Bad dogs and good guys.


My sister’s friend Pat in Atlanta sent me this picture. Her story:

Our family was out and about one beautiful Saturday….putz-ing around town, shopping, etc. We had included our two dogsinour adventures…as one of our stops was to the local park for the dog’s weekend walk. After stopping by a local sandwich place to get a bite to eat, we decided to pop into Kmart and browse about. My youngest son had not eaten his sandwich completely, and had neatly wrapped the leftovers in a napkin to bring home. Since the dogs were in the car and we were about to go into a store, we decided to put the leftover sandwich in the glove compartment for safekeeping (away from the dogs).

You can see what happened next. Wilma wasn’t going to let any glove compartment keep her away from her treat, and if she didn’t exactly vanquish the foe entirely, We’re sure that she would have broken through eventually.

No word on what sort of dog Wilma is. Maybe Pat will share.

One more quick bit of bloggage before I head out to tie up some loose ends — This priceless story from the Free Press, on the downfall of a self-styled superhero:

JACKSON — Several years ago in this modest mid-Michigan city, a masked man swooped down from the ether, donned a purple cape and declared himself Captain Jackson, defender of the citizenry.

…With a wink from police, Captain Jackson patrolled the streets of the struggling downtown, rousted undesirables from dark corners, made sure merchants’ doors were locked after hours, marched in local parades and collected awards from community groups.

Wearing thick gloves, he saluted passersby and, with a slight grin, posed for photos with visiting celebrities, Elvis impersonators, elected officials and even the city’s new postmaster.

All the while, Captain Jackson remained anonymous under the protective cover of gray or black masks with pointed noses. Until the Dec. 14 edition of the Jackson Citizen Patriot newspaper hit doorsteps with a headline that rivaled a DC Comics plot twist …

“Crime fighter busted for drunken driving.”

It only gets better, because of course this story is not about drunken driving, oh no. It’s about whether the paper should have unmasked Captain Jackson. It includes this priceless quote:

“My patrol days are over, I’m afraid,” Frankini told the Free Press by phone last week, before failing to show for an interview Tuesday. “We’re gonna keep going, but I guess not in Jackson. We’re definitely in danger, I know that. We’re like David Hasselhoff from ‘Baywatch’ — he had this singing career and he was popular everywhere but America. Why they decided to destroy one of the best things I know in Jackson, I have no idea.”

Somehow I think Peter Parker has this guy trumped in existential suffering, but you knew I’d say that, didn’t you?

Have a swell day, bad dogs and good guys everywhere.

Posted at 9:04 am in Uncategorized |

11 responses to “Bad dogs and good guys.”

  1. Pat said on December 22, 2005 at 9:09 am

    Wilma is a sandwich-loving pound pup.

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  2. Nance said on December 22, 2005 at 9:10 am

    Ah, the pound. Must be where she learned those street survival skills.

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  3. Pat said on December 22, 2005 at 9:11 am

    She is about 20 lbs, pomeranian mix.

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  4. MichaelG said on December 22, 2005 at 9:31 am

    That dash inspires thoughts of certain mother-in-law jokes that maybe I won’t tell.

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  5. Dorothy said on December 22, 2005 at 10:19 am

    Leftovers fit in the trunk just fine most of the time! Wowser on Wilma’s abilities for all 20 sandwich-loving pounds of her.

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  6. brian stouder said on December 22, 2005 at 11:27 am

    >Leftovers fit in the trunk just fine most of the time!

    But then the pic would be of back-seat upholstery that has been gleaned like corn on the cobb!

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  7. basset said on December 22, 2005 at 11:48 am

    Pomeranian, feh… a real dog would have taken that glove-box door clean off.

    you know those ornamental brass handles for garden hose spouts, the kind that look like birds, fish, whatever? friend of mine’s basset hound chewed one clean off last summer.

    now that’s dog damage.

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  8. basset said on December 22, 2005 at 11:50 am

    oh hell, I’m repeating myself again. “clean off” twice.

    just watched “Dirty Harry,” that’s why.


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  9. Dorothy said on December 22, 2005 at 12:45 pm

    Too bad there wasn’t video of the dog chewing into that dashboard. It would have been sent around the world courtesy of the Internet several dozen times by now for sure.

    I’m trying to think of the worst damage any of my pups have ever done. Probably would be the brand new padded kitchen chair my Irish setter and cocker spaniel worked in tandem to ruin in 1981. I assume they both worked on it – I wasn’t home to see it, only the aftermath. They shredded one side of the back, and most of the seat. When I saw it I just sat and cried my eyes out. I was too angry to even yell at them. After that, anytime I cried, (which wasn’t too often, thank God), they’d run and hide under the bed.

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  10. Amy Alkon said on December 22, 2005 at 1:55 pm

    My dog is the most precious item in my house…right behind my shoes. Luckily, she seems well-aware of this.

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  11. mary said on December 23, 2005 at 2:27 pm

    My dog Sophie once pulled up an entire living room’s wall to wall carpeting and shredded the padding. That was pretty interesting to wake up to. Smokey the lab ate the drain hose from the washing machine the other day. I didn’t notice until I started the machine and flooded the laundry room.

    Pets are so life enriching.

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