. Jolene said on September 10, 2014 at 7:31 am

    Something else worth knowing: Rates of domestic violence have declined dramatically over the past twenty years. At the link below, there’s a brief summary of statistics from the Department of Justice, which is mostly consistent with what I said above based on what I’d heard in news reports. Also noteworthy, if not surprising, unmarried women with children are more likely to be victimized than married women with children or single women with no children.

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  37. beb said on September 10, 2014 at 8:20 am

    One of the most, if not *The* most jaw-dropping moment in my life was when a truck driver at the place where I worked mentioned that he was celebrating his anniversary. It may have been his 25th, it may have been longer. At the time it was about as long as I had been alive. It must have been a good marriage, he declared, because he’d never had to hit his wife… Forty years later I still can’t comprehend that kind of thinking.

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  38. Grant Shipley said on September 10, 2014 at 9:27 am

    Beb: Remember The Honeymooners, with Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden? When his wife frustrated him, he would threaten “One of these days… POW!!! Right in the kisser!” Or: ” BANG, ZOOM! Straight to the moon!” (threatening to hit her so hard she would be sent to the moon). This was funny(?) It was 1951-1956 or so. The show was quite popular, so the marital dynamic of threatening bodily injury was apparently acceptable back then.

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  39. Sue said on September 10, 2014 at 10:48 am

    My daughter works in a women’s shelter. They are not even allowed to verify to the police if a woman is staying there. Think about that, and remember that only about one generation ago things started to turn around in society to give women safe options when they were being abused.
    A couple of statistics, at least in my area: it usually takes 6 attempts before a woman is physically, mentally and financially able to break free from her abuser. And often (I believe I’ve mentioned this here before), the only thing holding a woman back from final freedom is about $500. They can afford an apartment but can’t afford the security deposit, can afford to make payments on a crap car but can’t come up with the down payment. 500 freaking bucks.
    If you’re outraged about this, send a check to your local women’s shelter. Believe me, they can use it.

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  40. alex said on September 10, 2014 at 11:45 am

    What was funny about Ralph Kramden’s threats was that they were so obviously empty and made him look all the more impotent. Other than crime shows, I can’t remember a whole lot of television where violence against women was normalized by example.

    The film “The Color Purple” comes to mind as one of the few efforts ever to address the issue head-on. At the time it invited quite a backlash over its unflattering depictions of male behavior.

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  41. Sherri said on September 10, 2014 at 12:06 pm

    Sue, if you could ask your daughter a question: it seems like in many cases, if not most, when charges are actually filed for domestic abuse, the abuser gets a diversion program of some sort – counseling, anger management classes, etc. Is that an effective way of dealing with the problem? Would stronger legal remedies from the start help, or just make it less likely that the abused would seek legal help?

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  42. Sherri said on September 10, 2014 at 12:44 pm

    Every time I read this quote on Roger Goodell’s performance from Robert Kraft, the owner of the New England Patriots and one of the most influential owners in the NFL, I can’t help but think “Heckuva job, Brownie.”

    “The way he’s handled this situation himself, coming out with the mea culpa in his statement…and setting a very clear policy how we conduct ourselves in the NFL, I thought was excellent,” Mr. Kraft said.

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  43. Heather said on September 10, 2014 at 1:14 pm

    That guy’s poor wife. I’ve never been physically abused by a boyfriend, but I struggled with low self-esteem in relationships for a long time, and I can definitely understand why she would not only stay with him but marry him. These women deserve sympathy and help. Unfortunately the help only really works when they decide they want it.

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  44. jcburns said on September 10, 2014 at 2:09 pm

    What was funny about Ralph Kramden’s threats were…well, nothing really. That part of the show creeped me out as a child and as an adult.

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  45. brian stouder said on September 10, 2014 at 2:16 pm

    I remember getting “swats” in school – as late as 6th grade* – with a wooden board.

    One whack was indescribably painful, not to mention the extreme embarrassment of the whole thing.

    Looking at it today, if one of my kids came home and said that their teacher did that to them, I think I’d become apoplectic.

    And to bring this comment into line with the subject matter, the teacher(s) who did this didn’t lose my respect or become enemies to me.

    I’d bought-in to the idea that whatever I did earned the violence and pain and embarrassment that I received.

    I betcha the thinking of an abused spouse is something a little like that

    *circa 1973

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  46. Connie said on September 10, 2014 at 2:21 pm

    Brian, I am quite sure that is still legal in Indiana schools.

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  47. Connie said on September 10, 2014 at 2:22 pm

    At least when this was written in 2009:

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  48. alex said on September 10, 2014 at 2:22 pm

    We have a very good local prosecuting attorney who educated our law enforcement officials about domestic abuse and helped implement new practices. Gone are the days when victims could waffle on pressing charges or take back an abuser after an arrest. A man who hits a woman is charged with assault regardless of whether she wants to press charges, and the charges get more serious if the offense occurs in front of children or involves acts of strangulation. A no contact order bars either one of the parties from contacting the other, and a victim who takes back an abuser without the order lifted faces jail time. Both parties are then directed to the appropriate community resources and have to meet certain obligations for the no contact order to be lifted. In the past, the police were dealing over and over again with the same households, but that has largely changed thanks to this commonsense approach.

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  49. brian stouder said on September 10, 2014 at 2:33 pm

    Connie – I think…in fact I’d betcha that FWCS doesn’t do that anymore, as a matter of policy. Here’s their book –

    and a quick “control f” turned up nothing.

    But in any case – APOPLECTIC is what I’d be – well and truly – if this occurred to (or in front of) one of my kids, at one of my schools.

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  50. Suzanne said on September 10, 2014 at 4:40 pm

    A good friend of mine told me that her ex-husband’s father hit his wife with some regularity. I was shocked. They were pillars of the community, she was the absolute definition of a lady, and they seemed to have a life that I could only dream about. I guess you just never know…

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  51. brian stouder said on September 10, 2014 at 4:42 pm

    Unless they go to Vegas and hit a casino before he hits her – and then there’s video tape

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  52. Sherri said on September 10, 2014 at 5:05 pm

    Maybe this will send Goodell to the unemployment line along with Rice:

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  53. Deborah said on September 10, 2014 at 5:16 pm

    When I was newly married to my ex (I was 21) he got mad at me for some reason and threw a full can of beer at me that hit me in the leg and left a pretty bad bruise. A few months later in a fit of anger he threw a pair of electric scissors at me (I used to sew a lot) they missed but hit a favorite antique and broke it. At that time I told him if he ever did anything like that again I would bring charges. He never hit me but he would ball up his fist and make menacing gestures when he got mad, which was often. He had a lot of anger and you never knew what would set him off. I’m so glad I got out of that situation, but it took me 15 years before I came to my senses.

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  54. basset said on September 10, 2014 at 9:14 pm

    So does this Rice creature’s wife not have any brothers or male relatives? If I had a sister and that happened to her I would probably be the one locked up before it was over.

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