Jesus is just all right.

Let’s close out the week with a few snickers, shall we, and I’m not talking about the leftover Halloween candy. Julie Robinson sent along pix earlier this week, of decor in a Seventh Day Adventist Hospital in Florida. I assume they’re AI. They look like it, anyway. In one of my earliest art-history lessons, at the Columbus Museum of Art on some school field trip, the teacher said every culture makes art of Jesus in their own image. I guess Seventh Day Adventists are all keyboard players in ’70s rock bands:

Here he is healing a crippled woman, who cannot seem to look him in the eye.

But this! This is my favorite, as I’ve seen the pose on every hairdresser who turns the chair around and gives you the big reveal in the mirror:

“Didn’t I tell you? Didn’t I tell you a shorter look would frame your face better?”

OK, then. Happy retirement to Alex, and I leave you with a great column about Bob Knight, by my friend Dave Jones, with whom I was partying just a few days back. I think many of you will like it.

Posted at 9:32 pm in Current events, Same ol' same ol' |

38 responses to “Jesus is just all right.”

  1. Jeff said on November 2, 2023 at 10:18 pm

    A great breakdown of the concept “every culture makes Jesus in their own image”:

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  2. Julie Robinson said on November 2, 2023 at 10:21 pm

    No wonder, when he’s shtupping her from behind. Everyone I’ve showed it to thinks so.

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  3. Jeff said on November 2, 2023 at 10:25 pm

    That is John Corbett, right?

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  4. FDChief said on November 3, 2023 at 1:02 am

    I can’t remember where I read it – I want to say it was Fred Clarke over at Slactivist – but he talks about a 5th Century CE mural in Rome that shows a handsome, athletic young man in the dress uniform of a Roman soldier. He is trampling some sort of beast and is holding not a weapon but a cross…because it’s The Christ.

    I mean…think of how in three or four hundred years the guy’s whole schtick went from being the religion of slaves to the religion of slaveowners and ask yourself how that happens.

    So, yeah. Even within ten generations there was no “Christ”. There was and is the Christ in the minds and hearts of those who professed Him…which as often as not had very little to do with the dude in the books or what he is supposed to have said and done.

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  5. ROGirl said on November 3, 2023 at 5:51 am

    This is one of my favorites from the first art history class I took in college.

    The Isenheim Altarpiece was painted for a monastery with a hospital for skin diseases. The crucifixion depicts Jesus with sores all over his body. When the panels are opened on holy days the resurrection depicts a golden, glowing, triumphant smooth-skinned Christ.

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  6. Dexter Friend said on November 3, 2023 at 5:57 am

    My neighbor’s daughter was commissioned to paint a mural of Jesus Christ inside the church, on a wall. She had free artist’s choice. She painted Him as a small very brown man , obviously not a Roman-like figure. I loved it.
    Now we were shown Abu-Ghraib like video of Israeli soldiers hog-tying Palestinians and kicking the shit out of them, the Palestinians blindfolded and gagged and urinated upon. It’s on NBC if you don’t believe me, and the IDF acknowledges it all. No apology that I heard.
    For the 100the time, I am not anti-Semitic nor specifically anti-Jewish people…October 7th was a day of unspeakable horror. I am however now and for years very much anti-Netanyahu, who is trying to destroy Israeli democracy and himself become a king of sorts.
    Let’s all remember Palestinians are Semitic people.
    How were 40 breaches of “The Fence” breached with zero security responses? It seems Netanyahu allowed it so he could gin up his IDF and destroy all of Gaza and parts of The West Bank. These videos of dead children in Gaza are horrifying. So Hamas must be destroyed, but like this?Killing civilians by the thousands like W. Bush did with “Shock and Awe” all those years ago?

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  7. Jim said on November 3, 2023 at 6:28 am

    Considering that Jebus never existed, and if he had, he would be brown skinned having been born out East ……………..

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  8. Mark P said on November 3, 2023 at 9:36 am

    Surely as bad as all the Jesus as a soap opera hippie images are the Jesus songs and imaginings. “Oh, Jesus, I just love you love you love you!” They sound like a young teen’s first stirrings of lust. And the idea that he’s got your back and has the answers to all your problems. Can’t figure out that math homework problem? Let Jesus do it!

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  9. Jeff Borden said on November 3, 2023 at 10:18 am

    The depictions of Jesus bother me a lot less than the fact so many of his followers ignore his words.

    Our new godbotherer of a House speaker proclaims his Christian faith loudly, but on his agenda is gutting the SNAP program, eliminating the ACA, deep cuts to Social Security and a move of Medicare to a voucher program and, of course, building that fucking wall to keep out the darker-hued riff-raff. Oh, and letting wealthy tax cheats off the hook, too, of course, because we all know that’s how Jeebus rolled.

    I’m through with religion of any sort, but if you’re going to practice one like christianity, maybe follow its tenets? That would be nice.

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  10. David C said on November 3, 2023 at 10:44 am

    It seems like in the past, even the lowliest church had at least semi-interesting stained glass. Sure, they usually stuck an Aryan Jesus in there somewhere but it was a very nearly well done Aryan Jesus. Now even the best churches look like Butler Buildings. They substitute PowerPoint for stained glass. I don’t think that’s a good tradeoff.

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  11. Jeff said on November 3, 2023 at 11:04 am

    But much easier to sell and repurpose when the congregation moves on.

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  12. Dexter Friend said on November 3, 2023 at 2:09 pm

    Trump recently told people he knew Mexico would never pay for his wall, that it was just a campaign gimmick.
    And for years now, it’s true that churches are and have been built in Butler Building mode and even more so, steel sided and roofed garages. I guess we should cherish the old cathedrals.
    Religions work for some but some just can’t grasp and relate to ancient stories.
    Many times in recovery meetings speakers will say how they tried religion to alleviate the horrors of alcoholism, to only find help in a simple 12 step program that encourages the drunk to surrender to John Barleycorn and not expect a savior to do all the work of soul- restoration.

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  13. Jeff Borden said on November 3, 2023 at 3:00 pm

    I had an unrequited crush on a pretty girl with honey blond hair in high school. She was a Seventh Day Adventist. What I recall from brief chats is that her church had no concept of eternal damnation or hell. Sinners were punished by never being in the presence of god. To someone steeped in Catholicism –where an infinity in hell could be the result of the “sin of self abuse” aka masturbation– it seemed like a sweet deal.

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  14. brian stouder said on November 3, 2023 at 3:22 pm

    Jeff for Thread Win , hands down! (so to speak…)

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  15. FDChief said on November 3, 2023 at 5:25 pm

    The Catholic doctrine I just couldn’t wrap my head around was “purgatory”.

    Everything else seemed binary; 50.1% good? Heaven! 50.1% evil? Hell!

    Then purgatory comes in and it’s all, like, “it’s complicated”.

    Mind you, I did like the idea that you could be totally jake with God thru work. Biggest atheist ever, but do good for those around you? Ka-ching!

    Meanwhile some of the Prods were all-in on “predestination”, which seemed like the most pointless and counterproductive form of God-pestering ever invented. You were already done from birth, so why waste time denying yourself the sins of the flesh? Why not be an evil bastard and enjoy it?

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  16. Jeff Borden said on November 3, 2023 at 5:48 pm

    It’s true! The church was still teaching in the 60s that your ticket to hell was punched if you were in a state of “mortal sin,” which was like a felony to the misdemeanor status of “venal sin.” Self-pleasure was a mortal sin. I went to confession very often –every day or two– until the sunlight broke through the dark clouds of religion for me.

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  17. David C said on November 3, 2023 at 6:12 pm

    Wasn’t it Fr. Guido Sarducci who said sin is like a bank account you start life with and every sin is a deduction? If you have money left in your account you’re in at heaven. Murder is like $1000 and masturbation is $0.25. After the laughter dies down, he says, don’t laugh it really adds up for some people.

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  18. alex said on November 3, 2023 at 9:04 pm

    My dad came from the Hungarian Calvinist tradition and he explained predestination this way: If you’re born an altruist that’s who you are and nothing will ever change it. Same if you’re born an asshole.

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  19. Mark P said on November 3, 2023 at 10:41 pm

    So assholes are born, not made? I’m pretty sure there is some truth in that, because I have met some people who were too young to have reached their level of assholeness through training alone; they had a natural talent.

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  20. Deborah said on November 3, 2023 at 11:46 pm

    We watched the movie “Nyad” on Netflix, it was good, and amazing to see two actresses in their 60s looking like it, even though their bodies were buffed up athletically, their faces showed their age, and they looked glorious.

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  21. Mark P said on November 4, 2023 at 1:20 am

    Deborah, we have watched about half of Nyad, and those were our thoughts, too.

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  22. Dexter Friend said on November 4, 2023 at 5:19 am

    I lived for 11 weeks with a barracks full of SDAs, in San Antonio’s Fort Sam Houston. These were WWII style barracks which are 3 generations of buildings gone now; they were 2 story open bays, wooden firetraps, bunks stacked 2-high, bad air. Bible-readin’ men for sure. No shellfish eating, which the mess hall cooks loved as they stole the excess shrimp and sold it downtown.
    From Google:
    “Pork, rabbit, and shellfish are considered “unclean” and thus banned by Adventists. However, some Adventists choose to eat certain “clean” meats, such as fish, poultry, and red meats other than pork, as well as other animal products like eggs and low-fat dairy.”

    IDF back at their hellbound mission of genocide: now they are bombing ambulances and saying the vehicles contain Hamas soldiers and munitions. LIARS !Monday the Gaza sewage system shuts down. No diesel to run the operation. Food? Palestinians are getting just enough water to stay alive and all they are eating is flat bread if they are lucky, and canned cheese.

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  23. tajalli said on November 4, 2023 at 12:59 pm

    Deborah, is that about Diana Nyad, the swimmer?

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  24. Mark P said on November 4, 2023 at 1:07 pm

    Tajalli, it is about Diana Nyad’s final attempt to swim from Cuba to the Florida Keys when she was 64.

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  25. Dorothy said on November 4, 2023 at 2:44 pm

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  26. Deborah said on November 4, 2023 at 2:46 pm

    This Wikipedia article about Nyad, discusses some of the disputes about her accomplishment in the Cuba to Key West swim. None of that was in the film, she was highly praised and comes off very credible even though she was kind of an asshole, very self centered, but for a woman of her age her swim was pretty amazing even if she did use some techniques that are not necessarily considered kosher. The thing I liked most about the film was the 2 actresses that played the parts of Nyad (Annette Bening) and her friend/coach (Jodi Foster), as I said before. To see older women looking like older women in movies is rare.

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  27. tajalli said on November 4, 2023 at 3:01 pm

    Deborah and Mark P: thanks for the clarification. There’s an autobiography/book available since the movie hasn’t come out on DVD. She also has an exercise book for women.

    What I really love about the BBC are their series featuring older actors and actors with less than idealized bodies/features.

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  28. Julie Robinson said on November 4, 2023 at 3:26 pm

    If I recall, Nyad was focused on the swim to exclusion of everything else, which of course would be admired in a man.

    How do you know if a British actor is going Hollywood? It’s when they get veneers on their teeth and have pearly white perfection. Sticking aroung England, it’s not necessary.

    Has anyone watched the video of the so-called new Beatles song? I’m interested in what others think. I listened to it without knowing there was a video and had opinions. Then I watched the video and had more opinions. Strong opinions.

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  29. David C said on November 4, 2023 at 5:12 pm

    The “new” “Beatles” song is OK for what it is. It’s a fleshed out Lennon demo. I can’t imagine he would have been happy with the lyrics. They’re pretty duff. It’s interesting that they were able to pull John’s vocals from the tape. It’s no classic but it’s OK, and that’s probably all anyone expected.

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  30. Mark P said on November 4, 2023 at 5:43 pm

    Nyad has some haters. There is a web site devoted to debunking her claims about the swim, as well as a lot of other things through the years. She has admitted to “exaggerating” some of her accomplishments. I suppose part of the hate is about her personality, which might be better tolerated in a man. It’s hard to know what to trust.

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  31. tajalli said on November 4, 2023 at 7:11 pm

    Mark P., there will always be haters and jealousy, people who need others to agree with them to validate their existence. Good storytelling has exaggeration, perhaps to better evoke the emotion of an event. And yeah, what would be tolerated, fondly laughed at, in a man does not fly for women, who become too threatening.

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  32. tajalli said on November 4, 2023 at 7:21 pm

    Julie, thanks for the video link! When I heard the song alone, it was merely poignant, a bit of a movie scene memory, a passing thought. But the video gives a whole other context and depth to that song. So much love, fun, regret. And Ringo remains the constant through time.

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  33. Suzanne said on November 4, 2023 at 7:49 pm

    I read Nyad’s book Find A Way a few years ago. I enjoyed it but it definitely showed that there is a fine line between competitive/motivated and unhinged. She came across as somewhat unhinged. But I guess to try what she did, you have to be.

    I attended a lecture today by a Dr William Cooke in which he discussed his book “Canary in the Coal Mine: A Forgotten Rural Community, a Hidden Epidemic, and a Lone Doctor Battling for the Life, Health, and Soul of the People”. He practices medicine in Austin, IN, the epicenter of the opioid induced HIV outbreak in 2015. It was excellent and I will definitely read the book.

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  34. FDChief said on November 4, 2023 at 9:49 pm

    Reset the stove clock so I don’t forget tomorrow morning as I was thinking 1) how weird it is not to have daylight by 8am, and 2) tonight will be the last long evening until spring.

    I have friends who fuss over the time change and while I try and by sympathetic I don’t get it. It’s never been an issue for me and an hour one way or the other seems pretty meh.

    Oregon did listen to the complaining and passed a “Die DST” bill that’s currently held up in Congress. Probably fucking Tommy Tuberville, that cluck would hold up the dawn if he thought someone was going to have an abortion that day.

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  35. Sherri said on November 5, 2023 at 12:22 am

    Well, I’ve managed to avoid the ER for several days now, knock on wood. I finally got in to see my primary care doc yesterday, who looked over everything and concluded I have a typical case of atypical pneumonia, plus a hefty dose of bad luck. I’m prone to vasovagal reactions, and she thinks that my passing out while coughing was just that, nothing more. The coughing was especially intense and deep, and triggered a reaction. The bad luck was that I hit my face when I passed out, twice, and fractured my orbital floor. The nosebleed is likely related to the trauma of hitting my face. I’ve had two head CTs, a lung CT, two EKGs, an echocardiogram, extensive bloodwork, and there’s no other obvious problem other than pneumonia.

    I am finally starting to feel better, after one round of IV antibiotics, two rounds of oral antibiotics completed, and another round about half done. I’ve never had pneumonia, and my doctor warned me; recovery is slooowww. Since I don’t even get colds that often, I’m not used to this. I never missed more than five days without a workout with Covid, but I haven’t done a workout in two weeks. I’m still waiting for surgery on my orbital floor, because the pneumonia needs to be better for that to happen, and I can’t lift anything heavier than 10 lbs for at least two weeks after that is repaired.

    At least I was able to convince my husband that it was okay to leave me at home alone for a couple of hours while he went to the gym today. Baby steps.

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  36. Deborah said on November 5, 2023 at 1:20 am

    Sherri, glad you’re on the road to recovery, slow though it may be, you’re at least going in the right direction.

    And Alex, congrats on your retirement, you’re gonna love it.

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  37. Dorothy said on November 5, 2023 at 10:43 am

    I’m with you, FD Chief. I don’t get all the fuss over the time change. It takes a couple of days, one if I’m lucky, to adjust and then it’s just ‘let’s get on with life and stop bitching and whining’ in my head. I like it brighter in the morning since I’m an early riser and always have been a morning person. If it’s darker in the evening come 5:30 or so, what’s the big deal? We are all mostly inside the house anyway, making and eating dinner, watching t.v., reading, listening to music. Who cares if it’s dark outside already? You’re going to be sleeping for the majority of the night anyway!

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  38. tajalli said on November 5, 2023 at 11:52 am

    I am also a morning person, so miss the light until the switchover in the fall. We’ve really moved past the need for DST with our 24/7 internet commerce and having to accommodate time zone changes anyhow, so it would be simpler to abandon what now amounts to a custom from the “old country” and just remain on standard time year-round.

    Alex, I finally got around to making the skillet chicken, and it was fabulous. Since I don’t have a nice seasoned cast iron skillet like yours, I did brush a tiny bit of olive oil and didn’t preheat the skillet before adding the onions – the cooking juices emerged nicely and may be more due to the added salt. I look forward to tinkering with the recipe (reducing salt and oil); I’m thinking chicken livers might be tasty this way.

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