nancynall.com » ‘Shocked and saddened.’

‘Shocked and saddened.’

Jesus Christ, my brain is going to explode before MJ gets planted. This will be like Princess Diana with three-quarters of the IQ points sucked out, worse accents, big­ger phonies and more baldly obvi­ous money-grubbing. Who ARE these mutants? Do I share a coun­try with them? How soon can we move to Den­mark or Uruguay?

Even with the TV only mur­mur­ing in the back­ground, the stu­pid­ity seeped through the room like a toxic gas. After a while I started jot­ting down the lines that pen­e­trated my con­cen­tra­tion. Entirely out of con­text, of course:

He’s cred­ited with chang­ing the way music videos were done…with chang­ing how artists were mar­keted. …These peo­ple have come here to rec­og­nize this.

Are radio sta­tions decid­ing it’s time to play Michael Jack­son music? …It’s com­fort­ing to hear this.

(Kiss­ing Lisa Marie Pres­ley on MTV was) the kiss heard around the world. It became part of the dia­logue of your home…

He wasn’t a human being, he was a phenomenon.

…And I was wear­ing these beaded socks by Bob Mackie, and he kept telling me, “Cher, I just love your socks.”

Larry King was really in a class of his own, run­ning what he called “this spe­cial, sad edi­tion of Larry King Live.” He asked one guest, a doc­tor: “What could be done to bring some­one back from car­diac arrest?” (The doc replied: “Resuscitation.”)

He pushed his celebrity guests through the mill like sports-talk radio callers the night a big coach gets fired. Disco icon Donna Sum­mer. Donna, you knew Michael, did you not? What are your thoughts, Donna? Donna, what was his great­ness? His great­ness was per­fec­tion, Larry. Will you be doing a trib­ute song tonight? I will, Larry. Thank you, Donna. Join­ing us now is Sheryl Crow, who knew him well. Sheryl, how are you feel­ing tonight?

Randy Jack­son called it “one of the biggest shocks of my life­time.” The heli­copter took off from the hos­pi­tal, bound for the coroner’s office. Where is this heli­copter going? You wouldn’t hap­pen to know, Randy? Randy didn’t know.

Madonna “couldn’t stop cry­ing.” Maybe she can draw on this mem­ory the next time she’s called upon to act.

Write it down: Drug over­dose. In true Hol­ly­wood fash­ion, his stom­ach con­tents will con­sist of brown rice, organic veg­eta­bles and Fiji water, while his blood­stream coursed with more industrial-strength opi­ates and tran­quil­iz­ers than you could find in 10 hard-case men­tal hospitals.

I’m turn­ing off the TV, and I won’t turn it back on until Eliz­a­beth Tay­lor has been wheeled home from the funeral ser­vice. You all carry on, but like For­rest Gump, I think this is all I have to say about that.

132 responses to
“‘Shocked and saddened.’”

  1. LA Mary said on June 26th, 2009 at 1:49 am

    I watched the house­wives of NJ being inex­plic­a­bly petty and nasty and then the movie “To Die For” so I could escape all the MJ stuff. It’s my son’s birth­day today, so he will for­ever remem­ber that MJ died on his birth­day, just like I will always remem­ber that Dizzy Gille­spie died on mine.

  2. Dexter said on June 26th, 2009 at 2:14 am

    LAM: Jimi Hen­drix died on my 21st birth­day, so my first legal Lucky Lager ( I was in Cal) was drunk with that pall of gloom in the lit­tle bar.
    I heard about it today when the local Toledo CBS sta­tion broke in at 1814 with a TMZ report. CNN was last to call, at about 1828.
    Brian Williams was ready to go with a full report at 1830. Lester Holt joined him shortly there­after. Holt is the same age as was Jack­son, and he reported about the peo­ple who LIVE IN VANS near wher­ever Michael Jack­son hap­pened to be.
    This was their life! Hop­ing for just an occa­sional glimpse of Jackson…that won’t leave me for a while…I have never heard of such a thing.
    Ed McMa­hon, 86. Fair age.
    FF, 62, too young, it seems not fair at all.
    M. Jack­son, 50, seems way too young, but I was not sur­prised at all.
    Elvis Pres­ley, 42. — I was 27 and 42 seemed like an appro­pri­ate age to die.
    It’s all in our minds, ain’t it? Life and death…perceptions.

  3. Hattie said on June 26th, 2009 at 2:18 am

    Oh, cripes. This is fill­ing me with Boomer hatred.
    Guess we needed a diver­sion from all that war stuff in Iraq and social tur­moil in Iran.
    Back to your beddy-byes, kiddies.

  4. Dexter said on June 26th, 2009 at 2:22 am

    Hattie…72 peo­ple killed in an Iraq explo­sion Wednes­day and US troops must cease “city involve­ment” in 4 days, nation-wide. We don’t for­get what Bush got us into, believe me.
    Do you mean you hate us Boomers?

  5. Hattie said on June 26th, 2009 at 2:44 am

    No, I feel sorry for Boomers. Sold a load of garbage and told how great it was.

  6. Hattie said on June 26th, 2009 at 4:15 am

    P. S. I do apol­o­gize and do not mean to offend. It’s been a long day. Actu­ally, it’s been a long life of see­ing pop icons come and go!

  7. Brandon said on June 26th, 2009 at 5:04 am

  8. Linda said on June 26th, 2009 at 5:42 am

    Hat­tie – a lot of the freaks who slavered over MJ were/are not boomers. Fills me with the creeps, though, since I was born in ’58, too. Now I read obits and check out the ages to see how close they are to me.

    But lost among this is that Jack­son was a really good enter­tainer. He had a fine voice, and his early train­ing at Motown pre­pared him for the video age of the 80s. He learned to dance, do cos­tumes, and put on a good show with sound and visu­als. Com­pare him to a group I saw in a club that had a big pop hit in the 80s, Mod­ern Eng­lish. They refused to do their big pop hit – the one that drew most of the crowd – till the last num­ber – yet spent some of the show chid­ing the audi­ence for their lack of enthu­si­asm! I always liked enter­tain­ers who were not ashamed that they were there to show folks a good time, and MJ never for­got that. He was rewarded for a lot of crazy later in his life, but he enter­tained like hell.

  9. coozledad said on June 26th, 2009 at 6:07 am

    I won­der how many times the guy went under the knife just to wind up look­ing like a damn Bat­man vil­lain. I hear the admin­is­tra­tion is col­lect­ing health-care hor­ror sto­ries. Well, there’s a good one.
    Didn’t T.C. Boyle write a story based on Michael at some point?
    Yeah, yeah. Maclovio Pul­chris. From “A Friend of The Earth”.

  10. ROgirl said on June 26th, 2009 at 6:14 am

    His life had got­ten so sur­real, the announce­ment of his death is mainly a con­tin­u­a­tion of the strange cir­cum­stances of his exis­tence. It’s sad because of how far removed he ended up from his phe­nom­e­nal suc­cesses, but it’s not sur­pris­ing. Fame is a bitch.

  11. Dorothy said on June 26th, 2009 at 7:14 am

    Talk about full cir­cle, Mary (your son’s birthday/MJ’s death). Princess Di died on my 40th birth­day. And MJ was born 363 days after I was born, so we’re close in age, too.

    I’m sorry he died, but he was a past-his-prime enter­tainer who had freaky dis­po­si­tions towards plas­tic surgery and young boys. Here’s hop­ing his death might allow his three chil­dren to grow up with some sense of nor­malcy. I think I just heard some­thing a week or two ago about his eldest son putting his foot down and refus­ing to wear the gauzey scarves over his face anymore.

    I always assumed some­one had molested him when he was younger — hence his ten­dency to have young boys around him. He should have been get­ting ther­apy for that, but it seems there was no one in his inner cir­cle to lead him in that direc­tion. Just a sad end to what could have been an even big­ger career than he had.

  12. Colleen said on June 26th, 2009 at 7:51 am

    Yeah, the news is going to be Princess Diana Obnox­ious for the next few days.

    It dawned on me while the early “is he dead yet?” cov­er­age was going on…this con­stant news cov­er­age is.…well…crap. There was NOTHING TO REPORT, other than he’d been taken to the hos­pi­tal. So we’re treated to a lot of garbage, spec­u­la­tion, opin­ion, made up crap and cur­sory med­ical reports.

    I may be wish­ing for the days of spe­cial bul­letins and not con­stant cov­er­age of noth­ing made to look like something.

  13. James said on June 26th, 2009 at 8:14 am

    Ewwwwww.… All that press cov­er­age for some­one who was an (uncon­victed) child moles­ter, but a creepy, creepy self-multilating freak. So many peo­ple die each day who con­tribute pos­i­tively to society…

    I know peo­ple live lives of quiet des­per­a­tion, and idol­ize the rich and famous, but seri­ously? Michael Jackson?

    I can’t stom­ach this celebrity crap.

  14. jcburns said on June 26th, 2009 at 8:17 am

    Yeah, when you get Char­lie Gib­son—Char­lie Gib­son! telling us on his news broad­cast of record that Jackson’s ‘Thriller’ “is on almost everyone’s iPods”…well, first, I checked to make sure some sort of Jacko virus hadn’t struck, but no, my iPod remains refresh­ingly Thriller-free, but with a cou­ple of early Motown Jack­son 5 cuts, phew.

    My sense of it as, well, a boomer, is that his 80s record-hustling suc­cess (unde­ni­able) was as much a trib­ute to the gar­gan­tuan machine built up around him as his own (again, unde­ni­able) tal­ent. And, uh, MTV, which was in the right place in the right time, was a big part of that machine.

    I think I’ll have to shift my media con­sump­tion over to the BBC and there­abouts to avoid this stupidity-fest. By the way, I keep hear­ing about this “Jon and Kate”. You’ll let me know if I’m miss­ing any­thing there, too, right? Thanks.

  15. mark said on June 26th, 2009 at 8:29 am

    Thank you for your post. I agree 100%, you said it bet­ter and it saved me the nau­sea of try­ing to say it at all.

    I am embarassed for my country.

  16. derwood said on June 26th, 2009 at 8:47 am

    I enjoyed watch­ing Wolf Blitzer say the words “Beat It” over and over.

    The cov­er­age is over the top…Media was get­ting bored, this will give them some­thing to chew on for a few days and give the rest of us a chance to read a good book.

    daron

  17. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 26th, 2009 at 8:57 am

    Bran­don, thank you.

    Smokey Robin­son had bet­ter get a week when the day comes.

    I watched two old Sher­lock Holmes/Basil Rath­bone movies to escape the cov­er­age, Hound o’ Baskervilles and Pearl of Death. Sure enough, woke up to Morn­ing Joe doing the racial pol­i­tics of “Black and White,” so i didn’t miss much.

    Cap and trade debate, y’all?

  18. MarkH said on June 26th, 2009 at 9:40 am

    I agree with Nancy whole-heartedly. And (lower case)mark. And Jeff(tmmo). The Woman in Green is one of my favorite Rathbone/Holmes flicks. Was that the one with Rondo Hatton?

    I always thought “Off The Wall” was a mas­ter­piece, befit­ting both his tal­ent and that late-‘70s music era. But after
    “Thriller”…

    But, I’m back to my usual finan­cial chan­nel surf­ing this morning.

  19. Sue said on June 26th, 2009 at 9:47 am

    It was inter­est­ing to see the gen­er­a­tional reac­tion among peo­ple I know. Every­one younger was talk­ing about Thriller and sil­ver gloves (or what­ever), and for some rea­son I couldn’t get the song “Ben” out of my head. Of all the legacy songs to remem­ber… “Ben”? Even “Rockin’ Robin” would have been bet­ter. But I’ve always seen him in terms of early career, not the rest of the stuff.
    I’m kind of embar­rassed to say this, but some peo­ple are not of this world and leav­ing early might not be the tragedy it seems.
    I’ve been watch­ing ESPN.

  20. Julie Robinson said on June 26th, 2009 at 9:49 am

    The TV and radio were both off last night and I lis­tened to the cast record­ing of the new West Side Story (meh). But I was sur­prised at how dev­as­tated both my kids were. They are both musi­cians so I guess that’s part of it.

    Back when our son was about 10 he hap­pened to see a clip of the early Jack­son 5 and came to us with this burn­ing ques­tion: “Michael Jack­son used to be black?”

  21. 4dbirds said on June 26th, 2009 at 9:54 am

    My sis­ter, a nurse prac­ti­tioner, told me that if you need CPR and aren’t in a hos­pi­tal or really really close to one, your odds aren’t good. So when the news broke that he was found in his home not breath­ing and hav­ing suf­fered a heart attack, I fig­ured he wasn’t com­ing back.

    Michael Jack­son was a true tal­ent. A weird trou­bled per­son but no one can deny that he wasn’t tal­ented. I did hear some com­men­ta­tor say yes­ter­day that his truly weird behav­ior seemed to man­i­fest itself after the Pepsi com­mer­cial where he was burned.

    Another death on a birth­day. Tim­o­thy McVeigh was exe­cuted on my father’s birthday.

  22. Joe Kobiela said on June 26th, 2009 at 9:59 am

    More famous dead than alive.
    Like Elvis, bril­liant career move.
    Check out Ken Levin blog.
    Pilot Joe

  23. Linda said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:01 am

    Julie I can beat the one about “Michael used to be black.” When my nephew was lit­tle, he was unclear on Michael’s gen­der. He thought there was a male Michael, and a female one, in dif­fer­ent videos. MJ just bent all kinds of barriers.

  24. nancy said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:03 am

    “Only in Amer­ica can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman.” — Source unknown.

  25. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:09 am

    Has any­one seen LaToya and Michael in the same place? If no one sees LaToya in the future, hmmmmmm.….

    Rondo Hat­ton was The Creeper in “Pearl of Death,” the large fel­low with the grotesquely mis­shapen head. “Woman in Green” was based on the “Empty House” story, the first one after Conan Doyle brought Holmes back, and i think was the first Mori­arty appear­ance in a movie. (BTW, if you’ve not read the Michael Kur­land (sp?) nov­els about Prof. Mori­arty as the pro­tag­o­nist, of which there’s, i think, three — very fun reading.)

    Jour­nalese alert — can we ban “vio­lent storms bat­ter”? Thank you.

  26. alex said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:19 am

    “Only in Amer­ica can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman.”

    Joan Rivers, back when she was being groomed as Johnny Carson’s replace­ment. I remem­ber it well.

  27. Connie said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:23 am

    I’ve had the TV off for about two weeks now, and plan to con­tinue for a while, so if Michael Jack­son is still dead all week­end I won’t see it. So why watch TV indoors when it’s a per­fect pool day out­side? And I’ve got the pool, after all. My guy is in Louisiana for his Viet­Nam bud­dies reunion, my daugh­ter is going to visit her grand­mother in Flint, AND I AM HOME ALONE!

    When my kid was young and they asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day I used to say for them to go away and leave me home alone.

  28. 4dbirds said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:23 am

    I wouldn’t be more famous dead but I’m cer­tainly WORTH more dead than alive.

  29. adrianne said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:49 am

    Nance, your riff about the con­tents of Michael J.‘s stom­ach had me laugh­ing out loud. My short take on Michael to my boys, who had vaguely heard of him: great per­former who later became creepy child molester.

  30. Danny said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:00 am

    Yeah, me too, 4dbirds. I some­times won­der why when we quar­rel, the pupils of my wife’s eyes change in shape from 0 | 0 to $ | $. Odd, that.

    You know, I’ve been think­ing about the fact that Thriller is the best sell­ing album of all time and it occurs to me that this would not be the case if it weren’t for the video(s). I’m not deny­ing tal­ent, but I don’t think the music stands up well just by itself.

  31. Connie said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:09 am

    We’ve had a goofy con­ver­sa­tion going here at work this a.m., as to which MJ song is stuck in your head. So far I have heard, Beat It, Smooth Crim­i­nal, and PYT. Unfor­tu­nately some blog I read men­tioned a song that is my ear­worm of the moment: Ben. A song about a rat.

    Per­haps I should just go watch the Korean pris­on­ers do Thriller on Youtube.

  32. Dorothy said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:11 am

    Con­nie I know just what you mean. My hus­band is dri­ving into Pitts­burgh tomor­row to visit with his dad for the day. (His dad refuses to come out and stay with us even though it’s just a 3 hour drive one way.) His birth­day is Tues­day and he’ll be 81. But all I can think about it is how great it’s going to be to have the whole damned house to myself for about 12 hours.

  33. jeff borden said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:18 am

    I will cop to own­ing “Thriller” and includ­ing “Bil­lie Jean” on a few of my party tapes, but oth­er­wise, I gave the guy’s music pretty wide berth. I was in my punk/New Wave phase when he was rul­ing the dis­cos with “Off The Wall,” so I tended to view him as dis­mis­sively as the other disco purveyors.

    Two quick points:

    Jack­son did break the color bar­rier on MTV. This is lost in the haze of time, per­haps, but MTV was exclu­sively devoted to white rock­ers until the videos from “Thriller” arrived. It always frosted me that those orig­i­nal “vee­jays” never acknowl­edged that black artists had more or less invented rock ‘n’ roll.

    Fam­ily patri­arch Joe Jack­son was, by all accounts, a mon­ster. Maybe because he was the youngest and the most tal­ented, Michael grew up the weird­est and the creepi­est, but the whole clan is odd. Again, not for­giv­ing any­thing Jack­son did, but I think his child­hood may have been far more tragic than he ever let on.

  34. Sue said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:18 am

    Con­nie, do you need help with the words? I remem­bered every damn one.

  35. Danny said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:20 am

    Well, how­ever Joe Jack­son is viewed, Jeff, I think we can all agree that “Is She Really Going Out with Him?” was a great song…

  36. Connie said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:26 am

    Nope. Sue, I know all the words to all the songs. Really, not just Michael Jack­son, but the organ les­son pop songs from the 20s to the 60s, all the old hymns, any­thing Mitch Miller did, and the pop of my teen years. Wish I could clear out some of that brain stor­age for more impor­tant stuff, but oh well. Some­times it comes in handy.

    See the Pyra­mids along the Nile.…..
    Franky and Johnny were lovers.…..
    There is a tav­ern in the town.…
    Ben, most peo­ple would turn you away.…

  37. Sue said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:39 am

    Funny you should say that Con­nie. My neme­sis songs, the ones that haunt me because they’re so awful and so infu­ri­at­ing, are the “des­per­ate women” songs of the 60s, and they will not go away. They pop into my head sev­eral times a year, all together to tor­ment me.
    Vickie Carr’s “It must be him” (let it please be him, oh dear god it must be him…);
    That one they swiped for a per­fume com­mer­cial a few years back about how he put his hand near mine and then he touched me and sud­denly noth­ing is the same;
    The Dusty Spring­field one about wear­ing your hair just for him and doing the things he likes to do because that’s how you catch him…
    What is wrong with these women? Yes I know they came out pre-women’s lib but even as a kid I thought they were nuts.
    Well, at least “Ben” is out of my head now. Now I need to go lie down in a dark room.

  38. Dave said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:43 am

    Does any­one else remem­ber the Motown reunion show where Michael unveiled the Moon­walk dance. I think that was before Thriller and the BIG super­star­dom came his way. Wasn’t Thriller the longest music video made at that time, I remem­ber when they debuted it on NBC’s Fri­day Night Videos. Yes, I watched it.

    The Motown reunion show was also known for the on-stage reunion with The Supremes, where Diana Ross more or less tried to push Mary Wil­son aside.

    Not LaToya, but I remem­ber read­ing sto­ries about not see­ing Michael and Jan­ice in the same place at the same time. Of course, as Michael con­tin­ued to make him­self more weird look­ing, that proved out to be com­pletely unlikely.

    And, MMJ­eff, you know Smokey Robin­son, when the time comes, will never get this kind of play.

    “Is She Really Going Out with Him” is a great song, Danny, good line.

  39. Jolene said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:47 am

    The Motown 25 show was, indeed, ter­rific. Also notable was a per­for­mance by Mar­vin Gaye, look­ing fab­u­lous in a white suit.

  40. Catherine said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:10 pm

    Sum­mer of 1984 I spent in Greece. In the light of day, I was more of a Joe Jackson/Talking Heads fan, but at night, we always knew which club to pick — it was the one play­ing “Bil­lie Jean.”

  41. ROgirl said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:23 pm

    At Motown 25 Di didn’t TRY to shove Mary, she gave her a big old heave-ho. It wasn’t shown at the time, but I remem­ber see­ing a clip of it a few years ago.

    Speak­ing of Motown, Mon­ica Cony­ers has pleaded guilty to con­spir­acy to com­mit bribery and is fac­ing up to 5 years in prison.

  42. LA Mary said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:31 pm

    That’s Wishin’ and Hopin’, Sue. A clas­sic. And Con­nie, Mitch Miller pro­vided me with famil­iar­ity to all sorts of songs you never hear any more. My kids are in awe (or some­thing) when I know all the words to I’ve Been Work­ing on the Rail­road. Hymns stay stuck too. My younger son went to a pre-school next to a Pres­by­ter­ian Church,and often when I was there to pick him up, there would be a hymn being played on the chimes. How on earth do I still remem­ber the words to “Have Thine Own Way, Lord?”

    Off the wall had some songs that were good party mix dance songs back when it first came out. Thriller didn’t do any­thing for me. MJ was very tal­ented and orig­i­nal, but he was just so sick and had the money to not do any­thing about it.

  43. Connie said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:32 pm

    TMZ as quoted on Huff­in­g­ton: Fam­ily says it was daily Demerol shot.

  44. Sue said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:36 pm

  45. nancy said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:36 pm

    Hank gave us a shoutout over at the Wash­Post chat. Thanks, Hank. He’s going to be a busy boy for a while.

  46. beb said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:42 pm

    39 com­ments by noon. This has clearly touched a nerve. But more like the nerve touch of a spinal tap. Write it down, Nancy said, drug over­dose. And, lo, this morn­ing TMZ is talk­ing about Jack­son hav­ing injec­tions of der­merol. Wow! At least it wasn’t auto-erotic asphixiation.

    Dex­ter at 2 sums things up nicely. Elvis was only 42? Man, I thought he was older since he had come, gone and had Vegas revival. Seemed like he’d lived a life­time. Christ, I mean my one and only daugh­ter was born when I was 42. My life started when the king’s ended. That’s sobering.

    Jeff(TMMO) can we ban “vio­lent storms bat­ter”? Sounds bet­ter on Cat­fish, if you know what I mean.

    The 24/7 MJ-athon has been pre-empted in Detroit, the City that keeps on giv­ing, where Mon­ica Cony­ers has plead guilty to one count of con­spir­acy to com­mit bribery. The FBI has issued a state­ment to evil-doering that they’re com­ing after them. Nor­mally the FBI refrains from melo­dra­mat­ics so maybe they’re been watch­ing Pub­lic Ene­mies again. Inter­est­ingly the big debate is between whether she does 3 years or 5 years of jail time. Amaz­ing since Kwame only got a cou­ple months. Of course peo­ple are spec­u­lat­ing that “City Offi­cial A” men­tioned in today plea deal is in fact Kwame, which if true will put an end to any posh job in Dallas.

  47. Brandon said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:44 pm

    To Jeff (the mild-mannered one), you’re wel­come. I found those papers through Newseum’s Front Pages: http://​www​.new​seum​.org/​t​o​d​a​y​s​f​r​o​n​t​pages/

  48. Sue said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:46 pm

    A com­ment on the other hot topic of recent days:
    Finally, a polit­i­cal wife who’s doing it right. A (so far) per­fect com­bi­na­tion of grit, class and whup-ass. Show us how it’s done, girl!
    http://​www​.cnn​.com/​2​0​0​9​/​P​O​L​I​T​I​C​S​/​0​6​/​2​5​/​s​o​u​t​h​.​c​a​r​o​l​i​n​a​.​s​a​n​f​o​r​d​.​w​i​f​e​/​i​n​d​e​x.html

  49. Scout said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:50 pm

    If I let it, the media would com­pletely ruin my taste­ful nos­tal­gia for these two icons of the era of my com­ing of age. The pass­ing of FF and MJ affect me mostly because the ret­ro­spec­tives bring back mem­o­ries of the per­son I was then more than who they were. So I will pass on the 24 – 7 blitz and blather that is already in infes­ta­tion stage and fil­ter carefully.

    MJ was a big tal­ent but a tor­tured soul and the bizarre (or maybe not really, put in con­text) end­ing is likely fit­ting. And yeah, I’m bet­ting OD. Thought so even before I heard the scuttlebutt.

  50. Rana said on June 26th, 2009 at 12:58 pm

    My own sense of Michael Jack­son (from some­one who was in high school in the 80s): Thriller, moon­walk­ing, the glove… big gap… creepy, sad per­son with all kinds of men­tal issues. I didn’t have much of a sense of him while he was in the Jack­son 5, but cer­tainly many of my class­mates found him com­pelling back in the day. Even if you weren’t a huge fan, learn­ing to moon­walk was almost de rigeur. (I still remem­ber Michael J. Fox’s char­ac­ter des­per­ately moon­walk­ing after being told to “dance” by thugs in one of the Back to the Future movies.)

    A lot of my friends are express­ing their dis­may and shock that he’s gone; it all makes me won­der how much of this is an expres­sion of grief for the loss of a per­son, or of a nos­tal­gic regret for a youth that’s reced­ing in the mir­ror. I’m not some­one who has ever had a crush on a celebrity to that degree, so mostly I feel bemused. I’m keep­ing quiet in my cir­cles because I don’t want to upset them fur­ther with my dis­in­ter­est, so I’m glad you started this dis­cus­sion, Nancy.

  51. LA Mary said on June 26th, 2009 at 1:03 pm

    Sue, Mrs. San­ford not only had a career of her own before she mar­ried Mark, she is the heir to the Skil power tool money. She’ll be fine.

  52. Catherine said on June 26th, 2009 at 1:15 pm

    Thanks for the link, Sue, and I’ll just echo LAMary: It helps to have your own money in these sit­u­a­tions. You come at BS like that from a posi­tion of strength. I think that’s at least part of Eliz­a­beth Edwards’ moti­va­tion with her book deal. In my top 5 list of things I’d like my girls to believe: Don’t ever let a man be your meal ticket.

  53. Sue said on June 26th, 2009 at 1:25 pm

    I’m just happy to see the way she’s han­dling the sit­u­a­tion. Too many (ok, all) recent polit­i­cal wives have stood grimly next to their hus­bands, look­ing mis­er­able but Doing The Right Thing, and some of them had resources that would have allowed them to do what Ms. San­ford did. This is some steely-eyed, head-held-high class here, and I like it.

  54. Hattie said on June 26th, 2009 at 2:13 pm

    If there is a lot of nos­tal­gia around Jackson’s death, then I have to agree with Simone Sig­noret, who wrote a book called *Nos­tal­gia isn’t What It Used to be.*

  55. 4dbirds said on June 26th, 2009 at 2:23 pm

    All these ‘ador­ing’ fans ‘think’ they’re griev­ing but of course they aren’t. They get to feel sad and put pic­tures and can­dles out with­out actu­ally expe­ri­enc­ing the gutwrench­ing knot of loss. I say this because I never knew what true grief was until I lost one of my sis­ters three years ago.

  56. Danny said on June 26th, 2009 at 2:48 pm

    Saw this on Slashdot:

    yeah — “he touched a lot of people”

  57. Brandon said on June 26th, 2009 at 3:00 pm

    All these ‘ador­ing’ fans ‘think’ they’re griev­ing but of course they aren’t. They get to feel sad and put pic­tures and can­dles out with­out actu­ally expe­ri­enc­ing the gutwrench­ing knot of loss. I say this because I never knew what true grief was until I lost one of my sis­ters three years ago. – 4dbirds

    Indeed.

    As for nos­tal­gia, I think there’s a gen­er­a­tion gulf between peo­ple who won­der what the big deal is and those who grew up in the sev­en­ties, eight­ies, and early nineties. Remem­ber that Thriller and MTV fueled each other’s growth: MTV pro­vided a venue for MJ’s videos from that album and Michael, in turn, attracted view­ers to the young network.

    Even before that, Michael Jack­son was the most charis­matic child star since Shirley Temple.

  58. moe99 said on June 26th, 2009 at 3:01 pm

    I’m so darn busy w/ a new puppy (minia­ture dachs­hund and per­haps some bea­gle) that I don’t have time for tv.

    But good to know that Gov. San­ford is tak­ing a bib­li­cal angle to his defense, i.e. David didn’t resign after Bathsheba, so why should he?

    http://​tpm​muck​raker​.talk​ing​pointsmemo​.com/​2​0​0​9​/​0​6​/​s​a​n​f​o​r​d​_​k​i​n​g​_​d​a​v​i​d​_​d​i​d​n​t​_​r​e​s​i​g​n​_​s​o​_​i​_​w​o​n​t​_​e​i​t​h​e​r​.​p​h​p​?​r​e​f​=fpblg

  59. Dorothy said on June 26th, 2009 at 3:11 pm

    Okay some­one brought up Dusty Springfield’s name. For­give me if I’ve told you all this before but I’m gonna tell it again anyway.

    She sings a song that has a line that goes “You don’t have to say you love me, just be close at hand.” My hus­band re-wrote the line to say “You don’t have to say you love me, just pull down your pants.”

    I can’t hear that song on the radio now and NOT sing Mike’s new lyrics. I just have to be care­ful not to do it in public.

  60. James said on June 26th, 2009 at 3:56 pm

    OK Nancy, you called it.

    (But it was an easy prediction)

  61. ROgirl said on June 26th, 2009 at 3:58 pm

  62. nancy said on June 26th, 2009 at 4:24 pm

    Call­ing an OD on MJ is like pre­dict­ing win­ter in Michi­gan will have some sub-freezing days.

    As for San­ford, I take all my sym­pa­thy back. Sooner or later, these guys all revert to GOP form, and play the reli­gion card. (Not to men­tion com­par­ing him­self to King David.) If I were Mrs. S., I’d be call­ing my lawyer with a one-word mes­sage: “File.”

  63. Sue said on June 26th, 2009 at 4:44 pm

    When San­ford said there are moral absolutes, and that God’s law is there to pro­tect you from your­self, I thought that was a clear indi­ca­tion that he under­stood the enor­mity of what he had done, from his own reli­gious per­spec­tive. He wasn’t using his reli­gion to weasel out of any­thing, and he was tak­ing respon­si­bil­ity as a reli­gious per­son rather than assum­ing for­give­ness based on his Chris­tian­ity.
    The King David angle throws him right back in the pond with the rest of the scum­fish.
    An imag­ined con­ver­sa­tion:
    “But honey, King David did it!“
    “King David wasn’t mar­ried to me, asshole”

  64. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 26th, 2009 at 4:58 pm

    Rana had “or of a nos­tal­gic regret for a youth that’s reced­ing in the mir­ror” as an option for under­stand­ing the mediorgy that’s appar­ently still on my TV — oh, to lis­ten to Wolf Blitzer read in Blitzer­ian tones the breath­less Liz Tay­lor state­ment. I’m laugh­ing so hard i need oxy­gen, like in a hyper­baric cham­ber or something.

    The “man in the mir­ror” is reced­ing faster than your albums are warp­ing in the hot sun, but there’s Hillary Rosen, Donna Brazile, and Wolf lit­er­ally com­par­ing their album col­lec­tions on “The Sit­u­a­tion Room.” Hello, take it to “The View,” OK?

    I’ll have to catch up on what San­ford is blot­ting his copy­book with now, but i can tell from what i’m read­ing here that it’s rea­son num­ber 27 for griev­ing that they won’t make more “Kings” episodes after they burn off the next few Sat­ur­days what they have in the can. Aside from Ian McShane, i wanted to see how their take would han­dle not only the whole David & Michal rela­tion­ship, but where they would go with Bathsheba (in the third sea­son), but it is not to be.

    I guess it’s time for my daily Demerol shot.

  65. jeff borden said on June 26th, 2009 at 5:02 pm

    Oh dear God, but Mark San­ford is an ass­hole. He’s the gov­er­nor of a strange lit­tle state but com­pares him­self to King David? Well, he cer­tainly has the chutz­pah for which David was known. What.A.Creep. Almost makes me wish I lived in S.C. so I could vote against him.

  66. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 26th, 2009 at 5:16 pm

    Well, let’s be accu­rate — David prob­a­bly ruled over about a fifty mile by hun­dred mile king­dom, and not quite all of that. SC is a bit larger!

    Robert Hein­lein — Man is not a ratio­nal ani­mal; he is a ratio­nal­iz­ing ani­mal. San­ford has shifted back into self-justification, more’s the pity.

  67. MichaelG said on June 26th, 2009 at 5:26 pm

    My for­mer wife once lived with Ian McShane in the South of France. We never talked about it much but she did say that he was a “won­der­ful man”.

    I’m still try­ing to think of some­thing to say about MJ other than to note that I do not own any of his records.

    I always liked Far­rah Faw­cett. She was a lovely woman who deserved bet­ter than Ryan O’Neal.

  68. moe99 said on June 26th, 2009 at 5:29 pm

    You know, Jefft­mmo, I lobbed you a soft­ball. Oh well.

    How’s this for starters:

    The man needs to read his Old Tes­ta­ment again if he thinks David walked away scot-free from his sins. The imme­di­ate pun­ish­ment levied on David for his wrong­ful actions with Bathsheba included plague and famine upon the land of Judea, and the death of David and Bathsheba’s first child. The long-term pun­ish­ment included the rape of his daugh­ter Tamar by her half-brother, Amnon, and the mur­der of Amnon by David’s son Absa­lom, who was him­self later mur­dered by David’s gen­eral (and nephew) Joab dur­ing Absalom’s rebel­lion against David.

    And David, as the king anointed by God’s direc­tion, didn’t have the option of resignation.

    So which of his kids does San­ford want to execute?

  69. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 26th, 2009 at 5:47 pm

    And you know what? Moe has it spot-on — this kind of behav­ior kills kids. Not right away, but in over­doses and car wrecks and domes­tic murder-suicides years later. Which is what i hear Jenny San­ford say­ing: i have a full­time job try­ing to make sure our sons still know that they are loved by at least one par­ent who takes their lives and devel­op­ment more seri­ously than they do than someone’s mag­nif­i­cent globes on the other side of the globe. What those boys must think about their father, about what it means to be a hus­band and father when they grow up … what it means to love and be loved.

    Of course, if i were of an inap­pro­pri­ate frame of mind, i could describe two fam­i­lies off my desk today that make the San­fords sound down­right Cleaver­ish, even as things stand right now, but the tragedy is that the out­comes are pos­si­bly going to be much the same for the kids.

    He shouldn’t resign because he schtupped an Argen­tin­ian, or even because he was clever enough to launch a South Amer­i­can eco­nomic devel­op­ment ini­tia­tive in the wake of his blos­som­ing e-mail dal­liance, or because he tech­ni­cally should reim­burse at least some of a trip that might have had a jus­ti­fi­ca­tion, but was used for an indis­cre­tion — he should resign because he just isn’t think­ing ratio­nally at all, and i hope Cubby Cul­bert­son or some­one he still lis­tens to can tell him that.

    Is any­one else watch­ing CSPAN right now? Since that’s the only chan­nel serv­ing the pub­lic inter­est right now, whether you’re for Cap and Trade or agin’ it. 3:09 am, indeed.* And Blitzer’s albums, ask­ing Brazile “do you have this one? What about the orig­i­nal cover for “Off the Wall”? It sounds like kids trad­ing Poke­mon cards.

    *When the 300+ page bill was dropped off for mem­bers to vote today on Waxman-Markey.

  70. James said on June 26th, 2009 at 5:57 pm

    Just saw this car­toon. Funny one, about generic response to celebrity deaths.

  71. Jolene said on June 26th, 2009 at 7:19 pm

    Great car­toon, James! Really like it.

  72. joodyb said on June 26th, 2009 at 7:38 pm

    ink-stained wretches herein will get why this is the wire bleat that sent us all into stitches last night around 2330CDT:

    In Hol­ly­wood, about 75 fans gath­ered at what they believed was Jackson’s star on the Walk of Fame, only to dis­cover it belonged to the Los Ange­les radio per­son­al­ity of the same name. Jackson’s star turned out to be cov­ered by scaf­fold­ing for the pre­miere of Sasha Baron Cohen’s “Bruno.”

  73. alice said on June 26th, 2009 at 8:28 pm

    The MJ of great per­for­mances died a long time ago.

    Last night Ober­mann was say­ing how MJ’s 2 minute role in Men in Black showed he had a sense of humor about him­self. No, honey, he read 3 lines some­body else wrote for him to say. I don’t think MJ had a sense of humor at all.

    I am sorry about Farrah.

  74. LA Mary said on June 26th, 2009 at 9:18 pm

    Joodyb, those peo­ple didn’t leave the wrong Michael Jack­son star even when they were told it was the wrong place. The local CBS news guy was inter­view­ing them and telling them about the mis­take and they all stayed and kept say­ing they just needed to be there.
    And Far­rah did deserve bet­ter than Ryan O’Neil. He seems to be a real ass­hole and a very bad father. Three kids, three very messed up adults.

  75. brian stouder said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:29 pm

    The young folks and I just returned from vis­it­ing Grandma, and I repeated to her what I remem­bered of the day we got the flash that Elvis Pres­ley was dead — and she imme­di­ately added to the story. She recalled that it was late after­noon (another MJ par­al­lel), and that when she saw it was break­ing news from Ten­nessee (maybe they had a map of Ten­nessee up? I don’t recall that) — her first thought was “Oh, great! Has James Earl Ray has ‘escaped’ from prison??!” — so that the real­iza­tion that the news was that Elvis was dead was almost (oddly) reas­sur­ing — even as EP’s death stunned her.

    I just never would have made that par­tic­u­lar jump.…but think­ing about it, back in those immediate-post Viet­nam, post-riot, post assas­si­na­tion days, an avid reader and news con­sumer such as her can’t be blamed for expect­ing any sort of bad news, when “SPECIAL REPORT” popped up on the screen.

    I remem­ber the day I got home for lunch (from my full-time job at the Maloley’s store #16 at Hes­sen Cas­sel and Pauld­ing Road!) and popped on the TV — to see the dreaded “SPECIAL REPORT” ban­ner, and a cheesey map of the mid­dle east plas­tered across the screen, accom­pa­nied by the restrained urgency of a telephone-receiver-voice of a reporter.

    I remem­ber think­ing it must be war, and it must be bad.…it was almost a relief that it was “only” the assas­si­na­tion of Anwar Sadat.

  76. Kirk said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:34 pm

    Didn’t see Far­rah in a lot of things (and never could stand to watch more than a cou­ple of min­utes of “Charlie’s Angels”), but I was impressed by her work in “Extrem­i­ties,” an intense 1986 film in which she plays the intended vic­tim of a would-be rapist and turns the tables on him.

  77. Deborah said on June 26th, 2009 at 10:54 pm

    In 1977 when Pres­ley died I was in the hos­pi­tal recov­er­ing from surgery. My then hus­band came to visit groggy me and told me that Elvis had died that day, I was stricken because I thought he was talk­ing about a woman at our church named Elvis. I was so drugged it took me a while to sort it out.
    I was never an Elvis fan but I am in an Elvis movie. I was in the crowd at the Orange Bowl Regatta boat races in Miami, Florida on New Years day in 1967 which they used for scenes in the movie Clam­bake (really bad movie). I was 16, on a blind date with some creep who was a friend of my sister’s boyfriend. I’m the skinny blond in the stands with my hair in a flip and wear­ing a pink shift and pink hair rib­bon. Good luck try­ing to find me.

  78. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:09 pm

    “His career is no con­cern of mine.” Wow. In con­text, that’s an awe­some thing to say. Quite a lady.

  79. brian stouder said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:13 pm

    Hah! I’ll have to watch Clambake!

    There is a truly bad rac­ing movie called “Dri­ven” –with Sly Stal­lone (is HE still alive?) and Burt Reynolds, and I was at the race at Chicago that they used in film­ing many action scenes.

    When you see the full grand­stands — I’m surely one of the blurry specs — but who knows which one!

  80. Kirk said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:28 pm

    A legit­i­mate claim to fame, Deb­o­rah, but you’re right: “Clam­bake” really sucks, like most of the rest of his movies. “King Cre­ole” is the only one that’s any good, but it’s weird see­ing Wal­ter Matthau play a heavy. Car­olyn Jones, though, is smokin’.

    And I sort of think I’ve seen part of “Dri­ven,” though there are plenty of bad rac­ing movies.

  81. joodyb said on June 26th, 2009 at 11:38 pm

    LAMary, all i could think of when i read that was Nathanael West.

    I hereby rank this thread No. 1 for Amaz­ing Com­menter Trivia.

  82. CrazyCatLady said on June 27th, 2009 at 12:45 am

    I was sad when Fred­die Mer­cury died on my birth­day. My sister-in-law’s birth­day is on Nov 22, the day of the Kennedy assas​si​na​tion​.It is what it is. Life goes on.

  83. Dexter said on June 27th, 2009 at 12:52 am

    Olber­mann was stunned after he got done i’viewing Deepak Chopra . The i’view starts at the 2:14 mark of this video…it’s all you need to know, as KO told Chopra at the end of the interview…stunning, must-see inter­view, trust me.

    http://​www​.msnbc​.msn​.com/​i​d​/​3​0​3​6​6​7​7​/​v​p​/​3​1​5​7​4​8​4​5​#​3​1​574845

  84. CrazyCatLady said on June 27th, 2009 at 1:13 am

    Yes, indeed, MJ’s death will give his career a new boost. Per­haps the Jack­son Fam­ily will fix up Nev­er­land Ranch and turn it into a Cal­i­for­nia Grace­land. Elvis has made more money since his death than he did in his entire career due to clever finan­cial moves and smart mar­ket­ing. My daugh­ter and I made a pil­grim­age to Grace­land last sum­mer. I wanted to have a bond­ing adven­ture with my all-too-soon to be on her own girl. It was a very good trip and she came away with a respect for Elvis, his tal­ent and his tragic demise. Yes, it was a learn­ing expe­ri­ence. I could imag­ine that with the proper han­dling, Nev­er­land could be a gold mine. MJ’s bills will be paid, and his leech-like fam­ily can con­tinue to ride the gravy train. Too bad. Because I have no doubt that bas­tard father of his was abu­sive and MJ was men­tally warped by it.

  85. Catherine said on June 27th, 2009 at 1:28 am

    I’m not sure the molesta­tion asso­ci­a­tions can ever be wiped clean from Nev­er­land (and I sure as hell can’t imag­ine a latter-day Paul Simon singing about a trip there). I would say the best out­come might be split­ting it into 5-acre ranchettes and sell­ing them as wine-country prop­erty. Sorry, I prob­a­bly have too much infor­ma­tion about Cen­tral CA real estate.

    Also, Joe Jack­son Sr.? Is no Priscilla Pres­ley when it comes to business.

  86. ROgirl said on June 27th, 2009 at 6:41 am

    Deepak…amazing! He clearly got through to the human being inside of Michael Jackson’s heart and head, but Michael was too dam­aged to escape by that point. He could just throw money at who­ever or what­ever he wanted at any moment, but he wouldn’t face the demons he was car­ry­ing with him from his childhood.

    The par­al­lels with Elvis are strik­ing. The sad demise of a mega-phenomenon who didn’t have the inner resources to deal with real life. Who clearly loved being in the spot­light, but was exploited by those who knew they could get some­thing out of him.

    MJ was much more savvy and self-aware than Elvis, and his behav­ior wasn’t just self-destructive, he also exploited oth­ers, hav­ing lived in the world of fame and mutual exploita­tion for almost his whole life.

  87. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 27th, 2009 at 9:37 am

    The Pacific coast­line surf
    was tat­tered like a roadie’s old t-shirt,
    I am leav­ing Santa Bar­bara
    up the high­way
    through the heart of TMZ’s biggest scoops,

    I’m going to Nev­er­land, Nev­er­land, Nev­er­land near the sea,
    I’m going to Neverland …

    Small boys and chil­dren and parent-free,
    and we are going to Nev­er­land.
    My trav­el­ing com­pan­ion is nine years old,
    he is the child of some pass­ing tourist,
    But i’ve rea­son to believe
    that we both will be received
    at Neverland.

    He comes back to tell me he’s gone,
    As if I couldn’t guess that
    As if I didn’t know my own greed,
    As if I’d never noticed,
    The way he brushed his hair from his sun­glasses,
    And he said los­ing the bid
    on the Ele­phant Man’s bones,
    Just leaves you blown apart;
    Every­body sees the cash blow (away),

    I’m going to Nev­er­land, Nev­er­land, Nev­er­land near the sea,
    I’m going to Neverland …

    Small boys and chil­dren and parent-free,
    and we are going to Nev­er­land.
    And my trav­el­ing com­pan­ion
    wears epaulets and lots of pock­ets,
    I’m look­ing at a ghostly guy already;
    But I’ve rea­son to believe
    We all will be received
    at Neverland.

    There’s an accoun­tant in the city,
    Who says this is like a tram­po­line,
    the cash flow’s falling, fly­ing,
    Or tum­bling in tur­moil I say
    Whoa, so this is what he means,
    He means we’re bounc­ing into Nev­er­land,
    And I see los­ing your home
    Is like a win­dow in your heart,
    Every­body sees you’re blown apart,
    Every­body feels the wind blow,

    In Nev­er­land, Nev­er­land, I’m going to Nev­er­land,
    For rea­sons I can­not explain
    There’s some part of me that wants to see
    Nev­er­land, [give the end­ing back to Paul Simon…]

    And I may be obliged to defend
    Every love every end­ing
    Or maybe there’s no oblig­a­tions now,
    Maybe I’ve a rea­son to believe
    We all will be received
    In Graceland.

  88. Danny said on June 27th, 2009 at 9:57 am

    Jeff, bril­liant… Wow.

    Hey, not to dilute everyone’s awe, but in the last thread, Nancy men­tioned that Farrah’s poster had dis­placed Carly Simon’s album cover. I had to look that up because I thought she that was talk­ing about this album, Play­ing Pos­sum. I don’t know why I’m drawn to this. Let’s just say it has a cer­tain Je ne sais quoi.

  89. coozledad said on June 27th, 2009 at 10:01 am

    I always won­der if the response to celebrity death, with all that vic­ar­i­ous grief, isn’t just another way for idiots to try to dis­tance them­selves emo­tion­ally from their fam­ily and friends.
    I have an idea, how­ever, of how you can restrain Wolf Blitzer and Larry King’s pend­ing fes­ti­val of grief for the next sadass enter­tainer: Have them eat a piece of the deceased. As soon as the body hits the slab at the LA coroner’s, lop off a fore­arm or a calf and run it through the Hobart, pack it in ice, and dis­trib­ute it to the out­lets. The gen­uine­ness and depth of the var­i­ous broadcaster’s grief would be as easy to assess as watch­ing them eat a cheeses­teak. Sort of a put up or shut up thing.
    Besides,the risk of con­tract­ing kuru is pretty small if you avoid CNS tissue.

  90. Jolene said on June 27th, 2009 at 10:19 am

    If noth­ing else, Jackson’s death has prompted some good writ­ing. Many good pieces on the WaPo web site and at the LA Times. Else­where, too, I’m sure, but there’s a limit.

  91. Catherine said on June 27th, 2009 at 11:34 am

    Good writ­ing at WaPo? Didja see Jeff’s masterpiece?!

    My kids came run­ning, ask­ing me what was so funny, when I read, “he is the child of some pass­ing tourist.”

  92. deb said on June 27th, 2009 at 2:56 pm

    jeff, that was absolutely brilliant.

    and danny, i thought nancy was refer­ring to the carly simon “no secrets” album cover. that had a cer­tain je ne sais quoi, too. i think it’s called nipples.

  93. basset said on June 27th, 2009 at 3:58 pm

    uhh, Danny, who­ever had that Play­ing Pos­sum pic up is not happy. Go look.

  94. Brandon said on June 27th, 2009 at 4:22 pm

    “There is a truly bad rac­ing movie called ‘Dri­ven’ –with Sly Stal­lone (is HE still alive?) and Burt Reynolds, and I was at the race at Chicago that they used in film­ing many action scenes.”

    Yes, Sylvester Stal­lone is still alive. I don’t know Dri­ven, but does any­one remem­ber Over the Top, about arm wrestling?

  95. Deborah said on June 27th, 2009 at 4:24 pm

    So funny jeff (tmmo) and Coo­zledad the thought of eat­ing the next dead celebrity is hilarious.

  96. brian stouder said on June 27th, 2009 at 5:03 pm

    Today’s adven­ture in exe­crable exposition:

    http://​www​.pharostri​bune​.com/​o​p​i​n​i​o​n​/​l​o​c​a​l​_​s​t​o​r​y​_​1​7​7​1​9​1​7​3​4​.​h​t​m​l​?​k​e​y​w​o​r​d​=​t​o​pstory

    The pro­pri­etress goes after Big Foot dolts-in-Journalism, a task for which she is fully accred­ited; and as an uncre­den­tialed news-consumer, I think small-time hacks like this old guy are within my per­mis­si­ble range of criticism.

    This fel­low presents a ver­i­ta­ble buf­fet of racism and fear and prejudice.…and the ques­tion is, how many of his read­ers are nod­ding ‘yes’ as they read him? One hopes that the answer is “Not many”; maybe he IS per­ceived as the vil­lage idiot that he clearly is.….but maybe not.

    A few morsels from his essay, with the some­what unwieldy head­line “As Rome went so the United States goes”:

    the open­ing:

    I have lived long in Amer­ica. I have seen its great­ness, and I have seen its weak­nesses. I have seen good times and bad times. The bad times always used to turn around so we could see the good com­ing again, but this time we are in trou­ble that pol­i­tics as usual will not get us out of.

    at this point, one is tempted to crit­i­cize the writer’s odd gram­mar, but I wanted to see what “bad times” this fel­low thought was so unique in 2009 Amer­ica — as opposed to 1863 Amer­ica, or 1934 Amer­ica, or 1942 Amer­ica, or 1969 America.….and then we come to

    One of the biggest trou­bles we have right now is that we have laws we do not enforce. We have immi­gra­tion laws that are null and void because of pol­i­tics. It seems the politi­cos would rather leave our bor­ders open than close them. The rea­son, of course, is the Latino vote.  — 

    and THEN I knew where this one-track rail­road was going! And note the speci­ficity! Lati­nos, I tell ya!!

    Many of these peo­ple are cold blooded killers, and some of them are undoubt­edly ter­ror­ists. (Do you remem­ber 9/11?) One of our government’s main jobs is to pro­tect the cit­i­zens of Amer­ica. They are fail­ing mis­er­ably in that respect for purely self­ish reasons.

    and then there’s a pun­gent dash of finan­cial myth to mix into this xeno­pho­bic melt­ing pot

    Another trou­ble is that gov­ern­ment has been derelict in its duty to over­see the lend­ing habits of our banks. In fact, our gov­ern­ment is guilty of forc­ing banks to make bad loans even when they were reluc­tant to do so.

    For the record, this guy churns out pap like this with dull reg­u­lar­ity; for all I know, the Pharos-Tribune doesn’t even pay him. But even if they don’t, it’s wasted space

  97. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 27th, 2009 at 10:49 pm

    Sylvester Stal­lone is still alive?

    (Ok, to be fair, i thought Rocky Bal­boa, aka Rocky VI, was amaz­ingly good; and he doesn’t get enough credit for the last scene in “First Blood” with Richard Crenna, the oft for­got­ten orig­i­nal Rambo movie, which is pretty good storytelling.)

  98. coozledad said on June 27th, 2009 at 10:55 pm

    Wal­ter Cronkite is get­ting ready to die. Robert Trout died a cou­ple of years back. What they brought to broad­cast news would be dis­missed by the flakes who run it now.
    Sucks.

  99. brian stouder said on June 27th, 2009 at 11:38 pm

    btw Jeff, let me also add my com­pli­ments; your Nev­er­land homage to Grace­land was superb!

    Speak­ing of Nev­er­land, did you see this?

    http://​www​.msnbc​.msn​.com/​i​d​/​3​1​5​8​6​6​6​0​/​n​s​/​u​s​_​n​e​w​s​-​faith/

    an excerpt:

    LOUISVILLE, Ky. — A gun-toting Ken­tucky pas­tor says it’s OK to bring weapons to church — at least for one day. Ken Pagano asked his flock to bring their unloaded hand­guns — in hol­sters — to New Bethel Church in Louisville for a cel­e­bra­tion of the Sec­ond Amend­ment of the U.S. Con­sti­tu­tion that guar­an­tees the right to bear arms.

    One sup­poses that in a nation of 300 mil­lion peo­ple, lunatics such as that pas­tor will be ‘in the mix’.

    Pos­si­bly there is another who urges their flock to bring (unloaded) liquor bot­tles to church, to cel­e­brate the 21st Amendment.

    One won­ders if Pas­tor Pagano is a gung-ho sup­porter of the 19th Amend­ment; more power to him, if he is

  100. MichaelG said on June 28th, 2009 at 12:11 am

    The media’s orgy of adu­la­tion and revi­sion­ism over the barely cool corpse of Michael Jack­son con­tin­ues apace. The autopsy results are not even in yet and Jesse Jack­son is already demand­ing a recount. He may not know any­thing about foren­sic med­i­cine but he knows a photo op when he sees one and he’s cer­tain, as are we all, that the County of Los Ange­les is deter­mined to bury the truth about poor St. Michael’s victimhood.

  101. CrazyCatLady said on June 28th, 2009 at 12:12 am

    Jeff (The Mild Man­nered One) That was bril­liant! Kudos!!!!

  102. Rana said on June 28th, 2009 at 1:47 am

    *applaud­ing Jeff (tmmo)‘s opus*

  103. Danny said on June 28th, 2009 at 2:21 am

    Weird, bas­set. Funny how that site doesn’t actu­ally own the copy­right to the image (pre­sum­ably Carly Simon does or the record com­pany), but then they’re bitchin’ about how me link­ing to it vio­lates their copyright.

    Nancy, when you get time can you edit my post to refer to this link?

    http://​www​.ama​zon​.com/​g​p​/​p​r​o​d​u​c​t​/​i​m​a​g​e​s​/​B​0​0​0​0​0​2​G​X​W​/​r​e​f​=​d​p​_​i​m​a​g​e​_​t​e​x​t​_​0​?​i​e​=​U​T​F​8​&​a​m​p​;​n​=​5​1​7​4​&​a​m​p​;​s​=music

    Geesh… Ama­zon won’t cry.

  104. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 28th, 2009 at 8:05 am

    Most churches i work with, like the one i’m sup­ply­ing this morn­ing, have a sign at each door made nec­es­sary by the bulging brains of the State­house Gang, say­ing that the “con­cealed carry law” they passed a few years ago does not apply. A bare hand­ful of large, hyper-conservative churches told them that they didn’t want a gen­eral exclu­sion in the law, so we, like 24 con­ve­nience stores and school build­ings, are required by law to put up a sign say­ing that the law’s pro­vi­sions are not valid inside our structure.

    http://​is​.gd/1gUmP [pdf warn­ing, but if you want to see the obnox­ious­ness that churches, schools, and non­profit orgs had to put up all over the state, here it is.]

    I guess i should be glad they even let us have the sign based exclu­sion, but they really aggra­vate me. At any rate, since they all are signed, i can’t think of any who would have a “bring your piece to wor­ship” Sunday.

    Now, on Memo­r­ial Day week­end, the Methodist Church i sup­plied had a color guard bring in the flag (fine, i don’t let it bother me), and they had two men with their funeral ser­vice M-1s at shoul­der arms walk­ing down the aisle. I asked myself “if i were pas­tor here, and some­how didn’t know this was hap­pen­ing before right now, what would i do?” It was very queasy mak­ing, and i had a period in my life where i got to learn the valu­able job skill of dis­as­sem­bling and reassem­bling an M-16A1 in the dark.

    Asked one of the lay lead­ers if they thought car­ry­ing rifles down the cen­ter aisle was a bit off for Chris­t­ian wor­ship, and she replied “well, they’re both mem­bers here!” That was either a non sequitur or a per­fectly ade­quate response in her context.

  105. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 28th, 2009 at 8:29 am

    Holy crow — just scrolled back enough to see all the kind words; you are all too kind, given that Paul Simon did the heavy lift­ing, and i just repur­posed some phrases here and there. I toyed with just a few lines at first and was going to post that, then i went and found the full lyrics (almost had it all in mind, but not quite) — when i saw that last stanza on the page, the one i didn’t change any of, i thought i should fin­ish the deal in mem­ory of the poor fellow.

    But if you have a taste for such stuff, here’s my Lenten dis­ci­pline from last spring (as usual, you see the last one first, in this case, the last of 50-some; it ended up being more than the pro­jected 40): http://​lin​den​placea​cad​emy​.blogspot​.com

  106. jcburns said on June 28th, 2009 at 8:40 am

    (I checked out Jeff’s PDF.) Gee, Ohio has ordained an Ord­nance Ordi­nance? (Yes, Nancy’s name sub­lim­i­nally embed­ded twice in one sen­tence.) And since I have this sign in our back­yard, I should prob­a­bly put up one of those, just so’s there’s no confusion.

  107. brian stouder said on June 28th, 2009 at 10:58 am

    jc — y’know, a few weeks ago Pammy joined in the neighborhood-wide garage sale extrav­a­ganza. More often than not, we skip it, but every 3rd or 4th year, we’re “in” — and usu­ally other fam­ily mem­bers take the oppor­tu­nity to bring stuff over and take advan­tage of the gen­uinely large amount of shop­ping activ­ity to sell their odds and ends, too.

    One mem­ber of our fam­ily, who met­ric­u­lated at some lit­tle col­lege in Ada, Ohio, brought many things, includ­ing a black and white reflec­tive road sign with a sil­hou­ette of the great state of Ohio and the num­ber 49 on it.

    On the back of the sign, there was a small sticker that said some­thing about being the prop­erty of Ohio, and sternly promised a stiff fine ($2500?) for defac­ing or steal­ing it.

    On reflec­tion (about 1.75 sec­onds) I with­drew that piece of mer­chan­dise from our offerings!

  108. alex said on June 28th, 2009 at 11:01 am

    Over­heard in Huntington:

    Didja hear Michael Jack­son died of food poi­son­ing? He ate a ten-year-old wiener.

  109. jcburns said on June 28th, 2009 at 12:18 pm

    May have to talk to you about that sign, Brian. I’ll hide it here south of the mason-dixon line. In other news: Billy Mays. Twit­ter tells me he is no more. Wel­come to the sum­mer of odd celebrity passings.

  110. Joe Kobiela said on June 28th, 2009 at 1:19 pm

    Their drop­ping like fly’s. Now Billy May’s The oxey clean guy is dead.
    Pilot Joe

  111. brian stouder said on June 28th, 2009 at 1:32 pm

    Joe, US Air­ways might be get­ting some scrutiny over the Mays thing; appar­ently he was in an excep­tion­ally hard land­ing at Tampa on Sat­ur­day — tires blew and debris was left on the run­way — after which he was inter­viewed by a local tv sta­tion, and he related how he took a hard clunk on the head.

    Who was the famous woman who clunked her head ski­ing, and then died of a closed-head injury?

    edit: from this msnbc article

    http://​www​.msnbc​.msn​.com/​i​d​/​3​1​5​9​6​0​0​3​/​n​s​/​u​s​_​n​e​w​s​-life/

    “All of a sud­den as we hit you know it was just the hard­est hit, all the things from the ceil­ing started drop­ping,” MyFox Tampa Bay quoted him as say­ing. “It hit me on the head, but I got a hard head.”

    U.S. Air­ways offi­cials said Sun­day they could not imme­di­ately con­firm that Mays was a passenger.

    Born William Mays in McK­ees Rocks, Pa., [Dorothy — he’s one of yours!] on July 20, 1958, Mays devel­oped his style demon­strat­ing knives, mops and other “as seen on TV” gad­gets on Atlantic City’s board­walk. For years he worked as a hired gun on the state fair and home show cir­cuits, attract­ing crowds with his boom­ing voice and genial manner.

  112. ROgirl said on June 28th, 2009 at 1:35 pm

    Natasha Richard­son

    Gee, why couldn’t Dick Cheney have bumped his head? or Bernie Madoff?

  113. 4dbirds said on June 28th, 2009 at 1:50 pm

    My hubby and I always called him Billy Mays Hays because of the movie Major League where there was a char­ac­ter Willy Mays Hays.

  114. Dexter said on June 28th, 2009 at 2:21 pm

    Too bad…I always thought Michael Jack­son was a cre­ation of Berry Gordy to be used to siphon cash out of the par­ents of lit­tle pre-teen girls. I never under­stood how adults could get into his shtick. I never under­stood how a 1994 civil suit could end a crim­i­nal case, either. The kid never recanted, as I recall. Then the 2005 case — exon­er­ated , and right away the jurors held pressers say­ing they voted wrong — they were con­vinced Jack­son was a pedophile!
    So he’s dead, and then Billy Mays, who I hated with a pas­sion, now is dead.
    From what I gather, Jack­son was a ter­mi­nal junkie, hooked on hill­billy heroin, demerol, per­haps mor­phine, and he had a fond­ness for Elvis’s standby, dilau­did.
    And poor loud­mouth Mays gets conked on the nog­gin cour­tesy of US Air­ways, eh?
    C’est la muere.

  115. mark said on June 28th, 2009 at 2:48 pm

    RO girl–

    That’s what I love about all you enlight­ened pro­gres­sives: the amount of time you spend wish­ing for death and suf­fer­ing for peo­ple you don’t like.

    Yeah, I know, you don’t really think that. It’s a joke. Ha ha. Such wit.

  116. beb said on June 28th, 2009 at 2:50 pm

    My wife and I heard a vari­a­tion of the food poi­son­ing joke as we were leav­ing a 7 – 11. The teller was a young woman to another cus­tomer. The far­ther we got from the build­ing the more appalled we were

    Billy Mays dead? At this point I think I should go back to bed and hope that when Mon­day arrives life will be a lit­tle more normal.

  117. coozledad said on June 28th, 2009 at 3:09 pm

    Seems to me Cheney done gone out and stirred him up a heap o’ death and suf­fer­ing, while his fan­boys beat off into a towel and prayed for bombs to fall on Iran. I don’t care what hap­pens to the bas­tard as long as he stands before a crim­i­nal court. But old five defer­ments will never have to answer to any­body.
    At least we know that he’ll go to his grave one of the most roundly despised world-historical douchebags of sweet fuck all.

  118. Dexter said on June 28th, 2009 at 4:02 pm

    What the hell? USA leads Brazil 2 – 1 at the 70 minute mark? This is impos­si­ble!
    Last week USA beats the best team in the world and now this? I guess I bet­ter try to find it on TV.…

  119. moe99 said on June 28th, 2009 at 5:03 pm

    oh, mark. you really don’t need to con­firm your bona fides like that.

  120. Kirk said on June 28th, 2009 at 5:26 pm

    Gale Storm bites the dust, too. Any­one remem­ber her? My Lit­tle Margie?

  121. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 28th, 2009 at 5:35 pm

    My mom tried to change her name as a kid to Gale she liked her so much (and dis­liked her birth first name, which i will respect­fully not repeat here). So i feel i know of her, but can’t think of any­thing i’ve ever watched with her in it.

  122. Bruce Fields said on June 28th, 2009 at 6:02 pm

    “C’est la muere”

    Lost me there. “C’est la mort”, maybe?

  123. Dorothy said on June 28th, 2009 at 6:03 pm

    I take no glee in Mr. Mays’ death (and I don’t give a rat’s ass that he’s a for­mer Pitts­burgher), but I for one am pleased beyond rea­son that I won’t have to hear his loud-assed voice any­more for any new prod­ucts on tele­vi­sion. Now if only the guy who does the com­mer­cials for local com­pany called Amer­i­can Freight would just SHUT UP already!

  124. Kirk said on June 28th, 2009 at 6:33 pm

    Dozens of other obnox­ious loud-asses are ready to fill the breach.

  125. ROgirl said on June 28th, 2009 at 6:47 pm

    I always switch the chan­nel when he comes on. No joke.

    At least he didn’t die past his prime, sick, on drugs, broke, or sur­rounded by sycophants.

  126. Jeff (the mild-mannered one) said on June 28th, 2009 at 7:22 pm

    What on earth makes any of you think his ads will stop run­ning? Billy will live on … he just won’t add new prod­uct lines.

  127. Dexter said on June 28th, 2009 at 8:36 pm

    Sorry, Bruce! It’s my “pidgin-French”! I thought muere meant “tran­si­tion­ing through death…” or some­thing like that…looks like my mem­ory let me down and I got my lan­guages mixed up, too! I know one thing, I ain’t smart enough to argue your point.

    Oh hell yes, Gale Storm. LOVED the name, loved the show…Mom watched it on the B &W Motorola and we kids did too…loved that show , as we loved “Our Miss Brooks.”

  128. beb said on June 29th, 2009 at 7:37 am

    OK, the death of Gale Storm at 87 is not so bad. She had a great life and a long one. As obnox­ious as Billy Mays was, no one deserves to die at age 50 from stuff falling on his head.

    Coolzedad, what up? You’re sound­ing more and more like caliban.

    Is this the longest thread nancy has ever had?

  129. brian stouder said on June 29th, 2009 at 8:40 am

    Is this the longest thread nancy has ever had?

    I think she reported pluck­ing a record-breaking-length ‘Andy’ a few weeks ago…

  130. nancy said on June 29th, 2009 at 8:54 am

    How soon you all for­get. It was Goe­glein, by a mile — well over 500.

  131. brian stouder said on June 29th, 2009 at 8:59 am

    But this could be a silver-medalist, eh? Although come to think of it, dur­ing the elec­tion cycle we might have a had a few 130+ deals

  132. coozledad said on June 29th, 2009 at 9:37 am

    Soory, beb. It’s the phony polit­i­cal cor­rect­ness ooz­ing from the right that really gripes my ass. They’ve under­cut their own argu­ments in this regard so many times it’s just trans­par­ent nihilsm. Maybe that’s what they mean when they shout “free­dom”. I sup­pose the absence of of any ideas con­sti­tutes a sort of freedom.