A little interlude.

We’re going to keep this clean for a few days. God knows what some of the newer visitors must think of me. They came here to see us lift high the bloodstained banner, and what do they get? The C-word and that other C-word.

So let’s dial it down a little. Go smoke a bowl with Mary Ann.

There. Everyone mellowed out? Good. (And thanks, Ashley, for the tippage.)

Sounds like Spitzer may be out of a job before I can hit “publish” today. Ah, well. It was inevitable. Why am I reminded of the speech Beadie gives McNulty in “The Wire” this season, about who comes to your wake when you die? “A nice guy and good tipper” isn’t the worst epitaph in the world, but for a man with three daughters, I’d say he has some reparations to make.

Fortunately, because this is politics and the great circle of life, we didn’t even have to wait a few minutes before fresh entertainment arrived: Dr. Kevorkian says he’s running for Congress. Well, he can’t practice medicine anymore and he’s overqualified to pump gas, so I’d say this fits. He’s challenging Joe Knollenberg, known locally as “Toilet Joe” for his willingness to march into battle against the scourge of low-flow toilets. Jack Lessenberry provides the details:

Toilet Joe got his nickname from his as-yet-unpassed “Plumbing Standards Improvement Act.” That would permit our Johnnys to use more than twice as much water per flush, certainly a fine environmental idea in the parched Southwest, and one of the many reasons the League of Conservation Voters rates T.J. a perfect zero.

Dr. Death vs. Toilet Joe? Where else can you get entertainment like this at these prices?

Note: Journalistic objectivity requires me to make a couple of observations. Kevorkian’s run will likely not happen; he needs to gather signatures and has supposedly been dying of kidney disease for years now, and most people think this is, what do we say these days? “A cry for help,” yes. Also, everything I know about low-flow toilets comes from Dave Barry; apparently some people really consider them an affront. But my sister remodeled her bathroom last year and cannot say enough good things about hers, which is not only efficient but, being low-flow, refills in just a few seconds. Plumbing seems much louder in the middle of the night, and a fast-refilling potty is something you want. “But what about the multiple-flush phenomenon I’ve read about, in which a simple number two cannot be sent on its way without supplemental explosives?” She said she’s never needed it, and even if you did, 75 percent of all toilet-flushing is for number one, so you’re still saving water. Having used this very toilet myself, I have to say I was impressed. It does seem very efficient for only using a gallon and a half.

So I’m voting for Kevorkian!

Actually, I can’t vote for Kevorkian, because I don’t live in his district. My own congressman is Carolyn Cheeks Kilpatrick, mother of the current mayor of Detroit. He is what we reporters generally call “embattled.” (It’s one of our special-vocabulary things, like “war-torn.”) A few weeks ago, one of our commenters, JohnC, predicted Kwame would play the race card before his current troubles are through; not to take anything away from JohnC, who is a very sharp observer, but this is a little like predicting winter will be colder than summer. It came last night in his State of the City address, the race card with extreme prejudice:

“In the past 30 days, I’ve been called a nigger more than any time in my entire life,” Kilpatrick said, his voice rising and his finger wagging at the suddenly electrified audience, which stood and applauded.

“In the past three days, I’ve received more death threats than I have in my entire administration,” he continued. “I’ve heard these words, but I’ve never heard people say them about my wife and children. I have to say this, because it’s very personal to me.”

And then, in a swipe at the media, he said, “I don’t believe that a Nielsen rating is worth the life of my children or your children. This unethical, illegal lynch-mob mentality has to stop.”

Well-played, sir! The N-word and a lynch mob in one fell swoop! Let’s see how it goes. Every week it gets worse for him, but never, ever count out a crook in Detroit. In many ways, the city hasn’t found its bottom yet.

OK. Second cup of coffee and extra sleep is now fully operational, and it’s time to get to work. No bloggage today…no, wait. Ken Levine is back on the job, taking apart “American Idol” for the amusement of parents across this great land of ours, trapped on our couches watching this crap with the kids:

Amanda Overmyer wailed on “You Can’t Do That”, a song referring to her black and white striped slacks.

Of course she’s the one from Indiana. Figures.

Have a great afternoon. I’m off to write queries.

Posted at 10:25 am in Current events, Detroit life, Television |
 

69 responses to “A little interlude.”

  1. Danny said on March 12, 2008 at 10:45 am

    OK, now that the comments are sure to die down, I might as well weigh in.

    The serious comments here ranged from “Men are pigs and it’s in their nature,” to “It’s probably the woman’s fault.” I don’t buy either one of these nor any comments that are reaching for some middle ground.

    Assuming there is no abuse, the only question that is really relevant in any marriage is, “Do you love your spouse?” And by love, I don’t just mean the feeling of affection. I mean the time-to-roll-up-your-sleeves and get to work kind of love. The love that does not seek it’s own way, but considers the other more important than yourself. In short, the I Corinthians 13 kind of love.

    To any man in an unhappy marriage, I would say “boo-hoo.” You are probably largely responsible for the way your wife treats you and even if you are not, big deal. Be a man. Love your wife. Honor your vows.

    So no, Eliot and Dr. Laura. It’s not Silda’s fault. It’s Eliot’s fault for be such a hard-hearted jerk.

  2. brian stouder said on March 12, 2008 at 10:46 am

    And Mary Anne is almost the sole survivor now; the skipper and Gilligan (another stoner) are dead, as are the Howells….don’t know about the Professor (who might be Ashley, for all we know) or Ginger.

    It’s the pig-tails on her, I say; that’s where the trouble begins

    edit: Danny, agreed about Spitzer. He seems to be a sort of idiot savant; highly advanced political savvy, and less than zero judgement and personal restraint

  3. nancy said on March 12, 2008 at 10:51 am

    Or, Danny, as the gay Methodist who married us said at our wedding: “The question we ask you to answer today isn’t ‘do you love,’ because of course you love each other today — it’s your wedding. It’s ‘will you love.’ That’s the hard part.”

  4. Sue said on March 12, 2008 at 10:54 am

    You say you’re going to keep this clean and then you start a discussion on toilets? Just guess where the comment section will focus.

  5. alex said on March 12, 2008 at 10:56 am

    I love my house but I curse the former owner for one thing: Remodeling the bathrooms and installing low-flow toilets.

    Dunno if you tried to do number two when you were here, Nance, but I’ve got the routine down pat. If it’s big break it up with the plunger. You might get it all down in three tries. For the squirts, simply remain on standby for a second flush.

  6. Danny said on March 12, 2008 at 10:56 am

    Wonderful, Nance.

  7. Danny said on March 12, 2008 at 11:31 am

    You know, we were just reflecting the other day at coffee on how Gilligan’s Island is where most of our introductions to Shakespeare came from.

    And thanks goes to Chuck Jones, who was responsible for acquainting most of us with classical music.

    Ah, we are rich with television, aren’t we?

  8. nancy said on March 12, 2008 at 11:31 am

    Alex! TMI! Silencio!

    As to your, um, problem: From what I understand, the low-flow technology has been improving steadily since the first ones came on the market. Existing water pressure in the structure is probably a factor. You may have to ask your in-house contractor if wells can produce the turbo boost needed, but my sister’s house is on a standard residential subdivision, and her LFT performs admirably. It’s all over very quickly — just whoosh and refill.

  9. derwood said on March 12, 2008 at 11:40 am

    If you buy a quality low-flow they work great. If you buy the one on clearance for $24 at Big R, you will be flushing twice. My mom would never let me replace her yellow 70s toilet because she was sure the low-flow toilet would kill her.

    Alex…you have the $24 model.

    daron

  10. Peter said on March 12, 2008 at 11:41 am

    On today’s installment of Ask An Architect: Advice on Low Flow Toilets.

    Friends, although my upcoming pilgrimage to the Kitchen and Bath Show (any week now) may change my mind, Toto is the go to brand for your waste evacuation needs. Their new 1.2 gal models are something else, and they also have the two level flush (less water for no. 1’s). And my Toto’s at home have taken everything I’ve given them and it’s one flush every time – and I’ve dropped some depth charges over the years. What can I tell you – the Japanese obsess more about toilets than they do about cars, and you know how much they obsess over those.

    YOu know, all this talk of poop reminds me of John Water’s comments on that famous scene in Pink Flamingos – “It isn’t against the law; it isn’t even a sin. I looked it up!”

    PS I just heard that Eliot is an ex-governor. Now only if the GOP perverts were as ethical.

  11. Danny said on March 12, 2008 at 11:43 am

    Sue is a prophet.

  12. Sue said on March 12, 2008 at 11:43 am

    What did I tell you?

  13. nancy said on March 12, 2008 at 11:50 am

    You people are killing me.

    Generally, when I need to get work done, I shut down both my browser and e-mail, because comments come to me as e-mail, and if I start reading them, I tend to get sucked in.

    Lately I’ve been keeping the e-mail up, because we’re getting some first-time commenters lately, and I want to approve them as soon as possible, so they don’t languish in moderation forever.

    But Peter, now I’m wondering if there isn’t a story in the low-flow toilet debate. Poo is very much on the national radar at the moment. We have our finger…on the pulse!

    Or somewhere, anyway.

    Actually, I’ve been wanting to write about colon-obsessives for a while. Maybe I can wrap it all up in a nice package after all.

  14. Sue said on March 12, 2008 at 12:01 pm

    “Maybe I can wrap it all up in a nice package after all.” Then set fire to it and leave it on someone’s doorstep? Want some suggestions? Don’t forget to ring the doorbell.

  15. derwood said on March 12, 2008 at 12:07 pm

    Sure you guys don’t know me that well…but I had a colonoscopy a few years ago. They give you pictures. I put a santa hat on mine and put “Happy New Rear” on it and included it in our xmas cards. Not all of them of course…just the friends and family I wanted to offend. Or make laugh.

    daron

  16. nancy said on March 12, 2008 at 12:09 pm

    My take would be brain-based, of course. But lately one of my favorite markets has taken to stacking giant jars of Dr Natura’s Colon Cleanse near the checkout lanes, which I find intriguing. Everything goes in cycles, and an obsession with inner cleanliness is nothing new, as any student of the road-to-Wellville era in American history knows. I wonder if it’s tied to some fin de siécle-eight-years-late thing.

    Just thinking out loud.

  17. ashley said on March 12, 2008 at 12:10 pm

    Danny: Whether to be, or not to be, that is the question that I ask of thee.

    My wife used to find it hilarious that I was introduced to Wagner by Chuck Jones, but now she realizes that without that, I probably wouldn’t have been exposed to Wagner until college.

    And don’t forget that an entire episode of King of the Hill was dedicated to the topic of low-flow toilets.

    Oh, and by the by, tomorrow is my “invasive procedure”. A friend said “think of it like you are a porn star, and this is your first DP”.

  18. LAMary said on March 12, 2008 at 12:18 pm

    Very true about low flow technology. The older ones were terrible. New ones work fine. I replaced mine last year and everyone in the household is happy with their toilet experiences.

    Speaking of poo, one of my colleagues and I have been collecting poo related names of businesses. The three winners this week are a Chinese restaurant in the San Fernando Valley calle Poo Ping, a Vietnamese restaurant on the edge of Chinatown called My Dung, and a storefront in Northeast LA that refills those big plastic water jugs called Wateria.

  19. Sue said on March 12, 2008 at 12:19 pm

    Don’t forget literature: My brother in law and I had a long discussion a couple of months ago on whether a character in one of the Looney Tunes cartoons was modeled after Lennie in “Of Mice and Men” (“I will hug him and squeeze him…”). I still think it was. And speaking of perverted classics: I watched “High Noon” AFTER I had seen “Blazing Saddles”, and unfortunately couldn’t stop laughing. I don’t know what will happen when I see “Destry Rides Again”.

  20. beb said on March 12, 2008 at 12:23 pm

    On low flow toilets I’ve heard that they need a wider discharge pipe that was common for the lower high-flpw toilets, but I Am Not A Plumber (IANAP).

    My wife made the mistake of watching the State of the City Speech last night. I thought she was going to stroke out, it made her so mad.

    I want to slap him so hard his mother hurts. Lying piece of….

    Unlike Guiliani, Spitzer didn’t assign a police escourt to his hookers, and unlike Kilpatrick, Spitzer dpes nopt appear to have used city (state) money to pay for his escapades.

  21. del said on March 12, 2008 at 12:26 pm

    Best Chuck Jones cartoon: Rabbit of Seville.

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=ewoASfRSJWY

  22. Danny said on March 12, 2008 at 12:30 pm

    You know, I think the first mistake that most American’s make in Europe is with the bidet’s. They are NOT drinking fountains.

  23. Danny said on March 12, 2008 at 12:31 pm

    Del, that was the very one I was thinking of.

  24. Dorothy said on March 12, 2008 at 12:42 pm

    We need to hook up Peter with Fred and Sharon so they can make a commercial for him.

  25. brian stouder said on March 12, 2008 at 1:03 pm

    I think tomorrow’s nn.c post should tie together Spitzer and low flow toilets, and be titled ‘We’re flush with johns’

  26. Adrianne said on March 12, 2008 at 1:23 pm

    And not to interrupt the how-low-can-you-flow toilet discussion:

    But my initial guess at the Spitz’s “unsafe” sexual practices turned out to be right. He didn’t want to wear a condom. The response of the brunette ho Kristen was, memorably, “Dude, do you want the sex or not?”

  27. Peter said on March 12, 2008 at 2:10 pm

    Tying it all together –

    Sue – that cartoon is definitely based on Mice and Men

    Danny – I loves them bidets. When my wife and I travel, we throw ice in them for the perfect wine/pop cooler.

    Del – Chuck Jones? I like McKimson and Clampett better – they could really crank out some violent ones. BTW, where have those cartoons gone? Is the only way to see them is by DVD?

    LA Mary – when I did a job in Sao Paolo my hotel was next to a drugstore called E Farto

  28. Gena said on March 12, 2008 at 2:30 pm

    you guys are so entertaining, it’s effin impossible to get anything done. i’d tell my friends, but then i’d be responsible for their kids going hungry, too.

  29. alex said on March 12, 2008 at 2:44 pm

    Speaking of restaurant names, my fave is “Thai-arrhea” (Thai Aree) in Chicago. Hottest damn Thai food I’ve ever eaten in my life and I used to think I was no wuss. Guaranteed to give stabbing abdominal cramps and projectile squirts and so good it’s well worth the trouble.

  30. Sue said on March 12, 2008 at 3:00 pm

    The unofficial tourism slogan among Wisconsinites in the know is “Come to Wisconsin and Smell Our Dairy Air”. For some reason the State tourism board hasn’t taken that one up.

  31. Harl Delos said on March 12, 2008 at 3:07 pm

    now I’m wondering if there isn’t a story in the low-flow toilet debate

    Habitat for Humanity has a store locally, where they sell recycled building materials. They never have high-flow toilets in stock; they sell as soon as they are available.

    Nelson Rockefeller funded a grant to a group to develop a composting toilet. I understand it worked well. It had a curved storage area at the bottom, so you waited 10 years, and then started removing it as fast as you were accumulating it. It was dry, loamy, odor-free, and free of any pathogens.

    A cousin of mine was thinking about installing one when he built a house. The housing permit people questioned his blueprints, saying, “You want to keep ten years of WHAT in your basement?”

  32. brian stouder said on March 12, 2008 at 3:17 pm

    Speaking of music set to shows –

    this past weekend we had a free Showtime deal on Directv, and I watched a documentary about the missions to the moon, with all-real footage, interesting (off the beaten path) music (plus the now-expected classical music, as the space craft manuever and pirouette, ala 2001: A Space Odyssey), and very compelling voice-over narration from the astronauts themselves. It put a lump in my throat and made my eyes misty – so many understatements (very Right Stuff style, indeed!); in one segment they showed a montage of one spill after another; astronauts on the face of the moon, falling on their faces, or stumbling onto their knees, or onto their backs – while one of the fellows (Collins, I think) is saying “You know, it was almost dangerous – ’cause if you ever would spring a leak, you’d die”….and of course you think “ALMOST”!!!??? “Almost dangerous???!!” Good God!! – they’re a quarter million miles from home, with the blue earth hanging in the sky above them, standing on the surface of the moon on 300 degree F sunlight in a vacuum, jumping around and falling………

    A great, great show – I will have to buy it. I think it was called Home of the Brave – from 1989 or thereabouts. One of the end-credits said “All scenes shot entirely on location by the National Aeronautics and Space Adminstration” – which made me laugh out loud!

  33. Harl Delos said on March 12, 2008 at 3:25 pm

    at MSNBC:
    Deputies said a woman in western Kansas sat on her boyfriend’s toilet for two years, and they’re investigating whether she was mistreated.

    Or constipated?

    Or she hadn’t finished the sudoku book?

    Did they discover it when he applied for a court order giving HIM a turn?

  34. LAMary said on March 12, 2008 at 4:04 pm

    There was a Simpsons episode based on “The Departed,” a few days ago.

  35. sue said on March 12, 2008 at 6:18 pm

    Del, just took a moment to watch Rabbit of Seville. Anytime Bugs is in drag, it’s a classic. I usually work alone at my night job – guess what music will be going through my head until 11:00 tonight?

  36. MichaelG said on March 12, 2008 at 6:19 pm

    I’ve been out of town the last couple of days and it sure looks like I missed a couple of good NN.Cs. Went to the women’s prison at Chowchilla.
    They’ve got their own sex scandal going on right now. Not pretty. The warden told me “If your contractor has any Brad Pitt look-a-likes on his crew, keep him off the property.” She was more than half serious.
    While down the valley, I stayed at a brand new Courtyard by Marriott. They let me sleep indoors — I didn’t have to crash in the courtyard. Anyway, the bog had some kind of blow jet toilet affair that scared the crap out of me the first time I flushed it. I pushed the little lever down as per normal and it aggressively popped right back up at me as if to cast off my hand. Startled, I drew back with a jerk and at the same time the toilet flushed with an instant and almighty 800 decibel KERWOOSH. A little kid experiencing this for the first time would be terrified into a horribly scarred lifetime of anal retention. Fortunately, I’m made of stouter stuff, but wow. I still may need counseling.

    I’m waiting for the next wife of one of these guys to balk at going up to the mic with him. “I’m not going up there. Don’t look at me, go talk to stupid.”

  37. Joe K said on March 12, 2008 at 6:46 pm

    Try watching Duck amuck, the one where bugs is drawing Daffy, or Duck Rabbit Duck, and not laugh out loud.
    Brian- I saw the same thing you did, Thought it was great. I liked the part where Pete Conrad ask his partner if he would like to fly the lunar modual and he was afraid it would break some rule. Pete said no one would ever know,cause they were on the backside of the moon. I have seen two shuttle launches over the years and they are awsome I saw one day and one night launch, the night launch left you in Aw. I can remember the Saturn -5 moon launches, that big bird sat on the pad and burned with out moving for a few seconds, then lifted off, the shuttle just lights and go’s
    Joe

  38. michaelj said on March 12, 2008 at 7:15 pm

    MSNBC: I can honestly say, I talked the Kicking Ass blog into tuning into Keith Olberman every night back in ’04, but in the last several months, he’s made every effort to portray Hillary as nuts and Obama the voice of reason. I believe both candidates are, in general, and it’s not just anybody but Bush.

    Clinton’s health carelan is more solid, and well-conceived economically, and more likely to start an economic turnaround than Obama’s. I understand both pretty well, and they don’t differ greatly, but the latters is a rehash lacking crucial elements of the former’s.

    On the Iraq invasion, well, if W and the Stovepipe gang booted Al Baradei, they broke the Public Law. You can parse the language of the Authorization however you want and claim Shock and Awe-shit was ‘authorized, but the troop invasion circumvented what the lying assholes had talked Congress into by pure subterfuge.

    I know for a fact Obama wasn’t there and had no access to the manufactured ‘intelligence’ presented to sitting members of Congress. I figure the House and the Senate were presented with bogus evidence none of them were prepared to think involved the President just lying his ass off, or the President of Vice moving his lips to say the same. How’s Congress supposed to judge, in that situation, the President capable of monstrous duplicity? When LBJ foisted Tonkin Gulf on America’s legislative bodies, dthe die was cast. In the current case, PNACenturion’s appeals to President Clinton notwithstanding, every single thing they were told was a carefully-woven tissue of lies to hoodwink them

    I was surely following it closely. I didn’t know dick about the whole thing, but what I could find out in a moment’s Google about Saddam’s capabilities, intentions, plans and thinking, anymore than Obama could in the Illinois House.

    But Hillary Clinton should have had some sort of premonition about Doug Feith so they’d no more about what Obama didn’t know??

    This criticism is a deliberately nonsensical crock of shit. And if you never heard the spectacularly well-planted and designed information, you didn’t know shit to make a judgement, but you could sure lick the frosting on the other end, when you had no vote, and what the hey.

    Tell you what. I figured one way or another all of this was Sunni vs. Shia. vs Kurds and American troops signed on for one, tops two. Now I was right about that. Don’t think Obama was. If you didn’t see Turks vs Kurds, how do you claim prescience. Prescience seems to be Obama’s claim to fame. How did he miss Kurdistan?

    Domestically. I said the caucuses were anti-democratic. In Dem caucus states: 6% of Democrats took part. Total dems in states: 2.35mil in Michigan and Florida. In all the caucus states that expressed their superiority, because they bum-rushed caucuse, 1.2mil. Somebody’s screwing with the process. These voter registration numbers can be jacked around hoowever anybody likes.

    Hillary sai in January these delegates should be seated The argument that nobody got to run adds. Well I dom’t think anything precluded running ads. Obama’s full of shit, and seems to be disenfranchising voters. But I’m supposing that’s somehow racist.

    I know this is silly. The Obama campaign says Bill Clinton is some sort of racist. Yeah, right. What kind of idiocy are you.

    Please explain how anything Bill Clinton said was racist. Please explain his Obama’s campaign said it was racist? Well, you can’t. The race card is being wielded like the hammer of the Gods. Accusing Hillary’s campaign of racism is so lame, it’s kind of like claiming Hillary supported the war. You make do with the lies presented?

    Racism brought by the Clinton campaign? Well, anything critical. Seriously lame, but that’s the whole deal. Do Americans flinch more from a woman or from a manly black guy?

    I do know this and I don’t really care about that. Americans would like to reinstate the Constitution.

    In the long run, I don’t care. I just don’t want to see some whackjob insisting we’ve got no rights of privacy, assembly, or to think what we like. My opinion? McCains about as insane as Ronald Raygun, and he’s entirely for full-on Bush KBR-Blackwater traitor for cash.

    Barak said the most obnoxiouslyi nadmissable thing. Her supporters would supporters would support me but mine wouldn’t support her. They support removing the troops but not if I don’t do it? Is he that self-messianic? If he thinks this way, is it surprising he sucks up to Raygun? Cu.t of Personality

    It’s a fact. I don’t favor lne over the other. But If you try to go all Ralph. You’re an asshole. I’m old enough to believe nobody meant anything but Bobby. Truth? That was John KERRy. Given pre-announcded cheating in Ohio, he got cheated. They ate Ohio alive and they cheated like bastards. They said they would and they did.

    So Hillary and Obama? John Kerry would have been better. But you assholes let him get slimed, and somehow that was his fault. DNC, progressives, how wasn’t that trainwreck your fault? How wasn’t John Kerry your candidate? Not heroic? Not patriotic enough>

    ?Here’s the deal lWhat I was going to say. It’s hard to explain.The President of the United States just chose to liehis ass off toComgress to make cash, and the Congress was supposed to assume he was a monster. They didn’t want to believe the President was a monster that would lie his ass off. So he just lied.

    And Congress was supposed to think the President was such a scumbag he’d lie about everyrhing he said?

    He still stilld’t. If you say he co

  39. Deborah said on March 12, 2008 at 7:19 pm

    Anyone wondering where Ginger (Tina Louise) is these days listen up. I was in New York a couple of weeks ago on business and was invited to a cocktail party by a business associate. Tina was at the party as a guest! She looked fantastic, still a red head, slim and stylish. She’s writing childrens books now they say, although I have not seen any of them. I didn’t know who she was when I spoke with her, she was very normal. Other people at the party gave me the scoop later.

  40. Dorothy said on March 12, 2008 at 7:36 pm

    Keep that up, Deborah, and you’ll be rivaling LA Mary with your brushes with greatness!

  41. Crabby said on March 12, 2008 at 7:39 pm

    Spitzer girlfriend, really (in case anyone is interested)

    http://www.myspace.com/ninavenetta

    Regards
    Crabby

  42. Deborah said on March 12, 2008 at 8:07 pm

    Wow, being compared to LA Mary in brushes with greatness is a compliment that I totally don’t deserve. But I’m flattered all the same.

  43. brian stouder said on March 12, 2008 at 8:47 pm

    Thanks for the link, Crabby. Here’s the money shot –

    http://www.thesmokinggun.com/graphics/art4/0312084kristen1.jpg

    Ashley and I can pick out at least a couple of highlights (so to speak) here

  44. alex said on March 12, 2008 at 8:53 pm

    Roach motel’s got a bikini over it.

  45. velvet goldmine said on March 12, 2008 at 9:31 pm

    I rented a Tina Louise movie a couple of months ago, and she was a revelation. What a shame GI defined her reputation. She was hellcat sexy in this flick, but in a subtle, heartbreaking way.

    Speaking of GI (ha ha), I usually run the other way during toilet talk, but Whoopie Goldberg keeps talking about hers and I really wish I had her money. Her toilet kind of washes you down, blows you dry….probably wipes your nose and sings you a lullabye, for all I know.

  46. Suzi said on March 12, 2008 at 10:09 pm

    And thanks goes to Chuck Jones, who was responsible for acquainting most of us with classical music.

    Ah, we are rich with television, aren’t we?

    So that’s who Chuck Jones was. I Googled “bugs elmer fudd kill the rabbit” and got this among others:
    http://www.thestar.com/entertainment/article/233518

    Thanks, Danny, for the history lesson. We were rich indeed.
    kill da wabbit . . .

  47. Kafkaz said on March 12, 2008 at 10:39 pm

    Sigh. How weirded out must the daughters be? Especially the eldest of them? Unless these kids are being barred from computer use, they can surf to that page–and to all of the relevant pages–just as easily as we can.

    (I was teaching an exec sort to manage his email and his online life. He Googled himself, and up popped a newspaper article about an ethics charge that had been lodged against him years earlier. He turned a bit green. Assured me that he’d been cleared. So. Can’t keep these girls away from their various internet devices forever. They *will* read this stuff, and won’t that be fun for them?)

    MichaelG–Some airport bathrooms have those automatic sonic boom flushers. My daughter was, indeed, pretty darned freaked out by that the first time around.

    Harl–You know, I just keep wondering what made the two year mark so magically motivating. What is it about that particular interval of time that finally made the boyfriend think, “Now *this* is too long?” Oddly, too, I found myself wondering how they handled holidays. I’d like to read the short story version of that scenario as handled by Douglas Adams in his Dirk Gently Holistic Detective guise.

  48. Dexter said on March 13, 2008 at 12:06 am

    By gawd, ya won’t see this every day! [not valid commentary in New Jersey, Connecticut, and New York.]

    http://graphics8.nytimes.com/packages/pdf/nyregion/city_room/20080312_SpitzerLetter.pdf

  49. nancy said on March 13, 2008 at 12:13 am

    What? A politician resigning on St. Patrick’s Day?

  50. Dexter said on March 13, 2008 at 12:15 am

    By now we all know “Kristen” is a “musician”. And you guys haven’t come up any “…and she plays the flute…” jokes yet?
    It’s been an education , these past few days…I didn’t know Eliot is a half-billionaire, and I had forgotten he won 70% of the vote…and then in a year and a few months, reversed it into an 80% disapproval factor.
    …wish I had the champagne , Guinness, and Dewar’s concession in the near – Wall Street bars yesterday after Spitzer officially resigned. Most hated governor down there since …ever?

  51. Dexter said on March 13, 2008 at 12:17 am

    …listening to Detroit mayor dropping the n word in a speech a couple nights ago. Sad . Said he was called that more than ever the past 30 days.

  52. Dexter said on March 13, 2008 at 12:19 am

    nance…did ya see Jon Stewart’s take on the St. Paddy’s Day timing?

  53. MarkH said on March 13, 2008 at 12:20 am

    OK, so I have a few brushes with greatness tucked away, and Mary Ann is one of them.

    Driggs, Idaho, where Dawn Wells moved about seven or eight years ago is 25 miles from where I live. Every now and then she shows up in Jackson, and a few years back attended our annual Labor Day Fun Run for charities pushing her nonprpfit SpudFest and actors’ workshop. About 65 at the time, she looked great, you’d know her anywhere, almost unchanged and unmistakable as Mary Ann. Very well-presented. She is very approachable, friendly, funny, yes, perky, and, well, she’s just Mary Ann fer cryin’ out loud. I got spend about ten minutes one-on-one hearing about how she came to the area, her new work with young actors and the SpudFest. GI was fun, but it was mostly over for her on TV when it ended and she doesn’t miss it or look back often.

    This incident was a bit of a stunner around here, even given the more liberal sensibilities that abound. No mugshot is flattering, but what the hell. She is nearly 70 after all, now we know what she looks like after a snootful on her 69th birthday.

    VG, that wouldn’t have been Tina’s first film, “God’s Little Acre”, would it? At her bombshell best as Griselda in that one. What a hoot, and with a very interesting cast. Tina Louise will ALWAYS look great, and she just turned 74! Always thought she was an underrated actress.

    Also, Brian, the Professor, Russell Johnson, does survive…at 84. Very active an AIDS charities these days, since his son died of it some years back. Jim Backus, Natalie Schaefer, Alan Hale, Jr. and of course, Bob Denver, all gone now.

  54. ashley said on March 13, 2008 at 1:52 am

    Great. “Kristen” is really named “Ashley”.

    Thank you, God.

  55. michaelj said on March 13, 2008 at 5:41 am

    Men aren’t pigs. DNA says pretty close, and women pretty much piglets with saucy trotters too. Older than the Bible. Women will eternally act like they don’t bother, moron guys will zoom in on tits. I’ve never seen the attraction. Legs. Maybe. Maybe. How ’bout intelligence that shines through.

    John Steed and Mrs. Peel. If there are avatars. Steed is a perfect gentleman, with brains. Mrs. Peel is gorgeous, and smarter than everybody, and she can kick about anybody’s ass. Steeds reserved, but he can kick everybody’s ass when Mrs. Peel is done with them.

    So, she’s pretty much my ex-wife, who wouldn’t take shit from anybody, and I loved her for it even when it was definitely not convenient. But, I think my point is:

    If you don’t think misogyny trumps racism, listen to Olbermann playing the hysteria card. Holy shit, Keith, what woman hurt you so badly.

    Aside from that, McCain is nuts about Iraq. What he says, you vote for this idiot, you deserve to be disenfranchised. He’s looney.

    No matter how anybody wants to put it, this isn’t anybody but W. Although McCain, that was egregiously slandered in 2000 by W, but now they’re buds.

    So now nobody wants to come back on the so-called authorisation. Nobody authoriized the invasion. You read it. Nnobodyauthorised the invasion, did they? That just happrned. Did they find Bin Laden there?

    The worst thing is so-called progessives that harp on this vote without a clue what it actually said. These assholes didn’t stand with Jphn Kerry. Holier-than-thou? Vote Nader, you assholes. Dante’s waiting. There’s no circle of hell not prepared for somebody that votes for McCain. who’s appantley insane. Shat vou;d

    Tell you what. Last time we we had an Oldtimers guy, we fucked over the Constitution and funded the most despicable scumbags you could ever hope to find.

    Iran-Contra? Please? Who wasn’t a criminal? But this is the thing. When people pull this sort of shit, they claim it was for the greater good. This was all for the greater greed.

  56. michaelj said on March 13, 2008 at 6:04 am

    Tell you what. I said caucus states are more dogass and anti-democratic,. My opinion was greeted as we would expect. I’ll say this once and future. Bussssssh 2.0

    Caucas States Votes: 1.9 mil

    Michigan and Florida votes: 2.4mil.

    So how are the caucuses represetative

  57. brian stouder said on March 13, 2008 at 7:24 am

    ‘course, one would have thought that Hillary’s almighty campaign organization would have cleaned up on straight-forward organizational tests, such as caucus elections….and yet she gets trounced in every one! Why is that?

    Michaelj, would you complain about caucuses if Hillary won them? Or, more to the point, did you decry their ‘anti-democratic’ nature BEFORE the contest began?

    As far as that goes – are you willing to say, Michaelj, that if Barrack Obama ends up with more popular votes than Hillary – that Hillary should concede to him?

    And as far as that goes – Olbermann (who, we might agree, DOES get awfully full of himself) is absolutely right about Ferraro the white-haired racist. Imagine if some old white woman walked onto the University of Michigan campus, and upon seeing an academically successful and socially popular African American student, immediately dismissed her as “lucky” to even be there, and ONLY there because she is black.

    I think we’d agree that that would be overt racism, yes? And Hillary pussy-footed around with this for two weeks….which is highly offensive

  58. MichaelG said on March 13, 2008 at 7:52 am

    Nancy, I don’t believe Eliot’s Irish. Besides, all the bishops have been trying to cancel, postpone or otherwise stave off Paddy’s day this year.

    Sorry about the bikini, Ashley. But you gotta admit she’s cuter than you.

  59. Dorothy said on March 13, 2008 at 8:00 am

    Airport bathrooms are not the only ones with those turbo-flush, ear splitting thrones. I’ve experienced them at rest stops along interstate highways and at various shopping centers.

  60. Harl Delos said on March 13, 2008 at 8:10 am

    And Hillary pussy-footed around with this for two weeks….which is highly offensive

    Geraldine Ferraro was born in 1973. I expect geezers to reflect the times they grew up in. She doesn’t get it. She’s insulted those scared white men wearing the white sheets and the dirty worn work shoes for years, and anyone that calls her a racist is evil. She’s always been charitable to her inferiors. Barack is doing damned well for a pickaninny, and he ought to be grateful that he’s even being considered for vice-president, even though he’s obviously not qualified, and who are these men in the long white coats, and where are they taking me.

    Grandpa said something about those damn niggers in the the 1960s, and I said to him, when you were in a threshing ring, one of the families was black, and what’s more, your best friend is black. “He’s not a blackie,” grandpa spat. “That’s Leo. I’m talking about the city niggers.”

    And – relatively speaking – he wasn’t a racist when it came to black folk. He didn’t have any problem having black friends eat at his table, he enjoyed it, and he didn’t quail at eating at his black friends’ tables. You couldn’t say that about the beet hunkies or dirty greasers. He hated all of them, and the ones he knew best, he hated most. But he was prejudiced against blacks he didn’t know.

    Things change with time.

    In the 1950s, “good” white folk were in favor of integration, except when it comes to marriage, because it would be a rough lift for a mulatto kid, who doesn’t fit in either society, except that when they integrated the schools, they found that familiarity breeds and these days, there are a lot of mixed race kids out there, and nobody thinks much about it, including the Archie Bunkers who find they have mixed-race grandkids. I don’t think it’s any wonder that support for Barack is much higher among kids than among older people.

    And Hillary pussy-footed around with this for two weeks….which is highly offensive

    Yes, it is. She is a monster, in many ways. She doesn’t have any idea exactly how offensive Bill’s and Geraldine’s comments have been. A lot of the pundits are talking about this election taking on racial overtones, but it’s really a proxy for age. This election is young versus old. It really would make a lot of sense for McCain to invite Hillary to be his running mate, and it would make a lot of sense for her to accept.

    Unless, of course, you’re Ann Coulter. But she’s irrelevant, these days.

  61. Dee said on March 13, 2008 at 8:16 am

    I love my power flush low water pottie. It wakes the whole house up in the middle of the night. I work the dreaded 3rd shift and the nights I am home no one sleeps.

    I can’t believe the first comment I make is for the toilet post.

    By the way three of your Google ads were for toilets and the other one was for Lincoln National Insurance.

    Great blog…

  62. Connie said on March 13, 2008 at 8:30 am

    The toilet Whoopi Goldberg talks about is sold in medical supply stores as a handicapped toilet. And it is not really an entire toilet, but an add-on that requires plumbing similar to that which connects your ice-maker, and electric. I first ran into one in the women’s room of a medical supply store.

    We occasionally visit a restaurant in Saugatuck that has one installed in the women’s restroom handicapped stall. Its various options include wash rear gentle, wash rear hard, wash front gentle, and blow dry. The water is nicely warmed. They don’t have the various massage settings turned on.

    Another hawk picture this week: http://elmores.net/round-here/comments.php?id=1253_0_1_0_C

  63. Harl Delos said on March 13, 2008 at 8:44 am

    Nice expression on the “new haircut”, Connie, but wearing only a scarf?

  64. brian stouder said on March 13, 2008 at 8:44 am

    A beautiful picture! Sometimes on the way out of the park, I will see a very large, regal looking bird perched atop a street light; no idea what it is, but one of these days I’ll have the camera with me, and zoom a shot of it.

    Harl – completely agree! The Ferraro gambit looks all-too calculated to appeal to rustic types in, say, Ohio and Pennsylvania and Indiana and North Carolina…..and your point on age is the keystone (so to speak). Older folks VOTE – and youth (traditionally, anyway) get bored and tune out.

    This is the real hell of it….November is a long way off, and the Clinton campaign seems to be consuming their seed corn on this. It might work now, and create the crack that kills them in November…..but at least when the crotchety McCain campaign plays some similarly cynical game this summer, muck rakers like Olbermann will have their bonifides in order, when they express their outrage at him.

  65. Connie said on March 13, 2008 at 8:46 am

    Harl, the scarf gets put on by the groomer and only lasts a day or two. And I just am not into dressing my dog.

  66. Kirk said on March 13, 2008 at 8:55 am

    What restaurant, Connie? Not that I’m an expert on the place, but we really liked Saugatuck and would go back. Not based on toilet amenities, of course.

    And I agree. The dog looks bitchin’.

  67. Connie said on March 13, 2008 at 9:12 am

    The restaurant is Spectator’s, just off 196 at the Saugatuck exit. (39?) We hang out for dinner in the sports bar. The other Saugatuck restaurant we tend to go to is The Butler Hotel. I think its just the Butler now. Best burger and a really good vidalia onion vinaigrette that I usually buy a bottle of to take home.

    I grew up near Saugatuck, and the few years that Michigan’s drinking age was 18 let me hang out in Saugatuck bars at an early age.

    I can also recommend good restaurants in Holland.

  68. Kirk said on March 13, 2008 at 9:23 am

    We almost went to Spectators to eat and watch a NASCAR race but wound up eating somewhere downtown that had a bar that was going to turn into a dance club, so we went to another bar (Wally’s, maybe), where we were informed that the owner didn’t like NASCAR and didn’t allow it on his TVs. I informed the waiter that his owner wasn’t very bright, and we split.

  69. Connie said on March 13, 2008 at 9:45 am

    We watched Butler lose to Florida in the sweet sixteen last year at Spectator’s. All four of us wearing our Butler swim team shirts (my daughter is on that team). The shirts got us a lot of attention.