Last night I was coming downstairs after doing my nightly tuck-in duty when my foot, in a sock, slipped out from under me and I fell, in solid and spectacular fashion, directly on my butt. Even my cushiony bum couldn’t handle a load like the rest of me. Turned 180 degrees and relocated to a wrestling ring, the move would be called the piledriver. As it was, I counted myself victorious because I merely howled amorphous sounds of pain, not the stream of obscenities that bubbled to my lips.

Long story short: I’m flat on my back in bed, and I plan to stay here for a few hours. If you care to, answer my plea today: Ice, heat or Vicodin? (I’m making do with Tylenol.)

A wee bit of bloggage to bring a smile to your lips; I know it did to mine, even twisted as they are in pure, pure agony: Ken Levine’s Idol recap. A sample:

For his part, I thought Jon Bon Jovi gave the best advice all season, even better than Diana Ross advising the kids to start getting face work done now.

Argh, where are my drugs?!

Posted at 8:38 am in Same ol' same ol' |

30 responses to “Ow.”

  1. Dorothy said on May 2, 2007 at 9:04 am

    Poor baby! I have some codene-containing drugs leftover from my cartilage tear a few months back. I only used two of them. I’ll send them die-rectly if you are in a bad way!

    Feel better. BTW Mike got a job offer from Rolls Royce in Ohio. We are considering. Waiting to hear back about what they pay for in relocation – i.e. closing costs, taxes, real estate fees, etc.

  2. MichaelG said on May 2, 2007 at 9:46 am

    Feel better soon, Nance. Ken Levine is one of the best. He’s a daily smile source. Rolls Royce is in . . . Ohio? And I’ve been believing that Briddish propaganda all these years?

  3. brian stouder said on May 2, 2007 at 9:53 am

    I hate that very first millisecond – when you have lost control of events, and you know “this is going to hurt” – but before the actual pain gusts into your consciousness.

    They say when you’re in a car, your consciousness extends to include the car – so that hitting a pothole almost ‘hurts’ for an instant or two…and indeed, I crunched a fender the other day, and it was terrible at the time, and left me depressed.

    But given the choice between Madam Telling Tales’ travail, and crunching a fender – I’d take the fender!

  4. Dorothy said on May 2, 2007 at 9:56 am

    RR in Ohio does engines/turbines for power plants, etc. NOT the cars.

  5. John said on May 2, 2007 at 10:14 am

    Any massive bruising yet? Hopefully in the shape of Our Saviour or The Madonna so we can see the signed limited edition photos on E-Bay. Get well soon!

  6. LA mary said on May 2, 2007 at 10:49 am

    Ow. Back agony is the worst. One of my neighbors was in back pain a few years ago and his wife was calling around the neighborhood for leftover vicodin or demerol or whatever. She told me no one had any, but she was offered reefer by neighbors she never would have considered tokers.

  7. Andrea said on May 2, 2007 at 11:07 am

    I feel your pain. I fell the same way – socks on the stairs – back in January in the middle of the night while holding my four-week old daughter. Like Brian said, I could feel it coming and my goal was not to drop her. I had her in my left arm and tried to break my fall with my right. I ended up pulling the railing right out of the wall and landed hard on my left side, but didn’t drop the baby. I’m pretty sure I bruised or cracked a rib, which was sore for about a month afterwards, but I had more of a rug burn than exterior bruising. Luckily, I still had some prescription strength ibuprofens and percosets left over from my c-section. Hope you feel better soon!

  8. MichaelG said on May 2, 2007 at 11:21 am

    I know, Dorothy, thanks. The comment was supposed to be a joke. Hence the spelling. Rollers were, however, built in the US at one time. During the twenties RR had a satellite factory in Springfield, MA.

  9. Jonathan Arnold said on May 2, 2007 at 11:22 am

    Oh, no, not Tylenol. For muscle and back aches, you need to go the ibuprofen route. It is much more focused on those kinds of pains, rather than the headache pains. Trust me, as a consistently reoccurring back pain specialist, I survive by the grace of ibuprofen.

  10. Danny said on May 2, 2007 at 11:34 am

    Nancy, sorry to hear about your fall. Get well soon, girl. I can’t speak to what remedy you should be taking, but I heard there was a famous radio show host who had some back pain and … yadda yadda yadda … now he can’t hear.

  11. Mindy said on May 2, 2007 at 11:41 am

    Ouch. I vote ibuprofen as well. You’ll need the new sleep-inducing sort to get a decent night’s forty winks. Rest up and be healed.

  12. Connie said on May 2, 2007 at 11:42 am

    Sorry, I’m not sharing my secret stash of Vicodan with anyone. I also recommend ibuprofen for the pain, take up to 4 200 mg tablets at a time for severe pain.

  13. Dorothy said on May 2, 2007 at 1:57 pm

    I’m on Celebrex for arthritic knees, so I’m not allowed to take Aleve anymore. But I love Aleve. I highly recommend it.

    Oh MichaelG, thanks for clarifying. The other day Nancy and I exchanged e-mails and she did not know what Rolls Royce did in Ohio. So I clarified it for her. I just assumed other readers would be similarly unaware.

    BTW they came thru with a great package, so it looks like we’re pulling up roots and heading to Ohio soon. It will be nice to be closer to my engaged son and his fiance. I can participate in more wedding-related things now. The wedding is 377 days away.

  14. Dorothy said on May 2, 2007 at 1:58 pm

    OOps. 374 days away.

  15. nancy said on May 2, 2007 at 2:03 pm

    Dorothy, where in Ohio?

  16. Dorothy said on May 2, 2007 at 2:13 pm

    Mount Vernon – about 40 miles from Columbus

  17. LA mary said on May 2, 2007 at 2:22 pm

    Here’s something to make you forget about your back. Mitt Romney’s favorite book is Battlefield Earth, by L. Ron Hubbard.

  18. Danny said on May 2, 2007 at 2:54 pm

    I knew what they did, Dorothy. I believe that RRs’ main business is aero and industrial gas turbine engines. We compete with them in the latter. I don’t even know if they own the car company any longer.

  19. Jeff said on May 2, 2007 at 3:40 pm

    Dorothy —

    The good news is that housing is cheap in Mount Vernon (just north of me, in Granville where housing ain’t cheap). Pretty countryside, and while i am obligated to cheer on Denison U., where my Dearly Beloved works, Kenyon College, their loathed rivals up the road, is in Gambier just a few miles east of Mount Vernon, and they have the most amazing bookstore you’ll find anywhere, let alone in the middle of (essentially) no where.

    And the Amish country is just up the road further northeast, if you like buying quilts and eating cheese.

    Neighborly yours,

  20. LA mary said on May 2, 2007 at 6:47 pm

    Dorothy is the quiltmaitresse.

  21. LA mary said on May 2, 2007 at 7:02 pm

    News for Spriggy:


  22. nancy said on May 2, 2007 at 7:12 pm

    Good dog, George.

  23. MichaelG said on May 2, 2007 at 7:14 pm

    As I understand it, Rolls Royce engines etc. group is owned by RR. Rolls Royce cars is owned and operated by BMW. Bentley is owned and operated by VW. MG is owned by some Chinese outfit and Lotus is owned by an Indonesian bunch. Though it may be Malaysian. I can’t remember. Jaguar and Range/Land Rover are owned by Ford. Ford did own Aston Martin but they just sold it to somebody else. And so it goes. The Briddish Motor Car Industry is not what it was. Morgan lives on, though.

  24. MichaelG said on May 2, 2007 at 7:21 pm

    And congrats, Dorothy. Sounds like a great job and a very nice area.

  25. basset said on May 2, 2007 at 9:47 pm

    last I heard, MG’s Chinese owners were planning to set up production in Oklahoma.

  26. Deborah said on May 2, 2007 at 9:58 pm

    Many years ago I took a tumble down the stairs in my home while carting a laundry basket while wearing clogs, the old wooden soled ones (this was in the 80s). I landed square on my butt, my tailbone actually, that resulted in a huge bruise. I was horribly constipated as a result. A couple of doctor visits later I was back to normal. It was shear agony. I’ll never forget it. You have my sympathy completely.

  27. Dorothy said on May 3, 2007 at 7:54 am

    Thanks for the info Jeff! We’re not too clueless about Ohio since we lived in Cincinnati for 2.5 years. My cousin lives in Coshocton, and I made a quilt for her some years back. She and I drove to Charm (Amish country) to shop for the fabrics.

    If you don’t mind, would you ask your Dearly Beloved if there are any job openings in the administrative field (a.k.a. secretarial) for me? I’ve worked for executives at good companies the last 5 years or so and learn very quickly. I also would LOVE to work for a higher learning institution, as I am quite keen to go to school and get a degree. Trouble is I haven’t made up my mind yet about what I want to be when I grow up. Still… I will need a job.

  28. MichaelG said on May 3, 2007 at 8:42 am

    Shoot, Dorothy, I’m over 60 and still haven’t figured out what I want to be when I grow up. Assuming I ever do.

  29. 4dbirds said on May 3, 2007 at 10:14 am

    A day late but hope you heal quickly.

  30. Jeff said on May 3, 2007 at 3:30 pm

    Dorothy —

    Go to http://www.denison.edu and check the employment listings; Denison is that rarity where the online postings show up as early as anyone else has seen them, and they like to get the online response (it’s a very wired campus). Kenyon is even closer (depending on where you buy, of course), but i don’t know their system a’tall. Also Ohio State (osu.edu, natch) has a large branch in Newark, and employment is posted and you could apply there as well before you even get back to Ohio.

    And feel free to email me with any other questions you have (click my name and the address is mildly masked from spambots in the header of the blogspot page).

    Helpfully yours,